Fun and Games

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[clink] [clink] Pickaxe. Coming to Apple TV+ on August 9th. You're the Marine? Yeah, you're the ex-con. Yeah, I did time, but you don't gotta cast aspersions at me. From the director of Mr. and Mrs. Smith and The Bourne Identity comes a new film. It's your first job? I know what I'm doing. I'm a little late for a crit change. Starring Matt Damon. Everybody in New England is after us. And Casey Affleck. Go, go, go, go, go! What are you doing? Taking notes. Taking notes on a criminal conspiracy. The Instigators, rated R. Streaming August 9th on Apple TV+. This summer, during the biggest sporting event of the year, Peacock turns to two broadcasting legends for the Olympics coverage you can't find anywhere else.

Um, I think they mean us. Oh, s***. Um... [clears throat] With an incredible duo sure to take home the comedy gold. Olympic Highlights with Kevin Hart and Kenan Thompson. New episodes Monday, Wednesday, and Friday. Only on Peacock. Howdy everybody. Welcome to a brand new episode of Dungeons & Randomness. Today we're going to be catching up with the Overseers. Speaking of which, the Overseers will be playing at this year's Theriathon April 17th starting at noon Eastern. All four groups will be there. It's going to be a marathon of a day. Seriously, over 12, probably more like 13 hours of content for back to back to back to back sessions.

We really want to see you on Twitch. We want to see you in the chat interacting with everybody. And we just can't wait to get together with you guys. While we're talking, there's another show that I'd like to tell you about really quickly and that's Dark Dice. So Dark Dice is a free actual play horror podcast. So it's very much about the psychological grind that affects players. So as the adventure goes on, players get weaker, they get frazzled, they get stressed. They put a lot of work into the sound of the podcast. There is a completely original soundtrack for it.

There's a whole bunch of editing and care and love that goes into it. So we wanted to stop and tell you guys about them. Here's the quick elevator pitch for their show. Six travelers embark on a journey into the dead pines to find their town's missing children. A sinister creature that can take the form and voice of the heroes infiltrates their midst. As it kills and replaces them one by one, the creature, now controlled by one of the players, seeks its next victim. For those of you who enjoy playing something like Among Us and want to hear a version of that as an actual play, Dark Dice.

Darkdicepod.com, check them out and let them know that we sent you. Obviously you can check out our Patreon at patreon.com/dandr We have been putting up a ton of extra content lately. I am running 11 groups. So if you want to hear Vampire the Masquerade, if you want to hear what we've been doing with the Knights, if you want to hear extra content in the form of bonus scenes and stuff we've cut from the main show. Honestly, if you just want a bunch of new stuff to listen to, swing on by patreon.com/dandr And without further ado, I'd like to thank some patrons here in the $20 tier and up.

In the godlike tier, Jane Dell. In the Monster Mash tier, we have Alex Swindle, Kaboose, Irish Wristwatch, Nikhil Sitter, Philip and Zudamandi. I just played a session with those guys and I think I'm going to put it in the main feed just so you can hear what one of these games is like. In Patreon Group 2, we've got Hannes, Jonathan, Mark, Nick Bortel, Rob Taylor, Ryan Haywood. And in Patreon Group 1, we have Brian Smith, David, Sheikhs, Dwarfgan, Mike Casalvara, and Ruben. In the Vecna's Chosen tier, we have James, Jason, Joel, Lisa Kanoy, Mandy, Mark Mathis, Nick Bernard, Samuel Carlton, and Taylor Omni.

And finally, in the Arcane tier, we have Alex Beck, Brandon McKenna, Brandon Rehek, Eric Villarito, and Michael Jay. Thank you everybody out there who supports us. We just could not do this without you, plain and simple. That's enough rambling out of me. We'll tell you about a bunch of stuff we're working on at the end of the show. But for now, we have to hear a word or two from our sponsors so we can get to a brand new episode of The Overseers. Don't go anywhere. We'll be right back. Let's do that thing where we go around the table and introduce ourselves.

I'm Jason. I'm the Dungeon Master going around the table stuck with Valerie. Hello! I'm Valerie and I play Linda Wright, the Human Bard. And Jameson. Good evening. I'm Jameson. I will be playing at least one more time, cave-luring the Human Warlock. And Xavier. Hi, I'm Xavier and I play Dr. Chapman, the thiefling rogue. And last and certainly not least, Jasper. I'm Jasper. I play Floss Valal, Warforged Barbarian, and Ore Extractor. So. We have a bit of a situation. Previously, you guys stopped on the road, I guess if you can call it that. And you met a lovely old woman named Murky Martha.

And she has a little hut out in the middle of nowhere. And as you got to chatting with her, you found out that she's part of this old druidic order that has been sacrificing people to keep the trees in the area from taking vengeance upon people on a big scale. And she only needed like one, maybe two more people, probably just one more, though. And, well, you refused to give her somebody, and so the trees themselves have ripped this little hut apart and have begun attacking. We've already rolled initiative. I... before we get into it, how have you guys been feeling for the last month waiting for this session to happen?

Because it's not the best way to leave things, but we just had no time. I've been constantly thinking about this, all the many possible outcomes. I... Dr. Chapman has ideas. I'll just leave it at that for me, but man oh man, am I anticipating this whole deal. It's been a long month. It's been a long time to wait. Yeah. God. Shall we begin? Let's do it. Alright. I'm really... honestly, I never get this worked up about playing at all. I think... And I really feel like this is going to be very not good. For a month you've been saying like, "I'm not good at D&D, guys.

I don't know how to play D&D." What's this doing to you? No, because I really think we're going to be rolling characters in like half an hour. Wow. See, Jasper, that's my line. I'm the one who doesn't know how to play D&D. It's not about not playing D&D. It's just... what did we get ourselves into completely? But anyway, I'm excited worked up, but I'm also nervous worked up. I'm truly anxious about this, but in a good way. Alright, let's go. Let's do it. Let's do it. We'll prove you wrong. I hope to be proven every which way. Let's go. Well, we're kicking things off with the boss.

The lady in shoulder pads. Let's go with Linda. Linda, what do you want to do? Well, if we remember from the end of last session... Mm-hmm. I said that I was going to help everybody. I said something like, "Everyone get together!" I don't know. Because I was going to cast Leomans Tiny Hut, which is my favorite name for a spell ever. And it's a dome of force. Nothing can be cast through it. And the inside space is comfortable and dry. You can't move through... wait. Oh, creatures and objects within the dome when you cast a spell can move through it freely, but spells and projectile attacks cannot exit.

Yes. Um... There's just one tiny problem with that. What's that, Jason? Tell the audience. Well, the casting time is one minute, which would be ten rounds. That is true. So, I guess my question is, do you think this fight is going to go ten rounds? I think we may be dead before ten rounds. But that's pretty funny. Everyone fighting while Linda's trying to cast this spell, but we all die before she's able to cast it. That's hilarious. It's not not funny. I will remind you, you are the only healer in the party that I would believe. I take offense to that. Well, I mean... magical healer.

