Strange Bedfellows: Part 1

This transcript is machine-generated and may contain errors in names, terminology, or attribution.

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Um, I think they mean us. Oh, s***. Um... [clears throat] With an incredible duo sure to take home the comedy gold. Olympic Highlights with Kevin Hart and Kenan Thompson. New episodes Monday, Wednesday and Friday. Only on Peacock. Hey guys, Brianna here. Real quick before your episode, I wanted to remind you guys about NobleNight.com. Yes, yes, you've heard their name from us a bunch these last few months. But just hear me out. NobleNight.com has all of the role-playing games you could possibly need. All of the role-playing accessories and all of those little miniatures that some people just absolutely love, including myself.

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So if you live in the Illinois-Wisconsin area, in the last GMT, Jason and I were just talking about how some of those specialty shops can seem really unwelcoming to outsiders. And honestly, from looking at the pictures, this is a shop I would love to go to. So if you live nearby, definitely go in and check them out. And again, tell them that we sent you. Alright, I'm going to let you get to your episode now. Won't bother you anymore. And I hope you enjoy the episode. Thanks. Bye. Let's do that thing where we go around the table and introduce ourselves. I'm Jason, I'm the Dungeon Master, going around the table to start with Kelsey.

Hey, I'm Kelsey and I play Diana, the Tiefling Mage. And Tom. Hi, I'm Tom, I play Yanward Firestorm. And Delmar. Hi, I'm a blast from the past and I play Asusinefe. And Robert. This is Rob, I play Malchus Grimnus, Tiefling Warlock. Last time on the show, you guys may or may not remember that you were traveling from Bandit's Rest where Duncan was going to kind of shed his Adventurer's Guard and hand everything over to you guys for now and try to actually infiltrate the new vault in Bandit's Rest and see if he can get closer to his dad. Now, that leaves you guys in an interesting position because you sort of just dumped whatever you were doing there in Bandit's Rest and you decided that you were going to go here with the Drowhead to say in Fairbay.

Now, to get there, you'd have to travel to Whitehedge, and then from Whitehedge to Lochfort, and then down to Fairbay. So, you did manage to make it to Whitehedge after an encounter with some gnolls. And you did make pretty short work of them. You stayed the night in Whitehedge, and I believe you said you were going to sort of just travel to Lochfort the next day, right? We were on the road and then we were attacked by gnolls. Yes. I got hit by a cart. It was embarrassing. Yes. I had my unfortunate incident with the net, didn't I? Oh yes. That's what happened.

Nets and holes are enemies to the Grimnus. Oh, it's rough life, you guys. You know what sucks about that? You've had really badass moments where the bat wings, spiny thorns, covered in fire, take flight, all this stuff, and then nets and holes. Yeah. Like, it's such a... that doesn't seem like that should take you out. I picture him falling in the hole but trying to spread his wings to fly out of it, but it's a really narrow hole. It's almost like he's just slapping the sides like a fish. Oh no. So, you guys are on your way to Lochfort now. Yes. So, let's pick things up on the 19th of Amada.

Well, was there anything in the cart that would have been a big deal? Because there was a wagon thing. We ended right after the combat. Yes. Do me a favor, why don't you roll a flat d20? Me, me, me, me. I'm gonna back off. Oh. Oh, okay. Cool. Alright. You guys are going to find this empty cart. Well, I would rather have it for the cart than for a journey through Lochfort. Well, the problem is that this one... See, after it took that tumble and slammed into a certain tiefling and kind of tumbled down the road... Not very big. Well, no, but the tumble itself, it's not you specifically, it's just the act of flipping end over end, sort of ruined its axles, so it's just kind of a broken cart now.

I feel like life could have been worse rolling a natural one on the random d20 roll. Yes, it could have. Yeah, exactly. It's like, I'll take the empty cart, I'll take that. You open the back of the cart and discover a mass of pythons. Everybody can track spotulism. They're python werewolves, guys. They were on their way back home. Werethons. So, now, quick question. Are you guys planning to stop in Lochfort or are you just sort of drifting through town and continuing on? Because if memory serves, you did run a check on Lochfort and... Yeah, we know it's not the best area.

It's not the best area, but that's pretty much all you know. I don't think, unless we have a reason to stop, I don't think we would because Marcus and I did some checks and we were like, "Yeah, that's not a nice place." Yeah, that's a nice place. Just walk on by. Roll them up. Wait for the future group 4 skeletons as we pass. As you look out into the fog, you see figures. How are we doing in supplies, though? We just stopped at White Hedge. Yeah, you just stopped at White Hedge and you did get... Oh yeah, that's right. You're right. Never mind. Yeah, you'd have your basic rations and stuff.

You'd have stuff to eat and you'd have fresh water and... Usually that lasts for a few days. Usually it's enough... We have a lion. He can hunt, right? That's what lions do. That is racist. That is so racist. He's a boy lion. He doesn't do shit. Exactly. He lays around and takes maps. He's like my cat. I'm a breeding lion. He just looks around for his sugar mama. We'll find her one. Not just one, they have their parents' maps. Lucky devil. So, you guys are gonna breeze on past Lautford. Let's do a thing. Let's do a fun thing. Who would like to roll a flat d20 for me?

Oomie oomie! Everybody back up or I'll shoot. I'm not touching the dice. Did it burst? You wanna take mine or his? Let's say it. Yennward said it, so I think we should take Yennward's. It's for everyone at home. My first roll was a one earlier for the cart. Everyone got mad at me. I rolled an eight this time. I feel like I redeemed myself compared to Sassoon's four. An eight is better than a one. I love the teamwork. A me-slip. Well, since Yennward jumped up and down and said me-o-me-o-me, next time we're gonna take someone else's. Ah, but I'm always so good. How many dragons have you got in your group, man?

Like three. Like 303. We're gonna get the key then. He almost got the one. Get an activator. Wandering, you're gonna be well outside the border of Lotford. But everyone do me a favor, roll a perception check for me. Oh yay. Rachel, I hope you're good at these. I don't think we have anyone in our group. Yep, that's about right. This isn't right. Normally I see everything. You rolled two. Yeah. The first one was an accident. The second one was right. Obviously. Natural one, so I'm on point. Alright. Malchus as intended. It's not a bug, it's a feature. It's his endearing perception.

Nailed it. Look at those perception checks. Listeners at home, we have not generated a die roll above an eight across the entire perception span in this party. Did you know, fun fact, there ain't a single, well there's one Grimnast that is any good at perception rolls. One. It's not even the bonus, it's the dice. Yeah, it's not. But that's the thing, they're always low dice rolls. Yeah. Combined with the not trained in it and not having high wisdom stat in sight. Yeah. Anyway. What sucks is perception is one of my bigger ones. And it's like one of the really critical skills too.

Like, it is the difference between life and death, very often. I feel like as tall as Yennard is, he should be able to see some shit. He's never seen something. Oh, he's also Yennard. But he's got hair in his eyes. Having watched a cow run headlong into a barbed wire fence this weekend, I feel like you need a stronger case. But I'm still gonna wait before that thing comes about. Poor cows. Poor cows, seriously. So the party is going to be glancing around and they obviously realize they're nearing the town of Lautford. And Sassoon and Diana are going to give some glances toward- I noticed something, guys.

Yeah, they're going to give some glances toward town and they're going to see that it looks fairly- It looks pretty much like any other town. You see people coming in, going out. There's some sort of trade. You see one lone wagon sort of stumble into town. It doesn't look to be in the best of shape, but it is being welcomed by some people. They're unloading some sacks from the back of it. It doesn't look like the disaster area that it's being painted as in some of the stories that you've heard. Well, that's good. So moving right along. Let's see, you guys are going to be traveling for hours on the road here.

And night is going to be falling here pretty soon. And right about the time that night is going to fall, you're going to be smack dab in the middle of Houncer's Bounty. So that's right in between Fair Bay and Lockford, and that's going to put you a little under a day's travel from your destination. So I don't know if you want to keep going or set up camp or what you'd like to do. Let's just push on through. Whoa, whoa, whoa, nighttime walking, really? Or, I mean, where are we exactly, Jason? You are a few hours outside of Lockford. So you are away from the Silverglade.

