Distant Past

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Um, I think they mean us. Oh, s***. Um... [clears throat] With an incredible duo sure to take home the comedy gold. Olympic Highlights with Kevin Hart and Kenan Thompson. New episodes Monday, Wednesday and Friday. Only on Peacock. Episode 165 of the DNR Podcast is brought to you today in part by One Deck Dungeon. One Deck Dungeon is the Kickstarter campaign that has taken off huge. It's well into stretch goal territory. You get 54 cards in a deck. You play one of four characters, all exploring dungeons, working together, and amassing huge piles of treasure.

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It comes in an unpainted and painted version and is truly a sight to behold. If you have not seen it yet, go to dnrpodcast.com. That's d-a-n-d-r podcast dot com. Click the banner for The Behemoth at the top of the page and you'll be taken directly to that Kickstarter campaign. Give it some backing, show it some support, and hopefully you can get one of these gorgeous things in the mail for yourself. Let's do that thing where we go around the table and introduce ourselves. I'm Jason, I'm the Dungeon Master. Going around the table, start with Kira. Hi, I'm Kira.

I play Zoya Rook, a dwarf cleric. And Lisa. Hey, I'm Lisa and I play Elorath Beastinger, the halfling barbarian. And Karen. Hi, I'm Karen. I play Irina Stonebreaker, a mole paladin. And Valerie. Hi, I'm Valerie and I play Sora Greywing, the halfling ranger. Okay, you guys, last time made it to the city of Esterholt, it is still the seventh of Thorim. You talk to Craig and you kind of let him know what you're doing right now, what your quest is. There is a little matter of the dragon. You kind of let him know what's going on with that, or what you saw anyway.

He was already well aware that there was something going on with that. And they're going to send some people to investigate. In the meantime, I believe you guys talked about sort of avoiding the path toward Odysseia. When you get ready to leave the city on your way to Overwatch. Oh yeah. We can talk about that though. We can talk about that. Let's see which way you guys want to go. In the meantime, you were asked to deliver a message to Esterholt's current mayor. That would be Jadzi of Grace. Is there something you guys would like to do before that, or is it pretty much straight to the mayor's office?

I mean, I think we were getting ready to leave anyway, so I think we would just hit that and then head. Yeah. Because I feel like, weren't we on the steps saying our goodbyes, and I was like, "Oh, oh, wait, Mr. Craig first." Yeah, that's right. Yep, pretty much. So, this Esterholt's a pretty big city, right? It's a pretty sizable place. And as cities go, it's relatively well taken care of, despite some damage done by dragons and such. There's very nice, well taken care of cobblestone streets, and you'll see children running around and stuff like that. But for the most part, everything's pretty peaceful here.

It's pretty tranquil. There are some ritzy shops that sell things like wine and cheese and really fancy adventurer's gear. The thing is, a lot of this gear is a little more decorative than it is functional. Like, you'll have, I mean, all the way up to the point where you can buy weapons made of really soft metals, like gold, just to show off how, you know, "Oh, look at this. This sword was given to me by, it was a gift from blah blah blah." That type of thing. I would not use it in combat. Stupid. It is stupid. Very stupid. But there are people... A lot of what?

Can you see L.R.F. beating down some people with a fucking gold flail? A solid gold flail that bends the first time you use it again, so... But it would look really fancy. Yeah... She's so fancy, you know. On your way to the mayor's office, that's the kind of stuff you'll see. You'll pass a bunch of different shops and stuff. There's some reconstruction efforts and them getting rid of, like, downed debris and things like that. And some really messed up buildings. A couple of buildings just outright fell down. And when you get to the mayor's office, you're going to see some more paladins of cord kind of hanging out around the area, kind of standing guard, keeping an eye on things.

But they would not stop you if you wanted to walk right in. There appears to be a pretty open door policy to the mayor's office. It's not lies, but... It appears that way, anyway. The place isn't closed up. As a matter of fact, everyone do me a favor and roll perception for me. Yeah, almost a crit. Oh, I did get a crit! Nice! Oh, Karen. Wah wah wah wah! Karen, it's because we trade off. Yeah. And Jadzi is back. [laughs] Let's see. Everyone's going to notice, like I said, the guards are very noticeable. The paladins are acting as guards, anyway. Big double doors open to this place.

It's a fairly large building, but it's not huge. The temple of cord is way bigger than this place. You sort of get the impression that maybe this was not really a focal point for the city. It's not... There maybe wasn't an incredible amount of importance placed on the mayor's office. That type of thing. But this place is... It's kind of deserted on the inside. If you walk past these guards, you can see where there's a large waiting room type area. And there's a desk, probably normally someone there scheduling appointments or that type of thing, kind of making sure that people don't just barge into the mayor's office.

And beyond that, there's going to be a wooden door at the end of this hallway, and that looks to be where the mayor would be. So what would you guys like to do? Is there somebody at the desk? There's no one at the desk right now. But there are paladin's accord floating around, but no one's really questioning who you are or what you're doing. Is there a door anywhere for us to just knock on? There is, certainly. Yeah, knock on the door. Gently knock on the door? Bang bang bang! So, okay, you guys are going to knock on this door. And it is going to swing open, and there's a very large tiefling gentleman on the other side of it.

How tall are the party members here? Just to paint a picture. I believe Irena's the tallest person in this party. Yeah. Okay, how tall would Irena be? I'm four feet tall. Okay. I'm looking, because I say the wrong thing every time. 6'1". Okay. That's pretty damn respectable. Pretty respectable. Definitely the tallest person in this party. Oh yeah. Hilarath is three foot eight. You're welcome. So, this very large, kind of barrel-chested tiefling individual is floating around 6'9". Very, very big guy. Oh god, he's so tall. He's going to fling the door open, and with one hand down around his waist where his sword is, just gripping the hilt, almost expecting there to be someone knocking on the door to fight.

And he's going to be... the first person Kacy's going to meet is Irena. And then he's going to glance down at the rest of the party. And he's going to look back up to Irena. What? I'm such a charmer. I just want to be like, rude. That is an option. That's completely an option. No, no. I don't think Irena would say that. She's just going to look right back at him and just say, "Kraig sent us over here. We've got some information for the new mayor." He's going to narrow his eyes just a bit. And then he's going to just sort of grumble and back away from the door a little bit.

But still, hand still right there on that sword. And he'll let you into the room. As we walk by, I'm going to give him a bit of a stank eye. Okay, is this to a noticeable degree? Like, are you trying to... Um, no. I just... like, that wasn't very nice of him. Oh yes. I think Sora is like, "That wasn't very nice of you. We're just coming here to talk." And so she'll be like, "Gosh, what's his problem?" Okay, as Sora walks by, you can just... Just almost a growl underneath. Ew! He's automatically just disgusted. And he's not going to leave the room. Shh. Damn, son.

Okay. Wow, hostile. Is he like, hanging out by the door? Oh yeah. Like, the door would be closed directly after everyone would file in. And he would just sort of stand... just stand near the door. Like, he's not crowding you and looming over you, but he's definitely going to stay in the room. I'm going to kind of stay near-ish him. If he's still got like, his hand on his waist where his like, sword stuff is. And let them all go into the room, but I'm just going to kind of hang back. Okay. Just like, kind of keep an eye on him. Um, what would Jadzia be doing?

Jadzia would be sitting in her desk, and I'd imagine... It's a pretty sizable desk, like it's the same one that was there when she got there. And it's just like, coated with like, just a collection of like, books, letters, pens kind of scattered about, even. And she was probably either like, writing a letter to someone or reading something, but as soon as they come in, she'll stand up. Hello? Hi, we're here. Craig from the temple sent us over, we have some information for you. Oh, alright. Um, she kind of glances around, and I imagine there's like, two chairs across from the desk, like in pretty much every office ever, but there's a lot more of you.