That's true. That's true. Okay, you know what I'm gonna do? What are you gonna do? I think I'm gonna delay my turn. Okay. And see how badly other people get hurt. Okay. Do I have to... do I just let you know when I want to jump back in, or do I have to tell you right now? No, no, no, no. You can let me know the second... like, it's like, "Okay, I'm jumping back in." If things get bad, feel free to jump back in. Yeah. Okay, cool. Then I'll do that. So there's a variety of plant life here. We'll file it under "aggressive plant life." And there's these little twig blights.

Those are the things that are closest to you. These entangled mass of vines. I'd say they're about three, three and a half feet tall. Basically living brambles. And one of them is just gonna run up here to Linda. And target. And then use claws. And... oh, damn, that was almost a three rolled over to a 19. That's a 22. So these things don't hit too hard. Four damage. That's not great. Not bad. But there's another twig blight in here, and that's gonna run on up to Floss and try the same shtick. Oh, seven's gonna miss though. And that'll bring up cave. See? This is going great.

So if I glance over at Marky Martha, what's she doing? She's... She's like freaking out? I mean, she's not happy. She's more like... My heart! She's much more like that. Like it's like, "Ah, come on. Like you just... it didn't have to come to this. Just one of you. That's all I wanted." Okay, so... Cave sees Linda get attacked, and as far as Cave is concerned, Linda's a non-Kabatian. Like she's just the boss. So he's gonna like raise his voice to Martha, but just kind of... As he's rushing over in the direction towards Linda, he's gonna be like, "Call him off!

Call them off!" And he's running over here. And I'm going to Eldritch Blast this twig blight twice. So as he's doing it, his eyes start to flare up, and he's like... The urgency in his voice is both because "Oh shit, oh shit," but also it's starting to burn, right? Yeah. I hate having to do this, but we're gonna do it. So we're gonna select this guy. I didn't move. Why didn't it move me? The tokens were locked on the thing. It's fixed now. Oh, okay. The default for every map is to just lock everybody down, and I don't know why that's the default. That's weird.

I can fix it. I'm all I get. So we have... Oh, the first thing I'm gonna do... I'm gonna Hex this thing. Okay. So I haven't done this yet, but we're gonna cast Hex on it. So Hex... Place a curse on a creature that you can see within range. Until the spell ends, you deal an extra 1d6 necrotic damage to the target whenever you hit it with an attack. Choose one ability when you cast the spell. The target has disadvantage on ability checks made with the chosen ability. Okay. So I'm gonna choose Dexterity. Anything it does involving Dexterity, it's gonna have disadvantage.

Okay. And then when it dies, I can move the Hex to a different target. We're gonna go ahead and Hex this thing. We're gonna hit it twice. Like this. Oh, that was almost a 20. 15 will hit, though. 15 will hit. I'll take it. So now we're gonna do damage. Oh, that'll kill it! Oh! Okay. Yeah! What? This little entanglement of brambles, I imagine it's like this big dead shrub. It's just beating Linda with, so that's all the scratches. Like these little rose stem type things. So her power suit might get little tears in it, something like that. I'm sorry, it's the nature of the biz.

But this thing is super dead and gone. It's just gonna crumble. That is good. So what I'm gonna do, I'm gonna sort of, just like before when we were fighting the badgers in the cave, he doesn't really stop blasting one thing and then start blasting another thing. He just whips the lasers in a different direction. And just kinda out towards the woods, 'cause there's shit going on out there that he doesn't like or trust. Yeah, as you look, you got the little rose bush things, and then they get progressively bigger until in the back is just full grown fucking oaks walking toward you guys.

Yeah, that's kinda terrifying. Yeah, so we're gonna, I can't move the hex this turn 'cause I just did it as a bonus action. So we're just gonna target the awakened tree number one. And we're gonna blast that guy. Alright. So here we go. Hey! Ooh, 26. That was almost a roll. And here's the damage. That was an attack. Wait, that was another attack. Are you sure I can't do 22 damage? Ugh, six damage. Six, you know, 22, it's all the same. Yeah, you know, the numbers. And that's my turn. Fantastic. One tree thing down. You've basically won this fight. Doc Chapman! Uh, Chapman doesn't look scared per se.

Definitely it has a look of concern in his face. Looking around like hearing all the trees moving around the camp in the darkness. And he'll turn to Martha and he'll tell her, he'll shout to her. Is this about me bumping into you? I was just trying to tell you I found a new solution. Another proposal so you didn't have to kill Linda. Call your trees off and hear me out. I'm gonna have her respond on her turn. By the way, that's a lie. Like, he was trying to kill her. Oh yes, no, I know. Do you wanna try to deceive with that? It's up to you. I was ready for deception.

Give me a deception. Oh! Damn. Well that's a crit, everybody at home. That's a 28. You're already a good liar and then you... Well, you splice in some truth. He does have another plan in mind. The knife between your ribs was just to drive that home. What knife? There was gonna be a knife. Well, what's your plan? Uh... do you want me to tell you or like to tell Martha? I mean, she's gonna respond on her turn. The plan is, I don't know if the sacrifice requires killing per se or just limbs and blood. Oh. She did... she was very specific about the ritual. She just needed some limbs.

I found a torso with a head attached. She needed some blood to be smeared. How many limbs we talking? How many you got? Well, across all of us. Oh. We'll see what Martha says. Oh! Oh, God. Oh, man. Okay. Wow. I didn't even think about that. Well, what would you like to do on your turn? Oh, if you're allowing me to do something on top of that? Yeah, go, go, go. Oh, then he'll just quickly swoop in next to our friend Floss and just slash at the bramble. I'm gonna try to like take it down the twig like number one. So I'm gonna see if I hit the first. With the short sword.

Oh, 14 will hit. Sweet. That'll be a sneak attack. Let me add that and do the damage. This thing's so fucking dead. It's not even funny. It's so dead. Instant death. Cool. And I'll use the rest of my movement to move back next to Linda. Okay. That's my turn. And then I guess he would do that and then yell the whole thing to Martha. Right. She's got her arms folded at this point. Like, look at the mess you've made. That type of thing. She's not worried so much about these trees, at least for her. They're not my trees. I told you all I needed was a sacrifice and that I was going to scatter some limbs.

You're the one who made this much more complicated. And she's going to hear the part about like, how many how many limbs do you need? I need at least. I need at least four and well, a lot of blood. Okay. Chapman will like not. Mm hmm. Mm hmm. And she's that's her turn. Like she's not she doesn't wish you ill. But I think I think at the end of it's like, do we have any volunteers? One of you just needs to go. Like she's very like very pragmatic about this. It's like, look, it's you know. I don't know if I could respond or not. And this I don't want to take too much time for my turn.