Yeah, forget what I said earlier. Let's keep walking. Sorry, I apologize, Tom. I'm so sorry. I feel like sleeping in the wilderness in Theria at night has been no more or less dangerous than walking in the wilderness. Like, we don't win more for being stationary. Well, I feel like Rob, you saying that is presenting it. Like, considering the last time you did this. What was the example of last time? I don't remember. Well, the last time Rob had a character that camped. Oh, no, he knew, he knew. Oh, that. Oh, that. Honestly, I, well, okay. If you get, come on, that's one time.

It's lycanthropy under the bridge, people. Yeah. That was a long time ago. That can't possibly happen twice. Right? Let me put that on the record. That can't possibly happen twice. I defy you, luck. I mean, Theria is an uplifting place where people are pulled up by their bootstraps, often. And maybe even hung on them. Please don't listen to the next Group 4 episode. Oh, God. Oh, goodie. No, this'll be like a campout. Let's, whatever, let's do it. I feel so special that I know spoilers. Okay, Jason, do we get, like, take a negative for just pushing on through the night?

Yeah, you do. Okay. What type of negative? Well, you're gonna take a negative one across the board to pretty much everything for staying up all night. Let's sleep, you guys. No, no, no. We're not carrying bad math into bad luck. I mean, there has to be some sort of penalty, and I've had this out with other people. Well, yes, yes. I mean, I wasn't expecting there not to be, but. Can we, like, do Perception to find a safe place to sleep? Like a cave or something? It's a few hours away. I think we push our luck and go. I'm with Tom. Perfectly. It's right down the road.

I can go either way. Then here we go. It's Rob's outnumbered. We're going down. Oh, no. We'll be fine. This either just saved our lives, or it's gonna go really bad really fast. So you guys are going to continue through the night. Robert, do me a favor. Roll a flat D20 for me. Oh, no. Okay, here. Everybody blow on my dice. Jason told you to do it so if it's bad, it's his fault. I knew that would play well on audio, so that's fine. That's what you get. Okay, here it comes. Daddy needs a new pair of shoes. Here we go. That's right. Daddy got them new shoes. Well, the group is going to travel throughout the night and hours are going to go by.

Just one. And about six or seven hours outside of Lockford. This is going to put you almost dead center in between the two towns. You're going to see a figure coming up. And I want everyone to do me a favor. Roll a perception check for me. Ooh. What? High five, Yenward. Yeah. I'm off my game. That's nature. Hold on. That's above perception. Ooh, look at these flowers. Hey. Dude. What the hell am I looking at? What am I so distracted by? Triple 21s. Oh, yeah. Well, Yenward, Diana, and Malkus are going to sort of take in the nighttime atmosphere. And beyond a couple of frightful rustic sounds hours ago when you're near the town of Lockford, it's been pretty quiet.

Just the sound of crickets and the occasional birds, something like that. Very, very quiet for walking around nighttime. And that's mostly because you're staying to the path. You're only a few people. It's been pretty quiet. But you are going to see a figure up ahead in the darkness. This appears to be a minotaur. And they appear to be sort of poking at something near the side of the road. They appear to be alone. So what would the party like to do? I'd like to get closer, but I don't want to stop to investigate. I want to see what he's doing as we're passing him.

And if he stops us, then we'll address it. And if he doesn't, we're going to keep going. Okay. Hey, Rachel. Yes. What would you be doing as the group approaches? Poking at something, apparently? You kids ever seen a dead body? What time is it? Oh, this is the dead of night. This is somewhere around, let's say, about the equivalent of three in the morning. I would say maybe covering up fire actually at the end of the night. Because it's early, so maybe just finishing up cooking and stuff. Kind of stirring the fire a bit. So maybe there's coals or embers, I guess.

Also, I have a passive perception of 24. Would I potentially hear them? Well, I think we found who was going to be making perception rolls. Hey, I said a plus 12. She's good. I'm the wisdom person here. Let me see your character. I mean, resume. Resume. Yeah, once they got a bit closer, you'd hear them coming. I don't think this particular group is stealthy. Don't know what you're talking about. Plunk, plunk, plunk. I don't envision them traveling very stealthily. I call it the Yenward Silent Stone. Yenward Silent Stone. I'm like the knight. Yeah, I'd probably just be stirring the fires and maybe kind of sitting and looking around at the night, relaxing, maybe snacking on some berries or something.

Nice grass. Gotta get some good chewing in. Is it full moon or is it dark? It's fairly dark. There's a portion of a moon out. Okay, so I probably wouldn't see them. I would just see figures. Yeah, you just see figures and a couple of them look to be larger than the average traveler. Okay. I may kind of wave, since I can't really see them, just kind of like in a friendly, you know, good early morning. Please don't stab me type of thing. Please don't stab me. Yeah, like I'm minding my own business, guys. What about Yenward? Saying that it's another minute till we're out on the road.

Like would there be any reaction to that or is it just like, oh, another person, like it doesn't matter. Can you tell that it's a minotaur? Oh, yeah. Okay. Yeah, the only thing that would be kind of a large standout is this particular minotaur doesn't appear to have any horns. Okay, I got something. I'm going to go up to nameless so far and I'm going to go, "Hi, good evening, how are you?" I'm going to jump up and be, because now he's close enough, obviously I could see him, and be like, "You are King Yenward." I'm going to turn around and look at the group.

Malchus just cups his head in his hands. You guys. Yes, I am. King Yenward at your service. It appears someone has wounded you. Where are your horns? I was bored without them and I'm going to look really straightening my robes up and flattening them out a little bit. And then she'll clap her hand to her chest, trying to be official, and be like, "King Yenward, I would like to pledge myself to your service." I'm going to turn back to the group. What do you bring to the table? My humble servants. Turn back to the group. Well, I lived for several years with the elves, so I'm very good at healing.

And I can sew. You're in. You haven't even passed her name yet. Oh, what's your name? Teveen Brightheart. That doesn't sound scary. I think she's cool. So we're going to go do some stuff and it's going to lead to us reclaiming the glory of the minotaurs and stuff. It's going to be really cool. So if you want to come, you can. Or you can sit here and do what you're doing. But we've got to get going. So she's going to nod and kind of look at the rest of the party. And the rest of your entourage I see are mixed. Who are your friends? I subjugated them years ago. They're nobody.

Theo's going to lean over to Malkus. So is Yenward in charge now again? Or what is happening? I don't even know. This is a waking nightmare. Would she hear that or not? I'm assuming not. Roll a perception. But my passive is twenty-four. No, don't be that person. What? We had someone else doing the passive thing. That was Dan, actually. For like two years I had to explain to him what passive perception was. I know. Okay. Twenty-eight. Yeah, you'd hear that. I'm going to kind of lean around and be like, "Good evening! He may not be in charge of everybody, but I'm a fellow minotaur and I respect him as a leader to my kind." Yeah.

So he's just kind of like high. Like just kind of wave. But yeah. You hear that, Malkus? Leader. Malkus steps forward and just kind of, as long as we're playing at court, he just kind of like over-elaborately bows and says, "Malkus Grimnus. Substantially less subjugated than advertised." But still subjugated. Malkus just glares. He just- She'll bow to Veen. Theo's just going to wave again, Theo. She'll wave back, kind of like, topping basically whatever they motion to her. Diana will incline her head. I'm Diana. May I ask why you're out here alone? This isn't exactly the safest area.

I've been traveling, trying to catch up with King Anwar here. I've heard that he recently came into the throne and I wish to pledge my allegiance and service. Ah. May I ask, we've been on the road for quite a while. What is the situation in Minitar Lands right now? I honestly am not sure. I came from the Evergreen shortly after the war. Okay, so this is a getting back in touch with your roots thing. Yeah, you could say that. I would like to be among my people again. How did you get separated in the first place? I got sold in the market. From which market? In Aubrey.

I was sold in Durnhollow. It's like Minitar's talking about their alma maters. I'm from Durnhollow. I pledge Durnhollow. That's so good. And then she's going to look over to my butcher named Sisun. Yeah, they're all good. Yeah, she's going to look at you because I'm assuming she's never seen one of whatever you are. A thundercat. Hey-o! And you are? I am Isum-Suna-Fe. It is a pleasure. And he's going to grab your hand to shake it and he's going to lean in and do the women not have horns? Well, most female minotaur do have horns. I'm from a smaller clan that didn't have horns.