So she'll kind of look around and be like, I'm sorry, I don't have more seats, but please make yourselves comfortable. And she'll kind of just like gesture to the two seats, whoever wants them can take them, and she'll just stand next to her desk. What was it? Ella has to prop herself right back down on that chair, she's like, well thank you! Leg up on the armrest. Still mind if I do! I just imagine her sitting back like a pimp though, just like, legs spread. What is it called, man spreading? Oh yeah. I do that all day every day. We were on the road, we were on our way, and we saw a dragon flying overhead.

A very large dragon. Jason, did we also see said dragon? You would definitely hear it. Okay, the Esther Holt would be a buzz about any dragon activity given the last month that they've had, and then on top of that, this dragon was not quiet or small. So there would be people who would have seen it out hunting or even just walking if they were to look over the horizon and see it, then yeah, the town would be buzzing about it. But wasn't it heading for that other place first? We just thought it might move on to Esther Holt. Oh it didn't fly over Esther Holt at all.

This would be over the water, so this would be, it was heading south toward Odysseia. But yeah, it's large enough that it could have been spotted, and it definitely would have been heard. Alright then, Judseah will nod, kind of like, "Ah yes, that explains it." We've been able to hear it. I'm not shocked that it was a dragon, though that is very worrisome. Did you catch the color? We did. It was black, but it was really huge. Like, much, much bigger than they're supposed to be. I can't roll any checks, so I don't know if I know that female black dragons are bigger.

Jason, do I know that female dragons are bigger? Well what we could do is bring up your PDF if you'd like. History probably? You could do history, history or nature. History you have a 14, and nature you have a 6. I'll go with history, if that's okay. I, yeah, kind of think. Dang. 27. Yep, you'd know that. Alright. I also vaguely remember killing the last black dragon, so Judseah will look markedly surprised by that information. Oh, alright. Well, that must mean it's female, and it must mean that Calthorne was not the last. Sora's gonna say, "That's not all.

We think that this female black dragon had offspring with a red dragon." Jason, how many red dragons are there? Like, in the world? There are logical conclusions to make here, right? Like, should I even have to roll for that one? Um, no. Probably not, no. Based on size. Based on timing, size, and coloration, I feel like we are all on the same page here now. Yeah, you'd have to be pretty thick not to, uh, yeah. Alright. So, I think we're all reaching the same conclusion here, yes? And she's gonna kinda scan over the party? We will nod. I see him. Mhm. Yes, Sora will nod.

She's looking for Strahd. And she's not going to find him alive. Was the dragon headed that way? It looked like it. Hm. Well. There's probably no chance that we'll be able to hide the body before she finds it, then. And she's going to consider this, and actually, like, she's going to sit down and she's trying to think up, like, some sort of solution to this because that dragon's gonna go on a rampage if something isn't done. Well. Thank you all for bringing this information to me. I'm sorry, I didn't catch any of your names. Oh, uh, Zoya. She'll just hold out her hand to shake.

Judsy will stand back up. Judsy, then she'll shake your hand. Sora's gonna do the same. And Rina will look over and just say, "I'm Rina." But there was another reason we came to see you. Craig was pretty insistent that we let you know we were just in Fair Bay and we encountered some drow. And they wanted us to look in on a few people here in the city. Judsy is going to look over at Valis and meet his eyes for a moment. Oh, he's instantly gonna tense up. Like, he was probably staring at Sora the entire time, just staring daggers into the back of her head.

Listen, Valis. Because in the group, the most dangerous of all. No, no, no. Here's the thing. It has nothing to do with danger. It's like, "What the fuck are you staring at?" More that. And as soon as mentioning drow, it's like, "Oh, shit." Like, yeah, he'll look right at you. We obviously turned them down, but we thought it would be important for you to know. I'm assuming that these drow were looking for me. They didn't give us any names, but his name was Seraph and he was just like, "I'm looking to see if there's a group of people still in that city." And so we told Craig and he's like, "Oh, you need to go tell the mayor." I'm Elorath, by the way.

And she'll wave from the sea. Despite how serious the situation is, Jodzia will kind of smile and nod her head a little bit in that direction. Was it just Seraph? He was the only one we really got a name for, but he was not alone. He had quite a few people with him. There were a lot of drow in Therbe itself as well. And I'm not going to lie, they were very creepy. So creepy. Most drow have a tendency. It's their way. She's going to consider that for a moment and look out the window. Unfortunately, I am one of the people he was having you look into, but he's not going to find the rest.

I should hope. You said he was in Therbe. Yeah, they seem to have set up camp there in the town. They're making everyone really nervous. I'll have to write Seraph. Thank you so much for bringing this to my attention as well. Is there anything I can do for you? Sora's going to pipe up. I do have a question. Yes? Seraph mentioned that the people we were looking for, that they killed drow children. Does that mean you did that? Jodzia is going to lower her eyes and she'll set her hand on the table, almost like she's grounding herself. There was a situation back when I was misinformed.

And then she's going to kind of huff, like that's not the right word, but she can't find it. We were told to go close off the entrance to the tunnel by Overwatch. I didn't know what I was doing. I didn't know about the world very much at the time. And we completed our task. Sorry, Zoya would probably interrupt there. Did you know about the children? Jodzia is going to shake her head. Not until after. Only one of our men heard it in time, and he didn't tell us until after it was done. But at the time, I reasoned it away. She's going to wrap her arms around her stomach.

I was very naive. But I was the one who lit the fuse. I'm not going to try to reason away what I did. But there is someone out there who did know what he was doing. And call me selfish. But I don't want to die for this. She's going to sit back down. I'll have to try to talk to them though, because I do not want this to start another war. I don't think that's so wise of an idea. Other than them being really creepy, they seemed intent on murder. Actually, Jason, I kind of wanted to run a check. Since I did it with the drow, I want to roll insight. Just to see if Jadzi is telling the truth also.

I'm lying, she did it with her bare hands. I didn't have very good insight roll anyway. Yeah, I mean, totally would seem really honest, but some people are really good liars. Zoe's not going to pick up anything to the contrary. It's all going to seem really face value to her. Okay, perfect. Thales would be very uncomfortable with all of this, even the idea of them being allowed into the city. Let alone them coming here. He would pretty much abandon his post at the door and start walking toward the desk. You know they're not going to come here to talk. Jadzi is going to look up at him.

Probably not. But... What I'm trying to do here, and she's going to kind of like motion to all of the papers on the desk. I'm trying to build a better city. I'm trying to build a better world. Even if it doesn't last long, that's... She's going to reach out and take his hand. I can't let that all be for nothing if... Everyone keeps fighting over race and... I don't know what else to do. He'd give your hand a squeeze and he would look up to the party. Is there anything else? I think that was it. It was dragons, dragon babies. And Drow. Yeah, dragons, dragons, babies, and Drow.

No good news whatsoever. We could tell her about Lockford if we wanted to. I was going to say there is something Zoe would probably want to say to them. If what you're saying is true... If you acted without the knowledge... You're still responsible for it. So I really hope that you are able to make a better world. I hope it will make up for it. Judsy will just nod. She can't really respond to that. Thank you again for coming. One more thing. There were a bunch of paladins that came from here. And they went to Lockford to help us out with the situation. You should know that it is taken care of.