So even my turn more. We'll come we'll come back to you. Perfect. We do have a horse that has limbs. Technically, it's got to be a person. If it were animals, that'd be so much easier. Wouldn't it? Wouldn't it? OK. Floss is taking all of this in, just basically standing there and just watching all of this happen very quickly. Almost just in a very very normal, curious way. And and after all that, that discourse between Martha and Chapman, he's going to look around at this, the the invading vegetation. And he's going to stride up to this assassin vine. Can you can you give a little description right now about the assassin vine?

But apart from the trees? Yeah. So the at the at the end of the last episode, I I kind of painted a picture of these vines bursting up in the ground. So what they do is they're still attached to the ground, but they'll also wrap themselves around the nearest standing structure, like fence posts and stuff like that. And any of the the longer vines in the middle will just stand there and just whip and grab and pull and rip apart and stuff like that. They're really strong. So, yeah, these things are these these are a bit nastier than the twigs. I mean, this is with that in mind, particularly, he's going to walk directly up to where this vine is, wherever he feels like the central portion is.

He's going to say, stop it. I have seen next to no plants in the last several months, at least. And now you all want to kill me and my friends. And he's going to absolutely he's going to start slashing with his pickaxe. I guess that's fair. Yeah. And I don't know if I'm hitting the right buttons. Give me a second. Oh, stop it. No, no, I really don't know if I'm hitting the right buttons. Oh, target the zap. But great on it. Here we go. Oh, yeah. And rage, by the way. I mentioned rage. Well, he seemed to be sectioned. I'm sorry. He seemed upset at least. Oh, no, absolutely.

So as he's walking up towards this this assassin vine, so you're going to start hearing as he's as he's doing this, these frustration moments, this machine is starting. And so this is his rage kicking in, for sure. And I'm also going to go ahead and invoke Frenzy, which is going to take place on the next round because it takes around to get into it. One sec. Yeah. There you go. You have rage now. Thank you very much. And I will now. Attack. Oh, 24, I'll hit. And damage 15 damage. All right. So that's attack number one. So I can actually do another attack as well.

So he's going to go straight for it. I'm just going to be two attacks. Shit. That's almost a crit. Twenty seven. Thirteen damage. And he's oddly focused on this particular vine and basically like he's offended that this is happening. And that's it. That'll end his turn. The big boys in the back. I always picture these waking trees like real Mortal Kombat to living forest, like rotted out, angry, like I don't know why. I just I always get that vibe. Good and bad news. Good news is they are too large to go through the opening of this fence. But what their roots are going to do is just kind of like tippy toe and step over the fence.

So all bad news, you're saying? Yeah. The good news really doesn't. Well, the good news is the fence will not get wrecked. OK, good. It's no structural damage. Make sure Martha is very aware. So let's boom. So we OK, here we go. Let's target cave. Cave tours are in a mother. Your fence is fucking useless. So it's the whole top of this tree. It's almost like it's going to it looks like a dozen arms coming down on cave. And it's just going to. Oh, wow. It's going to. Huh? Hold on a second. This would target Linda and Chapman, too. It's got a reach of 10. Well, reach isn't like that's just spread.

I like it. I got to read. You could reach me, but he still has one target. It is one target. OK, never mind. I don't like any of this, by the way. Yeah, that's fine. That's fine. So let's just do damage. Not wow. There's wow. Two ones and a three nine damage. And that's it. Awakendree number two. He's going to move right here. Target floss. Get advantage. Slam. Oh, 22. We've had no crits, no crit hits, no crit fails so far. That's great. Oh, shit. 19 damage to floss. 19? But the effect has reduced it. Oh, it is half. Yeah, you're right. So thank you. It is 19 damage, but partially resistant.

So thank you very much. Yes. So nine damage. Assassin's Vines standing right in front of you is going to target floss. There we go. And I guess let's do constrict. 20. So we're going to do a nine damage, partially resistant, and you are grappled. Love it. So you just got to try and get out of that and. Yeah, easy, easy peasy. Vine blight. Oh, my God. Oh, can Linda come in for her turn now? Absolutely. You can. Perfect. So I found out, which is very exciting, that healing word is actually a bonus action. So like I can do a thing and healing word on my team on my turn, which is news to nobody except me.

But it's kind of exciting. It's a caveat that you couldn't use another spell unless it's a cantrip, though. I'm known for saying this. That's OK. That doesn't stop what I wanted to do. Sick. So I will first I'm going to hit the awakened tree with my dagger. Because I'll carve your name into it. What do you I will because you said it's like the arms on the tree coming down, right? I'm going to pretend like my dagger is almost like. I guess like a machete. Well, that's not a dagger anymore. I know. But I'm going to. Oh, that's true. Daggers pierce. I just wanted to like trim the hedges.

But can I do that? I just want to like wave it in front of me. So I get like a shield and then as things come through, they just get cut. I don't know if that's going to work with like an oak tree, but let's see. Let's see how much damage you can do. OK. Am I? Oh, I am targeting it. OK. And so I'm because there's a melee and a throw and I should do the melee. Yeah, I wouldn't just throw it like you can. But you also get a plus two because you're standing next to cave. I was thinking about that and then I forgot to ask. A twenty will hit. See? It'll do something.

Four damage. Perfect. Partially resisted. So. Oh, good. So then as a bonus action, I'm going to do healing word. On floss, because even though he has more HP overall, he's, I think, going to get hit some more by the other things because he's the farthest out. Sure. So. Of course, you're my boy. I don't actually don't think there's anything to cast, but there is. I don't have a button. I mean, if you click the magnifying glass, that might open a subfolder. Look at that. It does. How exciting. The spells. They're cool, aren't they? And I'll just do first level. Yeah.

So I'll cast healing word on floss and I'll say, make sure your parts don't get. You know. Wow. I'd like to think that this is all in real time. This is this is Linda's first combat. Yep. Every day, including the awakened trees, like stop and stare at her. See what she's saying. Like, wait, what? You know, you know, your your limb joints and like you don't want branches stuck in there. Then you'll you know, so make sure you clear those out. Yes. That's what Linda says to floss. Everyone stops and it's like, but Dory Linda has really high charisma. So like it comes off like super smooth floss feels very, very happy about this.

Hey, for Max healing. I'll take it. Thank you, Linda. Doesn't that come with your modifier? I. Yeah, it's I think it's one d four plus your spell casting ability modifier, which I checked. It is six. Probably not, though. What's your charisma? Three. Plus three. OK. So it's your proficiency plus your charisma. Not on the not on the heat, is it not only not for the healing, just for the attack. Yeah, it's the same as like when you do damage with a dagger, you will you get your like your Dex bonus, but not the proficiency with the weapon. Oh, it regains hit points equal to one d four plus your spell casting ability modifier.

