Dig Deep

This transcript is machine-generated and may contain errors in names, terminology, or attribution.

[clinking] [crash] Peacocks. This summer, during the biggest sporting event of the year, Peacock turns to two broadcasting legends for the Olympics coverage you can't find anywhere else. Um, I think they mean us. Oh, [bleep] Um... [clears throat] With an incredible duo sure to take home the comedy gold, Olympic highlights with Kevin Hart and Kenan Thompson. New episodes Monday, Wednesday, and Friday, only on Peacock. Coming to Apple TV+ on August 9th. You're the Marine? Yeah. You the ex-con? Yeah, I did time, but you only got to cast aspersions at me. From the director of Mr. and Mrs.

Smith and The Bourne Identity comes a new film. It's your first job? I know what I'm doing. A little late for a crit change. Starring Matt Damon. Everybody in New England is after us. And Casey Affleck. Go, go, go, go, go! What are you doing? Taking notes. Taking notes on a criminal conspiracy. The Instigators, rated R. Streaming August 9th on Apple TV+. Howdy, everybody. Welcome to ARC 4, episode one of the Dungeons & Randomness podcast. Now, we've been around for a long time, and we've released hundreds of episodes. But we know that most of you don't have time to go back and listen to all that.

So, if you just want to jump into ARC 4, you are completely welcome to, and you don't need to listen to one minute of our previous episodes. We're dealing with new characters, new locations, new groups, and a ton of brand new NPCs. We really hope you guys enjoy this episode, and if you do, spread the word. Let everybody know what you're listening to, and retweet the episode. Whatever social media you use, just let people know you're listening. In each episode, we're going to take a quick ad break for our intro, and then one at the very end of the episode, before letting you listen to ten minutes of a random Patreon selection.

This time, we're going to let you listen to ten minutes of a Curse of Strahd episode. We're going through the entire campaign, but we kind of implemented our own little hooks. So, we're going to let you listen to ten minutes of character creation for that. And if you enjoy it and want to hear the whole thing, then visit our Patreon and help the show grow at patreon.com/dandr. That's not talking out of me, though. I'll get out of your way, let you listen, and again, we really hope you enjoy. Let's do that thing! Where we go around the table and introduce ourselves.

I'm Jason. I'm the Dungeon Master. And welcome to ARK 4, everyone. And welcome to Group Overseer. Let's do that thing where we go around the table and introduce ourselves, starting with Valerie. Hello, everybody. I'm Valerie. Two fun facts about me. What should I say? First fun fact, I like chemistry. Second fun fact, I struggle with depression. Wow! Oh my god. Dang. That's how you start. That's a fact you know about me. That is an ARK 4. Wow. That is... Welcome aboard. That's how we're starting. Jasper, what do you struggle with? Oh my god. Similarly, I... Is that the introduction for me?

I'm Jasper. I struggle with all of those things. And for me, because of this pandemic, time is no longer linear. It's all mixed up together. I don't know how long I've been in this apartment. I have no idea how old I am. I don't know what my job is anymore. And it's nice to see all of you. And Xavier. Hi, I'm Xavier. And I will be representing Canada for this ARK. That's a lot of responsibility. I know. Wait, does that mean we have to represent the US? No. Well, somebody's got to. That was my fun fact. Shit. Okay. What's your other fun fact? You've got to have two.

Oh, I love cartoons. Oh, okay. That's good. That's good. And last and certainly not least, Jamison. Hey, I'm Jamison. And I am left-handed. Really? That's the most tepid fun fact in the world. Me too. And I have a black belt in kung fu. What? No. Yeah. What? You wouldn't know it because it was a long time ago. And I'm very out of shape. But yes. You still have the split. Oh, my God. That's an action. That's literal. I didn't know that. Yeah. Wow. A lifetime ago. Man, we are learning all kinds of new things. I didn't do two fun facts. But do you have two fun facts? I don't think I have two fun facts.

I barely have half a fun fact. You just fax. Yeah, I'm right-handed, which is rare. It is in this group if three of us are left-handed. That's insane. Yeah. That's crazy. Yeah. Wow. Anyway, guys, let's go to Athias. Let's leave the mainland behind. And that's relevant because the first character we're going to catch up with is Linda. Linda has been on a series of progressively smaller ships, starting in Fairbairn. And for ten days, for a week and a half, she has had to catch transfers, starting in Rookwood, which is one of the major cities on Athias. There are three.

Emberhold, Rookwood, and Newberry. But starting there, progressively smaller ships from island to island until getting to Newberry and then having to take a slow wagon for two days, all the way out to a mining colony. Now, the reason this is taking place is because Linda got a letter some time ago and had to get her affairs in order in Winterhaven. Val, tell me what the letter said, essentially. So, the letter ended up actually going to-- was originally addressed to my father, saying that my great-step-uncle Larry, may he rest in peace, had sadly passed away.

And his business on Athias needed someone else to take it over. So, my father decided to ask me to take over the business, because, of course, I am very good at doing the business. And I was the perfect choice. So I also volunteered myself, because I really wanted to. And then I've been going on this journey. And as I've gone on the journey, I've--like, I started off with a really big smile on my face. And as it's taken longer and longer to get there, my smile has slowly faded a little bit. I'm still excited. I'm just very tired of all of the traveling.

Well, I mean, you think about it. So, you leave Winterhaven, and then have to travel all the way to Fair Bay, which is two weeks of travel by itself. Then slow boats from Fair Bay to--you know, that's a lot of travel. That's damn near a month of travel, all said and done. So I think anybody would be tired. But the Twin Oaks Mining Company is in need of some assistance, because Larry Wright, who was the founder and proprietor, sadly passed away, as you said. And I guess you were the best candidate. But if you could tell everybody out there how much mining experience Linda has, on a scale of 1 to 10.

Oh, wow. On a scale of 1 to 10, mining experience, I would put Linda at a negative 7. Okay. Okay. So there's a learning curve. Maybe a little bit of on-the-job training is necessary. Maybe just a little bit, yeah. How rustic would you say Linda is? Paint a picture. So, like, you come from Winterhaven, which is a major city, obviously, and you're on the road all this time. And Atheis is a little rougher around the edges than the mainland. And you're on wagons, you're on ships, then another wagon. So how out of her element would you say Linda is during all this?