And almost everyone is okay. Judsy is going to realize, her eyes are like, "Oh right, you. You are those people." Almost everyone. We had two paladins come help us when we went into the Silver Grid to get rid of the leader. Unfortunately, they didn't make it. Judsy will nod along. More than likely, some of them wouldn't have made it. I'm assuming that Craig knows which two paladins they were. And she's going to look at Irina because I imagine she'd recognize Irina as someone who would be friends with Craig. Like you, big one. Stereotyping, but okay. I'm wearing the same armor that all the rest of them wear.

Rude. I'm more than an armor. I am also a really cool head tattoo. Yeah, that makes me different. I stole this armor. Yeah, so when Jatsu would look over at Irina, she'd just say, "Bray and Zero. They were brave, and they fought well with us, and they will rest now." Judsy will respectively bow her head. "If it's not too much trouble, could you tell me where Brianna went? She was keeping in contact with me until Lockford I'd worried about the worst." She left us before Fair Bay, and she wasn't in a good place. Well, she's gone through a lot recently. Thank you again.

I feel like I'm thanking you so much. Where are you guys headed? We're heading back to Overwatch. Sora and Elrath are with the White Ravens, and we are going so they can get a new mission. Could you... She's gonna kind of think on that for a moment and then look back up. Is there any possibility that you could wait a moment while I write a quick letter and bring it with you? I pay you. Well, you don't need it. We're going there anyway. We'll take your letter. I like the image of all four of you being like, "No! No money!" "Get out!" It's a really nice group of people.

For like the second time too. Oh God. All right, she will sit back down. Very quickly, I'd like to write a letter to Liara. And she'll just pen it out super quick. It's only going to be two or three sentences long, and she'll fold it up, put it in an envelope, wax it up, and just hand it to you. I'm sure if you give this to any of the White Ravens, they'll bring it to her. She'll just hand it to whichever one of you looks like you want a letter real bad. I'll take it. So I will take it and tuck it in her things. Well, thank you all so very much. If you ever need anything, you can ask.

I might still be here and she'll kind of like laugh that off. And she'll go and open the door for you guys. That's so sad. Bellas would not laugh. Sorry we couldn't bring you some better news, Miss Mayor Lady. That's perfectly fine, Bellas. I wish you the best of luck. Good luck to you. I hope you're successful. I think Irina wants to be the last one out. Just kind of hang around a little bit. And then like on the way out the door, she'll just look down at Jatsia. And just because you did bad things in your past doesn't mean you can't make up for them now. And I think you're doing a really good job here.

Don't throw that away on something that's probably not attainable. Jatsia will smile. Thank you. And she'll offer like a hand, like a goodbye handshake. Yeah. Right back at you. And as you leave, like before the door closes all the way, like she's already turning to Bellas. Like it looks like she's going in for a hug as she's closing the door. They're so cute. So you guys have left the mayor's office. You're back in the city of Esterhole. What is the next thing you would like to do? I would say after talking to Craig, after talking to Jatsia, you might want to stay the night unless you think time is of the essence.

And you're anxious to get back out there. Because it's getting later. Does that mean we have to go back to the temple? You don't have to. There's plenty of inns and stuff like that. Yeah, we totally said goodbye this morning, but you know, bye again. I mean it's not super late, late. It's just, it's, you know, it'll be getting on Sunset in a couple of hours somewhere in there. I mean, it all depends. Are you guys comfortable with camping? I mean it's going to take us more than a day to get to Overwatch. Anyways, at some point we're going to have to cancel, to cancel, yeah, to camp.

To cancel. Yeah, we're going to cancel our lives and camp. I will turn this caravan around. I'm not going to re-up my subscription to life. Thank you very much. I have found an alternative subscription. Take me off your mailing list. Okay, well, quick question here. I got a couple of different scenarios to propose to you guys. Now, being as how you're in Esterhold, there are a few different ways you can get to the city of Overwatch. Now traditionally during war times it was much more difficult to get there, being as how there were checkpoints. And there were lots of stuff there to make it more difficult to either get to or from the city, unless you were authorized.

That's no longer a problem. Now, you could head south from Esterhold and wrap your way... I'm sorry, keep going. You could wrap your way around the Blackrock Mountains and move south through the city of Odysseus and then up again, moving north, and then you'd make it to Overwatch. That is... Jeez, that would probably take you three or four days to get there. If you were to head north from Esterhold, though, and take the road up, there will be a fork, one leading to Durn Hollow, the other way leading to Overwatch. That'll probably take you a solid three days, but that would involve you going...

There's a mountain pass between Blackrock and the Blistering Peaks, which I'll have you guys roll a check to see if any of you would know anything about. And the third option would be going straight through the Blackrock Mountains. That would involve a little bit of mountain climbing, that would involve some rougher terrain, but you'd shave some time off as long as none of you were injured or had a really hard time climbing. That would probably take you the better part of two days. So it all depends on what you guys would like to do. I don't know that I'm a mountain climber.

I think the best would be to go north. You think so too. How long would it take us to get to that fork in the road, time-wise? I see that this fork is conveniently located next to Betrayal Ridge, and that does not sound very inviting. Wow, okay. Well, certain things... No, no, no, no. I don't want to be camping. My Betrayal Ridge. Well, the ridge actually gets its name. You know what? Everyone do me a favor and you can either roll a history or nature check and I'll give you some more info on the three paths. History! Nature, let's go, come on. Damn it, I should have just had to restart!

Wow. Yay, Sora! Alright, so not a... Okay, one person wrote history. Okay, Arena... Oh, geez, never mind. Arena... Rude. Sorry, Arena knows that there's... It's more of a history item about that ridge. It got its name from a long time ago. She doesn't exactly remember what for. There was someone trying to teach her... I haven't read about it yet. No, it's... Yeah. Nature-wise, here are the things you might want to look out for if you're traveling. One, if you were to travel south, there's the matter of a dragon that is still floating around in the last you heard that it seems like Odysseia is its next target.

And being around it when it finds out that it's... If that's what it was looking for, Strahd, it is dead, that might not go well. So maybe south is out, although you may be so insignificant and small that this dragon wouldn't pay you any mind. So there's that. Hey, hey, hey, who you calling small? Compared to a dragon. Not small in spirit. We are merely appetizers for a larger course. Not even. We're like toothpicks. Here's the other thing. I'm going to spish. [laughter] Heading south is the least dangerous path in terms of wildlife, aside from the dragon.

Heading north, any path that takes you through the mountains, you're going to have to deal with things like drakes. Drakes are a big deal. Right around the Blackrock Mountains specifically, drakes have a long and storied history of attacking travelers and mountain climbers and explorers. If you're heading anywhere near the forests located near mountains, you're going to have to deal with things like hill giants, maybe the occasional trolls, something like that. And if you're heading through mountain passes themselves, you would know that goblins are a problem.

Now, a goblin, any one of you could take out a goblin. They are relatively small, gangly creatures. The problem is you will very, very rarely face a goblin. You will face a throng of goblins. And that is when things get dangerous. They will swarm and attack. Could we call it a gaggle of goblins? A gaggle of goblins would be pretty damn appropriate. In the barn, was that goblins or gnolls? Cobalt. Cobalt. Cobalt! Okay, okay. Well, okay. If you had to compare goblins to another creature in Theria, think a much more vicious, cutthroat, dangerous version of cobalt.

Goblins are mostly subterranean, but if prodded, they will attack things near mountain passes and things like that. Usually something that provides shade. So in between mountain passes, you will sometimes encounter them. They'll come up from holes and before you know it, they'll just be all over you. So, what you guys thinking? Which way of the three paths do you want to take? Is that three days on horseback? Because we have horses. Yes, it's three days on horseback mostly because you're going to have to slow down the northern routes. If you're going through the mountains, it's going to be really difficult to get a horse through there.

