Conviction

This transcript is machine-generated and may contain errors in names, terminology, or attribution.

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I'm Jason, I'm the Dungeon Master. Going around the table, starting with Mac. Hi, I'm Mac and I play Kolluna Volgarius, the Wildling Shaman. And Bree. Hi, I'm Brianna and I play Phantas, the Ghislerai Sion. And Izzy. Hi, I'm Izzy and I play Una, the Half-Elf Paladin. And Jasper. I am Jasper and I play Maric Elpared, Human Cleric. So guys, last time on the show, you said your goodbyes in Brightport, you wrapped up some things, and you had Barden finish prepping the ship, and you all boarded it and you left the mainland behind. So, this is going to be a semi-long and arduous journey.

Now, what you have in your favor is you have a guide, you have a crew for the ship. These are experienced people. You couldn't have set yourself up better for a journey like this. It costs money, obviously, but you probably made the right decision in terms of the time you have left and dangers and all that stuff. Because there's another group on the show who would probably bring a few deckhands or a guide, something like that, if they had it all to do over again. But what I'd like someone to do is roll a flat d20 for me today to start things off. Oh, man.

Not it. I'll do it. Okay. I like that initiative. Hey, hang on. Don't say initiative. Don't do that. [laughter] Nice. A nine is not great. It's not great. It's not great. I hear what you're saying. [laughter] I think we aren't supposed to be great. I think someone said something about that. But it's as close to one as we could get, and we're trying to hit one, right? Yes. Oh, well, if it's not one, then let me roll it again, because I thought we were rolling towards one. Let me try 20, okay? [laughter] Excellent. A five. That's a five. Okay, we're going to go with a nine, just because.

Okay, thank you. But that five is tempting. Let's see. So. Sorry, everybody. It's a nine. There's been way worse for groups. It's true. It's actually right in the middle. Nine, 10, 11 is right in the middle of a 20-sided die. Alright, so you guys are on the water, and as the mainland fades into the distance behind you, I would imagine that just kind of taking in the sight, watching it just kind of fall away. You'd see, like, Uminyiro in the sky in the distance. You'd see the stray dragon every once in a while hovering around the mountain. And it's kind of beautiful in that it's nice to see those dangers and things and kind of observe them through the eyes of, it's like, wow, that is a beautiful sight, because I don't have to deal with any of that.

Like, it's kind of nice. I can imagine that. Yeah. It's like, it's a surreal, nothing there matters if you're not there, in a way. Right, kind of, yeah. Not my problem anymore. I mean, I always imagine the feeling of having, you know, people being on the moon and looking back at Earth and being like, kind of doesn't matter from here, in a way. Yeah. So you guys are going to be traveling north. Now, it's a little slow going because of weather. The weather isn't exactly being as cooperative with you as it could. Really bad gusts and kind of misty, not necessarily rainy, but it's threatening to get bad at a certain point.

And of course, the further you travel north, the colder it's going to get. That wind is going to kind of cut into you a little bit here and there. But for the most part, unless you guys want to sightsee, you don't even have to be on deck. You can be below deck hanging out. We can be throwing up anywhere we want to. You can be anywhere, anywhere you want. And that was kind of the next thing I was going to ask, because this is a little choppy. Does anyone... do you feel like anyone would get seasick or just kind of nauseous or just uncomfortable on a ship?

Because I always picture, in a setting like this, ship travel would be kind of like how people get scared about planes. It's that feeling of not having control, and if the ship should go down, then you don't have a ton of options in the middle of the ocean. True. I feel like for Marek, his endurance is so high because of all of the wolf stuff that went on before, I feel like he would be in good shape for being not seasick. That's my guess. I mean, I don't feel that way. That's probably... I mean, you've done some ship travel before, too. Yeah. I really want to say that I feel like Una would just be like, "Yeah, I'm fine." But she probably wouldn't.

Well, as we discovered in the last episode, the Onhelada clan might be like... Yeah. Not that Julie's technically an Onhelada. I feel like I should make her roll or something for that. Ah, you know what? Roll endurance. I'd say ten and above, you're fine. Okay. That means I'm going to get a three. And even down to a five, it's just nausea. It's just like, "Ugh, if we could stop rocketing, that'd be nice." Five and below, you've got vomit troubles. It's a long trip, though. Eventually you get used to it, right? Yeah, totally. Charles Darwin. Sorry. Hey, I'm doing fine.

All right. Let's check out... Julie's fine, too. Yeah, I would say that it's not... Yeah, and Breeze... Yeah, it's fine. Damn. Yeah, she's been through a lot. Her endurance is fairly high. Yeah. So Merrick's good. Coolant and Thanatos, you guys want to roll an endurance check? Everyone seems to be doing it. No, I'd rather not. But sure, I will do it. You're fine. I actually... My mod... Good lord. I think this has happened before, but every time Kelowna rolls, it's like, "Your endurance is really high." Listen, pig wrestling. So, what we're going to do is, we're going to advance a few days.

So the first few days of this journey is just kind of... Not stormy seas, but gray, windy, kind of misty out, the occasional raindrop, something like that. I'd say by day three, it's more sleet, and it's a little more constant. So we're going to advance to the 25th of Thorim, and like I said, the weather's going to get worse, and Barden would probably just let you know, kind of each day at the end of the day, just let you know what you're on target for. He would tell you at the end, at this rate, you would probably get to Kien safely in the next four days, five days, somewhere in there.

That's not bad. It's not bad. I thought this journey was supposed to take two or something weeks. It's in total... Getting to Kien is not the problem. It's finding a place to get the ship to, to kind of get someplace safe enough that you guys can take days. That's the thing that's going to take probably days. Okay. Sorry, go ahead. I didn't mean to interrupt. No. I don't even know what I was saying. Something stupid. Oh, no, I'm sorry. No, no, I think I was really actually saying something stupid. I don't even know what I was saying. So what would be going on on the ship?

There's not a ton to do in terms of entertainment. I would imagine there's reading and a communal dinner time and stuff like that, but the thing that I would imagine is on people's minds is now it's not... This entire seal thing, right? This is something you guys have been talking about hypothetically and like, well, if we were to do this, if we were to do that, I would imagine it's just like anything else. Like if you're planning for a big trip or something, it's something that's, yeah, I can't wait. I can't wait. And then the day you're on the plane getting ready to take off, that's when it's real.

It's like, oh, but this is a thing that's happening. Yeah. Would that change the way the discussion is being shaped? I feel for Merrick he would probably end up being very quiet, more than wanting to chat about stuff. Not intentionally avoiding anybody, but just... I think his default would be just sort of hunkering down. Like almost instead of this being a... I guess actually like a plane ride, right? Like you just sort of hunker down. You're not like thinking about anything. You're just sort of waiting for it to be over. Because I think he knows it's very, very real and it's about to happen, whatever's happening.

I think he's just stealing himself. I think Udo would want to talk to... Well, I mean, she'd talk to everyone probably, but instead of having to go around and do that, she'd probably want to talk to Thanos. Sweet. So just any time of day, it doesn't matter. Probably not around other people, though. So she's going to like take her aside and just be like, "All right, so I know that Scions have a lot kind of riding on the seal. So what's your plan? What do you know?" Before you found her, Thanos probably like the whole time they've been on the ship, she's done exactly what she did in Dragon Keep, but there's probably not much to find on the ship that's fun, but she just wanders around.

And when she gets pulled aside, she maybe kind of shrugs. I know exactly what you know. Is that a bluff? That is right. Well, I have all the same information that you do, right? You have that chant thing that you memorized. Right. But the librarian said that that was a thing, right, Jason? He said it out loud. Yeah, that was public knowledge. It was, yes. Okay. I don't remember if I was there for that or not. I think by that point you had stormed out of the room. Yeah. Oh, yeah, you're right. Never mind. She wasn't trying to lie to you. She just, maybe she assumed that Merrick told you or something.

Okay. Can you remind me really quick what the whole deal with that thing was? Just so I like, me personally, I remember not in character. Jason? The whole deal with what? The chant, specifically. Oh, so okay. Essentially there are, you guys know that there are two incantations. One would release the demons, one would release the gods. There's also a reverse, so that if one process was started, there are a few minutes of, it's kind of a fail-safe. It's like, all right. It's basically like a computer program asking, "Are you sure?" before it deletes all your data.

That's what it's doing. So, Thanos made an effort to memorize the chant that would sort of put the demons back. Gotcha. And there's absolutely no references to gods anywhere in the literature. Not the really old stuff, no. Which is probably the most accurate stuff. It depends on how you look at it, yeah. Helpful. All right. So she was going to say, well, gods, demons, do you, I mean, we know about the demons. Do you think the gods are actually trapped? Maybe something is. And then she's going to kind of look at your armor because I think you're very obviously a paladin.

Because it's one of those things that you can tell just by looking, not offend you or anything, but I've never really believed in gods. But I guess something really powerful could be locked up. It doesn't mean they're good. It was kind of like, not glare at this 14-year-old, but just kind of like fix her gaze on her, I guess. Well, I'm not sure that there's any good entity in the world, you know. I'm trying really hard to believe in the gods, and I think I still do. But I'm not sure the gods are good, or I'm good, or you're good. You're probably not good.

You don't look very good. And she's kind of like, wait, nope, that means something else, just in her mind. Like, oh shit. That's not what I mean. I mean, you know what I mean. Sansa's going to look down at her clothes like, what? Fuck. You could wash them in weeks now. You went to a spa. They were very well washed. That's true. I was just kind of like, if there is a great power locked away that isn't the demons, either it's the gods and they should be released, or it's something else that's powerful that should probably still be released anyway. And we know the demons are evil, so unless the seal is locking away two evil things, do you think we should give it a shot?

Sansa's just going to shrug. Like, I wasn't taught anything about gods. I don't know anything about that. I do know that you can trap two evil things. And let's say the legends are somehow true. What you believe about gods is true. That doesn't mean that they're good. They could just be as fucked up as the rest of us, but with more power. I mean, what's the problem with that? If they're not good and they're as fucked up as the rest of us and they have more power, so they do things to the world that are either fucked up or selfish or for any of the reasons that we do things, that just makes a bit of a more interesting world, right?

No more evil and no more good and just more flavorful. Franta's going to look down and look very thoughtful for a long moment and then, have you ever seen what someone really powerful and really evil can do? Una's going to look her directly in the eyes and just say, "Yes, I absolutely have. Many times." You want to let that out, just in case? Have you ever seen what someone good and really powerful can do? I've seen them try. And I've seen them get killed for it. I'm not talking about attempts. I'm talking about successes. Have you ever seen someone good and very powerful do something good?

No. Have you? Yes. Fewer times than I've seen powerful evil bastards running around, but... Because from what I've seen, good people stop the bad people, but the bad people do evil shit. I don't think that good people necessarily always stop the bad people. Sometimes powerful good people cancel out powerful bad people, but I think in general, most people are majority good. There's badness and goodness in everyone, but there's a little bit more goodness in the general population. I think that means they just bake bread or farm or dig holes or raise chickens or sell goods.