Wait. Yeah. But then I look at what the. So that's seven. I just I just fixed the formula. So next time you cast it, it'll be right. And I'm going to give. Oh, so spell casting ability modifier is just. Your career, whatever, whatever, whatever ability score you're drawing off of to cast spells. So that's charisma for you. Oh, OK. Gotcha. That that makes sense. OK. Sorry, I'm new to spells. I don't know. You're fine. It's all good. It's a prerecorded chip. Still better than Jasper. Yeah. You guys have a few weeks to learn all this and get it down because everyone's going to play live on Theriathon.

And then like you guys would be all professionals and it'll be great. And we can always use the excuse. Oh, we've been sitting here for 12 hours. It's fine. No matter when you guys play. Vine blight. Fine, blight can only move 10 feet, so it's just going to move up a little bit and then it's it's the last awakened tree, which is going to move up. And that's as far as it can move. Re-rolling. We got Linda. OK, well. She just did some stuff. She did. I was there. Why not? We're going to do healing word again on cave this time. And she's going to say. To cave. I'm keeping all the silence in.

OK, she's going to say to cave. I just got to the mine. I need you here to help me along to run this place. Please don't die on me. And it was extremely charismatic, I swear. Help me help you. He's in the middle of screaming while shooting. I blast. Thank you. I'm doing my best. And Max healing. That's the second time in a row you've rolled Max healing. So I don't think it's about whatever you say. I think I think I'm just saying really good stuff. And then I'm going to do more of my wave my dagger around and hope it does something. OK. At the tree. You get a plus two.

Don't forget. Oh, OK. Yeah. You're a weapon when we get to town. I know I have a dagger. Like this is this is fine. Linda's a boss lady. Like she doesn't need. When are you ever going to fight? Awakened tree one. OK. And then we go to dagger. Hiya. 15 will hit. That's right. I mean, max damage, partially resisted. That's that's three. That sounds pretty good to me. Eventually you're going to chop this thing down. I tried doing that once. Have you ever tried to take a hand like an ax, just like a regular sized ax and try and chop a tree down? I have. It turns out it's very hard and takes a long time.

And also you get blisters on your hands. And also you probably have to be a little stronger than I am to do anything. And then try it with a knife. That's something I would do. I'd be like, no, no, mom, we can't cut this tree down. I will do it with a knife. Don't you worry. OK. Oh, God. Vine blight is going to move right there and target floss. Bring it on. It's OK. I don't mind. Oh boy. Yep. Target floss. And it's going to get a plus two. You're already restrained or grappled, so that's cool. It can't do that to you again. So it's going to attack. 17 will hit. Oh, minimum damage.

So that's for partially resistant. So we did two damage. It was like little. Floss is just I mean, if you're just watching it, he is more and more annoyed at the situation. That's all. That's all I get that. This awakened tree. Is going to stop targeting cave and start targeting Linda because. Wait, I'm sorry, when did when did Linda get wounded? Did she hurt herself with the knife? No, I was I was hurt by the first twig. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. It was like a it was like a little smack. Like nothing. My fault. Sorry for anything. Yeah. This is not going to be a little smack.

So this tree is like, stop touching me like just it's it's just going to go way overkill and roll. Holy shit. It's going to miss. So I imagine all of these coming down and there's like a perfect Linda shaped like like her defense is working. Yeah. She's just swinging the dagger back and forth and like the bulk of it comes down around her like an old fucking silent movie. Martha is not going to do anything. Now she's not going to do anything yet. Awakened tree. Oh, God. He's going to move right here. Floss is not in a good spot. Floss is fine. If they all have advantage already, you can just use reckless attack and not care about it.

They will. No, they don't all have just the two of them. So we're going to target floss. We're going to get a plus two and we're going to slam with this big Awakened tree and 19 will hit. Oh, OK. 13 partially resistant. Thank God for rage. Cave, you are up. Yes. And now we're going to move the hex over to this this fella, this big gentleman in front of us. So let me do that real quick because I didn't officially do that last time. So there's the effect. And now we're going to we're going to just keep trying to bore a hole through it with with eye lasers. So you're going to. 22 will hit. 22 will hit. 11 damage.

And we're going to do it again. 23 will hit. And we're going to burn a hole through this thing. 12 damage. There's no crits yet. I'm I'm I'm waded with bated breath like. Well, we'll get there. If it makes you feel any better, this tree is in the yellow now. A little bit better. It's like yellow, orange. Like it's it's hurt. Geez. Awakened tree number two absolutely does have advantage here against floss. Oh, 19. 25 will hit. 15 partially resisted. Oh, man. OK, so this assassin assassin by. At the start, it's going to do nothing, but at the start of Floss's turn, you're going to take 66 damage until you break out of that because of like corrosive poison stuff.

Oh, well, that's great news because Therian war forged are completely unable to be poisoned. So boom. Well, then, yeah, I guess you're the best one to be tangled up in these vines. That's awesome. Chapman Chapman starting to lose his cool, his trademark cool. He's going to turn back like he's going to take it. This all of this in and look back at Martha and yell at her. All right. If you help us right here, get through this. I'll get I'll give you four limbs and enough blood for your ritual and then some in a few. I can guarantee you a lot, a lot more limbs in your future and a lot more blood if you help us.

We can have something going. But do you have anything? Medicine kit? You have a salve with poultice, some bandages I could use anything. And then as he yells that he's going to try to run around that big awakened tree. I don't know. Is there a wall? Could I get I guess there's a wall. Huh? I get behind here. I just want my advantage. If you say I can, I will. And then he's going to attack this guy with advantage with a short sword, which is, you know, it's probably his bone. So you know what? Any saw is welcome right now. Here we go. Oh, 19. That's a 25. That'll hit.

And then they'll have to sneak effect damage. Oh, low damage. 11 partially resisted. All right. You know what? I can use a bonus action to attack again. Do you want to? Yeah. OK. I just won't have the fancy stuff for that. Oh, first crit, ladies and gentlemen, we're going to roll on that table. That's 20. You deal a terrible blow to the target. They instantly drop your hit points and must roll there. That tree is dead. Oh, all right. That was my my pristine scalpel. I just like the one like thread that held the whole thing together and it just unravels and just like, damn, cool.

One less big ass tree to deal with. I knew that. Well, I was waiting for Martha to the Chapman goes, I'll get you whatever you want. I'll chop the tree down with a knife. Stop it. Him floss. Do some of that. Yeah, totally. So floss is going to turn his attention to Awakened Tree number two. And he's going to. Am I am I targeting two things? Yes. Well, I don't mean to. OK. I don't know how not to just click the thing. There you go. There we go. Awakened Tree number two. And he's he's just going to again, he's just at this point, just incredibly annoyed at the situation.

And he is going to strike with his pickaxe. Do here we go. Come on. Oh, that was almost a one twenty one, though, will hit 16 damage. And he will batter it one more time. OK. Nineteen lead. Fourteen damage. And he is because he's in frenzy, he's going to be able to hit one more time. And he's going to he's just he's just chop, chop, chop, chop, chop, chop, just absolutely. Oh, seventeen will hit. Good God. Fifteen. Damn. That is impressive. Incredibly annoyed. And and he's going to give it a look like that's enough. You mean it's incredibly sincere. And then that'll end his turn.