Very. She, like, she grew up pretty wealthy. Like, her family has always had money. So she's definitely never done anything like this before. Especially, like, the, you know, this, like, wagon and things. She's used to carriages. So it's all a very big difference for her. Could you paint a picture of what, how Linda dresses? What's she look like? Oh. 80s businesswoman. Shoulder pads? Absolutely. Pencil skirt with a matching blazer. And she is just ready to do some business. And then it's that thing where, you know, like, she has too many suitcases. That's what I was going to ask.

Like, how much luggage? They're all just filled with rocks. Wait, really? No, would that be really funny? Oh, I didn't know if it's like, well, I minor in geology, so this may, like, I didn't know. She has too many suitcases just because, like, she doesn't know what she needs to pack. So she'll pack everything. And she has a lot. And they're, like, fancy suitcases, which I've never understood me as Valerie. Like, they're suitcases! They're going to be rough and tumble around. Why are you buying, like, $2,000 suitcases there to hold stuff anyway? She's that type of person, though.

So two more questions, and then I'll stop grilling you. So I picture Linda, you know, very prim and proper sitting here in this wagon being bounced around with the 20 suitcases in the back. So probably not sharing. Like, this is remote at this point. Like, you're probably sharing a ship with other people. And you didn't charter a private plane to this establishment. But you're definitely, as things get whittled down and whittled down, you're the only one heading out to this mining company in the middle of bumfuck nowhere on Atheis, right? So what... Are you trying to make a first impression when you roll in, or are you just so exhausted at this point that you don't care?

I think... Well, I think if they're finally pulling up to the mine, that she's going to have a renewed energy, because now the traveling is over and she's finally here and she can finally get started and start working and everything like that. So she's... I mean, she's exhausted, but she's excited. Okay. And one more question. Did Linda have a timetable? Like, does she anticipate staying here a few months, a year, a few years? That's a great question. I assume that she... that at least her first time out here would be at least a couple of months. Okay, that makes sense.

Sort of just check in on everything, see how it's going, see what needs to be done, what she can do to help. So I think her first... the first trip out here, it was definitely relatively long term. So as you pull up, this will be the first bit of civilization you've probably seen in days, honestly. From Newberry out here, it's like a two day trek, and you're on the edge of the woods, and you're going to see probably a couple of smokestacks, like spewing forth soot into the sky, and you're going to see some buildings. Pretty, pretty makeshift houses.

It's basically just to keep the elements off of people's heads. But you'll hear tons of noise yelling back and forth. There's a lot of activity. It's bustling. There's probably some excitement, like that first day jitters type of thing for Linda. And as this wagon driver pulls up and just gets ready to drop you off, it's like, "All right, final destination. Here you go, ma'am." "Thank you so much for all of your help. I know this mustn't have been easy for you, this big long journey. I really appreciate it, though." And she's going to take some, like a piece of gold or two, and give it to him as a tip.

Oh, a tipper. Oh, that's good. See, that's how you make friends. That's how if you know, so he's probably going to give you like his version of a business card. It's like, "Oh, if you ever need my services, I'll be in Newberry. You send for me. I'll be out here in two days maximum." "Perfect. Thank you so much. I really appreciate it." His horses are going to kind of pull way over to the side and give you some room. And there's going to be this portly dwarf. And he's going to be wearing this. He's going to be wearing layers, but this long duster jacket is filthy.

You can tell he probably spends a lot of time in the mines. Big red beard, and his belly kind of protrudes from from his tunic a little bit like he's got one of those hangy beer tummies. And he's gonna call out, "Miss Wright? Is that you?" "Yes. Hello. That is me, Linda Wright. Nice to meet you." And she'll hold out her hand. And he's gonna hold out a fairly filthy hand, honestly. It's covered in mud and dirt. "Leo Mackintosh. Leo Mack, to my friends. How you doing?" "I'm doing great. Pretty exhausted. It was a long journey, but I'm excited to be here and I'm excited to get started." "Who else did you bring?" She's gonna kind of like look at him.

And then her eyes are gonna like move around a little bit. "What do you mean?" And he's gonna point to the pile of suitcases that are sitting here. "You got- got a lot of stuff. Is this all yours? Is it you? This is- this is just you." "Oh, yes, yes. That's- that's- those are all of my things. Don't worry about it. I have someone that'll help me with that." "But I'm- I'm- it's just me. I know. A lot of luggage. Sorry, I'm that kind of girl. But it's okay." [laughter] This is definitely two worlds colliding in that I don't think Leo owns more than three shirts.

So to him it's like, "What the fuck is in all these suitcases? What do you- is this clothing? Is this like belongings? What do you have?" But he's going to essentially just kind of wave you on it's like, "Oh, yeah, okay, fine. Let me- let me give you a tour of the place. Come on. They'll let you meet the gang here." "Perfect. That sounds wonderful." He's going to start leading you back to this place. And there's definitely like- like an office- like an office building kind of. Think- think a four-inch trailer type of thing. But it's the nicest looking building of the bunch.

And on his way there, he's going to- he's going to kind of brief you on things. "How much do you know about the operations? I don't know what was in the letter, but we were told to expect you. How much do you know? What do you need to be told?" "Well, I know that this is a mining company." "Holy shit. I mean, yeah, no, um, good." And she's just gonna stare at him. Smiling, but staring at him. "Okay, um, anyway, the office is this way." He's kind of looking to dump you off on somebody now. Like he's- he's- he's like, "Oh shit, this- you're the one in charge now." "Well, um, again, I'm Leo.

I'm the operations manager. I basically, uh, I'm just organizing things, but uh, Cave's the one in charge. And, uh, we all kind of follow his lead until- until now, I guess. Uh, so, um, uh, Cave's inside. Just go- go talk to him." "Awesome. Thank you so much for your help." "Uh-huh. Good luck." So this- this little building. This little foreman's office thing. Um, when Linda walks in, Cave, what- what- what would she see here? So I imagine that Cave's office is kind of perpetually buried in paperwork. Not that he doesn't do the paperwork, or he doesn't intend to do the paperwork, but just that every time he sits down to finally get to the paperwork, something happens and he has to get up.

So it just kind of keeps on piling up. So I imagine just one of those offices where, um, it would be nice if you could find anything, you know? Right. The- the- the shutters are drawn most of the time. He's always looking for something, you know? He's probably actively looking for something when she walks in. Who would- so, would Linda introduce herself, or would Cave even notice that she walks in? Like, who would speak first, basically? I- I think if- if Cave is busy, like, scrounging around looking for something, I mean, Linda would just- would walk in and- and introduce herself.