I think that can just be considered being good. And all those little goods compacted together, I think that's the general state of most people. And the bad ones are the really rotten ones who get power. So you're talking about letting out someone who could cause, or some people, who could cause so much damage, who could ruin lives, who could spread... And then she's gonna kind of stop herself. She was about to say something really fucked up, and then she's like, "Nope." Almost like Gory, maybe she got a little bit more out, like, "Who will spread children's brains and then stop?" Oh, okay, okay.

Gotcha. Yeah. Just in case one of them bakes bread? I mean, I'm just saying, I don't know, we don't know, no one knows if the thing that's not the demons is good or evil. It's not taking a chance and hoping that there will be some good coming out with the bad. It's taking a chance that there will be half and half good and bad, or all good. I mean, it seems like the plan right now is to go to the seal, stop the demons from being released, and then go about our merry business. But you want to open it for the gods? Look, I just think that, in general, this world is more fucked up and shitty and dark and just generally kind of crap than it probably should be.

And a good explanation for that is that there's a large force for good missing in the world. I think that maybe the gods are that balance that's missing. And sure, the demons should be stopped, and I'm not arguing that point at all. But going about our merry business means me and Bree, if she survives, because god knows she's dying every second, Kaluna, Merrick, you, if it's even something you're interested in, we're going to spend the rest of our lives cleaning up the shit in the world over and over and over and over, because there's no larger force for good balancing it out.

And honestly, while that's appealing to some extent, because fighting is fun as hell, I'm going to get too old at some point. Or I'll slip up, make a mistake, I've done it before. And die. I'm not saying I want to live forever, but I'd like when I die for there to be some hope, some little knowledge that, okay, I'm leaving the world, but I'm leaving it in okay hands. Or balance will triumph in the end. Something, I don't fucking know. I mean, what do I know? I'm a paladin. I'm not known for introspection. I don't think I believe in balance. You don't need to believe in balance, it just happens.

You have faith. That's what you're trying to sell me on right now. Faith in the gods, faith in good and evil. And I think, and she looks almost like she's guilty already for what she's about to say. I just believe in reality. The reality is it's just a fucked up world with fucked up people in it. And sometimes evil fucking wins. Because there is no balance. And that's just how it is. Una's gonna take a deep breath and kind of glare at her and say, "Look, you're misunderstanding me. I'm not trying to sell you on faith. I've had my own crises of faith. I'm not gonna try and convince people the gods exist.

That's not my job anymore. I'm trying to sell you on hope." Watch this. And Una's gonna shove Thanatos a little bit. And, I mean, not hard enough to shove her into a wall or something like that just to destabilize her. I'm assuming she'll just kind of keep standing up? Yeah, she wouldn't just go dead. But yeah. Any other reaction to that? Fist-clenching, teeth-nashing? Can it be shared with Thanatos? Probably not. I'd say usually she's more hostile. But as of late, since learning that spell and all of that, she's been kind of more melancholy. So she's just gonna let you do whatever you're doing.

Alright. Just say, "Balance. Right there. I shove you. You stand up straight." If it can exist in something that tiny, that annoying little moment, it's gotta be able to exist in a larger scale, right? There's just something missing. The strength to keep standing up even though you're being shoved? That's missing from the soul of our world. At least I fucking hope it is. And what do we have to lose? By trying. Truly. If the world is so fucked up and shitty and evil wins, just fuck it. Dump more evil in. At least there's a chance. You know, if some evil escapes, maybe some goodwill too.

Maybe the balance will be restored a little bit. What do we have to lose? Truly. Our lives? We already fucking signed those away. The world isn't a person. It's just a thing. And she's gonna kinda gesture at the boat as a whole. It doesn't have cognizance. It can't stand up on its own feet. It's not like that. There is no soul to the world. It's just dirt and water. There's magic. You wield it. I wield it. We might wield completely different versions. You might pull yours from yourself. I might pull mine from myself as well. Doesn't feel like that. If there's magic, then there has to be something more than just dirt and water.

Dantus will just shrug like, "I don't... I just... things could be worse." And letting something out that could potentially be as evil as the evil that we've seen with our own fucking eyes. And it's more powerful than us, and we unleash that onto innocent people, when they're already fighting to survive. And we just snuff that out based on a chance. That doesn't feel right. I should say, I understand what you mean. Believe me, I do. But how many things have you felt all that right about in your life? How many actually innocent people have you met? If the world is as fucked up and evil and terrible as it is, and as you believe reality to be, then what the fuck?

What does it matter if there's a little bit more evil, and the plan doesn't work? And whatever evil the second being in the seal is, is released, and if the world is already terrible, and people aren't that innocent, because there's gotta be somebody making up all the terribleness, what does it matter? Some people die. Innocent people die. Innocent people are gonna die regardless. Innocent people always die. Guilty people die too. If the world is already, if the standard is already so fucking low, the chance for a couple notches down does not seem that bad, if it might amp it up a little bit.

Santos is going to look kind of pale, and then her shoulders are going to slouch. Look, I have known innocent people. Back at the Allure, I knew innocent people. And my teacher made a mistake years ago, and he let loose some evil fucking shit. And they all died horribly because of a mistake he made trying to make the world a better place. Fourteen children spread across the walls, on the floor. I couldn't tell them apart anymore. But he left my teacher there in one piece, in the center. I can't believe that good can triumph, but I know that good can release a shit ton of evil.

So Una is going to be flashing back to murdering a bunch of drow children. Accidentally, and not her personally, and it made her angry, but she'll just kind of bite her lip and just say, "Look, would you consider things I've done good?" It's okay to say no. I mean, mostly we've just beaten up a bunch of people in a bar. It's just going to kind of give you a look like, "Eh." Because she doesn't know all the heroic shit you did. Like, she knows you fought a dragon or whatever, but she doesn't know everything about what you've done. She only knows what she's seen.

So in general, maybe we're trying to do good, but she hasn't seen you do... I would like to think mostly it's been good. But believe it or not, I'm partially responsible for the death of a nursery full of children. Granted, I didn't know that they were kids. I didn't know there was anyone behind that wall, a comrade of mine through the explosive, that killed them. They were innocent. They were probably as innocent as any creature can be, having not had much time to fuck up yet. But I'm just saying, there's probably not too much difference between your teacher or the person who killed all of your friends.

Well, anyway, the difference between them and myself is probably not too far off. I've killed kids indirectly, but I have to take that on my conscience. This world is not... You can't be all good. There's moral complexity to things. And it's really hard to do good things, and it's really easy to do bad things. And if that's the way the world is, if that's the way the world flows, and innocent people have been dying the whole fucking time, even when good people, or people who think they're good or people who want to be good, are trying to do good things, then what can it hurt to see what's behind that second seal?

I know the books didn't mention any gods, and this is just... That's the one last possible hope I have, is that taking things on more or less blind faith and a "fuck it" attitude, there might be gods. And they might be trapped. The whole time you're admitting to the whole child murder thing, Fantus's fists are going to clench and she's glaring at you. And even as you're saying "I didn't mean to, blah blah blah," that doesn't really go away. Goodie. Don't blow a hole in the ship. Do I have to perception check to notice that? I would say it's pretty much on the face.

Yeah, she doesn't hide things very well. So, what you're saying is, one time you did something fucking stupid and murdered a bunch of innocent people. But you want to take a chance to open another door and maybe do something fucking stupid and murder a bunch of innocent people. But no, that's not what I'm saying. You got hung up on the first part. You're young? I'm young, fuck. I don't know why I'm telling you you're young. We're both young. You're younger than I am. So, maybe you haven't had time to fuck up as much? And she's going to start thinking, "Maybe I shouldn't be telling you this." Then it's just a three second, "Maybe I shouldn't be saying this.

Ah, fuck it" kind of moment. I'm just saying that innocent people die regardless of what's happening. Good people, or people who are trying to do good, kill innocent people. People who are doing evil kill innocent people. And they might actually end up killing approximately the same amount. I'm sure there are little baby demons running around that we're going to be in charge of murdering. They're probably vaguely innocent as demons go. That's just the nature of their being. Innocent things are going to die no matter what "side" (and she's going to do like air quotes as hard as she can) you fall on.

So if there's a chance to kind of throw some balance into the world, why not? Because, seriously, there is almost no hope right now. It's kind of just, make sure that the next really horribly shitty world ending thing doesn't happen. Okay, if we succeed in that and the chances are fucking slim, then continue on. Make sure the next huge shitty thing doesn't happen. And it's just a series of plugging holes in a leaky dam for the rest of eternity for every living thing that doesn't consider itself delightfully evil. That a world you want to live in? The whole time you're talking, Santos' head is down and her hair is kind of creating a curtain around her face.

And when you do ask her that question, she's going to look up and her eyes have gone completely red. Oh god, should I leave now? And her hands are kind of shaking, not glowing yet, but like shaking. Look, you don't have the fucking power for it. So you're trying to convince me to risk my goddamn life to free your fucking gods. Why don't you go convince your girlfriend to fucking kill herself for you? And then she's going to turn around and walk away before she does blow a hole in the ship. And I'll just go, "That wasn't my point!" And then she'll go and ask Brie to kill herself.

Let me ask a question here. What would Kaluna and Merrick be doing at this point? Hmm... Kaluna? So Kaluna is not a fan of being on a ship. They're not cool with it. They're not like sick or anything, obviously, from the rules earlier, but they're like, "How much longer are we going to be here?" Kind of like the little kid on a road trip, "Are we there yet? Are we there yet? Are we there yet?" But I think they'd mostly sort of try to hide out of the way. Just like, because they're like, "I don't know what the fuck is going on. People are doing things that are keeping me from dying, so I'll just stay out of their way." I don't know.

Probably in a corner somewhere. Yeah, like between barrels of food in the hull somewhere. Exactly. I think Merrick would like to find Kaluna. Just for a brief chat. So wherever... I mean, he'll search around. He's just scooting barrels out of the way and then he suddenly sees that awful glow-your-front, like the eye thing. Right. Yeah, Merrick's just going to look around and probably know where to start looking. Kaluna's probably there and will probably find them. So when he finds Kaluna, just to set the scene a little bit, he's been... I imagine that the way I see it is he's kind of like up on the deck.

The weather is getting stormier and stormier. He's just kind of... and he's finally putting on thicker and thicker furs as they get further north. He's standing on the... you know, looking over the bow of the ship. You know, very iconic is what I guess I'm saying. And just thinking and thinking and thinking about what all of this means and what they need to do. So he's going to find Kaluna. And I'm just sort of imagining that Kaluna's sitting down on the ground or something like that. Between barrels or something. He's going to just sit on the floor in front of them and say, "Hey." And he's going to reach out his hands.