But if you're taking the northern route that's just a road, you're going to have to slow down at a certain point just because the path gets really narrow and rocky. Kind of rough terrain. Horses can take it, but you just got to be slow. You're not going to be galloping through that. It's just a little bit slower. The southern path is a wide open road you guys can take. The only reason it's going to take you around four days is because it's just a longer route. But it's safer, relatively. And also there will be dragons. Just one? Just a dragon? I still say north.

I'm okay with north. Yeah. Memory serves you guys have two horses, correct? Yes. Alright. Just taking mental notes here. I'm here in north? Yeah. Alright. I'm so excited. You guys. Before we head out, can I find a child? Oh my gosh. I mean, one of those? No. I'm just going to go to the orphanage. We all went to a different place for that. I was surprised at how many different places I went. Are you one of the orphanage children and asked them to deliver a letter for me? Oh yeah. There's no shortage of orphans in Esterholt. Yeah. I just want them to deliver a letter to Lyn for me.

Absolutely. Yeah. That would not be a problem at all. Thank you. I'll give them a little piece of gold. Have lunch on me. Aww. Yeah, the orphan situation in Esterholt is interesting. There are actual nice orphanages in Esterholt. It's a place where a lot of kids either get dropped off or they kind of get scooped up from neighboring towns and cities that just don't have any place to keep these kids. So Esterholt just becomes this hive for unwanted children. And there's so many that the odds of all of them getting adopted are staggeringly slim. A lot of them will just grow up in the system until they're old enough to take care of themselves and then probably either go be adventurers or open a shop, something like that if they've managed to learn a skill or trade.

Theria doesn't strike me as a place where a lot of people adopt. Like, at all. You'd be surprised. I mean, there are a lot of... You need people to work on the farm. Well, I mean, okay. Yes. Enchants, servants. Okay, in certain towns and cities there is a long history of orphans being adopted for work purposes. And they do get sort of abused that way, but not in Esterholt. They're actually pretty well taken care of in the city because they have enough money to do that. Let's not focus on the negative, guys. You guys know what comes next. Who wants to be the one to roll me a flat d20?

It will not be me. I put my finger on my nose. I'll do it. Yay! Fuck you, kid. We take that back. Let's see. Oh, okay. Well, I mean, I ain't mad though. Is it a nice day? Depends on your definition. There is a hurricane a-blowing in. I remember when Bree was like, "Be careful!" There are no tornadoes, so it is a nice day. Oh, God. Oh, bother. -Yeah, stop off, Eterra. -Yeah, roll the d20. Oh, fuck. You guys are gonna start to take this path north. And really, you know, black rain clouds are gonna start to settle in. And it looks like you guys are gonna be in for a cold, wet night.

And the further you ride north, the worse that's going to appear to be. Now, after, I would say, about five or six hours, you're gonna start to reach the thinner passes of these mountains here. And it's almost completely single file up this path. And you're gonna go up this really winding mountain pass for about 30 minutes. Everyone in the party, do me a favor and either roll Perception or Dungeoneering. -Hey, that's not bad. -Nope! -Wow. -When I have the high Perception roll, that's not good. Yeah, we may have some problems here. Let me bring up a map for everyone.

There's gonna be traps in the ground. We're gonna be ambushed by angry goblins. They're goblins that have mated with the big black dragon, so... -So what do you guys think my next character should be? -Droblins. Should I... -Can I play a dragon? -What class haven't I done yet? Oh, god. Bard? Never been a bard. I don't wanna be a bard. I'll be a bard. That way I can justify me singing all the time. Like you justify it now? Well, I only do it in my head now. Oh, okay. -That's never a good noise. -Okay, Valus. I'm looking for things. Valus has been behind us the whole time.

-I can't do that. -That was Yoda. -What? What is that? -I can't do that. Low grumble. You guys are traveling through these mountains and what you're doing is you were heading north. So you've come from that southern portion. And what is going to happen is... You guys are going to get to a bend in the road here and again... North would lead to your destination. But there is an area that sort of tapers off and goes straight. Now... Zoya... Zoya is going to spot... Something up ahead on the pass. And what it looks like... Is something moving in a bush. Can't quite tell if it's an animal or a person or what it is.

But there is definitely something just very, very, very subtly moving in the bush. Zoya will point it out to Erina. And Erina will just slow down the horses. Probably actually bring it to stop. And hold out her arm for Ellora to stop their horse too. She will. What is it? It moves. I can't tell what it is. Alright. Gonna get down from the horse. Regretting it already. Or should we stay on the horse so we can bolt out of it? Can we nature check? Since we did see it. Or at least I did. Well, I mean... You saw something moving. A nature check wouldn't really... All it would do is give you a rundown of things that it could be.

Shit. Okay. Did Erina see anything? Because she did a dungeoneering. Uhh... Nope. Cool. So the bush is in our way though, right? We'd have to go past it anyways? It's right around the bend here. You could take it really really tight and just avoid it altogether. This would be several spaces in front of you. Like if I had to give you a marker? Like... Oh, and we're going in that direction. Sorry, I thought we were... I don't get it. Why are we going south? Aren't we supposed to be going north? You are heading north. Oh, then why don't we just take a wide... Or like a tight turn there.

You absolutely can. Let's do that. Sounds like a bad idea. You're so defeatist. Come on, Karen's died a lot. I know. And dude, would I do that again to you, Karen? Yes. Because you are unbiased and you will do what you have to do to tell a story. Okay, you saved it at the end there. Thank you. You're welcome. You guys are going to move forward and take this corner kind of tight so you're avoiding that whole bush area. Avoid the bush. It's an ambush. Alarath and Sora are riding together, right? Yeah. Alright, here's what's going to happen. You guys are going to move about 15 feet further from where you are right now.

What's going to happen here is... Let's roll a little thing. Missed. I'm not aiming for you. Aw, damn it. It's the horse. No, no, no! The very second... Remember what he said, you guys have two horses, right? The very second you cross a certain point in the road, the ground itself is going to fall away from you and your horse is going to make an ungodly noise as the three of you tumble into a deep hole. About 10 feet deep. At the bottom of it, as soon as you guys hit, it's going to be a really jarring landing. Here's the good news. The horse is going to be impaled on a set of spikes at the base of this hole.

What the fuck? Does this count as cruelty to animals? Absolutely. Sorry, Peta. Let's see how much damage gets done to the horse. Oof. Can I heal the horse? If you drag it out of the hole, that'll almost be enough to kill the horse, but not quite. You guys have... Oh no. That's awful. This is going to make me sad. I'm going to start crying. Well, there are other problems. I would imagine that as you guys move forward, I would imagine that Arena and Zoya would be right about there. Am I correct? If we say no, do we survive? Yeah, we'd be pretty close. Alright. The second that those two tumble into this hole...

And again, the horse broke your fall, thankfully. And there is blood and everything. It's very, very awful. This horse is going to continue to make an ungodly screeching sound as the storm clouds above you are letting loose with some nasty thunder. And the first bits of rainfall are going to hit you as several figures leap out of bushes and behind rocks. And what it appears to be is a trap set by Nuval Slavers. What? The fuck? So I'm going to ask everybody in the party to please roll initiative. Oh, fuck. Those motherfuckers. I hope you know I'm crying, Jason.