And she's going to look really kind of like uncomfortable saying it. Because it's not something that likes to be called out all the time. Okay, I was going to pick up on that. I am sorry, I didn't mean to offend. No, you don't offend. It's a thing. Yenward's completely oblivious. How do you fight without horns? How do you defend yourself at all? She's going to look almost appalled and she's like, "I'm not much of a fighter, more of a farmer and a seamstress, and I can heal." If you're terribly opposed to violence, our group is probably not the best to be traveling around with.

We have a bit of a history. I wouldn't say I'm opposed to violence, but I'm not one to pick a fight. We are. Well... Theories kind of pipe up, we are. Are you afraid of battle when it breaks out? Not necessarily. As long as you aren't picking a fight with small innocent children or kittens. Hey look, okay? They weren't that innocent, they robbed me. She's going to look really concerned at you. We only set a few of them on fire, kinda. It's fine. I'm going to assume that was Draconis. Yes, but Draconis is no longer traveling with us, so we're much safer in that regard.

Theo's going to raise his hand like he has a question. Theo. Are you adverse to kidnapping? Um... I would say that I... I can turn a blind eye. I may not participate, but I won't help. Or stop you. Okay, he's gonna kind of narrow his eyes like, "Hmm, she'll probably fit in with you guys." Look, in the interest of not staying out longer after dark in Theria, let's keep moving. And you can tentatively travel with us until we make a more concrete judgement. Having another minotaur, this healer at that in our party, will certainly not hurt. And with good ears too, it seems.

She's gonna nod and say, "Thank you so much." And then quickly... She only has a small bag, so she's just gonna pack it up real quick with her few items. And then just take some dirt on her little tiny fire pit that she had. But I'm ready if you are. Alright, servants, let's go! This is going awesome. Very quickly. And... King Yenward. Don't you think... Forever and always. Do you not think you should establish some rules? I mean, please forgive me, Miss Tavine, but you are a stranger who we met in the woods in the middle of the night. He was gonna raise his hand like he has a question.

Theia. I was the stranger that you picked up in the middle of the night. I rescued you from them. You chose to stay. So we don't let her walk at the back. We put her near the middle where some of us can watch her. Hey, you need to know me first. Be first. Let's not be hasty mountains. A familiar refrain. Okay, golden rule. Don't hurt any of us. There! She's gonna kind of look down because she obviously has no weapons. She has a totem at one side and that's it. She's like, "I think the most I could do would be to club you over the head with this and I don't know if that would do much good." Yeah.

See, it's fine. All in favor? Tentatively. I'm not opposed. Just weary. I have no objections at the moment. Theo's gonna shrug. Good old Theo. Then it's settled. You are officially my court healer. Let us go. Malchus kind of whispers to Theo, "You should be happy. You actually have some seniority over someone here now." Is that how it works? Do you know if you kill Yennward you become king of the minotaurs? True story. Do I get the crown? I'm shit. Uh oh. Come on, you're fun. We'll keep you around. Yennward would like to indignantly straighten his crown and begin his walk towards Lockford.

For those of you who couldn't see at home, Yennward would pull a perception check and would effort that. But yeah, it's very obvious. They're joking. It's very obvious. Or it should be. He fucked you up, Theo. So do you guys have a particular place you would like me to walk until... ...earn your trust? She's gonna look at you guys seriously because you guys obviously seem... ...weary of her. She doesn't want to step on anybody's toes or anything. She's trying to be polite. Somewhere in the middle works. Even if we did know you completely, as a healer, if a fight were to break out on either side, that's probably the best place for you anyways.

You know what? I have an idea. You right here feel right behind her. If she tries anything funny, put her down. How tall is Theo? Not very. Because I'm seven foot two. Yeah, so Theo would look up at me, put her down how? You know what to do. Pat his back. He's gonna stab me in the back of my ankles. Don't forget, Theo. You felled a dragon once. I don't think that's how that happened. That's how I remember it. So you guys are gonna continue to walk toward Fair Bay here. And you've got a ways to go. Can I briefly, I guess like as we walk, kind of sidle up to Taveen and push a little further?

Sure. So, Taveen. Yes? You recognized Yenward as king of the minotaur. What have you actually heard about him? I mean, a few of the elves that came back injured that I helped heal described him as tall, dark minotaur with horns and the giant... it is an axe, right? Yes. Okay. Stop for a hammer for a second. You know, the giant axe. And then I saw he had a crown. So kind of put a few things together. All you heard was about his physical appearance, not about his deeds, behavior, whatnot. Not too much. Because I lived on the outskirts of Kalkaus. So I mostly heard that he has been traveling around, helped fight the war, and has since become king of the minotaurs.

But not too much more than that because I mostly just helped with the healing as the injured came in. Hmm. So is there something calling to you, as it were, as far as rebuilding a minotaur kingdom? Was there anything wrong with living with the elves or just trying to make a new spot in history for the minotaur? Well, I've always wanted to reconnect with other minotaurs, specifically the, I guess you could say, normal minotaurs with horns because I didn't grow up around them too much and I know they're different sometimes than my small clan that I came from.

So I was hoping maybe to find, I guess, sanctuary with the rest of the minotaurs. Kind of reconnect. I feel like we keep running into people with this sentiment. It's unfamiliar to me. I never consider myself playing for Team Tieflings where my family is whoever is kind to me and watches my back. I don't. It's a strange sentiment. Let's just put it that way. Well maybe I'll look at me as a sister one day. I may look at you as a brother, but I would like to get to know more minotaur specifically since that is, you know, obviously what I am. Malkus allows himself a little bit of a grin and he says, "Well, at the very least, I like your optimism." Was Theo trying to sneak up now?

Oh, he was sort of following behind Tevin and listening and if he thought you guys were done he would sort of sidle up to Malkus. Just one second. Is the family thing because of the whole demon stuff? The family thing is because of the whole practical survival tactic. I've never found being among my people or anyone else's people to be any more or less secure. So I judge people based on their behavior. Everyone's an individual. Although I've said some dirty things about Drow lately, I really should dial that back. Did you have a bad run-in with the Drow?

I mean, besides the dragon thing. Well, no actually. Just made a terrible first impression. Perhaps I am overdue to extend some more courtesy to people I have unfairly judged. Well, maybe we'll like what they have to say in Fairbank. Alright, don't both of you go getting optimistic. That's not how this crew works. Come on. So why exactly are you guys heading to Fairbank? I don't know how, I guess they're probably all just having a pretty close together. So if Diana would have heard that and no one else said anything, she would have stepped up. I don't think we're like whispering.

I think it's just like a casual conversation, like a stand by me talk where everyone's just walking in one direction and talking fairly loud. Malchus points at Diana and says, "That's this one's business." Smooth. She probably has a name. Malchus, oh, he just pointed while he said it. Theo's gonna raise his hand. Yes, Theo. Can I give her a name? No. Inadvisable, Theo. He's gonna look down like, "Fine." She did say her name though. Earlier, right? Yeah, it's just it's more. Now Malchus is kind of just enjoying this. He's like, "Wait a second, whisper it to me first." He's going to whisper into Malchus's ear, "I guess I'll type this to you?" Yeah, go ahead.

I'll Skype it. Private Skype or something. Sure. So Diana, I guess it was, right? Yes, that is this one's name. Malchus snickers and just high fives Theo. She's blatantly ignoring you guys as per usual. Right. You were asking about our destination? Yeah, Fair Bay. Yes, we, well, during our previous travels we, well, I suppose this actually goes back to before the Battle of the Overwatch. King Yanward, I suppose, he made a deal of sorts with the leader of the drow, and we are going to Fair Bay to follow up on that. And potentially this could lead to the minotaurs getting back their mountain, but we have yet to see exactly what the drow have come up with since we last spoke with them.