Both of his hands. Like, "Grab my hands." "Kaluna, what do you say?" This isn't just the normal adventure, you know? This isn't just us defeating a dragon or cleaning out a dungeon or... This could be more important to everyone in Theria than they will ever realize. Do you understand? This whole time Kaluna's listening intently like, "Yeah, okay, okay, you're building up to a point." And then, "Do you understand?" And they're going to look exasperated. Like, "You think we didn't fucking get that?" So they're just going to give him that look like, "Yes.

Thanks." Yeah, I don't mean that you don't understand. I just mean, "Do you understand where I am?" Listen, there's a good chance that whatever is about to happen... And we've got some time and we've got things to do before we get to that seal. But once we land on Kion, there's no turning back and there's no chatting. I don't think there's even having any fun. It's go, go, go until we're at the seal. There's a good chance that we're not going to make it. I'm not going to make it. You're not going to make it. But I don't know. Something just tells me that this is going to go okay.

But I don't think it's going to go okay for everybody. I'm not a psychic. I don't see the future. I guess what I'm saying is if something happens to me, Kaluna, I don't need my story to be told or I don't have much of a story in the first place. But just to know that if something happens to me and nothing happens to you, to know that you keep me in your mind is all I want. Just remember me. Okay? Kaluna is definitely like, by the end of that Kaluna is sort of like, they're not tearing up quite, but like their eyes are watery. And like time to explain complicated concepts and limited vocabulary.

Actually, they'll like open their mouth to say something. And then they'll reach into whatever pouch that they have. They will jar of dirt. And they'll sort of hold it up. Not like offering it, but just, you know, showing it to them. And they'll say, "We brought this because it reminds us of our mom. We, um, well then when we die, we go on in everyone's hearts. When you meet someone and you care about them, they're in your heart always. You don't need to ask us to bring you with us, Merrick, because you're already there." He's going to sigh deeply. And he's just going to say, "Well then, I'm already immortal.

So I don't have anything to fear. And that's thanks to you." Kaluna is finally going to tear up and they're going to get a little smile. And he's going to squeeze their hands and then just kind of give a look and sort of a squeeze. Just kind of say like, "I'm going to leave you alone now. Like I know you want to be alone. And, you know, that's all I needed. I just wanted to be there with you." And then all that's done in a glance and a squeeze of a hand. And then he's going to not let go of his hands and just like drag him back in for a hug. The tightest hug there's ever been.

He'll choke to death before they reach land. Well, there you go. No, he'll of course just embrace, like super embrace. And then lean back and do the same sort of thing where it's like, "Okay, all right. You need your space. You need your time. You know where I'll be." And he'll head back up to the deck. He puts a box over them. And he puts a little bit of food and water in a bowl and puts it out. No. And that's it. I hate all of this. All done. I love it. This is where I want to live in my life. Okay, all done. I would like to talk to Merrick if nobody else has little roleplay segments they want to do right now.

I would imagine that this is something that's been happening all over the ship for the duration of this journey. Like they're not all in a row, like, "Hey, Merrick, when you're done with Kaluna, come over here." No, no. I think this is, yeah, maybe this is in order, but not like within two hours. Days are passing and it's just, because again, there's nothing to do on the ship, but think about what's coming and then just kind of talk to each other. It's the same thing when people are in wagons for days at a time. But there's literally nothing for you guys to do.

You don't have to keep your eyes on the horizon if you don't want. You're not steering the ship. You're not guiding anything. There is nothing for you to be in charge of at the moment. It's on the planes into Normandy to drop down for D-Day. You know what? I didn't want to put pressure on you guys. But it is, you remember Saving Private Ryan, the opening scene where they're on the ship and there's like minutes that go by and everyone's just kind of like looking down or at each other. Yeah, that's kind of like, you have a lot of time to think. If it's okay before that, could I do something that would have immediately followed the Una/Phantos conversation?

Absolutely. So, Thanatos isn't good with controlling her powers, basically. She's been trained, but she kind of, when everything went down, lost that part of things. Like she doesn't meditate. She doesn't control herself anymore. So I would hope that maybe, I know this is kind of meta, but it would, if while getting away from Una, maybe if she could find Bree. So that she could get some help with that to not destroy the ship. Yeah, I don't think I would be meta. I think I would be, like there's only one other Sion. Like maybe a part of her is seeking her out too.

Like there's only one other Sion, yeah. Okay. Just say all of this is just taking place in the same day. These particular conversations are taking place in the same day. Bree would be probably above deck, honestly. And it's just kind of a thing, not hanging over the side, but just kind of leaning on the side of the ship here while things roll past. Again, it's kind of minorly sleeting outside, so it's like little bits of ice, you can hear that "ttttt" as it sort of bounces against the deck and just sort of staring off in the distance. Santos would probably come up on deck, her hands are starting to glow now, like she progressively got angrier as she walked away.

It's one of those things where you think about the conversation and you just can't let it go. And she knows the trouble is coming. So when she sees Bree, she'll be shaking and just furious and... Bree? And I don't know if she would, I don't know if she would notice right away, just kind of like again staring off, and then she'd look over and see that it's like, Oh, okay, we have a situation. Okay. Are you okay? She's gonna shake her head and kind of hold her hands up. And little claws like, I don't know how to make this stop. Alright. I need you to listen to me very carefully.

Can you do that? She'll nod. Okay. I want you to look me in the eyes. I want you to take several deep breaths. She'll do that. And maybe her hands stop glowing a little bit but she's still shaking. Right. I usually just hit something but... and then she's gonna kind of look around the boat like I can't. Right. And yeah, just kind of, I think she'd nod. Yeah, that's probably not a great idea right now. Okay, try to unclench your fists. And she will first they become kind of like claws and then she flexes her fingers. Okay. Okay. Still taking deep breaths, looking at Bree.

Okay. How do you do it? Do what? How do you control it like you do? And it'll be a thing where she almost, she almost chuckles but like, that's not the time for this. Like that's not... Well, I'm not always so good at it either. I had people to teach me. I had people to show me and... I was put in a position where people relied on me. I was in charge of people and if I lost my temper, or I didn't think with my head, then people died. It's not something I learned overnight. If Thanos' hands are gonna kind of fall down, no red in them, and as her eyes start to go back to normal, it's going to become clear that they've kind of missed it over.

I don't have anyone. He's gone. If Thanos would let her, Bree would immediately sort of wrap an arm around her and try to guide her to sit down. There'd be like crates, boxes, things like that on the side of the ship and just try to sit down and take a few deep breaths and relax. She's going to start crying very quietly. It's not the same as when she was with Merrick because at that point she was kind of drunk. Because you guys let her get drunk a lot, which is weird for a 14 year old. She's 15 I thought. I'm pretty sure. I think that she was 14 when all the shit went down and then she turned 15 on the boat.

So that's plenty of time to... that's a lot more age. That's the age you start teaching them to drink. Yeah, so when would Theria ever have an age limit? Like when would that have ever been a thing? Maybe in some of the better cities. I don't know about the... If you can't survive at five years old with something really, really strong, then you probably don't deserve to live. That's just natural selection. It's better for Theria. But yeah, she's going to... like it's more controlled. She's trying harder to hold it back. She's not openly sobbing. It's just tears trailing down her cheeks and she's going to lean into Bree.

Yeah, she would be doing that thing where like one arm's wrapped around the other arm's just sort of gently rubbing, just trying to comfort. He was a good person. And that's kind of all. She's gonna go into silence and just set her head on Bree's shoulder, just glad that she didn't blow up the ship, mostly. Right. You know, the last thing I want to do is upset you again. And I know it might be kind of painful to talk about, but... Do you want to tell me about it? It might help? There's only going to be like a moment and then she's going to kind of nod very... like, have you ever been comforting?

I don't want to use this because I know that she's... the age thing is kind of weird with Santos, but like, you know when you're comforting the toddler and you're like, do you want to get some ice cream? And then there's that kind of like, I'm still mad, but yeah, like that kind of thing. It's going to be like that a quiet, like, but quick nod, like, you know, that she's... that maybe it's something that's kind of building up for a while. Right. Before... before him, I didn't have anyone. They kept me in the dark and I was just a weapon. But he brought me to his alarm and...

He talked to me. And he was so patient. He was... he was good. He was a good person, and... I don't think there's anyone else out there who's that good. Una says that the world is supposed to have some balance or something like that, but... If someone that good can just be killed by someone so evil, I just... I don't think there's any hope. Do you mind if I tell you a story? I'm just going to shake her head and then kind of look up, like, almost begging for the destruction. So... I told you about... I told you about my dad and everything that happened, and I felt... exactly the same as you did.

I've never really believed in gods or higher powers or any of that. And I still don't know how I feel about all of this. And I stumbled around for a long time. Directionless. I... I had work that I was doing and... I... I had a really close-knit family, but... I didn't feel like I had a lot to live for personally. You know? And I... eventually met Una. And... And she's gonna... she's gonna... She's gonna sort of trail off for just half a second. And while we got off on a really rough foot... I... did find another person that I cared for as much as... my original family.

You never know what's gonna happen. And I... Trust me, I know more than anybody that... controlling your powers and trying to live a normal life is... really difficult. But you shouldn't write off the rest of your life. I think things are gonna get better. Dandos kind of has like a thousand yard stare when she says that. Are you actually dying? Doesn't look great. Right now it looks like I'm... being kept alive by that... whatever she is, the witch's spell. And... I have to imagine that whatever happens during the blood moon... it probably won't end well for me.

And I have to walk into this knowing that. Why won't it end well? If the witch is keeping you alive, why can't she just keep keeping you alive? Well... Either I help open the seal, which is something she wants. And it'll kill me. Or... we don't open the seal. I think right after that, she's gonna know we didn't go through with it, and... I can't imagine she's gonna keep me alive after that. I won't be of any use. Thanos' eyes are gonna start watering up again, and she's just gonna kind of wrap her arms around Bree and hold her tightly. And just kind of leave it at that, like there's nothing to really say.

She would definitely squeeze tight. Hey... I would love more than anything to... to get to sail off into the sunset and spend the rest of my life with Una and... stay with you guys. And... maybe there's a slim chance that that could happen. But... If the blood moon comes and goes, and I'm gone after that... then at least I'll know that I hopefully made life better for someone else. That's what Una said too? I know it sucks sometimes, but... sometimes that's all we have. Do you know what you're going to do yet? With the seal? I was actually just thinking about it when you came to get me.

I have no idea. Santa's actually gonna laugh at that point. Something that frank. It's like, "Oh, okay." Wish I had something a little wiser to tell you, but... there's still weeks to go, and... I keep going back and forth. I just... wish I knew something for certain, you know? Yeah. Me too. It's um... It's getting pretty cold up here. Do you... maybe want to go below deck and warm up? She'll nod and slowly stand up and offer Bree a hand too. No, she'd definitely take it. Thank you. Hey, any time. If you ever want to talk about something, or... work on the whole controlling power stuff...