So she would say, "Hi! Are you Cave? I'm Linda Wright, new kind of owner of this place. I'm really excited to be here. It's so nice to meet you. I heard you've been running things so far?" So as soon as she, uh, introduced herself, he'd kind of jump a little bit and then, um, as she- I assume she continues into the room as she's talking and he- he, like, shuffles away whatever it was that he was looking for. The whole stack of paper and tries to clear a spot of his desk. He's like, "Oh, uh, hey, uh, Linda, yeah, today was that day." So, uh, he wipes his hand off.

His- his hands aren't filthy like Leo's were, but he's got a habit of just wiping his hand off anyway and then goes to shake her hand. He's like, "I'm Cave. Uh, Cave Waring. Um, wow. Uh, you're already here. That's great." Yeah, so it was a long journey, but I'm finally here and I'm so excited to get started. Yeah, so that's great. Um, so did you, uh, you just got here- did you talk to, uh, did you talk to Leo? Yes, he's the one who- who brought me here and told me to, uh, come see you. Yeah, okay, cool. So he didn't really- he didn't really tell you what- much about, um, what- what's going on, right?

No, not really, sadly. Okay, yeah, that's fine. That's probably for the best. Uh, yeah, so let me, um- and he's kind of like looking around, like, padding his pockets, like, "Do I have what I need?" And he's kind of like thinking and padding his pockets. He's like, "Uh, what do you want to do?" Like, there's- there's lots of paperwork we've got to do first, but obviously we don't want to start with that because you just got off, uh, the cart. Um, do you want to- do you want to walk around? Do you want to see the place? What do you want to do? Sure, we can do that.

I've been cooped up in that cart for a few days now. I'd love to stretch my legs a little bit. Perfect, yeah. So let's do this. Um, if you have your bag, uh, I can show you to where you'll be staying and, you know, we can drop that there and then, um, I'll show you around. Okay, perfect. I'll, uh, go get them. Them. Okay, yeah, I'll help- I'll help you out. [laughter] So, there- when they, uh, go back out to get all of Linda's things, uh, uh, she- I- listen, I don't know how spells work, and now I don't know if I can do it, but we're gonna pretend- I don't know- can we pretend that I know how to do it?

Do what? Cast a spell? I want- I want- yeah, I want to cast Unseen Servant. Oh, okay, yeah, hit me. Would you let everybody know what Unseen Servant does? I can! So, this spell creates an invisible, mindless, shapeless force that performs simple tasks at my command until the spell ends. Um, and then there's a bunch of stuff about if it can fight, but, uh, it can perform simple tasks that a human servant can do, such as fetching things, cleaning, mending, folding clothes, lighting fires, serving food, and pouring wine. Uh, the servant will perform the task to its best ability until it completes it, and then will wait for my next command.

Um, and it can only be, uh, up to 60 feet away from me. So, you have this pile of bags, probably a chest or two, that type of big heavy shit. So, it's going to start to appear to float, like some of it, like in a clip, like here, there's a chest being picked up, there's a couple of bags, that type of thing. And if Cave shows you to where you're going to stay, it is a private bungalow. That is probably not what Linda is used to staying in. It has a number of features, and what we're going to do is roll for them. [Linda gasps] Fun. [laughter] I mean, Linda loves the sound of a bungalow.

Okay. Hold that thought, 'cause, but, let's see. On a scale of 1 to 10, let's see if we can describe the smell. Could you give me a D10, please? The higher the number, the better it's going to smell. Ooh, okay. Nine! So, maybe they stuffed this place with fresh flowers or something, I don't know, what do you think she'd like? And just kind of fill this place with things that would distract from whatever the base smell might be? Like, oh, okay, let's spruce the place up. Let's talk furnishings. Give me a flat D10, please. The higher, the better. I just, actually, I don't want to jinx it, I won't say what I'm thinking.

Uh-oh. Nine! So, I'm starting to get the sense that any money that these people had probably went to trying to impress Linda, I feel like. What do you think they would have purchased here? Because they would have had to ship it in for at least Newbury. So, I feel like there might be a new bed, there might be, like, maybe they nailed some pictures to the wall. They spruced the place up pretty decently. The base building is a little older, and it probably leaks a little, but there's, this is kind of nice. Like, this is pretty, it's still probably not as nice as a really good place in Winterhaven, but I think if you looked around this place, it's like, oh no.

What's my room going to look like? And this is pretty cool. This is incredible. So, like, it's really interesting because, so this is part of, sort of, Linda's first introduction to everything. And her room is pretty good. So she's like, oh, okay, like, I'm going to live good here. Like, I have my very own desk and chair. Incredible. A bed. It doesn't squeak. Amazing. Leo will probably walk up after a little bit. And speaking to Cave, but loud enough for Linda to be here. You break the news yet, boss? That depends. What are you talking about? Yeah, what news are we talking about here?

She's just kind of going to butt into the conversation. Well, and he's going to hand off a stack of paperwork to Cave. Here's the newest reports, if you want. I mean, I already wished her luck, but maybe she could turn it around. I don't know. Listen, all right. Thanks for the pep talk, Leo. Why don't you go wash? [Laughter] Turn back to be like, I'm sorry about him. He's all right. So this, and he'll kind of just tuck the papers under his arm. You don't need to worry about this. We'll deal with this a little bit later. Get yourself settled. We'll get you something to eat.

We'll have you meet everybody, and then we will address this. Don't worry about this. This is my job more than it's yours, and I don't want you to take that the wrong way. So anyway, and he has a -- I didn't describe Cave, so I'm going to do that real quick. He's like 6'3". He's kind of tall, thin. He's got kind of long-ish, messy red hair and a beard, a big red beard with his kind of upturned mustache. His clothes look like they were nice at one point, but they've kind of -- he just hasn't had the time to fix them or replace them, so they're kind of just like dirty in some spots, but they've been washed, but they're stained, ripped in a lot of places, but stitched back up.

And most importantly for right now, he's got a flask at his hip that he's going to pull from real quick as he kind of tucks the papers under his arm and continues to watch. I guess we're just standing there watching this servant go back and forth for a minute. Yeah, it might bump into you as you're standing in the doorway, but it'll just appear as suitcases are bumping into you. It'll take a second to go, "Oh, there's a thing there." It's strange that it's invisible. Yeah, so after a while he'll kind of stand off to the side, and as they're standing there, he'll be like, "So, obviously you can do that.