I see. Well, I guess a king should at least try to keep his deals and promises. Yes, it's a good start. Is there any other reason, I guess, that you particularly follow King Yanward or any of you, I suppose? Hmm, that's more of a difficult question. We've all kind of come together for different reasons. I have personal business in Esterhold and was on the way and sticking with this group, I've been with them through the Battle of the Overwatch and since then, so... It seemed like something interesting. Do you have family or would you say this is your family then?

She's not trying to be crying, but she's kind of looking like... Yeah, because Malkus just said that. Dan's going to kind of smile. I don't know if she'll be able to see it because I assume it's the dark out, but not the happy smile kind of it. Family is an interesting term. That's complicated. Very, very complicated. Sometimes you're just stuck together because it's the best way to stay not dead. Not dead is a very good way to be. Indeed. You said that you were trying to find King Yanward. Where exactly were you headed? I was on my way to Brightport because I heard that's where you might be headed.

Okay. That's the last known location. That makes sense. Did you encounter any trouble on the way over here? Jason? Would I have? For you, actually, the trip has been fairly smooth. No, I was surprisingly uneventful. I guess it stayed enough to the side of the road that I managed to avoid most trouble or traveled during the calm times. I suppose you've been a bit luckier than we've been. No dragons or anything of that sort. I've yet to see a dragon, so I'm not going to lie, I'm a little excited to see one and also quite terrified. Oh, give it time, give it time.

Hopefully more time. Unless... One thing we can agree on? You guys are going to walk through the night and the sun is going to sort of start to peek into the sky. And light is going to fill the environment here and you are going to be able to see a hell of a lot clearer, obviously. Now, you're a couple of hours away from the town of Fair Bay proper. You guys are just going to keep walking. Can I run a nature check to take care of nature? Yeah, do a nature check. You sure can. Go right ahead. If it's daylight, we probably should take a walk. Good morning, Mother Nature.

If it's starting to be really, really bright, Taveen's going to put on her hat. She has a big hat. She has a hat! Like a farmer's hat. Oh, like a fluffy hat. Like a big straw hat. That is adorable. With flowers in it. Oh my god. So, Suisun would see the telltale signs of a very specific creature. And this is a creature that is pretty native to Fair Bay. That is the kobold. *gasp* Now, kobolds are nasty little creatures. She's seen a smile on my face. Kobolds are nasty little creatures that like to dig holes and set traps. They're normally just a nuisance for people traveling on the road.

Unfortunately, if they get the drop on you, or if they get a chance to really swarm you, they can do some damage. They have been known to kill people before. Most of the times they are after valuable shiny objects, things like that. But they have been known in a pinch, if food is scarce, to actually eat people. *gulp* Now, Suisun is going to spot a couple of signs that would give him pause. Maybe just like, "Okay, there's probably kobolds in the area." No outright traps or anything like that in the road, but just the broken branches, things like that.

Where they've probably traveled in packs, probably maybe got the jump on one or two people. You can't really tell if there's been any in the area recently, but they definitely have been here. Uh, relay that to the party, let them know. Be on your toes. How far away are we? About two hours. Do we see any other travelers on the road, Jason? This is the morning, right? It's, yeah, it's very early morning, so not quite yet. Okay. Just to say, we either stop and rest now or we rest once we get to Fair Bay. Two hours away! We want to sleep before we have the meeting with him.

There's no reason we can't arrive in town and get a room and sleep before we announce our presence to the royalty. Probably already know already, but... True. Would you guys be also meeting with a dignitary or higher representative of the drought? Why do you ask? She's gonna kinda look around and go, "Well, I'm not saying you're shabby, but we could all use probably a little cleanup before presenting ourselves." Agreed. You're always gonna sniff his armpit, you shrug. It should be noted that while you guys did bathe in Brightport... Yeah, it's been a while.

There's been a... No, we bathed... Well, I made sure that I had a good cleanup in the city previous to the city that we skipped. Okay, so White Hedge. White Hedge, that's the way. So, there was a... We said it in there. Yeah, that's true. There was a stop there, so... But you have been walking for quite a distance. You've been on the road for quite a distance, so... Yeah. Yeah, no, it's... we need to rest up and get not stinky. It's definitely not as bad as you guys have been in the past. Group 1 has sometimes traveled for many days without any sort of... Just covered in viscous.

So you're gonna continue on to Fair Bay, right? Yep. Sure. Kelsey... Come on, truck you. Hmm. Do me a favor, Roll of Life, E20. Can I pass? No. Yep, I will do it for you, sweetie. Just you sit right there. I already... Oh, God. I don't wanna do this. Can I roll? Together we rolled a 24, Jason. That's how math works. Wrong, I bet. Oh... What did Taveen say about not seeing dragons? I was... Jason. I was just about to say that. Isn't that a dragon you wanted to see? That was a little one. That was a four, Jason. That was a two, technically. I mean, I'm just looking at... I never agreed to look in the hole for a reading.

Sorry, Paul. So it needs to be one step less awful than a dragon. Minimal. Minimal. Sixty drakes. That's what... Sixty. I'll finish the dragon. I'll finish the dragon. That's what I was thinking, Don't worry. Actually. What if we think it's a dragon, but then we're getting punked? The embarrassment is the thing. The embarrassment is the real dragon. Actually... Approaching the town. I'd like everyone to do me a favor and roll a perception check. Okay. I'm good at these. Of course I get a 15, then. Okay. Okay. Let's see how it is. Actually was... I got a 19 on that one.

I was good at that. You got a 26 total. That's pretty great. I rolled a crit fail. Welcome to group one. I'm really dirty, so it's bothering me. Yeah, the hat. Floppy hat got in your way. It keeps the sun out. It does not help with the whole scene stuff. Yeah, especially if it's flying. Diana, Yenward, Sisun... Wait, no, Malchus. Malchus didn't roll. Oh, I didn't... Oh, wait, you... Sorry, I'm still thinking about the flash. That's okay. Totally cool. Hey! Alright! Yeah, you gotta roll for the theo. You got the lowest. Actually, I will roll for theo. Wait, maybe not. Yeah, maybe not.

Dang! You're just two points lower than info. With a plus 12! I haven't even tripped in it. What? I'm not trading perception. You should be. We need somebody to see stuff. I have a plus six to wisdom. Oh, that'll do it. So, let's see here. Diana, Yenward, Sisun, and Malchus. They're all going to notice something very interesting coming up to the town of Fairbay. There's these huge fields of tall, wavy grass. And since it's just becoming fall, that grass is starting to go brown a little bit. It makes this really soothing rustling sound. Most of the time it's soothing.

Everyone wants to know something will come charging out of the grass. And it makes it very difficult to detect it. But most of the time it's just very soothing and nice. Kind of a windy plains type of thing. And you're going to come over the hill and you are going to see the town of Fairbay. And this is as quaint as towns are pretty much allowed to get in the world. It is a small town right on the side of this little port. And there's fishing boats sort of out in the water. And you're going to see townspeople scurrying back and forth and doing their daily business and such.

You're going to see a couple of hunters leaving town in the opposite direction to head into the woods. And you guys are going to see something else. You're going to see a number of drow. You're going to see about four standing on either side of the town waiting for people to enter and leave. And then you're going to see a larger grouping in the center of town. What would you guys like to do? Well, I mean, I don't know what we can do but continue on at this point. You want to share the information. Yeah, yeah, yeah. This is going to visibly look a bit more tensed up seeing all these drow, especially after last time.

Can we tell if they're like, are they all in armor? Are they looking like martial law? They look to be the same type of drow that you guys have encountered before. These are armored up, weapons brandished. Like they are militant, let's put it that way. What's the body language of the people down below? Doesn't appear to be bothering them too much. Every once in a while you'll see someone give sort of a side-eye glance to one of them, but they don't appear to be harassing anyone or anything like that. People are, you know, they seem to be living their normal lives, but it's kind of tough to tell from back this far.

Are any travelers coming far enough up in our direction to be asked? Not yet. Like I said, there are hunters leaving in the opposite direction, but no one appears to be coming up your way yet. Can we get... Yenward's not worried about it. Can he trek ahead? Can Yenward just charge into town? Yeah. Not charge in, just walk in. Right, just walk in. Yeah. Okay. Like a little stick of shower before we talk. Is the party going with Yenward or is this a thing where Yenward's just gonna go by himself? I'm probably gonna settle closer up to Yenward, like as he's leading from the front, just so everyone behind us is "safe".