I'm here. Dantus will smile and follow Bree down into the decks. Or whatever they're called. Boat stuff. Dude, I don't know anything about ships. Boats. Okay, next group. Next, take a number. Yep. Who's next? Maric, do you want to stay up to date? Yeah, yeah. No, let's do it. Maric's camping out sort of on deck. Like he's watching us get to Kion. Not like 24 hours a day, but that's kind of where he's... that's his place. Alright. And he's gonna bring him Maric. Let's see. Like, I think like a mold... like a mold wine, like a hot, like spiced... Mmm. Mm-hmm. You know?

So she'll bring a couple of those up onto decks. 'Cause I'm sure it's cold and that sounds like it's something that'd be really yummy to drink in the cold. Yeah. So just bring that up and just kind of like stand next to him, hand him a mug, and just, you know, stare out at the view that he's also staring out at. Yeah, he'll take it very, like, "Aw man, this is perfect. Thank you." But he's not gonna say anything to that, but it's clear. So, I had a conversation with Thanos and she got real pissed. He's gonna sort of scoff and look at her and say, "Yeah, that's Thanos." Yeah, Una will actually laugh at that because, yeah, like she might as well have said, "I had a conversation with Thanos." Exactly.

She's like, "Yeah, you know, it's just we had a conversation about the seal and all... you know, what else are people having fucking conversations about right now?" That's all there is. It just... she accused me of trying to convince her to kill herself in order to open the seal. Is that what you were trying to tell her? No. I mean, I'm trying to figure out a way to have that conversation with Brie. And she'll like immediately follow it up with, "I don't want her to die, obviously, but I mean, I still think that the seal should be open, whatever lies beyond it.

But if she were to do that, I'd want to go with her." This is a... first of all, I get it. Second of all, trying to convince one of us to die to make something happen or not happen or however it's supposed to work for the seal is kind of ridiculous to me. Because Una, I'm telling you, I don't know if any of us are going to make it. I think it's... it's almost ridiculous to think about trying to convince one person or another to sacrifice themselves. I don't know that any of us are going to be around after this. But... You're going to be around. Yeah, I hope so.

I want all of us to be around. But this is a big deal. This isn't... this isn't just a fight. This isn't, you know, something happening in an alleyway and we'll get out of this one way or the other. This is something that's going to affect everything. I'm not a pessimist. You know me, right? I'm not a pessimist. And I'm not sitting here thinking that everything's going to go bad. I'm just saying this is big enough that I'm not expecting much here about us coming out of this unscathed. What I am expecting, because of who we are and what we've been through, is that we're going to make a difference.

But if we all had to sort of link our hands together and say a couple of words and none of us ever existed again, at this point I'm not going to be surprised about something like that. I get what you're saying. I know you're having individual conversations. Sure. She can think you're trying to convince her. You can think you're not. I don't know that this is all about one person's sacrifice. I think this is about all of us in some way, shape or form. I don't think... let's put it this way. I don't think if we survive this, I don't think we're going to be the same people afterwards, no matter what.

I'm just going to shrug. I mean, someone's got to make it out of this because it's going to make a fucking awesome story. And I think we all know, Maric, that you're the best at storytelling. So you and Kaluna, we've got to find a way to get you guys out of this alive. Because otherwise, if I die and no one's telling glorious tales about me, you better believe I'm haunting the shit out of everyone I can get my hands on. He's just laughing. He's just chuckling and looking down at his mulled wine. He's feeling shameful, right? Because he's being very negative and very foreboding and just kind of dark cloudy.

I mean, he's been staring off the prow of a ship in the rain for hours. I know, he's brooding and brooding. He's ruminating on this. And this is kind of breaking him out of it a little bit, right? He's just like, you know, this is the kind of optimism that I'm used to having and you're doing it. And yeah, maybe you're right. Maybe you're right. I just don't know. Just don't know. None of us know. That's the thing. There's no telling. We could all die. Absolutely. A meteor could strike this ship right now and we might die. As for being the same person when it's over, I'm not the same person I was five minutes ago.

I mean, they're similar. Don't get me wrong. I mean, you have changed immeasurably since I met you. You're no longer a werewolf, which is, I feel like, a big change. Yeah. I feel like half of me is gone. In a good way? Or... That's in character. In character? Yeah. He's going to shrug. He's going to be like, I don't know. It's all I ever knew. So yeah, I feel like part of me is gone even though it was torment. But all that aside, I feel like I found a purpose with all of you. And meeting you and fighting alongside you and being your friend has really made me feel like there is stuff to live for.

And that there is good. And that there are things to fight to make happen. So I'm here for that. And you're right. I'm thinking of this as the end of things. But maybe it's just a beginning. She's like, now that you're all optimistic, I'm going to bum you out again. Because chances are we're probably going to die. I mean, four, five, six, if you count Julie, of us. Versus... Was it an army of demons? A legion of demons? Yeah, I think it was. An ending, swirling chaos of demons. Right. Yeah, it was basically holding back the edge of death. Right. So unending chaos pit.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, we're all going to die. That's the same character in a little laugh. So if we're all going to die, are we going to die defending the seal from demons? Or are we going to die helping to open it and unleash the thing that's not demons? What do you... I mean, I know you expressed that you didn't want to open the seal. And I don't want to rehash that whole debate. Have you changed your mind? That's what I've been sitting here thinking about the whole time we've been on this boat. Leaving everything we've known behind. And heading to something that we don't even know less than that.

I feel like we all need to get together before we leave this ship. Or maybe when we land on Kian. You know? But I've got some stuff to say. And what it boils down to is this. I don't want to make a mistake. And I know one thing clearly. And that's that we can't let Darmok out. Right? If nothing else. I mean, forget the horde of endless chaos of demons. We can't let him out, right? If you have to seal that thing behind me while I jump into it with my teeth buried in his neck, you do that. That bastard is not entering this fucking world again. Alright, deal. But here's the thing.

I don't want to make a mistake. And I don't want to put any energy anywhere else. The only reason I'm going to the seal is to keep him away from her. And if that happens to, you know, save the rest of the world, then great. But for me it's not a choice about this or that or can we do more than one thing. It's about getting to the seal and making sure that it stays the fuck closed. So I haven't changed my mind, but it's not because of anything bad, it's just are you sure what kind of decision you could make beyond that? Yeah, unfortunately I'm pretty damn sure.

I want to open it. I just... You know me. My whole life's attitude has been fuck it. That hasn't worked out all that badly considering what a reckless philosophy it is. But that being said, I'm running on pure stupid hope. That's it. That's all. Because I'm hoping that we can do something to not just stop the world from ending yet again, but actually improve it. That's it. That's it. That's all I've got. I just... Maybe there's something that can be done. I guess I'm more careful than you are, but I get it. Maybe I'm too conservative. Hey, let me ask you one more question.

He's gonna down... Like he hasn't even sipped to this thing yet, right? He's like cupping his cup or the mug with his hands, just keeping warm. He's gonna actually just remember that it's there and he's gonna chug it. Just like glug, glug, glug, glug. What if all of this is done and everything goes the way you want it to go? What happens if you meet him? What if you meet Kord? What if you could talk to him? What would you say? Oh man. We'll probably do the exact same thing with her mulled wine. She'll just kind of like throw it back. She's been sipping on it this whole time, but she'll finish that.

And she'll kind of like fix the horizon in her gaze and just kind of like consider it for a few seconds. You know... As a paladin, I pray, you know. Usually quietly and in my mind because I don't want all of y'all fuckers snooping on my prayers. And you know, we're supposed to pray all the time. We've been doing it since I was seven. But I haven't actually thought about if I got face to face with Kord, what I'd say to him. And especially if he's trapped and it's not his fault that he couldn't respond to my prayers. Or the prayers of hundreds of thousands of other people who needed his help or strength or courage.

You know, I'd probably... I'd probably want to fight him. Just to see. Yeah, just to see how long it could last. I mean, I'd be dead. Clearly I'd be dead. There's no way I would meet him while I'm alive. So yeah, if I could trade a few blows with him, I think that's what I'd want to do. I am a paladin to my fucking core, unfortunately. That's for goddamn sure. And actually, at that point, he's gonna put his arm around Una. Like super friend hug. Not hug hug, but like both of them looking over the power of the ship type of hug. That's sweet. And all kinda like still eyes fixed off the side, not like trying to face him or anything like that.

Just like... Well, on a brighter note, I think it would cheer everyone up. And I think you would be particularly suited to this. I think we should throw a little party. Drinking, snacks, food. Oh. Mmm. Hey Jason? Yeah? Would it be a common knowledge type of thing to have a Therian type of pizza? Aboard a ship in the ocean? Well, like, no I just mean in general, like is, certainly wouldn't be called pizza. No. But like a flat bread. Yeah, I would say so. With stuff on top of it. Oh, totally. Yeah, oh he's gonna have a pizza party. Yeah. Whatever's possible. There's gonna be vegetarian ones.

Heart temp. Oh yeah. There's gonna be vegetarian ones. There's gonna be meat lovers. There's gonna be like a margarita. You know, just like, you know, some mozzarella, tomato sauce, and basil. But he's gonna go for a flat bread party and he's gonna whip that up as soon as possible. Okay. Question. Mmm hmm. So that we can conjure an image into the listener's mind. Would your version of pizza be leaning more East Coast, New York, Jersey, Pennsylvania pizza? Or like West Coast, California pizza where it's like, not really pizza. California, California. Right. Oh my god.

There's, California doesn't have pizza, Jason. They don't. No, right. So. There's been one place that I've had pizza since moving to this state that is actually pizza. Everything else has just been sort of pizza-ish. Yeah. This is actually gonna be one of those types of crusts that is, it's gonna be like a very thin and crispy type crust. Sounds like California pizza to me. No. No. No. I didn't say shitty. Shove fire! Crispy. Yeah. I lived, I was in San Francisco for many, many years. Can't say I ever had pizza. I've had a lot of things that looked like pizza. They're the shape of pizza.

They were the shape of pizza. Oh, and they call them pies too. Oh, they're gonna get a pie tonight. No, no. No, they don't. Yeah. They're in San Francisco. Oh my god. Yeah, I mean, this is gonna be good shit. This is gonna be the kind of thing where it's got the right texture and the right ratio of toppings to crust. Yeah, it's gonna be good. I mean, it's not East Coast or West Coast here. This is, this is, this is American Theria, right? Yeah. Okay. This is good stuff. This is good flatbread. But he's gonna make a pizza party. I think he's gonna get it all getting ready.

Like he's gonna make sure it's happening. And then he's gonna try to get everybody together once it's, it's kind of ready. In other words, he's not gonna give anybody any warning. He's just gonna be like, "Hey, hey, Kaluna, pizza party. Now let's go." So today's been emotional. It's been, it's been a long one. And I got to imagine some of it's just because you guys are under an unbelievable amount of stress and pressure and the severity of everything is sort of sinking in. And each day you're on this ship, it's just close quarters and nothing but time to think, right?