Perfect. Vine Blight is just going to shift over here and completely encircle floss, which will give advantage and we'll just we'll just whip again here. Twenty will hit. Eight partially resisted. Linda, you are up. So floss is surrounded on all sides by shrubbery and trees and branches and just annoyed. Not just. Yeah. He's in a huff. Hey. So floss is big hurt. So we'll just we'll do healing word first. So I'm going to do healing word on floss, but I'm going to do it at level three, which I think adds to D4 to it. It does. I got it. So I'll roll that first. Good.

So proud of you. I'm learning. So you add four to that healing. Perfect. I'm going to say to floss. Try and get out from in the middle. Floss will immediately give a very, very like a glare at Linda. Like, oh, really? Oh, yeah. But she said it really charismatic. Oh, no, he'll take whatever he gets. But really, do you think that's the most hurt I've heard? Yeah. Raging floss is rude. Raging floss is just impolite. He's definitely suffering. Eleven hit points, though. You're going to need those. I mean, I'll take them. Thanks, Linda. No problem. And then I'll also because in Linda's eyes.

Oh, I didn't mean to do that in Linda's eyes. Her little dagger trick seemed to do pretty well. I mean, there's no tree there. And the tree's gone. So she's going to move over to waken tree to know and she's going to try and do the same thing to him. It them. I have that tree identify. Do the boss lady stride up to it like, excuse me, staring up at it. Dagger. Oh, shit. Well, somehow you missed that tree. It was a little too like it was it wasn't attacking its focus. It's like branched over on floss. So I wasn't like quite able to reach. You were too confident is the thing.

It was floss. Using that dagger like a laser pointer. Come on, come on. All right. Floss is still focused on that. Awaken tree. Basically, he is in. That's enough. That's enough. That's enough. And he's just going to start attacking on a take. Awaken tree number two, as he was before there. Seventeen. Oh, shit. I meant a reckless attack, but that's fine. Do you want to reckless attack? No, that's fine. OK. Good for now. OK. Ten damage and and again. Oh, you might chop this baby down. Twenty six will hit. That will kill the tree. And with and he's going to whip around back to the assassin vine who has grappled him.

Oh, my. Go and his for his last attack. One more slam. Twenty seven. We keep rolling 19s. Fourteen damage. That's it. That's all he's going to do. All right. Cave, you're up. OK. So again, he just whips his head around and the laser just redirects like like a garden hose when you're switching from plant to plant. He's just going to aim at the other big tree and he's going to be just swearing very loudly about how much he hates trees. And we are going to switch the hex on this fellow first. So here we go. He's now hexed and now one to twenty four, I'll hit damage one.

Oof, oof, ten damage to 17, a lit and damage to. Much better. 13. We're just if looks could kill. We're doing sorry. All right. My turn's over. Oh, God. Awakened Tree number three is just going to step in here. Let's slam Linda. Eighteen to Linda. Let's see. Twelve damage. Martha is seeing what's happening. Ah, you bumbling clodges just making it worse. You realize that you're just going to piss off the forest. And she's targeting all of this at at Chapman. Like he was the last one to think if you just would have listened to me in the first place, instead of bumping into me like some clumsy oaf.

And she's going to cast Vicious Mockery at Chapman. And I'm going to need you to make a wisdom saving throw, please. We're looking for twelve or higher saves. Here we go. Wisdom. Oh, twelve. Twelve. Wow. OK. You're fine. You're you're you're totally fine. Oh, my God. Assassin vine. Hum. It's just going to let go of this grapple at this point. This poison seems to be doing nothing. And it is going to move up to here. You have an opportunity attack if you'd like to take one. I would like to take it. Take that. I will. Eighteen will hit. Ten damage. It is going to move up here and target cave and try constrict and meh.

Hit shit. OK, so it is going to do 11 damage to cave and grapple him. Doc Chapman. Unfazed by Martha's vicious mockery, he'll just tell her the offer still the offer still stands. And he will just go can't flank the assassin vine, but he'll go next to the vine and get the plus two with cave and attack it. Here we go. Oh, I didn't target it. Dang it. That's that's fine. You hit 26. 26 will do it. Sneaky sneak. Oh, 21 damage to the vine. Oh, my goodness. That's a lot of damage. Let's do bonus. Let's do a bonus dagger. Yeah, let's do it. OK, it's free. It's free. It's free damage.

Real estate. Oh, another crit. Another roll on the table. Turn the tide in addition to standard critical hit damage to your target, you gain combat advantage against all enemies on the battlefield until the end of your next turn. Holy mackerel. Yes. OK. I mean, sneak to. OK, so it'll do the damage automatically. Thing is, I don't add my modifier, so I'm just going to have to control click at the four. I think now because all my attacks of my my modifier to it like my next modifier. But since it's a half hand, I don't add my next. I'll just subtracted. OK, cool.

Easier that way. Got it. OK. All right. Anything else? No, I'm good this turn. Boom. Back up to the top. Linda is in the lead again. Let's go. I can't. We're rerolling initiative every time, right? Yeah, I'm always at the bottom. OK. Well, when does not feeling too high? However, as the boss, she feels like she needs to make sure that everyone else is OK. So that's a good manager trait. It really is underrated because if if your subordinates are happy, they'll do their job better. If you want to tell that to America, do you like just as a whole? OK, so we're going to do a first level healing word on cave.

And Linda is going to say to cave. We're halfway there. We can keep going and make it through to the end. Six health back to cave. Perfect. And then because the assassin vine is like looks a little like it seems like it's moving a little slower, a little limp. She thinks maybe she does have a chance against this one. So she's going to go over to the vine and she'll probably do more of like an actual stabbing dagger motion instead of because this is a vine rather than like shrubbery. Right. Yeah. It's got like big, thick like. Yeah. Do it. Like real girthy vines.

Well, I don't know if I would say that. OK. Oh, my God, almost a crit, 24 will hit. Oh, and I have advantage, I think. Oh, yeah. Yeah, because you're on the yeah, because because just in case I get 20 is possible. Oh, shit. New York, same Valerie. Oh, my God. OK. Holy shit. You rolled a 20 on the table. This thing's going to drop to zero hit points. But that dagger is man. It's the baby. This that makes no sense. You got a barbarian literally hacking three fucking attacks at these things and you walk up and go poke and it just right in the heart. I man. Well, shit fight.

I've got assassin. You don't want to know what's cool. Cave was about to take 66 damage. That's not cool. That's not cool. Well, no. Now it's dead. You're not. That's the cool part. Yeah, because like I imagine as Linda strides up and just assassinates this thing, they're like the vines are starting to wrap around. He's going, oh, oh, oh. And he goes, oh, OK. Well, I had it, but thank you. It's like covering his face. Well, shit, fucking. Wow. OK, if you're up and you're unrestrained. OK, well, I really do just have one trick. So we're going to keep doing it. Yeah, we're just going to we're just going to we're just going to keep blasting.