We're all going into the town now soon, so... Yeah, I'd be following. I'll stay near the back of this advance. So would Theo, yeah. That would, yeah. And I'm in the middle. I'll stay in the middle, buddies. Malchus whispers to Theo, he's like, "Brace yourself, this is the part where my prejudice gets justified." Theo's eyes are gonna go just a little wide. Like, "Wait, what? We're expecting a fight?" Tip number one, always expect a fight. Sauntering up to this gate. These drow are going to stiffen up a bit. And one of them's gonna sort of hold up their hands, just like, "Okay, hold up, hold up." What's your business here?

Good morning, my name is King Yenward, I have business with Oraclad. I would like it if you would advise her that we'll be seeing her this afternoon after we get cleaned up. You're a king. Absolutely, don't you see my crown? Yeah, he has the crown. King of what? All the minotaurs. This guy's gonna look over to the one standing closest to him and just like, "Is he serious? Is that a thing?" And the one's just gonna kind of shrug. He's gonna say, "And you're here to see Oraclad." Yes, we have business. Wait here a moment. Okay. As that drow guy walks away, I'm assuming he's looking away because he said, "Wait here a moment." I'm gonna turn and look at Yenward and kind of nudge him with my elbow to get his attention.

Yeah, what's up? King Yenward, why must we answer to these gutter elves? No. They are not the protectors of this town. They are not the security. They are not the mayor. They are not the tribe leader. Why must we answer to them? Look, dude, I know we could fucking tear through them as easy as we want to, but like, I need to talk to their moms, so just be cool. Okay, Susan's gonna fix his shield, look at Yenward and nod, and then just stand to that attention. How loud were you guys talking? I would say quiet because I nudged over for him to lean in so I could talk to him.

Okay. Okay. After time, this drow's gonna return from the center of town. You can all enter. She is expecting you this afternoon, though. I would not keep her waiting much longer. Absolutely not. Thank you very much. Servants, onward. I'll stand there and let everybody go past first. The animals are incline her head at the drow she goes by, like, respectfully. As everyone's past, I'm just giving them the dirtiest look. If looks could kill, they'd be dead dirty elves right now. Fuck my drow. Pause. They're gonna return it right back. I'm just gonna show them the front teeth like, "Yeah, you see these?" I've seen a house cat be real pissed at me, and I can just picture the face.

Oh yeah, I know that face. Just disdain. The mane all bristled up, hissing. So, Tavine isn't gonna notice any of this. She's probably just in awe looking at the city, because she hasn't traveled much. So, she's just, "Wow. Fair Bay." So, what would you guys like to do now that you're in town? What do we see? What do we see? What do we see in town? Well, do me a favor and roll a perception check, guys. I want to. Since I am looking. I rolled twice for some reason. I don't know why. That's crazy. Yes! Didn't suck. Can Malkus throw down a streetwise to try to get to subtly get the- You sure can.

Well, specifically with the intent to figure out why the droves seem like they're in charge, but without, say, leaving a rumor trail that a tiefling was asking about that. Right. Okay. Okay. Holy shit! 32! I have the street wisdom. Let me bestow upon you the street wisdom. Jason, tell them my street wisdom. Guys, this is mountain street wisdom. The street is made out of a nice cobblestone. Some- a little bit of grinding in there. A couple of days ago, Oraclad and her people arrived in Fair Bay. And ever since then, the drow have been monitoring who comes and goes.

They are not- they haven't locked the town down per se, but they are very guarded about who might approach. And there are rumors in town that Ora is meeting with another drow, and they're going to be discussing some very sensitive business, hence all the extra security. Oh! So, looking at these troops, can I see, like, two distinct factions among them? These all appear to be the same people. Like, these all appear to be under the same banner. Okay. Do they have, like, Oraclad on Team Logo on them? Pretty much, yeah. They all have the same etchings in their armor and stuff like that.

And it's sort of, like, the elves kind of have the same look to them, it's just a bit more gothic, and it's colored differently, obviously, because they're a bit more gothic. A bit more gothic. For lack of a better term. They're emo elves, that's what they are. Okay. I relay all that information to the party. In case they wouldn't like to use it for something. Can we get a shower and maybe a nap? Because Dan doesn't want to deal with anything before that happens, honestly. You sure can. There is an inn in town. There is also a bar. Now... No. No! No? There's not a bar, Jason.

There's a bar? Round of Skull-Splitter on Theo. Yeah. I can see this going very badly. This is not... So I heard you wanted to meet me. It's up to you guys what you'd like to do. But, yeah, if you guys want to just go chill at the inn, there's an inn in town and you guys can pop down some coin and you can settle in and get a bath. Yes. I would like... Well, after everybody... Blah, blah. I would like to explore the town, see what's going on for myself. Just walk around for a bit before I head to the inn. Okay. Sure. The town itself... Do me a favor and roll one more Perception check.

I can do that for you. Thank you. And I keep rolling too. This is some double-picking. That wasn't all of us, Android. I don't... So walking around, there is a heavy drow presence, as it was discussed before. And every time Sassoon walks by, they're gonna sort of side-eye him. Like, if there was gonna be trouble, it might be Catman here. There's also a bar called the Tipsy Pig. That sounds fun. And you're gonna see a steady stream of people enter and leave this bar. A couple of them are drow, actually. Is there any religious establishments in this town? See, religion is not a huge thing in Fairbank.

They do have a small temple where you can pray and everything, but it isn't really devoted to any one god. It's kind of the same setup as White Hedge, where they had a... Stone circle... Not even that. Like, it's just a small building where you can go in and pray to your chosen god. And they have small statues dedicated to each one of them. Yeah, it's a very eclectic setup, as far as religion goes. They really haven't had... Fairbank hasn't really had the kind of strife that makes people gravitate to a religion, if that makes sense. Okay, I would like to go to Temple, pay my respects, as per usual.

Okay. Should I roll the religion check, or...? I mean, you don't really just... Alright, cool, yeah. So pray, shout out to all the family members, come back to... I need to cut, like, I wanna be in town, but somewhere where it's... Well, obviously I'm a lion dude, so I'm gonna stick out anyway, but somewhere I could just be able to sit down and watch what's going on. Well, there are these little benches on the side of the street, 'cause they have these awnings. Think kind of an old West town type of thing, where they have these awnings, people sit in the shade and sort of watch travelers go by.

Because Fair Bay's kind of a town where people go through. It's in between major cities like Brightport and Esterholt, so it's just kind of a place where you're kind of breezing through for the night, you stay, something like that. Very few people settle down in Fair Bay, because a lot of people find the life to be boring. It's just hunting and fishing, and you just kind of grow crops and do your daily life thing, so yeah. Well, I'll find a seat and just hunker down for now. Okay. What about the rest of the party here? Are they all just pretty much getting scrubbed down?

Yeah, probably. Also, I was wondering, how long would we have to rest, I guess, to not be weary or any of that? I'd say you'd need about a five or six hour sleep, which is about how long you have before you're around. Okay. I'm so sorry, do we have enough time to get a decent rest before... Yeah, you can scrub down and then grab a nap. Naps are great. Yeah, that would also get you back your dailies and such. That would be an extended rest. Yay! Malchus will sleep and bathe, but when he wakes up, he does kind of want to get a Bloody Mary or something before he starts his evening.

You can totally do that. Let me... Okay, so Malchus is going to scrub down and take a nap. Is anyone else heading to the bar with Malchus? After the sleeping. After the sleeping, of course. Yes. Is anyone going to join him? Nope. No. If you see me in town and you want to come say hi, but otherwise I'll just be in the same place. Not even Genward? No drink for Genward? Ah, fuck it, I'll come. That's the spirit. Is there any kind of little quiet outdoor courtyard area? Dude, Fair Bay is pretty much all quiet courtyard. Oh, okay. Fair Bay is a super quaint little town.

I would probably find a little spot and sit down and maybe finish stitching my edge on my shirt, jacket, or whatever. I imagine that I was at some point working on a fancy embroidery, so I'd probably sit down and continue working on it a little bit until they're ready to go. Okay, so Malchus and Genward are going to go across the street and go into this little establishment called the Tipsy Pig. And when you do, there's going to be this little chime. So heading in there's going to be this little chime, and do me a favor, Malchus, Genward, roll a Perception check for me.