So today has been emotional. But I would say as, as the sun sets and, and night falls, Merrick would set this up and, and get it ready. And I guess gather everybody? Yeah, definitely. I hate to do this. In the galley. Oh my god. But I think Thanos would be a little shit and be like, "I'm not hungry." And she would just stay in her bedroom. Oh, Bree would totally try to coax her out. I don't think she would. I'm just saying she would try. It would be one of those things where it's like- Try to force a piece of pizza under the door. Right, maybe. That's how things are being scraped off.

At the very least, bring her, yeah, just bring her some. It's like, hey, you don't have to just because- She'd eat the pizza brought to her. Right. Yeah. And I believe it's one of those things where it's like, look, I get it. I mean, that's it. That's a tough thing to go through. Like, she was once your age still, you know, going through the powers thing and like, and, and like it's a different, it's a different upbringing and whatever. But like she, she on some level gets it. So it'd be like, hey, if you don't want to be around people, I get it. Just at least eat something.

So she would. She'd accept the pizza that was brought to her and say thank you and shit, but she would just kind of mope in her whatever quarters she is in during this party. Totally. But you guys have fun. But yeah, Julie, I would imagine this entire time, Julie has been sort of keeping to herself and sort of just either reading or going up on deck to look around because Julie's the type of person who really digs rainy days and, and so this weather would just be awesome. Like it's fine. It's great to kind of get in your own head and everything. So. But yeah, she would, she would join you guys, Bree would join you guys.

Kaluna will fight people over the meat lovers. It all belongs to them, even the stuff they don't eat. We will try and get everyone to play like drinking games that she learned at like the, at the Temple of Kord during Paladin training. Anybody else? I guess that's it for everybody. Yeah, at some point I think sort of at the end of this, right? So there's a party. It's not like party party. It's just like cheer up everybody for a little bit. And at the end, towards the end is that everything's winding up. There's barely any pizza left. Merrick's gonna say, okay, everybody, we need to huddle up real quick.

He's gonna get kind of serious. I'm assuming I'm pausing because I want to see if anybody's not going to pay attention. But I assume everybody's going to kind of pay attention. Begin to huddle. Yeah. Alright, okay, okay. Just making sure, just making sure. I just want to say a few things because we've got some big things happening here soon. We're almost to another continent, another world. And who knows what's going to await us. I know what we're headed towards. But there's going to be some stuff between us and the end of that. We're all here for different reasons.

We've all had our own different contexts and motivations. And he's looking around at everybody. He's looking directly in people's eyes as he says these things. And he's, you know, to the point where you think he's thinking, you know, each individual person's story is very individual and very unique. We're all hoping here to keep Theria safe one way or another. And I've been thinking about it a lot. We're all going to have to play our parts, whatever those parts end up being. We're going to all have a lot of choices to make. And I'm going to be honest with you, some of us aren't going to make it.

Perhaps none of us are going to make it. Maybe all of us will. And that's what I'm going to try to do. Keep all of you safe. I don't want anybody here if the worst happens to perish for no reason. It has to mean something. So I don't want to make a mistake. And the reason I'm saying anything to you is this. If you're with me, he's going to look at Una in particular, but everybody else. If you're with me, the seal stays closed. Anyone and anything that wants to get it open goes through us. If we want to open it, if we find a way to do the right things, then sure.

But if anybody or anything wants to open it against our will, they go through us, right? We're a united front or we die. And if there's something else we want to make happen, he's going to look at Una. If we want to free the gods, if we want to make something better happen, hopefully we can. But not to distract us from what really matters, from the demons, from those that can make this a living hell. I don't want to make a mistake. We have to be a united front or we die trying. If we get to make something good happen, if we get to free the gods, Una, and we feel like that's the right thing to do, if something good can come out of this beyond keeping the demons away, then either we'll make it happen, and if we can't do it now, we'll find another way.

We'll do it again later. Something will make it happen. And if it's not us, then it's going to be our daughters or our sons, someone after us. But right now, I have an imperative and I think we all do. We've got to keep the seal closed from the demons. Okay? That's where I am. And I hope you're all with me. We'll cheers that, the glass. Julie would nod her head and just raise a glass. Kalina would copy everyone else and raise a glass. Bree would take a little bit longer just, I think, thinking about the entire thing and then eventually nod her head and just sort of be with the party, just like go to reach for a glass and pick it up.

When everybody lifts all of their glasses, Merrick's going to say, "Tetharia." And yeah, Bree would be right on board, like yeah. And so would Julie. Though Julie would be a little slower. Luna's actually going to say, "Fur Azeroth." Fuck. No, yeah, she'll kind of roll her eyes and grin a little bit. She has to acknowledge that it's a little cheesy. Yeah. And I think that's where Julie's coming from. Yeah. Kalina thinks it's the coolest, most dramatic shit ever and yells it louder than everyone else. Just like too enthusiastic. Whatever, Dad. Julie would speak up.

Oh, while everyone's here, I've been reading up on this second Vecna Temple, if anyone wants to hear about it. Hell yeah. So it's supposed to be littered with dangers and really, really treacherous. Honestly, from what I'm seeing, I think that's getting there is most of the danger. It's really isolated, kind of tucked away. But there is something, it keeps coming up, something about a trial or judgment, something like that. That seems to be the center of this place, though. They weigh your heart, and if it's lighter than a feather... Trial. Judgment. I'm writing this down.

Trial/judgment. Done. Do we have the right to a fair and speedy trial? This is the theory. No, they drag it out. Like, yeah, we're going to keep you imprisoned for three and a half years before we actually try you. We had to gather evidence. But after kind of like, it's like... Yeah, that's something we can tackle when we get there, I'm sure. But it is interesting. I honestly can't wait to take a look at this place. I bet we're the first living people to set foot there for probably centuries. Well, I think we stand up very well to judgment. So... sounds great.

When do we arrive? Do you have a... What's the latest ETA that Barton gave us? Well, weather isn't exactly cooperating. This is Julie continuing. I imagine she would be talking to Barton the entire time, being as how he's the explorer. So it's just comparing her notes to his knowledge of continents and... Oh, yeah, okay, okay. So that lines up with this. Alright, alright. So the weather isn't exactly cooperating, so it's going to slow us down a bit. Probably be another five days at sea and then trying to find a place to actually safely get to the continent.

So probably over a week. How long will it take us to get to the temple? So that's kind of the risky part. Everything I've talked to Barton about indicates that this place is a death trap. It's cold. It's brutally cold. And then on top of that, if we avoid all the local wildlife, if we... If we could land somewhere near... at least on the side of the continent where the temple would be, probably three or four days travel. If not, then we get a long trek ahead of us. And then from there, I guess it's the seal. No time to lose. Kaluna just looks for more alcohol.

I mean, at this point, unless anybody's got something else to say for... I think pizza party's over. We basically just need to get to Kion unless there's anything else to say for the night. Well, here's what I'm going to ask. Is he? Yeah. Do me a favor. Roll a flat D20. Why me? Because I'm choosing you. Well, that's fucking lame. Oh, face. Six. That's what you get when you choose me. If we would have Merrick, it would have been a seven. Thirteen with the... wow, okay, yeah. Okay. Well, I don't think anybody really gets to... oh boy. Okay. As you sail ever north, things are going to get worse as the days stretch on.

You don't say. Well, okay. Weather-wise, this is going to get pretty tremendously bad, actually. There are going to be whole days where you guys are just getting pounded. Just really nasty frost and ice. The crew is going to constantly have to basically chisel ice off the mast or you are in danger of being top-heavy and capsizing. It's really bad. So bad, in fact, that a couple of crew members are going to die trying to keep the ship afloat. Now, that doesn't... I don't want to be crass here, but you have extras, essentially. This is a really full crew. But it's not good.

There's also going to be a couple of sightings. Off in the distance, there are going to be a few times where you're going to hear people scream up top. You're going to feel the ship list in a direction and they're going to be avoiding some things. You're getting the sense that this journey is a lot more dangerous than perhaps Barden thought it was going to be. Or maybe you were just like, "Ah, yeah, we can do that. No problem." It's a little harder than anyone perceived it to be. Now, days are going to roll by. And after nine more days... What? Yup. There are whole days where you just don't make any progress.

It's actually really bad. For you are now in a new month. The fifth of Estus. So congratulations, you are the furthest, actually, of any group right now. A lot of this is sadly not wasted time, but it's just how long this is taking. Now, luckily the crew is, again, literally killing themselves to make sure you guys get there safe. Nothing's happened to the ship. No one's been attacked or anything like that. It's just really, really bad weather. Now, if everyone would do me a favor and roll Perception, I would be eternally grateful. First off, meta, I took out life insurance policies on all of the crew.

Who would insure you? No, on the crew. Oh. Yeah, the crew. The crew members. Yeah, we're getting ready to go on the suicide run. I may have noticed something. Uh-huh. You might have. I may have noticed something here. Oh, wow. Just want to point that out. These are all very good. She's just a little busy sulking. That's why she's got Delois. I can't wait for this to be my highest level. And it's still very good. Yeah, still very good. Well, the first thing, you guys are going to hear the crew kind of yelling up top, and it's more of a "Yay!" kind of yell. You guys are in striking distance of Kion.

That is the good news. The bad news is that there are glaciers and really jagged, huge bits of ice that the crew is desperately trying to avoid. Should be pretty easy to avoid a glacier. Well, a glacier, yes. It's all that to the Titanic. Yeah, that's true. That was an iceberg. It's the same... You're completely different. No. There are young people who listen to this podcast and now think that glaciers and icebergs are the same. They're exactly the same, guys. They're just big chunks of ice? Yeah, don't let Izzy's propaganda end the world's flat. Oh, right. The world is flat.

Don't let those rounders out there tell you. The universe revolves around the earth. Yep. America is the center of the universe. That is... That is true. So we gotta get around some stuff. Yeah, and the crew is working on that right now. But I would like... This is the last D20 roll. Of our lives? Of your life. I'm going to say this one is for Mac. No. No, I've been really so bad. You got this. No. Okay, I'm gonna close my eyes. Alright, you got it. Hey! I'm gonna go with three. No. Middle of the road. Saladly mediocre. Passable! That is the D+ of... No. Oof. That would have been worse.

That would have been better. Una, do you wanna... Yeah, alright. Let's keep playing. Holy fuck! Oh! In that reality, you all die. Wow. That was a one. But we're not paying attention to any of these. Yeah. We're not paying attention to any of those alternate universe rolls. This is about the ten that Kaluna rolled. It's gonna take a while. Actually, one more full day, which will put you in the sixth of Estus. But you finally are going to get within striking distance of Kian. And they're going to start setting up dinghies for you to take to shore. And they're gonna drop anchor.