I'm sorry. I got a crit. It's been so long since I've rolled initiative, I couldn't find it. I'm going last. Awesome. Nope. Oh god, it totally makes sense for her to go last too. Fuck. Cool. You're in a hole. Punch him in the dick. Punch the hole. Now I do have combat advantage. How? From inside the hole? Well, just, no, because on the first turn in combat I get combat advantage. Right, but you're in a hole. Yeah, but, um. Unless you were to put the horse out of its misery. Oh my god, Jason, don't make, I, Jason, I'm already crying. Here are your options. Getting out of that hole is probably a good thing for you to do.

That's going to require an athletics check. Because you don't have any other way that you could get out of that hole. Now, it's just, it's just pretty much a hole, so it's a fairly low athletics check if it makes you feel better. It doesn't. Question. Yes. What if I do like the basket with my hands, right? And she readies an arrow in her hands. And I'm like, alright. And I like, we like throw her into the air and she's like, pew pew! And then jumps out of the hole. I mean, I think that's very plausible, Jason. If Elrath wants to give up her turn to give Sorin advantage, I'll allow that.

Oh no, no, Elrath, if you die because in this fight I'm going to be so sad. You need to, you're squishy! We need to get you out of the hole! Pull yourself together! Pull yourself together, Pamela pig! Um, alright. Yeah, no, I feel like she'd be like, alright. Like, cause, well, I mean, you'd probably be really good at climbing, though. I'm good at acrobatics. Not athletics. No, but I consider climbing acrobatics, but, you know, whatever. No, yeah, she probably would then. She'd probably just like look and then realize, cause I think she's remembering that whole tree thing.

When we had to jump across the river and it's like, no, no, let me. So, she'll probably make a basket with her foot. Or, not her feet. Her hands. Just like, alright. Oh, okay. Um, I don't know if I can fire an arrow, though. Well, here's the thing. Normally, a check like that would just be your turn. Since Elorath is being kind enough to give up her turn for this round, not only are you going to get an assist to your athletics check, um, you're going to be able to make an attack roll after you leave. As long as it isn't an abysmal roll. Um, but you're going to get a plus two to the roll.

Right. Cool. Okay. Um, well, I guess we should do the athletics check first, then. I think so. To see if that even happens. Oh, oh, since this is happening, you can either do athletics or acrobatics. Pick that. I can! Yes. Because this is literally like a jumping boost type thing, I will allow it. Fuck yes. Okay. Now I'm ready. Twenty four. Okay. Standing on your horse and avoiding these, avoiding these spikes here. The spikes are kind of spaced out enough that you guys can find your footing now and you're not. You can. I would imagine you get off the horse really quickly.

That isn't going to stop this horse from thrashing. But, uh, Elorath is going to ready her hands in that basket shape. So we're going to run forward here in the space that you have allowed. And Elorath is going to give Sora a boost. Sora is going to clear the hole and make it up to 10 feet and be right here. Sora, go ahead. Take the rest of your turn. Okay. Um, I think I'll go for Nuval Slaver one. Like, does it have to be just like a ranged basic attack or can I like? It's your turn. Whatever you want to do. Okay, cool. So we will put Hunter's Quarry on the Nuval Slaver one and I'm going to use careful attack.

Well, that is going to miss. Oh, oh, when I miss, I can do a ranged basic attack within five squares of an enemy. Of the original target. So you have to pick a new target? Yeah. Okay. Um, let's do human thug six. Okay. So, take off you. There. And, yeah. So, a ranged basic, right? Okay. Yep. Uh, that, that is a crit miss. Mm-hmm. Um, well, I'm going to move and, but I have, um, if I have an opportunity attack, I get plus four AC. Okay. So hopefully that'll help. All right. Uh, Nuval Slaver is going to get, does a 21 hit your AC with a plus four? Nope. Okay. Then be about your way.

Um, and that'll wrap you up? Yes. Uh, human thug number five. Oh boy. Human thug number five. One, two, three, four, five, six is going to move right up to arena. Target arena. And then try to use his club against her. That is almost a crit. Uh, that'll be seven damage to arena. Minus one, because I have resistance. Uh, one, two, three, four, five. Nuval Slavemaster is going to move down here and end its turn. Nuval Slaver number one. Nuval Slaver number one is not done with Sora. And we'll move right here and target Sora. And going to try something called Thump and Lash.

And what he has is this kind of cat of nine tails type of thing. Picture, picture lots of whips tied to what would be the base of a normal whip. And he is going to try and thump her with the base of that and then lash at her with it. So let's see if that'll, let's see if that'll, that is going to hit. Uh, no it's not. It's not going to? We're not going to do that. Um. Okay, I'm going to do yield ground. So I can shift a number of squares equal to my wisdom modifier and gain a plus two power bonus to all defenses until the end of your next turn. I believe you still take the damage as a result though.

Yes. Okay. Uh, so you're going to take this damage first. Oh, so that is eleven damage and you get a negative two penalty to melee attack rolls until the end of your next turn. Well that's fine. Yeah, and then you can, okay, and go ahead and move. Right, so I can move two spaces. Stupid human thug. Two, let's go here. Alright, so right behind, right behind, uh, Irina and Zoya and their horse. Um, and that'll bring up human thug number one. One, let's see here. Two, he's going to position himself up there and end his turn. And Elorath, uh, we're going to skip Elorath's turn because of what she, she, she did to help out Sora.

Uh, slaver number two. Two, going to position himself right there and end his turn. Human thug number four. Going to fan out right here and end. And number two. Uh, and that'll bring up human thug number six who is going to move right up to Irina. Uh, target Irina. Try to club and that will hit. Uh, seven damage to Irina. And that'll bring up Zoya. I am going to cast Curse of Misfortune. And that targets, it's a close burst three, targets each enemy in the burst. Uh, whenever the target makes an attack roll, it rolls twice and uses the lower result. Save ends.

After effect, the target takes ten psychic damage. Miss, the target takes ten psychic damage. Shit. Is that a daily? Yes. Wow, okay. Been holding on to that. Alright. Because these dudes, there's a lot of them. There are a lot of them. Alright, you're going to crit mislaver one, you're going to hit thug three, miss thug five, you are going to hit thug six, and miss thug two. So Zoya's going to cast this spell and what do you think it would look like? Oh, the Curse of Misfortune. So it is just going to create this giant, swirling swarm of really mad bees. We're going to go, they're going to hunt these assholes down.

They're going to sting them and make them really miserable. Okay. Well, so thoroughly are some of these guys going to be stunned. Like, let's say, human thug number five. He's going to crumble behind this rock and die. Let me see. Human thug number three is going to do the same thing, drop dead. Five is actually going to fall back down the mountain. Like, just lose balance and just tumble ass over end down this mountain and meet an unfortunate, untimely death. Human, let me see, thug number six is also going to suffer that fate. Human thug number two is going to die as well.

And slaver number one is going to take ten damage. So that is a good use of a daily. Yay! I give it an A, Kira. Question. Could Elorath have seen those bees? This is important to her character. Definitely here, though. It was really big swarm and it is covering the hole, so Elorath would totally have seen the bees. It's like the opening of Twister, man. You know, in the cellar. Yep. Uh, Arena, your turn. Okay, I have a question. Getting off the horse, does that take my movement? You were already off the horse. I was? Oh. Oh, no, you guys moved on. That's right. Yeah, we moved on.

I would count that as like, we don't count sheathing and unsheathing a weapon as an action, so I would say just sliding off the horse wouldn't be your movement, no. Okay, cool. Then I'm going to move... One, two, three, four, five, six. Right after that guy. Right after you've all master slaver. Asshole. This guy is like, like larger, clearly in charge, larger than everyone else. Mm-hmm. And I'm going... I'm getting a little sassy there. Can you make me, because I do not do it right every time, a three, a close burst three. Close burst three? Yeah. Sure can. Kira, does this persist at all?