Okeydokey. Hey, twin 20s! How is that? Wow, that's amazing. Thanks for using all the crits, guys. We are primed for the alcohol. You are ready to go. You're on point. You guys are going to walk into this bar, and right off the bat you're going to notice a few more drow. Now, these particular drow appear to be either off duty or just relaxing and getting a drink, something like that. They are going to tense up a bit when you both walk in. You are going to notice that a majority of people in the bar are just everyday Fair Bay-ins. I don't know what the pluralization of Fair Bay people would be.

But Fair Bay peeps, who are probably just, you know, they just came back from a hunt or something like that, and they're just relaxing with a drink. There's also going to be this tiny tiefling woman who is almost going to bounce in your direction, who appears to be made of chipper sunshine. Ooh. And she's going to approach the two of you. Hi! Hi. Good evening. Can I get you guys a table or anything? Please, for two. Extra sturdy chair for this one. And she's going to cast a glance up at Yenward. And Yenward towers over this girl. And she is going to cheerfully lead you to a corner of this bar.

Sort of a smaller table, just for two people that could sit there comfortably. And what did you guys want to drink? Is there a literal Bloody Mary in Theria? There's an equivalent. Equivalent? I asked for the Therian equivalent of a Bloody Mary. Okay. What about Yenward? I've only really had Skull Splitter. I'll have what he's having. Wait, wait, wait, wait. Looks at Yenward. Do you like tomatoes? I love tomatoes. Okay, get him one of what I'm having. She is going to nod and then almost sort of skip, almost, back to the bar. And she is going to get your drinks ready.

Is there anything you'd like to do before she comes back? So, yeah, the Malkins make small talk with Yenward for the time being. So have you thought about what you're going to say when you come across our distinguished, you know, the person? I haven't slept much. Not at all. I think I'm just going to wing it. Stupendous! How are those Bloody Marys coming? She is going to make her way back to your table and place two glasses down in front of you. You guys can pay me when you're getting ready to go. Okay. Will do. Well, I mean, like, what can possibly go wrong?

We already have the deal on the table. We're just going to meet up and, you know, see that the deal is still on the table and then we're going to do it. But Yenward, this town is full of extremely edgy dark elves. You heard the part where I explained that there are two factions in town and there's some tension, right? Yeah, but I think the ones we're friends with are, you know, they're better. I wasn't aware we were friends with any of them. I just don't want to be the spark that lights the powder keg. Me and Ora clatter friends, that's enough. Malchus holds up his glass and says, "Here's to hoping you're right." Cheers.

Anything else of note happening in the bar, Jason? Oh, you're being eyeballed just by these drow. And it would appear as though they're eyeballing anyone with weapons, anyone who appears to be an outsider, someone who isn't from town, someone who could cause some sort of trouble. But they're not doing anything. They're not advancing on you. They're just watching. Malchus has made like extra sure to like, you know, pull a little bit of overcoat aside so that they can see his... you just can't say so they can see his rod without that sound. He wants them to know that he has the magic.

He has the zingzag. I got the magic stick. I know I can't use it. He can make the boom boom if need be. So, step. That's all I'm saying. Right. No, you want these drow to see your magic stick. Yeah. So I invite him to the back room and then... No, no, no, no, no. Funk guitar. Funk guitar. Oh, I'm sorry. I was going Pulp Fiction with him. Oh, all the Pulp Fiction fans are just cackling now. Tweet me if you embarrassed yourself at work, listeners. Well, it's just about time for your meeting. Are you going to assemble the Avengers here? Yes. Do we only get through one drink or do we do we go deeper before that time comes?

That's up to you guys. If you... you have time for a few drinks. You know, in the interest of Yenward's confession that he's just going to wing it, Malchus will stick with one and then get a celebratory follow up later. OK, what about Yenward? Does Yenward like the taste of a Bloody Mary? Not really. No? Not your thing? No. OK. Well, do me a favor. Each of you roll an endurance check with a plus three. Because you only had one drink. Oh, and Malchus covers the tab. Aww. That's nice of you. Well, you know, just in case it doesn't... in case it just slips by if we don't say something.

Oh, no. Oh, no. Oh, no. The seventeen, dude. You guys are twinsies. Plus three. Yeah, we keep getting the right ones. Yeah, you guys are twinsies today. Yeah, you guys are just feeling a little relaxed. Like, you're not... you're not... you're not as tense as when you went in there. Nothing huge. You guys are... you guys are handling your liquor really well. What better mood for noble diplomacy than relaxed? I defy you to find a better mood. This is going well, guys. This... oh. This is... this is going well. I'm... I'm... I'm waiting for it to not go well. Like, I'm just...

Oh, my god. Stupendous. Let's go meet some nobles. The group is going to assemble in the center of town after a time. And these drow are going to direct you into... Well, it's not actually really hard to find them. It's where the most... the bulk of them are congregating. And it looks to be a small... Not abandoned building, but for the purposes of right now, it appears to be completely drow-occupied. How would you guys like to approach this situation? We have an appointment. You do, but, like, are you just going to walk right in? Or are you just... it's totally up to you.

I just want to... just to set a scene. Well, Diana's probably gonna... I mean, Yanwood's gonna go first, obviously, because he's... But no, no, wait. Oh, he's not? Okay. I want to pull Theo aside. Here's the deal. I want you to go in, like, first first. And I want you to declare, "Hear ye, hear ye, King Yanwood has arrived!" And then after you say that, we're gonna walk away. Are... are you sure? I've never been more sure of anything, really. Oh, god. Can... can we hear this? He said he pulled him aside, so I'm not sure if this is... Okay. Theo's gonna give a... kind of a... kind of an unwary glance.

Like, just sort of a... he's gonna glance back to the rest of the party, like, "Okay, I'm gonna go, guys." Just... he's gonna walk into the building. And these drow are going to tense up immediately, like, "What the fuck are you doing in here?" Because they don't... they don't... they don't know Theo from anything. That's about the reaction Diana's gonna have, like, "What the fuck are you doing?" And he is going to very slowly creep into this building, sort of clenching and unclenching his fists. You can see him visibly sweating. That voice cracks. Here, here.

That voice doesn't crack. He needs to sell this hard. Well, you know what? Let's see how well he's gonna sell this. Oh, no. Sure, subject it to a roll. The dice have been balanced for us tonight. It'd be good for me. I hate everything. You know what? This is the worst. You guys all suck. Rachel. Yeah? Do me a favor and roll a flat d20. Okay. I'm counting on you, Rachel. Be cool. Yes! Oh! Rachel, you're the best. Rachel, I love you. You're the best. That's right. You can stay. Fuck it. Theo's voice turns into James Earl Jones. He actually has the spirit blessings. Yeah, you do.

It's like a Morgan Freeman monologue. Once in a generation, there comes a minotaur. Never in my life have I ever seen... [Laughter] He is going to stand in the center of this doorway. And you can see him kind of clench and unclench his fist. He's very nervous and he's going to sort of look down, take a deep breath. Attention, everyone! And everyone's going to look at Theo. Hear ye? And he's going to pause for a second like, "This is fucking stupid." You just gotta keep going on at this point. You gotta say "Hear ye" twice. And he's realizing everyone's looking at him.

You can't stop me. Hear ye, hear ye! The honorable King Yenward to see Miss Orclad. And he is going to back away from the doorway and bow. Yenward is going to walk in the doorway, his chest puffed out, bottom jaw stuck out. And he's going to do that walk where you put one heel in front of the other. That really regal king walk. [Laughter] Sisun's going to be following behind him, hitting his hand against his shield. Next to Sisun, he kind of looks me up towards the front for this. I'll be in the back-ish. Just following. No strutting. [Laughter] Malchus is sauntering in with his crew and he tries to catch Theo's eye and just kind of give him the thumbs up.