The weather seems to be holding. And you actually did get lucky enough to land on the side of the continent that this temple supposedly is. That being said, you still got some trekking. But this is really good. With your perception checks, and it's not like you needed to roll high for this, it is insanely cold. The fact that you guys brought all these warm furs and all that stuff is not just good. It is necessary for survival. You still will not be comfortable at any point. Unless you guys form some sort of large cuddle pile every night with a fire going and these furs, you're still going to be constantly chilled and cold.

Is that not what we do every night? I don't know. I don't want to tell you guys how you're living your life. Wait, is that a question? I just thought we were one big relationship. We're all dating. That was my question. Sweet. So, canonically, group three is dating. And you're fan fiction? Oh no. Don't encourage them. I'm 15. Hand holding. I had a question about our transportation stone. Hit me. Let's say you're standing in a meadow and in the distance are mountains. Can you look at the mountains and be like, "Okay, I want to teleport to the top of that mountain." Assuming you can see it close enough to make out trees or some shit.

Could you do that? Okay. Couple of things. One, yes you can see, but you're missing a lot of fine details. You've never been there, so it's more conceptual. It's like, "Well, I know what a mountain looks like." And even if you can see it, it's miles and miles away. But let's say you've been there. The risk in using the stone is pretty great. This tastes some real arcane mastery and concentration. Yes or no? Okay, I'm just trying to paint a picture because it seems like you have questions. I'm trying to give you some answers. Let's say everything goes fairly well and you roll pretty decently.

There's still the risk. If you're feet off or something like that, how perilous that could be. Just like teleporting to the top of a mountain. I'm not saying mountains specifically. You did say mountains specifically. Yeah, but I'm using it as an analogy for just any location that you can see. It could be the top of a hill. It could be the bottom of a valley. Anything you can see with your eyes. Can you do it? Technically, yes. It will increase difficulty and hence danger. Okay. How much of this continent has Barden explored? A decent chunk of it. If he had to give you a percentage, probably 40%.

Okay, so we can relatively assume that he's gotten closer to the seal or the temple than we are now. Yes. Alright. Let's convince him to come with us. Oh. Go right ahead. Alright. So I'm assuming he's not going to leave on dinghies with us? I don't think that was the plan. This is more... I think a lot of it was him downloading tons of knowledge specifically to Julie because those two, I would imagine, have just been talking this entire time. More Julie's ruthless pursuit of knowledge and just being curious about this area and more about that temple. She's really interested in checking that out.

So asking about the general area around that and anything about the environment surrounding the seal. So I think he was planning on staying behind because the money for him, it's like, "Yeah, I'll get you there. I'll try to get you there as quickly as possible and give you all kinds of knowledge about the surrounding area and then I'll take you back. That's what you paid for." Alright. But yeah, does anyone else think it's a bad idea or a good idea to try and convince him to come along? I think he's a guide. I think we need him if we can possibly get him.

I'd offer him double what we can get him. We can use him for meat too if he dies. Oh, he's delicious. Dwarves are pretty tough. Yeah, but you chew them while he walks. Yeah, Merrick can make a really good jerky out of that. Good idea. Alright. So we're agreed. I think it would be a good idea. But here's the thing, if Una and Merrick are discussing any of that, he would say he needs some serious enticement. He's not just going to do it. Promise him the world. Yeah, Una will just kind of wink like she's like, "Yeah, I know what I'm doing." So let's see. Okay. Dwarves do not like magic, correct?

Correct. They're not a huge fan of it. They're more about what they can touch and hit. It's more about physical weaponry and stuff most of the time. Okay, just making sure. Alright, before we leave, Una will approach Barden and just say, "I think I have an interesting opportunity for you." Do you now? It's going to take some convincing, I'm sure. But this is a strange continent. You have a lot of knowledge of it that we don't have. We could really use that. I think you know where I'm going here. I'm not going to beat around the bush. We'd like you to come with us and guide us on the continent.

Uh-huh. That wasn't really part of the deal. Yes, I'm aware. I just need to know, would you be open to it? Just not even talking about money, not even talking about compensation, not even talking about the pretty fucking awesome things we can offer you. Would you even be open to it? Well, here's the thing. I've been chatting with your friend and it sounds like you are all on a suicide mission. That's the picture I'm being painted. Would you say that is an accurate description? Look, our suicide mission is of this nature. If we fail, the entire world is going to end.

And if we succeed, we're going to be the people who save the entire fucking world. So, in a sense it's a suicide mission. But, in a sense, everyone's got an expiration date right now. Okay, well, that's not exactly a hard sell. I'll tell you what, I do get the vague sense that this is pretty important. I suppose I could tack along. However, I do have a condition. Name it? Let's say we all make it through this and we all get back home safely. It would be nice to have some folks spread the word about my services and maybe get some higher paying clientele, travel to some continents that I haven't fully explored yet.

Funding some expeditions might be a little nice. Una will just grin and say, "Believe me, if we make it through this and you help us, I will go into business with you. I will promote your business to everybody." I have some friends in very, very high places. And he knows where they were when they went to Umineiro, so she'll just give them a knowing look. And I'd be more than happy to get the power of the investment in Umineiro to be channeled into, honestly, the great work that you're doing. He's gonna nod, and then he's gonna offer his hand. Fuck yeah!

Alright, okay, yeah. Do dwarves do the spit shake thing? He doesn't want your spit. Okay, then Umineiro will not do that. She'll just shake his hand. Alright. You got yourself a deal. This is gonna look great in his portfolio. That was so much easier than I anticipated. Here's the thing. He's only kind of... Like, yeah, it's about money and whatever. He's gonna make a living. But there's apartments like, "I wanna see new stuff. I wanna..." So, anybody wanna do anything before you get off this ship and you officially set foot on Kion? No, let's do it. So, this is a process, but lowering the dinghies under the water and having the party on board with Barden, you guys are gonna row your way to the continent and finally be the first group on the show to set foot on Kion.

So, congratulations, guys. Suck it! Can we roll to see who was the first? It's fucking cold! Woo! Yeah, this is gonna be rough on you guys. But yeah, this is gonna be really cold. So, Barden's gonna start setting up and getting ready here and him and Julie are gonna be constantly conferring with each other. And they're getting ready to kind of plot their course. And I would like everyone to do me a favor and roll an endurance check. Time to die! Time to die. Good. N out of 10. Hey, not too bad. Oh, wow. Thantos is doing pretty well. Alright. The people with the highest endurance are all the lowest.

Good. Julie and... Thantos is wearing shorts and like, "It's not that cold, guys." I'm from up north, so this is nothing to me. Kolluna and Una. I'd say Kolluna a little bit more than Una, but it's really fucking cold. So maybe a little like teeth chattering. Like, just like, hand shaking. Just constantly trying to get your hands warmer. I'd imagine it'd be Extremity's first like hands and maybe feet a bit. But your boots are probably really good. You're outfitted for it. But there's something about gloves that just, no matter how good they are, there's still that chill there.

Of course, your faces, no matter how covered up, you're still gonna have to see. So there's always gonna be a little exposed skin or something like that. Kolluna is bundled up like the kid from A Christmas Story. Just waddling around in a T-pose. Merrick did that. Kolluna, basically. Here's another coat. Oh, here's another coat. Here's another coat on top of that coat. Oh, and don't forget your scarf. And your second scarf. Oh boy, let's see here. One more. Just round this out. Bree, why don't you do me a favor and roll a flat D20? I was waiting for you to finally call on me.

There's a reason. This is my moment. Oh shit, there's a reason? Huh? Okay. Fuck yeah. Best one so far. Come on. 17. Miracle upon miracle. Nice. That wind, after getting there, that wind just slices through you. If you've ever lived in the Northeast, something like that, there is a... Winter is not fucking around. It's just cutting through you. It feels like it's just... The wind itself is slicing into your skin. And that is gonna start to die down. And for the moment here, it looks as though the weather is sort of let up. It's kind of sunny out. It's definitely not warm, but at the same time it doesn't feel like the continent itself is trying to murder you.

So that is just amazingly good news. And it's gonna cut down on your travel time a bit. Because when you're traveling in Kien, it's just kind of... It's like, okay, we're gonna have to plan for traffic, basically. Plan for the weather to be terrible, and it's gonna be slow going and all that. So, I would like... Everybody to do me a favor and roll a perception check. Fuck yeah, keep this train rolling. Alright. Do you guys know what snow blindness is? Yes. That was pretty self explanatory. Okay. That is a real danger you're gonna have to look out for here. So, essentially, everything is just blanketed in ice and snow.

It is a brilliant bright white. As far as I can see, there are mountains in the distance, there are no trees to speak of. Nothing like that. It is just barren white snow. Now, the exception to that is while you guys are marching... And I imagine it's just heavy breathing. Just marching in a given direction. Barden is leading the way and showing you where to step, where not to step. Watch out for this, watch out for that. That type of thing. You guys are gonna start to notice, I would say everybody but Marek, is gonna start to notice that buried under all this ice and snow, there are signs of life.

Or at least where life used to exist. And the most, I'd say the most relevant would be these huge skeletons. Right? You could tell that instantly these are dragon carcasses. These are probably white dragon skeleton remains. Like they are, you'll find them every once in a while, right? They're really really really scattered. I'd say you'd encounter two during your journey. But it's kind of awe-inspiring. Like this thing is massive. Like the entire group could stand in its rib cage and have plenty of room. It is huge. Think of like a hollowed out jet. Like the skeletal remains of a jet just laying in the middle of this place.

And there'd be like icy ice crystals kind of like, just like dripping from the top of it. Just like, just coating the entire thing. And it would, it would provide a little bit of like resistance for wind if you wanted to set up camp in one of these or something. But it's really kind of up to the group. It's not necessary. You guys are going to be marching for three days. In that time, I am going to ask for each day, what would you guys be trying, like, okay. Just keeping warm and stuff like that. What would be like sleeping patterns and stuff like that.

Would you be huddled up as much as you can? Like a fire is just key. It's a necessity. It's not even an option. But setting up tents and things like that is something Barden would be doing every single night. Snuggling the fuck up. Yeah, I don't, yeah. I think we have to all like super naked too. Very naked. Yeah. You actually flay parts of your skin off to be extra naked. Naked and afraid. Sure. This is going to bring us to the ninth of Estus. And eventually, Jilly would kind of approach the group after talking with Martin the next morning. The third night you guys are camping.

Alright, huddle up and just sort of waving everybody in. I would imagine you guys are miserable by the way. Like, it can't be fun. The third day in this god-awful like frozen hellscape. I can't imagine this is fun. Kelowna was miserable the moment they got on the D&E's. Okay. Yeah, huddling up. Alright, do you see that mountain range over there? And she's going to point to a set of like smaller mountains. They look to be two, three miles away. Yep. Well, that's where we're headed. That's not so bad. Well, that's where the temple is supposed to be. And if everything goes well, we should reach it before the end of the day.