It doesn't persist, but the one that I hit, if any of them had survived, they would have had to reroll and take their lower roll, but none of them did. Right, none of them did. So let's just use this one. Where do you want it? Okay, cool. Well, I think because it's a burst, it has to come out from me, correct? Unless it's a spell, like, yeah. Yeah, yeah. Okay. So I'm going to use my hollered circle, so a bunch of bright lights and stuff on the ground is going to come out from around me, and it's going to hit every enemy in the burst. And until the end of the encounter, if my allies are inside of the burst, they gain a plus one power bonus to all defenses.

And then so I will tug it. That jerk, that jerk, and that jerk. And... All right. Aw. So you're going to hit the master slaver, you're going to hit the new valslaver too, you're going to miss, you're going to roll a crit miss on human thug number four. I don't care. Whatever. Okay. There's damage for them. Thirteen damage. And then I will undo them, and I'll give myself and Elorath for right now the plus one, and if anybody comes into the zone, they will get a plus one. Okay. Sora, your turn. I'm going to use evasive strike, and basically I can shift a number of squares equal to one plus my wisdom modifier either before or after the attack.

And then I also have a thing where I can, I get to move, so if I move two or more spaces with a standard action attack, which is what that is, I get plus one to my attack roll. Go for the new valslaver. And he still has Hunter's Quarry on him. Okay. That'll hit. Yeah. Okay. So now, it is this damage, and this damage. Nice. Anything else? That is it. Okay. New val master slaver is going to try and take this big spear he's carrying, and he's going to try and jam it in arena. Fucking bring it. Oh. That's a crit. Okay. Okay. That is 20. 19 please. 19. And he's going to try and move away one space.

Mm-hmm. He's going to try and move back a space here. So do I get to attack on one? It's just a shift. He's just shifting back one. Oh yeah, that's right. Sorry. I forgot the rules for a second. That's okay. He's just repositioning. He's just getting his footing. I just really want to punch him. I know. I can feel it. I can feel it coming off of you. New valslaver one is sick of sore as shit. And he... let's see here. What is he going to use? What is he going to use? He is going to move forward and he has this trident looking thing. And what he's going to try and do is jam it in Sora's foot.

Okay, well before he does that, I'm going to move. I have a thing called weave through the fray. It's an immediate interrupt. When an enemy moves adjacent to me, I can shift two squares. So, uh, let's go one, two, and now I'm in the thing. Alright. Well, that puts a damper on his plan. So, hmm. That'll end his turn actually. Uh, human thug number one sees that his friends are in trouble. He might have to help. One, two, three, four, five. Yep. One, two, three, four, five. Right here, going to target Zoya and try and club her. That'll miss. LRF, your turn! Okay. Zoya's very lucky.

Okay, so I have a couple questions because I know what I'd like to do. Okay, hit me. I've had a little bit of time to think about it. Okay. Okay, so the athletics check to climb out of the hole. Yes. Will that be my standard action? Yes. So I could climb out of the hole and then I would, in theory, have a movement left? Yes. Okay. And an action point. And, oh, I forget about that. And a minor. Okay. Well, I don't know. I'll hold onto the minor for just now. Okay, so I guess the first thing to do would then be to make the athletics check? Yes. Climb out of the hole.

Yep. Okay, so just athletics. Okay, come on. Sweet. Dice. That'll do it. Okay. Alarith will claw and climb out of this hole. Okay. Where does that put me? Right there. Okay. My next question. Charging is a movement, right? It's actually part of an attack if you charge a melee basic at the end of it. Right. That's what I was wondering. But I mean, like, you use it as part of your movement, not a standard. Okay. She's going to charge then. And she's going to charge right. Oh, God. Where? She wouldn't be thinking clearly. So she's going to go fucking right here. Almost in between the master slaver and human thug four.

But she just wants to get there. And she's going to do a melee basic attack on human thug number four. All right. Powers. Doo doo doo doo. Maybe. Oh, there it is. Melee basic attack. Yes. Let me ask you a question. Would LRF be caring about their safety or wellbeing at all? No. Okay. She's going to swing her flail and cave in the skull of this guy. Good. Can she use the momentum to then wing around and attack master slaver with an action point? Oh, yes. Yeah. If you're using an action point, absolutely. Yes. Go. Action point. Okay. Then to do that, she will. Okay. Using the momentum from caving his skull in, she will then round about on new ball master slaver and she will use one of her dailies.

I believe. We're going to do target is not. Oh, oh, no, he's not. He's not bloodied. I got really excited for a second. Actually, I think she's just going to do an encounter. Okay. She's going to try great shout. Yes. Yes, she is. She's going to do great shout. Excuse me. Okay. The target. A great shout. Here we go. Boom. Okay. That is a crit miss, sadly. Crit miss. Well, in her mind, she was very bad ass doing that. This slavery is not intimidated by that display. I just caved in. It's fucking. All right. Slaver number two is going to close in behind arena and try to use his slavers.

He's got this trident. Same kind of thing that the other one was using against the other one. He's going to try to stab at the back of arenas heel, like rain the Achilles tendon. So let's see if that works. No, that is no. That was weak sauce and will not. Should I break dance for that? Can't touch this. Zoya, your turn. All right. So I am going to use an encounter power. This is a close blast three. Does Avandra have any particular symbol or symbols in Theria? Yeah, actually every god has an emblem like a symbol. What would it be? Because I'm going to be casting shining symbol on these two.

Actually, you know what I should do? I should draw the symbol. Actually, you know what I should do? I should draw them all up. My artistry is balls, but I could draw them all up and kind of maybe put them somewhere that people could see them, at least get a rendition of them. Yeah, we could do that. All right. So this targets each enemy in the blast. The attack is my highest ability modifier versus will. If I hit, it does 1d8 plus 5 damage and the target takes a negative 2 penalty to attack rolls until the end of my next turn. Okay, so it hits him. It is going to create a radiant symbol of Avandra and just smack him right in the chest.

That will kill him. Oh. Well, fuck you then, dude. Anything else? That should be it for now. All right. Rina. Okay. I'm going to shift over here, get back in this asshole's face. I'm doing that. I'm going to use a Lay on Hands on myself. All right. So that didn't give me anything. So that's cool. Okay. It's okay. It's just a healing surge, correct? Yes. Okay. There. There we go. Sweet. Oh, shoot. I closed up my thing on accident. Okay. And then, so I'm in his face. I'm going to use my Resurgence Smite. Okay. And so target him. That'll hit. Nice. Ooh, 11 damage to the master slave.

Oh, but I'm not done. Action point. Here, let me check off all my stuff here. One second. Action point. And I'm going to use my Paladins Judgment against him too. I really don't. Oh. That one's going to miss. No. I don't have anything to reroll that. Fine. Whatever. That'll bring up Sora. I will do Twin Strike against Nuval Slaver 1 and Nuval Slaver 2. Okay. And the Hunter's Quarry is on number 1. Okay. That'll hit both of them. Perfect. So they each get one weapon damage and then number 1 also gets Hunter's Quarry. Oof. Another 8 damage. Okay. That is, yeah. Anything else?

Um, no, that'll be it. Uh, so, okay, Master Slaver's turn. He's tired of you uppity future slaves giving him shit. Hmm. Is he sure he doesn't want to give up? Pretty sure. Pretty sure he doesn't want to give up. Here's, hmm. Oh boy. He is going to back up one space. And he is going to use a Sleep Powder Flask. No. He's going to target- What the shit? He's going to target Erina and he's going to target Elorath. Ugh. Okay. Bullshit! What the fuck? Bullshit! Okay. That is a crit. Wait, wait. Wait, wait. Oh wait, nevermind, that's a crit. Oh wait, nevermind, that's not a da- Okay, I'm going to use an Immediate Interrupt, Snarling Defiance.