Just like, "You really saw that. You really..." Theo's going to glance to Malchus, kind of wide-eyed, like, "Are they murdering us yet?" Everyone do me a favor, roll Perception. Okay. Yenward's probably going to be low because he's just, like, falling to this. Okay, that makes sense. I did actually roll pretty high. That makes sense. I like how you came up with an excuse for his lack of Perception performance. Dude, Yenward hears regal trumpets. He's seeing carpets being rolled out. He has his eyes closed. He's not even looking. [Laughter] God, Sisun, Diana, and Taveen.

This room is not very well lit at all. It appears as though all the shutters have been closed. Beyond the opening in the doorway that is letting light in, this house is sort of deep. It's more narrow and long than anything. And toward the back of it, you're going to see there is a table set up, sort of a long table. And on the opposite end of it, you're going to see two female drow sitting down. One of them is clearly meant to be sitting in the center. That would be Oraclad, and then there is a second drow who Taveen wouldn't recognize, but that would be Meyla.

And there are several other drow in this room. You're counting no less than 14. The majority of them are in the doorway, currently gawking at you as you enter this room. I'm guessing you're just going to continue to walk. [Laughter] To a point, and then I want to address Oraclad. Well good afternoon, Miss Oraclad. I'm so sorry to keep you waiting. My subjects were very filthy from the trip and I had to get them cleaned up. But now we're all presentable and we're here and we're ready to get down to business. Or is going to stand up and sort of give this half bow to not just Yenward, but the party.

Which is going to address Yenward specifically. King Yenward. It's so good to see you again. And there's just a hint of sarcasm at the word king just because of the way you introduced yourself. I don't know if anyone else is but Diana's going to kind of bow back. I don't know if anyone else is getting this, but that voice is like spiders laying eggs in my ears. [Laughter] Oh you should hear Seraph. Oh. He's great. He's so great. I'm so hyped for this. [Laughter] Why don't you all have a seat? So it's mine if I do, thank you. Malgus finds a seat and he's clearly getting, like, he's clearly kind of re-attuning himself to the seriousness of the situation now that he realizes he's in like a closed chamber full of these elves.

Yeah, I'm going to look at Yenward and shake my head and back up to the door and just stand there and watch. Diana will take a seat next to you, Yenward. I'll probably stand kind of off to the side, but I'm probably not going to take a seat. I'm just kind of watching. Meila is going to lean over and whisper something in Ora's ear. Ooh, do I notice. Um, roll perception. Oh, that bitch. [Laughter] Is that one going to find you? Oh no. Oh yeah, Sassoon would notice. You would also notice that Meila is clearly making eye contact with Sassoon while she's whispering in Ora's ear.

I prob- [Laughter] I'm going to give her a head nod just to show her that I see her. Man's out here. Meila's going to give you a wide smile. Ora's going to address the party. Meila told me that some of the members of your party are uncomfortable with some of us. I'm sorry to hear that. We had a bit of an incident with some of your men in the woods, but we can clear that up later. Of course. I suppose we should get formalities underway. How was your trip to Fair Bay? Pretty uneventful, considering. We ran into a dragon, and we slayed him, and your men relieved us of the spoils of that victory, but- I can hear a gruff from the background.

Malchus clamps his teeth down on his lower lip. Diana's just going to close her eyes for like a few seconds, just like wiring things up. Tevien, what's up? Tevien looks a hair insulted. It was uneventful. Theo's going to say nothing. Where did Theo go when everyone else kind of took their positions? It took him a while to- like he didn't know how long he was supposed to bow. Everyone else just sitting down, staring at the floor. There's a good couple of seconds where everyone's kind of making introductions and such, and he's like, "Okay." And he's going to double time it, like do that speed walk thing behind everybody to get back in line.

But yeah, he had no idea what he was doing there. I heard about that too. Please accept my humblest apologies. We are going to need those scales though for a coming altercation. I hope you understand. Fair enough, but we will be expecting compensation upon the completion of our deal. Of course. Trust me, if all goes well, you'll be more than handsomely compensated. Thank you for noticing. Anyway. You remember the terms of our arrangements. Absolutely. We both rush in, we take care of our little problem, we get the upstairs, you get the downstairs, we all live happily ever after.

Yes. Well, I'm afraid there's been a slight change of plan. We still wish to take over Stonesunder, and we would like to offer our aid, but we have aligned ourselves with a third party who we feel can be very beneficial to us in the long run. Everyone's going to turn around in this chair and look. He'll be joining us shortly, within the next day or so. My question to you and your party would be, would you mind helping us run an errand in the town of Asterhold? You'd be canning. We can pay you whatever you ask. In return for a favor there. And then we can march on Stonesunder if you wish.

Okay. How pressing of a matter is this? Can it wait? I'm afraid it's personal, for this individual. Do you know much about the city of Asterhold? Me personally, no. But maybe someone in my party? She's going to glance over the party. Would that be a check? Unless you have any backstory stuff in Asterhold, then yes. Go ahead and run a history check. Unless you have history? Unless you have something there already, you can just go, "Oh, I would know this because of this." Like if you have family members living there, or some sort of event occurred there that you would know about.

I'm guessing that doesn't really... technically a family member. Not really. Not technically. So, let's see here. So the group here would know that Asterhold is a pretty major city that stayed out of most of the conflict with the Overwatch. There is a pretty mountainous terrain separating the two cities, and it's kind of difficult to get back and forth with the checkpoints. So, that's how they managed to protect themselves. It's mostly a commerce-driven city. They have some pretty ritzy shops and things like that. They're fairly well-off people. They also have one of the best grouping of orphanages in all of the area.

Homeless children are cared for very well in Asterhold, actually. That would be the bulk of the information that you guys would know. What exactly do you need from me and my mother? And women? The third party we mentioned. Yes. They wish to take over the city. This particular drow feels that the management there is woefully unprepared for what's coming. Unfortunately, there's a group that is standing in its way. He wants you to kill them. We want you to assist him. He wants to look over the party. Just kind of judge how they feel about it, like their faces.

So, we won't give anything away. He's just straight-faced. We'll discuss this later. Tevain would probably not look mad, but maybe not comfortable. Just kind of uneasy, maybe shifting a little. Diana is intrigued. Before I go into too many specifics, is this something that would interest you? Interests or not, it would seem we don't have a choice. I try not to wrap our people up in personal business, but this individual carries with him a fairly large group of drow. We could use them in the coming fight. Alright, where do we sign up? Take some time to think about this.

Just one question for peace of mind. Go on. Are you sending us to kill an innocent man? She's going to lean back. We're under the belief that no one is completely innocent. If it makes you feel any better, it's a small group of adventurers. I'm sure they've killed many people themselves. There are only about five or six of them. You can hear it straight from his mouth when he arrives, if you like. You can take the evening to think about it. Talk it over with your party, if you like. I'd like to stand up from the table and ask your my party to stand up with me.

I suppose we'll reconvene in the morning and meet your mystery man. He already has to say. She's going to stand up and so is Mela. She's going to nod at you. Everyone is going to move away from the doorway, just to give you guys a wide berth. Good talk. We'll be making our leave. Thank you, Ora-Klad. You've been very hospitable. Thank you, King Yennward. We look forward to working with you one way or the other. Yes, ma'am. Come on, guys. Do the same thing I did before, let everybody else out of the room. Just stare daggers at Mela. Are you going to make that painfully obvious?

Oh god, yeah. Just that hurt specifically. Forget everybody else in the room. Once the rest of the party's left the room, Mela is going to blow Sassoon a kiss. Oh, I want to see you get hurt. He's going to spill the florid cool cowl. I picture him doing that thing cats do where they stick their tail up and shake it. And they kind of piss on them. So the party has something to talk about. Yeah, they do. No way, bro. I am no contract killer. No way. Do we want to take this conversation to a place and then make thorough perception checks to see if we can find out if we're followed/observed?

Well, we were probably going to be followed by the drow. I mean, that's a... Yeah, but we should at least... But how closely? At least, like, if there's a shot at generating a 25 perception and spotting who's spying on us, I'd like to go for it. I mean, I guess one of the rooms in the inn probably is the best bet. Kind of bugged, man. Can I streetwise up, say, some urchins for a couple gold apiece who will watch down the streets and tell me if they see anyone climbing the walls listening in the windows? I streetwise up some urchins. It's a verb. I streetwise them.