That's great, by the way. That'll be really helpful, I'm sure." Some of the guys down below are a little superstitious, though, so just be careful. Don't spook them, because some of those guys get spooked, is all I'm saying. It's fine, though. I'm sure it'll be fine. Oh, okay. Thank you for letting me know. I'll make sure to keep that in mind. Yeah, so let's take a walk. Let's go look around. Perfect. Sounds great. I'm so excited. Can I get both of you to please do me a favor and give me a perception check, please? Absolutely. Holy shit. Val, you're on point today, so far.

This is great. [laughter] Jameson, good game. I like your hustle. I'll see you guys in an hour. [laughter] So... Oh, boy. Linda's going to hear a very loud noise. And what it sounds like is... It sounds like screaming. And Leo is going to be heard kind of hollering. Cave is not going to hear this at all. Not with a three. He's probably talking about the cafeteria or something. Honestly, it might be white noise at this point. But it sounds urgent. Like this is pained screaming. If Cave was talking, Linda's actually going to say, "Oh, I'm so sorry to interrupt.

Is something going on? I heard some screaming, I think. Is that something I should be worried about?" He'll kind of stop and he'll listen. Can we say that if I just stop and listen for a minute, I'll probably... Absolutely, yes. Yeah, okay. He'll pick up and listen. Yeah, that's probably something that I should address. Listen, you can tag along if you want. Based on that screaming, though, I don't know how squeamish you are. Anyway, I've got to go. You're welcome to come along if you want. He'll start trotting off in that direction. She'll follow behind him and say, "Oh, no, that's totally okay.

If I'm going to be helping run this place, I should know what's going on." Yeah, so I'm starting to think he'll slow... He'll kind of match pace with her and be like, "I'm starting to think that we should have started with the paperwork. But hey, because we didn't, now we don't have to start over again." He'll flash a smile and quickly drop it and look worried and continue heading off in whatever direction that came from. So working your way through this little camp here, the entrance to the mines are quite large. You're actually sort of on the side of this mountain, and there's a tree line that runs along the side of it.

And there's essentially this massive ridged hole on the side of this mountain that has been reinforced with wood, and it is clearly the entrance to this mine. And the entrance to this mine, there is going to be smoke pouring out of it. And marching from the smoke is going to be this... Clearly a Warforged, and I'm saying clearly because this does not look like one of the Overwatch Warforged, one of the sleeker, designed for combat models. This looks to be... Let me put it in real world terms. You ever have a really old car that you're just kind of keeping...

You're just barely keeping it going with junkyard parts of other versions of that car? So like the hood is blue when the rest of the car is red, and that type of thing. But picture that in the form of a person. And that's what this Warforged looks like. And it is going to be cradling a person, like a man, a grown man. But the lower half of them is missing. And Leo is going to be running into the mine, kind of hollering. And then march back and flip over a sign. And the sign is essentially keeping track of how long since the last workplace accident. And it said it has been eight hours since the last workplace accident.

He's going to flip that back to zero. So as soon as we see the Warforged and the half a person, Cave's going to curse a lot under his breath and kind of speed up a little bit. And he's going to go, "What happened? What happened? What happened? Who is that?" And Leo is going to be marching along here with the Warforged at this point. Looks like Lenny. Lenny here was our previous demolitions expert. And Floss here pulled him out. We're going to need a new demolitions expert, by the way. Yeah, he didn't even do his training. Who let him in there? Uh, well, uh...

Leo? Look, okay, I'm watching other things. I'm not just... Lenny was fucking dumb, okay? That's not my fault. All right, well, we got to find out who gave him the dynamite then. Or what was he... All right, never mind. Anyway, Floss, can you... Find a comfortable spot for Lenny and come on over here for a sec, will you? Yep, so Floss is hearing that he's going to simply take the half of the body and just look around a little bit until he finds the closest wall. And he's going to not very gently put it down there. Right, not throw it by any means, but just...

And then just come right over. It's not going to phase him in any way. And he'll come back over to Cave and Linda. Oh, by the way, what time of day is this? I'd say it's midday, probably. Okay, perfect. Perfect. So Floss is going to walk up and he's going to say, completely as though none of this was happening, by the way, right? Completely, the demeanor is just, "Oh, hello." Mr. Cave, good evening. It's a pleasure to see you. Are we having our tea later? Yeah, we might need to. Hey, Floss, listen, there's a lot going on right now. I'm going to need you to do your best to try to recall what went down because I'm going to need to ask you what happened to Lenny.

But right now... Not a problem, yeah, absolutely. He's going to put on the fake kind of smile again and be like, "Right now, we have a very special guest. This is Linda." Linda is Larry Wright's niece, I believe. But anyway, this is Floss. Floss is our most reliable worker down in the mines and obviously also our best rescue. I don't know. I may very well be. I'm not actually sure about that. But Mr. Cave has told me all about you, Miss Linda, and that he's going to look over at Cave for confirmation. He'll do that like, "I didn't really, but not a little bit." Oh, no.

Well, then in that case, I cannot wait for Mr. Cave to tell me all about you, Miss Linda. It's a pleasure. And Floss, do you need anything bent, broken, thrown, or pulverized? So, Linda, she just kind of eternally has a smile on her face. But she's been staring at the person with like, frightened... You know that frightened smile where you're smiling, but you're really scared? That's what she's doing. So she's going to, sort of through clenched teeth, say... Still staring at the body. "Hi, yes, I'm Linda. I am Great-Step-Uncle Larry. May he rest in peace. I'm his Great-Step-niece." And then she'll kind of look over to Floss again and say, "I'm sorry, who are you again?" "Pardon me.

Of course, my name is Floss. I am probably not meant to be in this body. Is this your body?" And then she's going to point at her. She's going to look at him. "What I mean is, is this the body you were born with?" And he looks eager. "Well, um, yes, although I think my body has changed a little bit since I was first born, but..." Fascinating. Fascinating. Absolutely no reason to ask. Larry, he's going to look over at Cave again for confirmation. Larry, yeah. Remember Larry, the guy who gave you your job and he gave me my job and he owned this whole mine? Absolutely.