It just says I take half damage from the attack. Then gain a +2 power attack roll, but it probably won't help because I'll probably be asleep. What, are you just really groggy instead of asleep? Um, this is the way it works actually. There's no damage associated with this attack. Oh, okay, well then maybe not. What's going to happen is, you, let's see. Boop, let's, did that work correctly? Let's see. Oh, I am unconscious. You're not unconscious yet. What happens is, you are slowed. Your slowed save ends. The problem is, the first time that you get a failed saving throw, then you go unconscious.

And then you start rolling save checks to get out of that. So this lethargic feeling is going to come over both of you. And that's not great. He is going to pop an action point. And he is going to throw a razor net at you guys. What it is, is a net that is kind of, picture it made out of like a more pliable barbed wire type of thing. So the more you struggle against it, the more it hurts. That's the idea behind it. So he is going to target, Erina and Elorath. He is going to target, and he is going to miss Erina, but hit Elorath. No, second chance. I want you to reroll that one and you cannot, you have a negative five penalty and you cannot crit.

Ooh, okay. Let's do that again then. What the fuck? Is that with a negative five? Yes. Oh my god. Oh, I rolled a 19. That's the only reason. I feel really bad. So here's what's going to happen with that. The barbed net, it's going to do 16 damage to Elorath and the target is restrained with ongoing 10 damage. So you are slowed and restrained. Save ends both of those. You're going to be rolling a lot of saving throws on your next turn. You're not dead. No one's dead yet. But that is a wrinkle. New Ball Slaver 1 is so tired of Sora. So tired, guys. But he's on his last legs.

He is going to stagger forward and close the gap between him and Sora. And he's going to raise that trident up and he is going to try and jam it into Sora's ankle. That is a crit. Well, second chance. Okay. Negative five? I don't think so. Is that like a thing that you took? Yeah, I have Nimble Dodge. Second chance gets negative five penalty and enemy cannot crit. It's a defeat. So I just have to roll it over again. Okay. Yeah. Well, it's not a crit. True. That's true. It's not a crit. That is going to do 31 damage to Sora. And let's see. You are immobilized and take a negative two penalty to melee attack rolls.

Until the end of your next turn. Okay. What does immobilize mean? Immobilize means you can't move. And that's it? That's it. Okay. Good lord. Okay. That's going to bring up, that's going to bring up Elorath. All right. So I guess it's time for saving throws. Yeah, because you're restrained. So I can't attack or do anything. You grant combat advantage. You can't move or be moved and you get a negative two to attacks. Yeah. Okay. So here's what we're going to do. Let's first roll the saving throw for the sleep powder. Okay. Do I still take 10 ongoing damage if I am asleep and not actively fighting against the wizard?

I believe so, just because it's supposed to, like, it's still, oh man. Important question is important. Okay. So it's, that's just a flat D20, correct? Yes. Okay. All right. Here we go. I don't want to be unconscious. That's the last thing. So you don't, you don't want that. And I want higher than a 10, correct? You want a 10 or higher? Yeah. Oh, it didn't roll damage. Just sitting there on the table. Okay. Okay. You are no longer slowed. Now we need to. Okay. So holy Lord. Okay. Let's dig into your effects here because you got a bunch. So you saved against that. That is great.

You're still restrained. Okay. So you need to, you need to roll a save for that one. Okay. Wait. Oh wait. No. Nevermind. Yeah. Okay. Still restrained. Yeah. And you're going to take another 10 damage. For trying to get out of it? For trying to get out of it, but you're not unconscious. Let's see. New Volslaver 2. Oh, good. The, the, the thing recharged for me. Okay. Cool. Slaver 2 is going to move right down here next to arena. Target arena. And he's going to try and use that. He's going to try and use that trident thing again. Okay. Okay. No, you know what? He's going to thump and lash.

He's going to try and whip arena. Oh, okay. Cool. I'm rolling too well tonight. I'm kind of feeling bad about that. It's okay. Sorry. Ah, that is going to do 22 damage and bloody arena. And you're going to get a negative two penalty to melee attack rolls until the end of your next turn. Okay. Um, can you take one hit point off that? I surely can for you. Thank you. I feel like a broken record. No, not at all. Um, and that'll bring up Zoya. So what I'm going to be casting then is hymn of resurgent that targets each enemy in the blast. It is wisdom versus fortitude.

The target takes a negative two penalty to all defenses until the end of my next turn. And when any ally hits the target before the end of my turn, the target is knocked prone. And then the effect each ally in the burst can choose either to gain five temporary hit points or to make a saving throw. Okay. Hey, all. Okay. So I would assume for the attack, I want to just target the two bad guys and not my allies. That would be a good plan. You're going to hit both of them. And I totally got a crit. You're going to crit the slaver one. Poor slaver one. He's been getting beat up, guys.

Fuck that guy. He's a slaver. Zoya doesn't like slavers. Not many people do. So they should get damage, which I suppose I better roll, and they'd take that negative two defense. Oh no, they just take the negative two defense. Oh, that's all they get? Okay, cool. But the allies, though, will knock him prone if they hit either of them before my next turn. And remember, everyone in the burst, so that's all three of you guys, can gain five temporary hit points or make a saving throw. Alarath, I'm going to guess that you want to make a saving throw. I mean, yeah.

Hit it. It has a little red cross there, so I assume that should be the... Motherfucker. Wow. Everyone. Unless Alarath wants to do a saving throw, then I think she doesn't get the hit points. Yeah, she doesn't get the hit points. Oh, whoops. I'm sorry, I already targeted her. I already got it. Done. Thank you. No problem. You'd think that she'd be better able to get out of nets, being that she is from Ebony Harbor. I...that is a malkus grimness level of struggling with this net. That is a one. What? Oh, I forgot about that. It makes it a little bit better. Alarina!

I have a question. Okay. If one of my powers says no action, that means it's a free action. Which power? Incredible toughness, because it's technically a feat. Incredible toughness, no action trigger, you start your turn, you end...any ongoing damage? Oh, Jesus, no, that's just because you're a mole. Okay. That's your "fuck you, I'm a mole" power. Well, I imagine that maybe Alarina might have had some experience with this fucking sleep powder. Oh, yeah. It doesn't matter. And whipping. And whipping, and all this shit. There is no button for me to press to clear everything, so if you could just do that for me.

I'm on it. That'd be great. Um, fuck all of that. You're good. Fuck all of that. Thank you. I'm also going to use the free action on my armor to give myself a healing surge. Okay. So there's that. So Alarina's hulking up right now. And I have, as a minor action, I'm going to use divine metal, which allows a target to make a saving throw with a bonus equal to my charisma modifier. So, Alarath, you may use, or you may do another saving throw with a +3 bonus. Holy shit. Dear sweet tuxedo shirt wearing baby shoes. Oh, sorry, I'm trying. Okay, so +3. +3. Do it. Come on, D20.

Let's go. Motherfucker. Nope. Oh, 12. Yes, that'll do it. That'll do it. You are no longer netted. I was about to poop myself, and that didn't work. Okay, and I still have a movement, so I'm going to get back in this motherfucker's face. And I still have an action. So, Dazzling Flare. That is a crit. I'm so happy. Okay. Take that damage. 27 damage. There's a status thing with it too. And he's knocked prone too. Oh, okay. He's knocked prone. Oh, because of your thing? Yes. Anyone he hit before the end of my next turn, they're knocked prone. Oh, because I was in the first turn.