OK, he's he's hexed, I believe. I don't see an icon on him, but he should be hexed. Attack. That's a 24. I'll hit and damage 11. Oh, that didn't do the hex. D6, though. Let me throw them. Wow. Whoa, shit. OK, second attack. I think you did it to yourself. Did I do it? I think you added the effect to your next attack. Oh, OK. Well, I missed, I think, right with a 12. Yeah. 12. Yes. OK. But there's floss next to him to it. So he's got plus two to his attack. Maybe. Wait, what? Oh, oh, did you not add that to your thing? I haven't been adding. Oh, OK. Yeah. Yeah. Plus two. That would hit.

Sorry. 14. OK. Hurray. I'm going to roll the damage manually then, because it's going to try to apply the hex. Got it. So this is a D10 plus four. Eight damage. Oh, 12 damage. Yeah. Sorry. I didn't do the math. I'm all over the place. That turn was the equivalent of two people in the hallway. It's like, oh, excuse me. Oh, oh, oh, sorry. OK. Anything else? I don't think so. No, we're done. We're done. We're just yelling and shooting lasers into the sky. That's fair. OK. Martha's getting pissed because you show up at her house. You're fucking with the ecosystem. Like, it's just it's a big mess.

And she's going to start yelling at Linda. What would she call Linda? She's going to start dressing Linda down about the way she dresses. You come into this part of the country dressed like that and you start stabbing and pruning the wildlife. And she's going to cast vicious mockery on on Linda. Could you give me a wisdom saving throw, please? Oh, I oh, I hope I save on it. Well, we're looking for a 12 or higher wisdom saving throw. Yeah, she's going to fuck. That's OK. OK. So here's what we're going to do. Yeah. So that hurt Linda's feelings a little bit because she really likes her clothes.

She's put together like I think that's part of her identity in a lot of ways. So that's going to do five, five big damage. But that's not the thing. You're going to have disadvantage on the next attack roll you make before the end of your next turn. OK. Oh, I'm very hurt. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Floss floss again, taking all of this in. He's he keeps just saying in muttering under his breath enough and enough. No, no, no, no, no. This will just will not do. And awaken three number awaken tree number two, number three. He's going to go straight for it. Oh, shit.

Twenty six. That'll hit if you need to be told that. Oh, minimum damage eight. Oh, well. And he's and once again, it's like he swings in one direction and he just swings back in another direction. Fifteen lead, twelve damage to the tree and again. Twenty six will hit. Holy shit. Max damage. Nineteen to the tree. He's incredibly frustrated at this. And it seems like he's very just over it as well. Vineblight's going to take a turn and it is going to move down here to just ban. Wow. Maybe not. Maybe not, though, because floss floss is really putting out a lot of damage, and I think this fine is going to get a little scared of that.

So it's going to try and constrict Linda instead, because Linda's right there. Linda's within reach. Linda also just killed a man. Well, you killed a plant murderer. Which is more shrub slaughter than manslaughter. But let's see what happens. I don't know what's going to happen. Seventeen will hit. You knew. Nine damage to Linda. Linda is restrained. Linda has how many hit points left? Four. Did the vine thing have to move closer to Linda? It has a ten foot reach. Yeah. So it went, kind of sent out these little tickly vines and Evil Dead style. Yeah. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.

Xavier, I haven't I haven't watched the whole movie. I know it's look scared when I saw the trees. It's been a long time. It's no longer the 70s. It's just going to grab Linda by the arms. And Linda is restrained. So that's a problem. Doc Chapman. Let's go help Linda. He's going to mean mug Martha the whole way and he's going to get it doesn't do much, but I'll try to get like in between Linda and the vine blight and attack it with advantage. Let's go. I missed the tray. I need to roll again. Hey, we're going to drop that to take a 16 22 will hit. That's a sneaky.

That's a sneaky. Holy shit. 24 damage. Everybody at home. That's a six, a five, a four and a six. I'm going to bonus action with the dagger because I have to at this point, it's going to be with advantage. 19 will hit. Well, it's a hit and I'll I'll just roll a d4. Hey, one and a Awakened tree. Man, I don't even know that. He keeps hitting floss and floss doesn't go down. The floss is taunting him. Yeah, I'm going to you know what? Fuck it. Floss again. Let's let's you know what? He's there. He's daring this tree and he has been the whole time. Oh, Jesus. 23 fucking 13 partially resistant cannot drop you.

Murky Martha. You know what? Done with this. Done with it. Murky Martha is going to get behind cave and just try to scratch his eyes out. Just go for the eyes. Really? She's an old woman. She's let's just claw it. 18 will hit 14. Oh, wait. Oh, I lost concentration on the hex. Oh, OK. So no more hex. Oh, yeah. Rolled one. Yeah. So 14 damage. Lost concentration. The vine blight is up real quick. I'm going to hellish rebuke on Murky Martha. You know what? That's fair. Yeah. So we're going to just do this real quick. So just for fun, I'll just be brief. You point your finger.

The creature you damaged momentarily surrounded by hellish flames creature must make a dexterity saving throw. It takes two to 10 fire damage on a failed save or half as much on a successful one. So I'm going to level with you. Martha's not dextrous. Let's let's see, though. Let's see if she's got like one crazy move in her. No, no. OK. That's 2D 10 fire damage. She's going to try and leap out of the way. But like just move like half an inch. So she like what does she get behind him and like reach around her face to like rake at his eyes? Yeah. Like she jumps on your back and tries to scratch out your eyes.

Yeah. So that fucking hurts. And that's what he yells. And his whole body is just wreathed in flame to like get off and get her off of him. And that's 14 damage. Yeah, it's 14 damage. Yeah, that'll. Yeah. Wow. OK, cool. Shit. He's gives that about enough at this point. Oh, man. OK. So Linda is still grabbed by this fine. So fucking this vine is just going to try to. It's just going to try and whip Chapman. Twineal hit. All right. Before you do the damage, I'm going to get the uncanny dodge effect. OK. OK. Uncanny Dodge. Oh, good thing, because that was almost max damage. 13.

So you're just going to you're going to get half that sweet. OK, Linda, it's your turn, but you have to take 66 damage. What the fuck? It's those poison vines there. They're like they got you. So. Bye, everybody. Well, hold on. Hold on. Good. So, OK. Physically, I will go down. You'll go down, but you won't. You shouldn't die outright. It's what we're still doing. It's only half. Yes. Half negative. It is possible if if. OK, so let's see. Hold on a second. It's still possible to die outright. Yes. So good. Let me see. What's 16? I'm bad at this. 15 plus two. It's negative 16.