Mr. Larry, of course. Absolutely. How is he doing? Oh, he's dead. And he'll kind of look apologetically really quick at Linda and be like, "Ugh." Yeah, he, a couple months ago now, he died. That's okay. Linda's here now and we are carrying on. Yes, I am here to help out, replace the place of my great-grandpa Larry. May he rest in peace. Well, I can't think of another person who's more suited to take care of this place he's going to sort of gesture around than you, Miss Linda. Thank you so much. I really look forward to working with you. Fantastic. What were we talking about?

Oh, you know, we were just, what I need for you is, can you get Leo to give me a report on, and he'll point over at Lenny's half-body, be like, "I just need to get a couple words from Leo about exactly what went down," and he'll kind of point to the stack of papers under his arm. Be like, "You know, it's just a day's work is never done, Floss." You know what I mean? Floss will, in all of that rambling, he will have kind of lost the thread a little bit, and then he will simply say, "Absolutely. Mr. Leo!" and then he'll sort of wander off to try to find Leo.

Actually, as you're wrapping up things, you're going to hear lots of yelling back and forth, and I would say frantic communication is how I would classify all this. And Leo is going to come running up, and you can tell he's going to run up to A, excuse me, big guy, and kind of push Floss aside, and he's going to kind of cozy up to cave and try to keep his voice low. A quick update. Chuck and Gwen were also caught in that blast, but it looks like they're only going to lose a limb or two. But that means I've got to take them to the doc. Would you rather me just dump them in the hole with this guy, or do you want the doc to take a shot at it? [Kate] I'm sorry, what did you just say?

Linda was listening to that conversation. Yeah, Kate will just immediately pinch the bridge of his nose and do that squint as if he's got an exponentially growing headache. And he'll be like, "Yeah, so, you know what, we can turn this into a positive. Linda, why don't you wait here? Me and Leo are going to go get a couple of survivors, so good news. We're going to go get them, and we're going to take them to go see the doctor. This is going to be fun. Okay, so Leo, let's go. Floss, if you don't mind chatting with Linda for a few minutes while we go dig some people out of the rubble.

Oh, absolutely. And I found Mr. Leo for you, by the way, Mr. Cave. Thanks, Floss, and Jigsaw Jogging. And I realized really quickly, I didn't actually describe Floss very well, and I know you gave a little bit of an intro to him. Is it okay if I give a little bit of a physicality to this thing? Please! Everyone do that. So, Floss is about seven feet tall. He's like two meters, over two meters. He's absolutely mix-matched, kind of like you were describing this old car in a way, but it's beyond that. It's like the door is from an Aston Martin, the hood is from a Jetta, like it's completely mix-matched.

It's like almost contradictory, the way that this person is built. It's incompatible. There's big arm on one side and like a smaller, thinner arm on the other. They all work together, and it all sort of seamlessly, organically moves together. I guess that's the magic that holds the Warforged type thing together. But there's a forearm and a upper leg, like sort of not on the same side. Unlike everything else, which is metal, dark metal, and sometimes it's gleaming, sometimes it's super dark and black. You don't know if it's dirty or if it's just black metal.

But there's these – a couple of pieces of him sort of stand out because they're porcelain, or at least they look porcelain. And you know these Chinese patterns that are blue that are on porcelain vases or on like plates and bowls and that sort of thing, very, very elegant. That's the kind of pattern that's on his porcelain bits and pieces on a couple of places. He's got a huge barreled chest, which for his height, it kind of makes some sense. But everything else just seems like it just shouldn't be holding together. He also has a – gems his eyes, as most Warforged probably do.

But they're slightly different sizes. One is orange, one is purple. So it's all just this crazy mix-matched thing. And when he walks, it's – the earth will go boom, boom. Right? He's got some heft to him. And that's it. I'll leave it there. Which is great in the mines, by the way. That's what you want, is you want someone who makes the earth shake. Right. A really nice echo. Yeah. So if Leo and Cave are fetching the dock, so I picture the dock having this large tent. What would the dock be doing when they get there? I picture the tent is quite a way – not a ways away, but at least not within the living quarters, just so the noise wouldn't be a problem for the people sleeping.

On the flap of the tent would be a handwritten sign in a very bad handwriting that would say "Consultation underway." And there's like a tiny bell that's attached to the fabric. And as soon as – I don't know if they would enter or call out to the doctor? Probably call as we approach. I assume if we are going to the tent, we probably have the survivors with us. And in that case, probably also Linda and Floss along. So Cave would probably start calling out as soon as he's within earshot. Be like "Hey doc, drop what you're doing. Got a couple of live ones for you." Barely.

So out the flap comes a rather short tiefling and he looks very, very serious and he stares at Cave and just goes "Cave, can't you read a simple sign? It says consultation on the way." "I'm with a bad case of barrel blight down there and I don't have blood root on hand. What is it?" And he'll point to the person he's helping along who's got his arm mangled or something like that and be like "Well, Lenny set off a bomb in the cave." And "Well, here you go. Can your – whatever you said, can that wait for a second? And can you help these two?" "Alright, give me a minute." And he turns back in and you kind of hear him just whisper a few simple instructions to whoever's in there.

"Alright, take some of this and if you're still feeling the pine in the week, well, you'll have bigger problems then." And he comes back out and he's a really unremarkable tiefling. He's got this really – picture these really old vintage Victorian – not vintage but like Victorian photos of doctors with this old vacant look and everyone being taken their photo of. And he's wearing this bowler hat with two unremarkable horns poking out. He's got these wispy mutton chops, grey mutton chops on the side and a very narrow nose. He's got a very dark purple almost skin and he's wearing that – just like everyone else, this really stained white shirt with a little tie at the top of it.

But he's wearing a leather apron on top of it and this one's like all stained in blood. He's got all these surgical knives strapped to kind of like a utility belt almost. And he just walks out brushing his hands on his apron and goes like, "Alright, who are the patients this time?" So this is Gwen and he'll kind of like help her over and I assume there's an open seat or something within the tent and then he'll look at the other person and say – and this is – and he'll look at Leo for help. I don't remember. Chuck. Chuck, yeah. This is Chuck. How are you doing, Chuck?