Anything else we need to know about this or are we just going to go straight for it? And she's going to say it. Again, I don't think the temple itself is going to be a problem. I mean, getting there probably, but yeah, the only thing that concerns me is it's the translation is really rough. It's something loose. Something about judgment. Something, some trial. Something. It just keeps looping back around to that and I don't really know what to expect. Everyone feeling ready to be judged? Yeah, Oona's pretty judgey, so I'm not really concerned about her. That was in character, right?

Yeah. Alright, Oona, give him like little finger guns. [Laughter] Kelowna's just groaning through their scarves while waddling in circles. You know that thing where you walk for so long that you know if you stop moving you can't move your legs anymore? Right. So they're just waddling in a little bitty circle. I would imagine it's just exhaustion too. Like your body trying to burn calories to keep you warm. I mean, jeez, okay, anybody, again, I'm from the Northeast, so is Bree. Just going out and shuffling snow for two hours. You're so exhausted. Like hiking in the snow.

Something like that. Now imagine doing it for days with no real rest at night. You're not getting warm at night, you're just getting warmer. It's actually easier if you're hiking through the snow in a group because you switch off like with birds leading the V. So one person goes in front and everyone steps in their footsteps. So there's like wind shear? So you're packing down the snow. Oh, okay. And then when you get tired you go to the back and then, yeah. Yeah, didn't know that. Still bad, but not as bad. Right. At least you don't have to like march. That makes sense.

You still hate your life. Yeah. I think this is all true, but I think we all know what we're signing up for. Yes. We just plow through. Yeah, let's make it to the temple of Vecna by the end of the day. Let's make that our goal and then camp and survive and then take care of this shit. Hours are going to pass. And eventually you're going to reach an area of the mountains where there's sort of a pass and it's shielded from the wind. It's actually one of those things where you didn't realize how loud it was until you reach this pass and it's like, oh wow, I can hear again.

Like it's, you didn't realize how much you were screaming at each other just to shout over like the weather and wind. But eventually you're going to reach this pass and it's this winding pathway through the mountains here. And after a couple of more hours, it's going to be dusk. But embedded in the side of this mountain is a fairly nondescript doorway. Picture more of an archway carved out of the stone, but it's very smooth. It's very, it's very well polished, but there's no door. It just sort of leads into the side of this mountain. Think a very large double door, but nothing excessive.

Nothing that would call a lot of attention to it. If you didn't know this place was here, you'd probably have a very hard time finding it. But there doesn't seem to be anything blocking your path from just walking right in. Uno will walk right on in. Yeah. Merrick will look around and be like, that's why we're here. Right. Okay. Bree would, if Uno was confident in it and, you know, everyone else was following, I think Bree would follow pretty closely. If for no other reason than just to get the fuck out of the cold. Because Bree weighs 110 pounds, basically.

Like she's tiny and yeah. Julie, on the other hand, would kind of like, I think she would be in full research mode and like looking around and like, hey, we should check for... And everyone's already marching inside. So she'd be a little frustrated at that. Should we check for traps? Well, you marched in. Wow. We're supposed to be judged, right? So just fucking just get it over with. Do me a favor. Roll a perception check, everyone. Maybe we were getting judged on our ability to find traps. We can find them with our bodies. It's fine. Maybe we were judged on courage.

That's true. Well, that's the temple of Vecna, not Kord. Judged on our ability to have spiders climbing through our faces. You guys are nailing it. Can't wait. Food becomes mouths. Izzy's laugh sounded like, ha ha ha. Really funny, Jason. Oh, good lord. Looking around this place and even Una would see this, this is a little more polished than the last temple of Vecna that Una and Julie would have seen. But it's definitely the same vein, same kind of style, right? And you remember how almost barren the last temple was being? Being as how these godly temples are usually decorated and sort of just sort of like there's all kinds of shit like all over the walls.

Yeah, opulent. There's traps and there's all kinds of stuff. This is not that. It's very minimalistic. We're talking like bottom shelf Ikea type of stuff. Like it's not, you know, it would appear Vecna is not trying to impress anybody. And the hallways that there are, there are, you know, there are torches there. They're not lit. But there's there's plenty of opportunity for illumination if you wanted it. Light them up. Yeah, OK. I would imagine the party would get to if for no other reason, again, heat and light. It is dark in here without the torches. So there is that.

But it also has pretty much the same layout as the last temple. So I'd imagine while the rest of the party is looking like they're seeing more detail, Oona and Julie would be like, oh, OK, this is like a Wal-Mart. Like when you've been to a Wal-Mart, you've pretty much been to all the Wal-Marts. Like this seems to be the same kind of setup. OK, nice. So let's head on to the frozen food aisle. We are the frozen food aisle. It is worth noting it is several degrees warmer in here. And once you get those torches, I'd say once you get those torches lit, eventually it might even be time to like put your hood down or something and just kind of like, let's stretch your face out.

Do that thing where you stretch your face after you've been like out of it, like you get out of the cold is like, oh, God, like it's just your skin's very dry and it's not pleasant. Theria needs to invent a moisturizer. Although I'd imagine something like that exists in Umineiro, but that's neither here nor there. Would Una be kind of leading the way? Because this is outside of Barden's jurisdiction. Getting you here was his job. The temple is like nothing. He's checking it out pretty much the same way you guys are. Yeah, yeah, I think, you know, we're going to be leading the way.

If he wants to hold hands, you hold hands with Bree. Julie would walk right next to Una. And after after a bit, you guys sort of take the walking toward this place and working your way toward the center of it, she would lean over to Una. Are you at all worried about what's in the middle of this place? Not really, to be honest. What's going to happen is going to happen, and that's going to have to be the thing no matter what. Choices are kind of out the window now, so there's no use worrying about it. Also, we're paladins, of course, so we should be fucking brave.

She's going to sort of glare at Una. Those of us who aren't stupid, I'm just thinking maybe it would be a good idea to get on our guard. I don't think it's going to be as easy as it was last time. Una will kind of like, her eyes will flit to...Julie wields a sword, right? Cord scale. Right, yeah. So she'll kind of like, her eyes will flit to her scabbard, I guess. And, you know, as soon as there's any sort of like, are we stopping for something? Una has cords fury out, always. Or at least, you know, ready to go. So she'll kind of flit her eyes over to where the sword is scabbarded?

What did he say? Sheave? Sheave, there you go. I was like, what the fuck is he? Yeah. Docked? Docked. Oh no. Sorry. And she'll just say, "I'm sorry, have you not been on your guard?" And she's going to look at you like that's...I don't just always have my sword drawn. Maybe you should. Okay, what if we round the corner and there's something to be bartered with? Or there's some sort of diplomacy to be had. Having our weapons drawn might not send the best message. I'm just saying, if things go south, then we spring an action. If there's something that's reasonable enough to diplomasize with at the end, it will understand why we have our swords out in a creepy-ass fucking tunnel.

She'll roll her eyes. And just sort of hold up her hand like that. You know when you're...you can feel a conversation get tense or heated and one person just kind of is like, "You know what? Whatever. I don't want to do this right now." She'll just scoff under her breath a little bit and just say, "Honestly, if we're about to be judged, we might not want to be bickering." Fair enough. Eventually, you guys are going to reach the center. And this time there is a door in front of you. It's a set of double doors that are sitting in the middle of this hallway.

What would you guys like to do? Merrick's going to take a little bit more care at this point because it's not as urgent to get out of the cold and get into some heat. There's some light. They've had some time to walk through here. And I think this is when checking for traps or just checking for anything a little bit off kilter would be important. I have a +14 to Dungeoneering. Good lord. Yeah, I don't know why. Yeah, let's do some Dungeoneering checks. Maybe she's just extra suspicious. Yeah. Let's do it. Thanos. Alright. Weee! It's fine. I would imagine Thanos is checking out the door and probably the surrounding door frame and all that stuff.

And it doesn't appear to be even locked. I mean, it doesn't appear to be a... If anything, it's almost for decoration, the door itself. It doesn't seem to be there to keep you out. Alright. Let's go. Fuck it. Party's going in? Yeah. I am. Yeah, let's do it. Alright. Everyone! Just for canonical purposes, Merrick is bringing up the rear here. Not to try to get out of danger, but actually just in case. Right. He's paying attention to the back. Right? He's watching behind them. Okay. So. I would like everyone to do me a favour and roll a perception check. Just for you to percept how judged you just kind of feel when you walk in?

Yeah, this room's very judgey. You wore those pants with that shirt. For a second I thought you were teenage. I did too. 0.5 seconds. Oh my god. I know it doesn't matter because other people got good rolls, but I rolled a 14 and it didn't count it. So now I rolled a 2. Well that's insight, so roll it again. Oh hey. Still better, but that's still insight. Why am I doing insight? I don't know. Okay, 14! Hey! That's where I was. Merrick's okay being judged, but he's not okay being criticised, so just be clear. Do the cosmic sandwich. It makes me feel better and it helps me process the criticisms more.

That's good. When you're talking about weaknesses, don't just say "Bree". Like, just do something decent. So this room is fairly large. It's actually probably the largest room in this entire temple. And again, it's pretty barren. Very, very spartan in terms of decoration. And again, there's sort of pillars around the entire place spaced out, so there's probably eight of them in this entire room. But there's this pedestal in the center of the room, exactly like the last temple. But it's sort of sitting on top of this circular kind of dais type thing. It's a little raised up off the rest of the floor.

But those are the only things of real note in here, besides the second half of the artifact that you're looking for. Sitting directly in the center of the room, on top of the pedestal. Alone. Wow. Merrick's gonna say... Completely innocent. Merrick's gonna say, "Well that was easy. What could go wrong?" And he's gonna go pick it up. Wait! He doesn't do that. Wait, he doesn't do that? No, I was joking. Okay, thank god. Dramatic irony. What could possibly go wrong? This is the easiest thing that could happen. And then pick it up. So we need a rock that's about the same weight.

Exactly. I'm gonna tell Julie to take out the first half. Yep, she's gonna get it ready. Alright. Should I run a dead engineering check on the pedestal? To see if it's... You can, sure. Cool. There's probably a good chance it's magically protected, but let's... 28. There does not... Okay, there appear to be no pressure plates, no holes in the wall where darts could come from, no flame jets, no fall-away pits, no acid, no dragon sneaking around behind poles, no nothing like that. A dragon behind a pole would be a pretty easy engineering check. It would. And I'm just covering all the bases.

I'm covering all of it. That's Peter the dragon. He thinks he's invisible. I loved Pete the dragon. Yeah, I mean, I think it's really the Una and Julie show because they know what's going on here more than anybody else. Yeah. If I remember correctly, the first time we saw a thing, we went up, we stared at it for a little while, and then I grabbed it. Yep. Alright, we'll look over to Julie and just say, "Same as last time?" She's gonna look around nervously and then shrug. Alright. She's gonna look at everyone else and just say, "I mean, last time, we just grabbed it.