Oh, no, he's outside of that burst. Oh, no, he's outside my burst. Whoops. Okay, but he does take a -2 penalty to attack rolls until the end of my next turn. Alright, hit him with a... Got you. Well, shit. That felt so good, guys. Sora, your turn. I don't want to be that guy, but does he have anything for getting bloody? Oh, the Slave Master. You're right. As a result of being bloodied... I'm honest. Just kidding. I love you. As a result of being bloodied, he is going to stab at arena twice, but he will take the negative penalty. So, let's see here... Oh, not. Sorry.

You. Hell, you targeted both of those. Uh, 24. Um, I think that misses. We'll just count those as two separate things. So, 24. He'll miss both times. Yeah! Sora, your turn. Okay. I'm going to get this little motherfucker. Okay. I'm going to shift back one. Um, Hunter's Quarry, blah, blah, blah. I'm going to do a careful attack because he's almost dead anyway. That'll hit. Yay! So, damage. That'll kill him. Well, damage. And one more. Just like a little other poke. So, he is going to fall to the ground and then you're going to shove another arrow in him. Yeah, just for fun.

Just stay down. Yeah, that'll kill him. Slaver one is dead. The only two left on the field is Slave Master and Slaver Two. Um, you know what? Do they want to give up yet? At this point, I feel like they're fighting for their lives. Let's fucking action point. I mean, the Master Slaver definitely is, so. I'm going to do... Hmm. Let's do... Cool. Let's do Split the Tree. I fire two arrows at once, which separate in mid-flight to strike two different targets. So, this one and this one. Actually, this is the funny one. Okay, so I make two attack rolls, take the higher result, and then apply it to both targets.

So, this is going to be the attack roll. Fuck! You know what? I hate everything. You get another one. Go ahead. Oh, yes! That's right! Oh my gosh! I forgot about that. Hmm. Well, I'm assuming that didn't hit. No. Seventeen's going to miss everything. Yeah. Uh... Yeah. Okay. So, that didn't work. Um... Then, that's it, because I also did my action point. Uh... New Vols Slave Master. Ooh, the Barb Net is recharged. Okay. No. You know what he's going to do? He's going to try and reach out. And he's going to try and grab Arena by the Throat. Oh, no you didn't. A fourteen versus your reflex.

Uh... Hold on. I don't know that one off the top of my head. Eighteen. Eighteen. Yeah. That is going to miss. So, he's just going to kind of like try and grab, and he's just going to get like, like kind of a feeble grip, but not really get... You can definitely tell what he's going for. Mm-hmm. Um... Elorath, your turn. She's going to use Feral Rampage. Um... Yes. Sorry. Feral Rampage. Um... It is a daily. And she's going to roll... Uh, that'll hit Slaver Two. Okay. But I... Let's untarget myself. There we go. Boom. Okay. So... Alright. So, let's do the damage for that Feral Rampage.

Jesus Christ! [Laughter] Okay. That kills... Yeah, that'll kill Slaver Two a lot. Okay. Well, the effect of Feral Rampage is I can shift up to my speed after the first attack. And you can attack one or two creatures. Yeah. Alright. So... Yes. I can take a guess at what you're going to do. So, she's going to shift beep, beep, beep, beep. So, she's flanking with Arena. She's going to activate her Jewel Threat Gauntlets with a minor action. So, now there is a... Let's see. Until the end of the encounter, when you're flanking an enemy, you and the ally flanking, you gain an additional plus one bonus to attack rolls against that enemy.

Oh, shit. So, do I still get another attack? Um... Or does that have to be done at the same time as the first attack? It doesn't... Here's the thing. Hmm. The power reads strangely, right? Because it's like, oh, you're targeting one or two creatures and then you can shift after the first attack. I am going to give it to you. You attack? Yeah. Ah, yes, son. I'm sure that there are a bunch of people who won't interpret it that way. I'm going to say yeah. Go ahead. Oh, my God. That is a crit miss. Well, at least... It does half damage at least on it. Alright. So go up to the plus/minus.

Mm-hmm. Half damage. Alright. Boom. That is still a shitload of damage. That's 17 damage. I rolled one, two, three, four, five ones out of six D8s. Yeah. So half of that? I mean, that's still good. Like, that is bad luck. That was half. Uh, Zoya, your turn. Alright. Let's see. So what Zoya is going to do, she's going to move and I am just going to pop myself up here. I can't remember what my movement is. I think it's five, isn't it? Yes, I believe so. Okay. Because you're a dwarf. Mm-hmm. And I am then going to cast Sacred Flame that is going to target one creature, Wisdom versus Reflex.

If it hits, it does one D6 plus wisdom modifier radiant damage and one ally, you can see, chooses either to make a saving throw or to gain temporary hit points equal to my charisma modifier and one half my level. Okay. So I am going to target Nivolt, Master Slaver. And let's see what we do. That'll hit. That'll hit. Nine damage to the Master Slaver. Alright. And does anyone, I can see Zora, so she is going to need to take some hit points. And just a moment. There you go. Alright. Erina, your turn. Okay. I want to do something. Okay. Good plan. Behind the master slaver guy there, that's like a rock wall?

Yes. Can I shove him up against the rock wall or try to shove him up against the rock wall? As part of a move? Move or action, I don't care. I just want to pin him up against the wall, like with my arm under his throat or something. So you want to try and grab him basically? Yeah, I guess. Okay. Do you have an action point? I used it already. Okay. That's going to be your standard action. That's fine. Okay. Go ahead. It's your strength versus his reflex. So your strength mod. Okay, so I'd just... So it would just be a d20+2 then? Five. Five. Okay. That's why I wasn't sure.

Because it's a check. You're just like, "Mod!" and yeah. Okay. Let's see here. Yep, that'll do it. Awesome. So you're pinning him against this wall. Yep. Okay. So... Sorry, go ahead. No, go. And I'm going to turn my head to the side so you can see my neck. And I ask him, "Is this what you were looking for?" And then... I don't know if that's long enough of a pause. So when she turns... So when Irena turns her neck, you're going to see there's like a brand inside of her neck. And it kind of looks like what? It's like an N, right? Mm-hmm. Okay. Kind of flared out at the ends and stuff.

That is definitely the evolved brand, yeah. Yeah. This guy's eyes are going to kind of... just bulge a bit. Because he realizes, "Oh, I might be in trouble here." All of his friends are dead. Everything... This did not go the way that he was planning on when his day started. Sora, your turn. Beautiful. So. Sora's done with this. So she is going to move right up next to him. And she is going to use Finishing Cut. So I'm just going to take my short sword and just stab him, hoping that this finishes it. Okay. If this doesn't hit, please. That will hit. Because he's bloodied.

So first I have this damage. That is going to kill the slaver. But he's still up against the wall because I have a pin there. Yes. Oh, that's the thing. He is going to be struggling against Erina's grip the entire time. And Sora is going to come in and just cut into his stomach. And trails will spill everywhere. That is going to slice right through his thick leather armor and into his belly works. And he is going to loosen his grip after a moment. And just sort of hang there slack unless Erina lets go. Yeah, after a minute. And this guy is ultra-mega super dead.

Yes. And he is just going to slump against this wall, weapon spilling to the floor moments earlier. And that will take you guys out of combat. And I think that is probably a good time for us to wrap things up for the night. What about the horse? We are going to see what can be done about the horse and everything in the next. Zoya is totally going to try and heal the horse. Yeah. I don't know if there is anything you can do for the horse. Yeah. She will fucking try. Hey everybody out there. Thank you very much for listening to today's episode. If you like what we do, then there is a bunch of ways you can help out the show.

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