So then with the 30, it would become I need 20 to die. Yeah, I would have been I think. Let me see. Hold on. Hold on. Because I. We round down because 15 times two is 30. So 16 times two is 32. Oh, so 17 times two is 34. Yeah. Yeah. OK. So we have to heat up. OK. She is 21. Yeah. This poison would have to do 21 damage to you to kill Linda outright. And it's 66. So plus six. What? Oh, is it not? I just made that. No, no, no. Don't don't. It's like six, six, six, six, six, six. And one to grow on. So. Oh, Jesus. This could kill you outright. Well, I'm not happy about that. I need someone to pay me.

Just kidding. I'm not paid. Oh, God. Are you ready? I assume that was rhetorical. No, I mean, I. Here we go. Ring does the ring come into play in any way? Not yet. Oh, man. Oh. This poison. Is going to seep into Linda's skin. And slowly but surely, as she's trying to struggle out of this, you're going to see her veins underneath get darker and green and travel up her face as they get to her eyes. And her eyes are just going to start to bulge out of her head until both of them pop and she is going to go limp. And that'll bring up floss. Mother fucker. I'm it's going to be just.

I mean, true rage. At the vine blight. My God, I don't even know. I can't. All right. I'm just going to start rolling student. Twenty five will hit. Nine damage. Again. Twenty two will hit. Twelve damage will kill it. It's in this rage, you would imagine that it would be. A lot of noise, like yelling, it's complete silence. Until it's just done, completely done. But he's got another attack and he's going to go straight over to awaken tree number three and his last attack is going to be there. Fourteen will hit minimum damage of eight and that will kill the tree.

The only one left is Martha. And with his last. He's going to move over straight to Martha. Oh, no. That's it. That'll industry Chapman. I guess Chapman was looking like he's he was in between the vines from the thing and Linda and he sort of I guess he was keeping an eye on Linda and making sure. And as he saw the poison get funneled into Linda, he his medical mind started like started trying to find solutions and there was nothing he could find in the moment. And then the ice popped, I guess, and he was like, well, like time of death. And then he'll. He'll leap over Linda's body.

He'll shove cave to the side and he'll just go like try to like just stab Martha. Just like emotionless, just stone face, just hop up and then. But no advantage. I guess I can't technically shove came out of the way, so I'll be just here. So it's just a trio of you in front of her at this point. Yeah. Yeah. Kill the boss, man. Nineteen will hit. That's a sneak. Holy hell, sixteen damage. Hey, the bonus dagger. Here we go. Save us bonus dagger. Fourteen. No. OK, that's going to miss. Cave. OK, so did she get the damage that I did to her before? She did. Yes, she did.

OK. Yeah. Yes. So he's going to spin around like with with Chapman in one shoulder and with floss at the other. And he's going to grab this woman by whatever nasty ass robe she's wearing or the fur cloak. I think she said she had. And we're going to eye to eye. I'm going to Eldridge blaster right in her friggin face. Oh, that's what we're doing. She should be like, she just got here. And here we go. Are we targeting her? Yes, we are. Yes. Technically, it's not Martha's fault. She's trying to stop. She's the only one left alive. Oh, my God. Twenty six will hit. Six damage to Martha.

And one more. God, 20 will hit. Twelve damage. Yeah, that's my turn. I'm going to keep going. Yeah, we're going to reroll initiative round six, everybody. Lucky round six. Cave, you're up. We're still blasting. This is like and you're completely overwhelming this woman, by the way. It's like she's just putting her hands up like you're. Yeah. Yeah. No, it's just we're not stopping. Got 13 damage. OK, it's my turn. Oh, God, floss. Floss is going to reach out and try to grab and grapple her. And restrain in some way. I mean, she'll oppose that strength check, but I hope it's good.

Too much good. I mean, this is. Yeah, she'll try and cartwheel out of the way. What should I do here? Should it be a straight up strength or athletics or. I mean, give me an athletics and it'll be opposed by her. Yeah. Oh, you know what? That's a 20. Let me just there's nothing she could roll. So remember, similar to how he. What was his name? Well, one of the people who got hurt early in the blasts and in the mine. He sort of basically holds this person sort of gently. But there's no way they can be. They could get out of it. He's going to do the same thing. He's going to go.

It's basically like a cage, like a floss cage holding this person. And he's going to he's going to basically he's going to look down and he's going to say, fix it. Oh, God. Well, one, that's terrifying. Yes. Intended to. That's the end of your turn. Oh, God. See, I could just probably outright kill this person and I don't know that that's the right thing to do. He's going to ready an action. If she does anything to try to to to, you know, cast a spell or something like that, he's going to attack. But he'll stop. OK. OK. Martha's turn. She's going to wriggle like it's kind of like raspy, like you're you're squeezing her.

Her little hunchback is just being bent and contorted. I wasn't trying to hurt any of you. I'm just trying to protect more people than my ancestors hurt. And in the midst of all this. She's she's kind of kind of like register what you said. I mean, fix it. He's going to whatever he needs to do to adjust his body slightly, he's going to move himself so that she's facing Linda. I'm going to flat out tell you, you are out of combat. She's not trying to hurt you. She was desperate and just but she's not trying to hurt you. Fair enough. Now she needs to help us.

You can't just undo death. I, I didn't want any of you hurt, but I what do you want me to do? Undo it. I'm not a cleric, even if I wanted to die. I'm old. I don't. The only thing I could do is a mixture of juridic and blood magic. And that's not a it's not a guarantee. Do it. You can't just willy nilly do these things. Your friend could come back very wrong. I don't know who Willie is, but do it. She's going to look at to cave and Chapman at this point. It's like, like, just like she can't even move her arms like just like, like, what do you like? What do you want here?

Like, cave has basically removed himself from this like when when floss grabbed her, it was essentially like stopping him from from just boring all over. So he kind of did that thing where he like his back. He like took a couple steps back and it's like pacing. And he's like, oh, shit, shit. Like, he'll stop and look at Linda. He's he's completely in his head right now. So, like, he's not he's not going to be much help to Marco. So, I mean, probably like like run on his knees and like to Linda's body, kind of like check the balls, check everything, like like do the the whole the whole medical checkup.

And when she tries to get confirmation from from Cave or Chapman, Chapman sort of like just says, you might want to do what he's asking. So no one's going to see reason here. OK. Oh, God. You're not really giving me a choice here. You really want me to try this? Chapman has no knowledge of druidism or blood magic, so it's like magic stuff, I guess. Yeah. Yeah, floss won't move at all. If you put me down, I can start prepping a ritual then. But whatever happens, it is on you. You brought this. I'm fairly certain we didn't bring this and he's going to gesture around it all of the vegetation that has been completely destroyed and and or walking over her fence.

You're going to butt in at that point and he's going to turn in like his eyes because of he's been using this for his stupid power so much. His eyes are like bloodshot. He looks he probably is crying more from the exertion, but also the whole situation. He's like, no, no. You caused this. You caused this because you sat here on your ass in this fucking forest and you did nothing about this problem except just try to assuage it. This is exactly your fault. You goddamn uncreative stupid hedge bush bitch sitting out here in the woods just trying to pretend the problem isn't as bad as it is.