Jason did say there is a large contingency of orphans in the town. No, that's the other town. But you can go ahead, roll streetwise, and we're going to see how reliable these little children are. Not very. Not exceedingly. Yeah, you can go down by the docks and talk. There's no elves down there. Why are they 1920s newsies? Oh, the dice. What the trail. Trade you a nickel for my pickle, Spanky. Come on, mister, have them go to a day. So, yeah, they're going to sort of point you... No, no, I'm not asking them for a place. I want to pick the place and then... Right, and then they just sort of like hover around.

Sure, you can do that. Yeah, like, take the money, man. Sure. They just run off right, Jason. The kids just take money and go. No, no, no, not for a 15. They're not, you know... They're not the most eagle-eyed little children, but I mean, you know. I tell them there could be more business in it later if they're reliable. Guys, you can get some blood root with this money. I know a Dragonborn that would pay top dollar. So you guys got a little spot. You're secluded enough and you are fairly certain that no one is openly spying on you. Openly spying on us? Curve road ops.

So, get me inward. Is this... I don't... I'm not comfortable with killing, just killing. Likewise. Look, I'm not comfortable with it either, but let's hear them out. He might have a good reason. Babe, we don't really know enough information to... even know exactly what we'll be doing if we accept this. From the way I understand it, we are to be sent out as lapdogs to do the killing for this Ora Clad. So that her partner can get a leg up in this town. King Yennor, is this worth it? I said before I would help you, but what she's asking... is it worth it? I would say that this is perhaps more along the lines of assisting allies so that they can be stronger and in turn assist us with their strength.

I do not trust these people. I don't necessarily trust them either, but they're my best shot to get what I'm trying to get done, done. Sometimes you have to crack a few eggs. But... you are so full of surprises, Yennor. Look at Tevin. She came all this way looking for you. You are a beacon. You do not need to attract such shadowy accomplices. She came all this way for exactly this. If I don't get this done, she doesn't help me. And our people do a hand thing. We go back to a crumbling tower that will eventually be in the ground. Is there no other that you think would be willing to help you with your cause?

We could rally literally any other faction in all of Theria and I would feel more comfortable with this mission. But could we actually rally them? You give me a name for the place, I can meet them. Then so be it. But right now, I have Oraclad and I have that building tomorrow morning. So you have tonight to come up with a better option or I'm going in there and I'm hearing the man out. Look, I'm not saying you can't hear him out. I'm saying at the very least we should double check anything they tell us about their targets before we follow through with any of this.

And how do you suggest doing that? We'll get to the town as visitors and then we will investigate the other side of the story. But if by that point we've already accepted it then and then we find something we don't like then we'd be backstabbing them, which is suicide. What if... If the only answer we can give when we walk into that room is yes or die, then we shouldn't walk into that room in the first place. Then we're not even hearing them out. Then we're just getting subjugated by the drow. Like if the only way to go into that room and hear the rest of the details is to be in a situation where it's say yes or get shanked by elf knives, that's not a conversation.

She'll kind of like half shrug. We don't really know exactly what's going to happen once we find out more or even what that information will be. The waters may look calm but they may be deep. I know this is a risky idea but what if you were to send myself and Theo perhaps to this town to do our own investigation? Before you meet with this mystery ally? I think she said that the timeline was too tight. We don't... We can't get there and back with information before they're going to demand an answer. We don't even know who we're looking for yet. And it's not like your every move wouldn't be watched if you split from us.

Look, I know we don't know everything but town that cares deeply about orphans versus whatever a drow faction would do when they took over it? We're making the world a worse place. I mean, what are we willing to do to get back this kingdom? This was also a town that stayed relatively, or city I suppose, that stayed relatively out of the fight with Overwatch on either side. I understand fear of confrontation with a giant tyrannical regime. I'm not going to hold that against them. Yeah, that just makes them a neutral party. I technically was a neutral party.

I helped heal but only because I lived in proximity to the elves. King Yanwert, I put it to you like this. Do you want to be the king on the board or do you want to be a pawn? I'm the only one who can get this back for my people. And this is the only way I know how to do it. But, King Yanwert, it doesn't matter where we live. It's about being unified. We can live in the middle of the desert, we can live in a tower, we can live under a mountain. As long as our people are unified, it doesn't matter where we live. I don't know. Are your people unified? Truly?

Symbolism in home means a lot. You want another solution, Yanwert? Here's my pitch. We may have made a lot of enemies over the course of what we did to dismantle the Overwatch, but we also made a lot of allies. Your name means something to good people. We don't need to just take any hand that's there. We can walk away from the drow, find the people who care about us and who we know have a greater good of Theria on their minds and on their hearts. We can rally those people. Who wouldn't want a powerful tribe of minotaur allied with people who are interested in order and mercy?

Who are those people, Malchus? The other races just fought a war. The only possibility I would see are the elves and they just lost most of their home to Strahd. The only chance we can have to deal with them could be the beginning of a new alliance between minotaur and elves. We could do a great deal of practical diplomacy in establishing an alliance with minotaurs and elves that helps the minotaur get back their home and joins those two peoples as a team into the future. And those among others. We are now with the drow. Except they want us to perform a political assassination and hand them an innocent town.

Or at least a town that I can't damn to that. This is... Ynward, you know this is too dirty. I feel like I'm running out of time though. I need to do it now and the opportunity is here and it's fleeting and I need to grab it. Look, I think we're making a lot of assumptions. Let's sleep on it. Go hear the man out. If we don't like what he has to say, I'll follow you to wherever you lead me. Deal? But how do we walk out of that room? Do we tell them we've accepted and then never follow through? Do we tell them no and hope they don't execute us for knowing their plans?

They don't strike me as the type to leave witnesses. Look, I know that it might sound scary and that they might kill us but at the end of the day they need me to and I don't think they're going to be in a rush to put me down. I have some chips in my hand. So what's our leverage? Look at me. Good herd, all the minotaurs. That's our leverage. They can't take the mountain back by themselves. They need us. You kill me, there goes the minotaurs. You disbanded all of them. So I wouldn't worry about our safety. I won't be worried about the deal. Okay, out of character real quick.

Do we know what fraction of the total combat strength we're offering to this agreement from our end? If any, because who is Yenwood even recognized? Sshhhhhh. Technicalities. What I was about to have Malchus pitch was if we offer a third of the combat strength with whatever we rally to two thirds from the drow, there's nothing to keep them from two-on-one-ing us in our weakened state once the mountain's flipped over. But then I was like, well I don't know how much strength we're bringing. Well that's the thing. You don't know how much they're bringing, you don't know how much you're bringing and it kind of comes down to trust.

Do you trust these people? No, I do not. As far as I can throw them, no. That is the answer. Also they need to trust us, which the way Diana says that's what doing this would do. Like, secure that at least somewhat more. I mean if you don't want to talk about it anymore tonight we can sleep on it, but who walks into that room tomorrow because that strikes me as a place to get a knife between your ribs. If you wish to stay behind your roof you can, it's your choice. Anyone here who doesn't want to go, stay at the bar. Drink's on me. I'm going. I don't think any of us should be alone.

We should stick together. Well if it all goes south at least I get to cut loose against them. Guys, I think that's a pretty good time for us to stop for the evening. As long as you dare stop that, I am deeply insulted. My father was killed by a net. Tieflings and Nuts have a long standing feud. That's what happened to the mysterious Grimace Pager. Tom, how are you feeling right now? I'm conflicted now because I'm like, I always thought the drow were kind of shady but now you guys are like, kind of like watering that seed and it's like, I'm going to fuck up and it's going to be like cosmic implications for the whole world if I give the drow.

Yeah. Like any kind of foothold. But I don't know that either. That might also be an assumption and they might be fine. Petty Crime Yenward is a real cool dude. Political Assassination Yenward is not a guy I want to hang out with. Hey guys, this is Rachel. I play Tavine Brightheart on group one of Dungeons and Randomness podcasts. Please feel free to stop by iTunes and give us a five star review. Visit the Patreon and throw in a few bucks to help Jason and Bree run the show. Find us on Facebook and give us comments and fun things. Visit us on the forums and chat with all the people and follow us on Twitter at @dandrpodcast.