Come on, take a seat. And this – and he'll point over – and this is Linda. Linda is Larry's great foster niece I think it was. Yes, great step-niece. Larry is my great step-uncle Larry. May he rest in peace. It's so nice to meet you. Do I just call you Doc? No, it's Doctor to you. And he kind of like turns to the two patients, Chuck and Gwen, and like grabs their mangled limbs as he keeps talking to you. Kind of like doing like, "Does it hurt if I do this?" kind of thing. But he'll keep addressing Linda. So you'll be taking over? Yes, yes I will be. I'll be in the place of my great step-uncle Larry.

May he rest in peace. Yeah. As this conversation is going on, I just want to paint a picture with words. There's lots of screaming and crying going on. And blood. Because they – like, okay, Chuck is definitely, definitely going to lose this arm. It is hanging on by a thread. And Gwen will be lucky if she regains the use of her foot. But since she's in the care of Doctor Chapman, probably will not. We'll have to find out, don't we? Yeah, I mean, yeah. Well, the foot's a write-off, right? It'll probably get infected anyway. So it's probably better to just take it out yet.

Like, already. As for the arm, well, we'll see what we can do. But let me roll a medicine check. Okay. Well... I'd say there's an 80% chance you might be able to save that arm, actually. All right. That arm is lost. We're going to have to amputate. [laughter] Yeah. All right. Oh, I got scraps of ash leaf in my tent. I'll just go pick them up. Kaiv, can you just put pressure on the wounds? I'll be right back. Oh, um... Actually, Linda, if you can help. Yeah, Linda, you don't have to. It's okay. Unless you want to. I don't know. I'm sure it's a lot right now, so totally feel free to not if you don't want to.

As he's got a hand on Chuck's shoulder, being like, "I'm sorry, dude." No, I'd like to help in any way I can. And if there's some... maybe some just, like, rags sitting around, she'll sort of pick those up delicately and try and, you know, place them against the wound to try and stop the bleeding. But nothing's really happening. So, Dr. Chapman comes back out with a handful of what seems to be a dried plant and a big old bone saw. He looks at Floss and goes, "Hi, old pal. Could you hold them for me? Just keep them immobile?" Absolutely, Mr. Chapman. And good morning, by the way.

It's a pleasure to see you. Are we having our tea later? Cheers, of course. And then he'll just grab Chuck. Oh, I love that accent. Love your accent, Floss. So this is the least comforting thing in the world, because you're approaching these poor people with a bone saw, and then these giant mechanical hands are going to restrain them so that they can't move. And I can't imagine the fear that is in the eyes of these two individuals, starting with Chuck. It's as gentle as it can be. I just want to be clear. Floss is a huge hulking- like shouldn't exist. But basically, Chuck would not be able to move, but it wouldn't hurt him.

He's just holding him. No, no, no. No, no, no. He won't move. Don't worry. It's more the bone saw that I'm like, "Oh, if I were Chuck, I'd be a little more-" Like, yeah, no, it's not- Okay. The reassuring touch of a warforged isn't exactly comforting, but the bone saw is the thing that, you know. Speak for yourself. Leo is going to approach. "Hey, boss. God, I don't want to keep piling on, but we got a couple more problems." Okay. Can this wait four seconds? Or is this something that needs to happen right now while we're literally sawing Chuck's arm off? Leo?

You know what? You got your hands full. I can wait a few minutes. I'll put it in the report. How about that? Okay. Is this going to be something I'm- I get mad that I didn't hear about right now? Or is this report worthy? Well, it's definitely report worthy, but I may actually have a silver lining to all this. Sorry, Chuck. That's not- It's- As you were. Cave is offering his flask to Chuck as he's talking to Leo. "Floss- Floss, well, Mr. Cave, I've got Chuck absolutely no problem. If you'd like to take care of this-" "Ah, you know what? That's- You do have it.

Thank you." And he will- Before Chuck gets a sip, he will take his flask back and go follow Leo. "Cave, hold on." "What? What?" "Were there any other casualties?" "Uh, yeah. Yeah, we're probably going to need help finding the rest of Lenny. Lenny is out by the entrance of the mines, or at least half of him, and the other half, I assume somebody's digging up and he'll glance at Leo but not wait for an answer." "Chime. Well, can you be a dear and fetch me what you can? I'll be needing it." "Oh, God. Yeah. Yeah, I'll have somebody bring- Drag him over. Yeah.

Just like shut her and walk away." "All right, Chuck. As the scene ends, all right, Chuck, let's go." Very quickly, before- As Chapman is asking about the other casualties, Floss is going to be going back and forth, looking back and forth as all the conversations are happening, and then he's going to try to catch Chapman's attention and he's going to say, "Mr. Chapman, sad news that Mr. Larry has passed away as well." He kind of does a double take as he's starting this, like, slowly saw and stops while the saw is in the arm and goes like, "Right, right.

Thanks for telling me, old pal." "Absolutely. Such a shame. Heard all about it." For context, this was months ago. Not for Floss. Not for Floss. I hope the new girl is more open to my medical expense requests. Who wouldn't be? And he's going to sort of just slightly squeeze Chuck to hold him a little bit tighter to make sure that the bone saw situation will go well. Yeah. She's got broad shoulders, though, might be able to help with the mine. That's good. I'm wondering if the shoulder pads are like pauldrons underneath of a fucking... I'm just wondering. The actual armor, yeah.

Yeah, is this actual? That'd be neat. Okay, so if Linda Cave and Leo are heading back to the office, Leo would start to give a full report of everything that happened. Okay. Okay, um, Miss Wright, you're probably going to want to hear this too, but good news, bad news situation here. Good news is we definitely lost Lenny, obviously. We got a new Demolitions volunteer. I'll tell you all about Cobb in a second, but we may have found something in the mine, thanks to that accidental... Look, we may have just found a whole new wing, and I think we just found ore, which is the first time we've done that in months.

And then he's going to look at Linda. "I mean, new ore. We've had ore, of course. Plenty of ore, but this is new." Yes, of course, of course. That sounds so exciting, though! When do you guys start, you know, getting in there? And she's kind of like gesturing with her hands. *laughter* You know, doing the whole mining thing. When can you guys start on that? Linda's takeaway is that nobody's mining yet. *laughter* Uh, well, that's more of the bad news. Early reports are that there are some things in the new wing. It's got to be cleared out, and obviously we gotta...