Is everyone okay with that?" I think lots of shrugs. Yeah. I wish that we had a wizard on the party or someone who is smart enough to be like, "Maybe an Arcana check," but none of us are that person. Not a single one of us. I mean, I'm okay on Arcana, but... But I don't think that's something Merrick would think about. No. Nope. I agree. Let's go. Fuck it. Kill us. Do it. Actually, as I'm approaching that and stuff, can I do a religion check? Sure. Just to see if I feel any vibes. 23. I would say that Una is definitely getting the sense that there is... There's some matter of importance here.

There's some... There's definitely importance placed on this temple. Both temples were placed in areas where... Not every fucking Tom, Dick, and Harry are gonna stumble across, right? They're tucked out of the way. It would be arduous to get there. You'd pretty much have to know the place existed beforehand and have faith that it's actually still standing. And it's really strange that there don't appear to be any traps in the open or creatures guarding this thing or anything. Other than that, though, I don't think Una would get... I don't think there'd be any Spidey sense going off in Una's head.

Alright, she'll say, "If anyone's here to judge us, talk to us before Fry is alive." And then she'll grab the thing. The moment... And immediately die. Sorry. The moment Una picks up this relic. Almost like a pilot light is lit. There's going to be this large blue flame that... ...shoots forth from the ground. Not like a trap, though. Like more arcane, mystical. And it is going to encircle the entire room. So this would be blocking off the doorway. This would be... And the thing is... Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets. The thing is... The room feels noticeably colder.

Which I would imagine... I know Brie and Julie are going to start looking around like, "Oh shit. That's probably not a great sign." I don't know how the rest of the party would feel. Panic. I think that's roughly what I'm feeling. 'Cause Una's at that point where they're just so tired. They're just like, "Yep, this might as well happen. Sure. Why the fuck not?" Yeah, Una's just going to put the second half in her pack and just go, "Yep, that's about what I was expecting." And just kind of stretch with her hammer. Just get kind of limbered up. A couple of moments are going to pass by.

And then the group... Everyone do me a favor. Roll a perception check, please. The group would see this figure. You'd be able to make out an outline of a figure in the fire itself. And it's going to get larger and then step through the fire into the room with you. Almost... Not like it came from the next room. Almost like it came from the flames itself. And it is going to step into the circle with the party. And Una is going to recognize this figure. Say what? Oh, shh. This would be the skeletal face of the Angel of Death. Oh, hey, buddy! What's up? I'm fine. Hope you're not bitter at all.

Gonna hold a grudge. He is going to step forward. And he is... His head is just trailing on Una the entire time, stepping. Just like you can see where eyes should be. Those sockets are staring directly at Una. Why have you come here? I don't want to be rude, but like, duh! Why the fuck would anyone come? There are a few reasons. Yeah, okay. She'll make eye contact? Socket contact? I'm just going to stand up straight and heft the little artifact. And just say, we need this. That's all. He's going to step a little closer. Need... or want. It is need, right guys? Like...

Yeah, I mean... Hard yes, yeah. Yeah, definitely, right? This isn't a pleasure trip. This is very much business. We're taking care of saving everything. So, yeah, I think this would be a need. So yeah, I'm going to say, no it's definitely need. We'll bring it back when we're done with it. We're not going to sell it. Try not to lie to death. Right. You have risked much in coming here. And we're prepared to risk a lot more. He is going... to extend a hand toward Una. Not like a shake, but like kind of outstretching a palm. And sort of level it at Una's head. Hmm, just where I like things leveled at me.

I am not one to be trifled with, mortal. The last time you and I met... I was visiting. You are now in my home. I guess she'll just kind of like stand up a little bit straighter. God, it's like my instinct is to make sarcastic comments. And I think hers is too. But diplomacy will win out here. She'll say, "I'm not trifling with you. And thank you for allowing us to be in your home. And clearly you have the power to stop that whenever you want." You may leave with the artifact. If you pass my judgment... will you offer yourself to be judged? Again, immediately my thought was like, "Okay, yeah, but I'm really bad at math." Una will look, just flick her eyes... wherever the party is.

Just like really quick get everyone's reactions or faces. What do your faces look like? Brie would not be happy. Not at all. Julie would be like, "Yeah, that's what you gotta do. So do it." Yeah, you. You do it. Yeah, you. Go. It'll be funny. Thanos is kind of just looking between you and the angel of death like, "You two fucking know each other?" Right. That's French. What? Bardman's shitting himself. More like, "Ugh!" It's like, "Okay, this is um..." Excuse me, Mr. Death, do you have a bathroom? Sorry, go ahead. Marix just quickly, just gonna, just instinctively say, "Judge me.

Judge me." Would anyone stop that? Yeah, Una would probably like hold up a hand to like, just kind of like not stop Marix, just like to basically keep the angel of death from looking at Marix. And she'll say, "My friend is just trying to be brave. And I hope his affection for me aids somewhat in my judgment." He is going to step forward. Then I will judge you. However, be warned, Paladin. If your need is not truly dire, or you are not worthy, this will not end well for you. Yeah, she'll just like sustain eye contact and just say, "If my cause isn't dire, and I'm not worthy, I don't want it to go easily for me." He's going to spread his fingers just a bit.

And he is going to run his fingers through Una's hair, these skeletal... It's like one of those head scratchy things. Yeah, so these skeletal phalanges are just kind of just gripping Una's scalp. And then his palm is going to rest against Una's forehead. And then Una is going to tense up and drop her weapon. No! And her eyes are going to go black. Fucking cool. I would imagine this is jaw clenched just that. And the angel of death is just kind of cock his head just a bit and he is staring at Una's face. It's kinky in that line, no. Brie is going to... Don't attack him, don't attack him, don't attack him!

What is that? Don't attack him! Brie is going to see that Una appears to be in pain the second she drops her weapon. She's going to assume this is not... This isn't right, fuck this, no. And she is going to begin to charge her hands. Somebody stop her. And she's going to take a wide stance as her eyes go jet black. Santos, this is your time. Step in. Control. That actually, I guess it would make karmic balance if Santos tried to help. Yes. Balance, balance, balance! Yes, yes. Santos will kind of like, well okay, can I run a perception check to see if I can tell this is what's supposed to happen?

Based off of what the angel said and passing judgement and stuff, it seems like Santos will put the pieces together that that's what he's doing right now, right? He's not just murdering her. Right. You know what, do me a favor. And you can roll a perception check. Go ahead. To see if it's something where it appears as though... I would say this is kind of a toss up, man. It does... Okay. You don't know Una as well as Brie does. So Brie seeing Una drop her weapon is like, okay, nope. That is wrong. She would never just voluntarily drop her weapon. It doesn't...

You have no idea what would be going... Like, it's like, what does judging mean? What does that mean? But you don't know if it's going poorly and it's like, oh, is she being murdered because like this went poorly? Like, what does that mean? It won't go well for you. It's kind of tough to tell if this is part of the process in any way, shape or form. But it does appear as though Una might be in some pain. I still think Thanos would kind of reach out and like touch Brie's arm and be like, don't, not yet. Give it a second. My reason being... There might be a small part of Thanos right this second that thinks that Una could use some judgment.

I love you, Izzie. Thank you. Fuck yes. I was actually going to make a joke about Thanos being okay with Una being in pain. A little bit, yeah. Like, she'd rather Brie be safe than Una, to be honest. Yeah, no, that's perfectly fine with me. Do me a favor, roll a diplomacy check. Okay. For my hand touch. Do I get a plus one because Una's here? Actually, don't I give a plus one to diplomacy because I'm a half-elf? For my party members or something like that? Yeah, that's the... Anyway, I don't think I'll make a difference. 16. 17 if you count that diplomacy check thing. 18 if it's like a light stroke and she's picking off from that sexual diplomacy. 15 year old?

Come on, man. Brie looks like she's 15, right? She's 25 though. But she looks like a kid, right? I mean, not like a kid kid, but like... Well, this is getting creepy. The old artwork? The old artwork? Yeah. New artwork? No. Wait, new artwork? There's new artwork of Brie? You haven't seen it? I don't think I've seen that. Oh my god. Which is weird because I check the new artwork every time I see it come out. Yeah, no, she looks how she's supposed to look now. Go look in our page and look at the images. Okay, sorry. Yeah, continue. My bad. Anywho. Okay, so I think Brie would hesitate and look down at Thanos, but you can tell she is distraught.

Like she is... Right. She's taking this as she's being hurt and we should stop it. But she's going to hold off for just a moment. Right. Bias a few seconds with that 17. Just a few minutes. That's... yeah. At this point, Una's going to drop down to both knees. And the Angel of Death is just going to keep his hand on her head the entire time. And then after a few more moments, he's going to let go. And I would imagine this is just a reflexive, Una kind of dropping down to like hands and knees type of like, holy shit. Like that, you know. Yeah, definitely. He is going to look down at Una.

Take it. But you will return it after your task is complete. You will keep them at bay if necessary. If you don't return it, I will come find you. Are we understood? It'll take like a second for Una to get her shit back together because I'm assuming this was painful and/or mentally invasive. Both. Very much both. Like, mentally. Okay. Imagine someone breaks into the office of your mind, basically, and starts rifling through the filing cabinets and like looking through shit. And like, you can feel every inch of that. But it's like stretching out in every direction, every memory, every action you've ever taken, everything.

Just like, no, don't go in there. Oh, God, I have to relive that. Also put those back. Right. With the added benefit of it being exceedingly painful. Awesome. So, yeah, it'll take like more than half a second for Una to kind of get back together. But she'll stand up a little bit shakily and definitely grip Cord's fury. Like a little kid would hug a teddy bear almost, you know, like with that level of like, you know, getting comfort from contact with it. Mm hmm. And she just kind of like give give the angel of death a business like kind of nod and she'll say, I understand.

Thank you. He's going to nod back. Then he's going to look over to Brie. Oh, God. Oh, no. Hmm. And he is going to stare silently for a while. And then he's going to turn back toward the fire and march into it and disappear. Shortly after that, the fire is going to cease. And the way out will be open to you guys again. Get the hell out. Yeah. Una's going to turn to Brie and just say, yeah, I fought him to bring you back. And then she's going to just like not hightail it out of there, but like speed him, it speeds a lot. You know, we're power walking. We're power walking.

Move your arms. Merrick's going to get on his hoverboard and just go. Guys, I think that's a good time for us to stop for the evening. Dang. The next session we're going to be playing is the session for episode 200. Don't say that to me. I would clear your evening because I have no idea what's going on. Yeah, I got to hit up both groups and be like, guys, seriously. Was that not an awesome episode? What's going to happen next time? So shocking. That being said, if you enjoyed this episode, which you obviously did because you're listening to the end of it, you should go to the website, dandrpodcast.com.

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