We gotta launch an expedition in there before we know exactly what we got, but we may have some gold. I mean, that's pretty good news, boss. 'Cause, did you tell her? Did you show her the report about how much we have? Leo, wouldn't you know it, it's been kind of busy since you got here. We haven't had a chance to really comb through all of this paperwork yet, but we'll get there, I promise. I will show her the reports, Leo. Okay, okay, okay. One more thing. Cobb. Cobb did a six year stint in Emberhold Prison for arson, but has experience with demolitions, so good news, huh?

Really wants to take over, like, volunteered. Like, we're still scooping Lenny out of the mine, but he's raring to go, boss. Yeah, so, Cobb, remind me, have I met Cobb? Is he... Yeah, Tiefling guy. Shortest, short, scruffy. Oh, loves to start campfires at night. Even when it's warm. Okay, good. Yeah, that's not terrifying. So, tell you what, tell Cobb not to touch anything until we've talked with Cobb, okay? You and me and he and Linda, if Linda would like to join, are gonna talk with Cobb about some new safety regulations we're putting in place. Okay. Cobb did say, and he told me to repeat this exactly, hold on, and he's gonna take out a handwritten note.

"I can save you money because I've been building my own stuff." He said you'd know what that means. Yeah, I know exactly what that means. Would you guys excuse me for a second? And he's gonna take off running. Wherever he thinks Cobb is. What would Linda be thinking at this point? Um, it's a lot to take in. She's already seen a dead body and she just got here. So... It's honestly probably good you get that out on your first day. True, true. She...I think at this point, she's gonna look at Leo and say, "Well, this has been a very interesting day, first day here." Um...

It's been 20 minutes, but okay. That's true. How about you and I get started on some paperwork? It sounded like there was a lot to be done, and I'd love to get a head start. He's gonna eyeball the door because it's like, "Oh shit. I was really hoping Kade would go over this, but okay." Yeah, no. Okay, well... As you probably already know, there's lots of mines in the area. And there are regulations that we all have to follow. We're all rated. We have a governing body that comes through and keeps an eye on things. *ahem* from Newberry. And we're rated on a scale of 1 to 100 on all this stuff.

So, um... That's incredible. That's a very large scale. So what are we at right now? Uh... right now? Well, okay. Let's start with safety. Safety... We had a run of bad luck, to be honest. Weather plays a part, obviously. And, uh... Inside a mine? More than you would think. Negative 43. That's really... it's circumstance, to be honest. Moving on. Workers. We scored a 15 this month. Well, that's not negative. No, it is not. That is exactly the type of attitude that I would appreciate you carrying into the rest of this report, please. Um... We've had a lot of turnover recently.

We've had some hits to morale. We've had some people leave. We've had some people carried out. Overall, profit is at a 10. And dropping. Quickly. And overall reputation is a 13. Okay, well... What I'm hearing is that there is lots of room for improvement. Now, you mentioned, like you said earlier, that we may have possibly just found gold. Yes. Very exciting. Very, very exciting. Which is good. Did Cave tell you about the bank account? What remains of our funds? No, unfortunately we never got to that conversation just yet. Okay. I don't want to step on Cave's toes, but...

I'm told you may come from money. Not to put it crudely. Did you bring any money? Yes, I've been very fortunate in my life so far. That's good. That's good. Did you bring any money? Not particularly. Okay, so, probably something we're going to want to work on. We have 1300 gold. As a... us. As an entity. We have 1300 gold. And that is probably, maybe, going to keep us afloat for another month. Maybe. Ahhhh... three weeks. Let's say three weeks. Yeah. Okay. And what are our current profits? Profits? Yes. As in money coming in? Yes. Ah. Um. Well, we had an insurance policy on Lenny, actually.

So that'll be good. Lenny had... family. So they're probably going to scoop a lot of that up. But, we've probably got like 200 gold coming in. So, that's something. And... uh... Vicky cooks. So sometimes we got hunters that buy from Vicky. So that's like... I don't know. Ten gold a week? Somewhere in there. But if you're asking about profits specifically from the mine... Uh... none. None. As of currently. None. Well, uh... what kind of things have you guys been mining? Like, what's been the most common types of ores that have been coming out of this mine recently?

Well, jeez. Years ago, we had it all. We... man. We actually were selling to dwarves up north, and they were buying tons of iron. And we had a pretty steady stream, until some misfortune. And then, you know, it kind of spirals. You know, you lose some of your best miners, and geologists, and... uh... customers. And then people start dying. And... you just start carting in... refugees. Who like to dig. And then... um... That brings you up to speed. That is today. Okay. So... What- in your opinion, because you've obviously been here longer than I have... What do you think is the first thing that we should work on? *sigh* Look, Linda.

Can I call you Linda? Yes, of course. Okay. We got a bit of a problem. Because no one wants to go into the mines when the mines keep collapsing on them. So we gotta work on safety. But the problem is, the safer we are, the slower we go. The slower we go, the less we pull out of the mines. The less we pull out of the mines, the less we sell. So... it's kind of a vicious cycle. If this new wing pulls through and actually has something worth selling... Maybe we could establish a customer base and actually start making a profit again. That would be just the bee's knees, honestly.

I mean, that sounds like a plan to me. And! Counterpoint to yours... The slower we go, the safer we are, the less people die? The more people we have to keep working. Okay, so you're saying... You want to focus on quality more than quantity. Well... It sounds like, as of right now... There's not much quality to begin with? So I think the only way to go is up. If that is what you are pulling from this meeting, then... Yes, that is exactly what I was thinking as well. I could send word north to try and get some new people here, but... We're gonna have to offer, you know, a salary.

So, let me know what you want to do. I'm here to serve, boss. How about I go get to work and get people back checking out this new wing? Give you a full report. How's that sound? That sounds incredible. Thank you so much. Of course. Bye. We'll be right back after these words from our sponsors. Please don't go anywhere. As promised, here is ten minutes of our first episode of Curse of Strahd Reincarnated. It's a show where we are going through the entire Curse of Strahd campaign with completely random characters. When a character dies, another member of the cast gets tagged in, but the trick is... they're not allowed to listen to the show up until then.

So, the exiting cast member has to fill in the blanks for just a minute and let them know snippets of their previous life. If you enjoy this little snippet and you want to help the show grow, please go to patreon.com/dandr and help support the show. Thank you so much. We really hope you enjoy. Let's talk about what we're going to be doing. So, obviously anybody who's listened to this knows that this is not our first crack at this whole Curse of Strahd thing. But there were some fatal flaws in our first run. One, people got attached to characters. That's flaw number one.

Never fall in love. Don't do it. Because you will lose that character and then... The sad thing is we had kind of a TPK. The good news is that is not going to save us this time. Because here are the rules for Curse of Strahd Reincarnated. Tonight, we are starting with Lisa, Kelsey, Mandy, and Ashley. Thank you guys for being the guinea pigs for this thing and jumping in. Now, we may check in six months from now. And you guys are still at it. Still hacking away at Barovia. Still working your way toward Strahd. We may check in in the next episode and have a completely new cast.

I don't know. But here are the rules. No other members of the cast of DNR are allowed to listen to this. At all. No other members. So just you four and myself. You know, Bree's not allowed to listen. None of that. So when someone dies, and they will eventually, you're going to tag someone else from the cast in. And you are going to vaguely relate your character's backstory and experiences in Barovia to them. And they will carry that information like a game of telephone. And reincarnate and roll a completely random new character. Ooh. And they're going to try and remember that.

And then, when they die, they tag in another cast member and relate your backstory and theirs. And continue the game of telephone all the way down. Because that information is going to come in handy one day. I can't tell you how, why, or when. But it is. A character's survival may actually depend on them knowing something that happened to a player that wasn't them. So I'd take notes, and I would try to -- You're only going to get a certain amount of time when this happens, too. And you're going to have to, like, stream of consciousness, let's go. You're not going to be able to cheat the system.

And what we're doing today, to kind of fix that "don't fall in love" thing, we're going to roll completely random characters. Top to bottom. Totally random. We're going to do some things you may not like. That's how random it's going to be. But I think it's going to help a little bit. So, to start, I've created blank characters with everyone's names on them. So if you want to play that, you know, if you just want to be Kelsey or Mandy or whatever, you totally can. If you want to give them a name, totally up to you. But I think we should start with Ashley.

I think Ashley should be the first one. We're going to roll characters straight out of the book. Our book, not Wizards. And there's a couple of things. We're going to start with stats. But this is how we're going to do it. We're going to roll right down the line. We're going to, you know, strength, and, you know, dex, con, all that. But whatever you roll for that stat is assigned to that stat. Then you don't get to pick. It's completely random. And I can see I'm losing Mandy. So I feel like that's the thing Mandy's not going to like. But we're going to work with it. >> I have nothing in mind for anything I'm doing. >> I'm just hiding inside.

Don't worry. >> No, it's going to be okay. >> I know you like to -- what's a dirty word? Min-max here. But I know you like to -- >> Min-max. I admit it. >> Mandy, I'm the same way. I am with you. We're in this together. We do not suffer alone. >> We could have used you at the book meeting last night. I'm sure you're going to -- I've got to post that. I'm the worst. I've got to post it. No, it was productive. Rob filled in your place. Don't worry. >> We need Rob and Mandy on every call. >> Oh, guys, no. Don't do that. >> It was nice. It was nice. >> All right. >> Ashley, are you ready? >> Sure. >> Listen to that enthusiasm, guys.

Okay. So I need you to roll 4D6s. We're going to drop the lowest. And this is for your strength stat. So let's do it. >> Okay. Wow. I just -- I don't know math. I don't know anything. >> Oh, no. Okay. Well, okay. That's a 10. 10 for strength. It looked worse than what it was. >> Okay. Now let's roll for decks. >> Oh, no. It didn't do the thing. Excuse you, sir. >> Oh, no. Oh, damn. Okay. So that's a 16. That's a 16 for your decks. I hope you get a dexterous class. >> That would be nice, yes. >> That would be great. Let's do con. >> Okay. >> Oh, no. We got an Anthem. >> Okay.

We got an 8 in con. >> Amazing. >> So I'm seeing it's low, high, low. And now you're due for a high one. Or -- that's a 9. That's a 9 for int. So I'm seeing a rogue in your future, hopefully. Like we're whittling down. >> This is just karma for killing off NPCs. Okay. Let's see. >> Let's do wisdom. >> Hello? Wait, why is it trying to roll 5? >> I don't know. >> I'm sorry. >> You're fine. Holy shit, Ashley. >> Well, that's a 7. >> Do it. >> The opposite of the firebrand rolls. >> So, okay. Let's hope you're really charismatic. Let's do it. Okay. Okay? 14. So your final scores for now are strength 10, deck 16, con 8, int 9, wiz 7, charisma 14. >> Amazing. >> Oh, boy.

So, okay. Here's what we need. Oh, God. I'm scared. So what we're going to do is we're going to get ready and have you roll up a random character. So give me a D12 and that will decide your class. >> Oh, we're not -- >> It's random. >> Oh, I thought it was just the stats. >> No, everything's random. >> I love this so much. >> Everything's random. >> I don't like this. >> Yeah, you and I are going to cry. >> I really don't like this anymore. >> I know. Look, it's -- I told you, you're not going to like some of it. >> Just the stats I can work with. >> This is to flex muscles that you didn't even know you had. >> Did the bidet stuff get in this recording? >> It would be weird to make a joke. >> I mean, it's in the old -- make a joke.

Tushy would be happy. >> Ashley, you're going to be a sorcerer. >> Amazing. >> Okay, your charisma's not bad. You can do that. >> A dexterous sorcerer, okay, just dodge. >> Dodge. >> Just get the spell sniper thing and stay away. >> Be outside now. >> Get shield. >> Oh, my. >> Man, that's going to be rough. Can I get you to roll for race, please? Give me a D20. >> D20. A 12. Oh, that didn't show up. >> Oh, I don't see it. >> Oh. >> You're having all kinds of problems. >> Yeah. It's okay. >> You're going to be a minotaur sorcerer. >> That maybe has an iron deficiency? >> It might work out. >> It might, I think -- hold on.

Let me see here. Race! I think you get a boost to strength. >> Oh, man. >> Hold on, hold on. Yeah, you get a boost to strength. You get a boost to strength and one to con. >> Okay. >> You're still at a negative one, though. >> You need to -- yeah. >> But that's okay. It's going to be okay. We're going to work with it. That's the fun. >> It's the fun, Ethan. >> It's the fun. So we're going to start out at level 2. >> Oh! >> It's not level 1. I'm trying to make this more survivable. >> Yes, thank you. >> Trying. >> I'm trying to make this more survivable.