You could have fixed this years ago. And now she's dead and it's your problem. How could I have fixed it? Do you know anything about druidic magic? I know that just because the rules are set down by somebody doesn't mean you have to follow them. You sat on your ass for decades and let this happen. Oh, oh, I'm sorry. Should I go borrow some power like you? Floss is going to let her go and and let her fall to the ground. Ow! He glances at Floss going, OK. His point being get to work and he's going to gesture to Linda. Well, Jason's not happy about this. No, I mean, there's a real gun to her head.

There's not. OK, let's talk meta for a moment. Would you be OK with this, though? I don't like I feel bad if you didn't want this. That's true. Oh, are we talking to me now? Yeah, just just yeah, meta wise, like. I don't know. I have a lot of thoughts on what's happening right now, and I find it very interesting. I guess my biggest question is, what is this ritual and what does it do and what could be the complications of it? Well, I'm going to get I'm going to get into that in just a moment. But I don't I don't want to basically I don't want to meta this and have you know what I mean?

Like, yep, yep, yep. OK, let's take a step back for everybody out there at home for you guys. So something I've noticed is that there are healing classes that don't have a version of resurrection. And I didn't think it was fair that only clerics had a chance to use raised dead, things like that. However, classes like druids, classes like, you know, bards, stuff like that wouldn't have the same magic or the same chance to bring somebody back. So this is basically a different version of raised dead resurrection, whatever you want to call it. It is way more complicated and there's a lot of stuff that can just be weird or wrong.

So whatever happens, like Linda would still be Linda, but Linda is going to change in some way. It's not you know what I mean? It's it's it's there's tables to roll on. I'll put it that way. Are there would would Martha would Martha have any other thoughts about what could be done to fix this other than what she's intending to do? I mean, she's very dead. Like there's I like that. Yeah. Like it's not like, oh, she's poisoned. We need to heal that. It's like her eyes are gone. Like that. Like we're well past like let's put a bandage on this. This is this is the this is the chance.

Right. So she is going to start to prep a ritual. She's she's going to go to where her hut used to be and start rifling through things. And she's going to roll Linda onto her back and kind of like put like a rolled up like like a rolled up tunic or robe underneath her head, you know, for comfort. And then she's going to start burning this this this this sage like like dried up stuff and kind of like waving it over her body. And she's going to start putting various dried up bits of roots and stuff into, you know, into this little bowl and start grinding it up right while she's doing that.

I mean, you can finish this description, but Katie's going to be doing something in the meantime while she's doing that. OK. And I should also mention that for for for painting a picture, Floss is hovering throughout all of that right on top of her. Oh, God. OK. And while we're all saying what we're doing, I'd probably be going be going through the rubble and try to like salvage any like herbs and potions or like healer healing stuff like bandages or like. Yeah. You know, like any anything in her pharmacy that got blown out, like I just try to. Oh, just steal from her.

Yeah, steal from her. OK. Yes. OK, good. A slight of hand. This poor old woman. I like this is a big gray area, guys. I'm going to I'm going to level with you. This is I don't feel good about this. This is how you run a business. Capitalist picture. What's cave doing when when she starts setting this up, he's going to go to another. He's going to stay within the palisade wall, but he's going to get as far away from the rest of the group as he can. Wouldn't what he considers to be safe. And he's going to do whatever needs to what needs to be done. I want to I want to talk to the boss.

I want to set up a little ritual and talk to my boss. Oh. Well, I figure that's going to take about 10 minutes to set up. OK. Yeah. OK. Well, so you're setting that up about the same time that she's setting this up. And if floss is hovering over, I don't think she's going to stop. So this is probably going to be like a photo finish at the same time. Are you trying to beat her to the punch or no, not necessarily. I don't want I don't want to be done, I guess, after her. But I'm not I'm not trying to like stop the resurrection or whatever she's trying to do.

OK. That was my OK. So. Oh, boy. OK. I'm going to need everybody to roll some dice. This is all completely fucked up, by the way. This is so fucked like this. Like this is in the wrong kind of sort of a lot. I love it. I didn't anticipate this. Me neither. Oh, God. OK, so let's. All right. Well, I'm going to start chanting and things are going to happen. Essentially, I'm I'm beseeching nature to help and I make no guarantees that this could backfire wildly. I I've never attempted this. I just know of it. So let's temper expectations. Floss has a purple and an orange eyes just staring right at her.

There's nothing there's no there's no change in his face. He's just staring right in her eyes. OK, so she's going to start she's going to start chanting here. And just you're going to notice like it's nighttime and stuff, and you're going to notice that the the lights around the area are going to start kind of like flickering and changing and shit. And as you as you are are hovering over her. Well, OK. One of you is robbing her. One of you is talking to the boss and one of you is just hovering over this older woman. Right. And I'm oh, boy. Val. I'm going to need you for this next bit.

OK. I'm I'm going to need you to give me a couple of rolls here. OK. OK. OK. Now, first of all, I need Martha to roll. OK, that's a 12. OK, so a lot of damage is about to be done to Martha, like just a whole metric crap ton of damage. All right. Then I'm going to need you, you to roll. And well, we're going to see what happens, OK? Because technically you're missing a body part. Yeah. So we need to fill that with something. And nature is going to need to step in here a little bit. So, well, the eyeballs you need, I got plenty back home. Forty eight damage to Martha.

So as Martha's doing this ritual. These these vines are going to shoot up from the ground again and like wrap around her waist and like kind of spider climb down her limbs. And they're almost like pulling her into the ground like it's going to contort her. She's going to be in quite a lot of pain. Her eyes are just glowing bright. And can I get a D20 from you, please? OK. Am I looking for a high or a low number? It's it's it's just a number. OK. I've gone through a lot of wine. I got I got to mention. That's fair. OK. Well, that's OK. Those holes, your eye, your eye sockets are going to change a bit.

So a 17 is different. It's OK. So the lower the role, essentially, the more bizarre or freakish it was like spider eyes are on the list. Things like that, which, well, you're going to stand out in the crowd, but you get great perception. But 17. You're going to get dragon eyes. Oh, OK. So Linda's eyes are going to be very reptilian and gold and like the eyelids are like, yeah, they're kind of like there's almost like a carapace around the eye. So it is definitely not human. And holy shit, does it scream not human. Like if the eyes are the windows to the soul.

So that's first off. Next. I need a madness role. OK. So a D 20. Give me a moment. We're gonna we're just gonna bring this up. Should be fine. This should be a dragon eyes. Cool. That's an upgrade. I mean, yeah, it's kind of cyber punky, right? Like and we just got art done. I know. I know. That's like a cool to get art with dragon eyes. Like a ten dollar fix. Yeah. Can you get an alteration like, hey, here's ten bucks. Give me the layer on top. Weird fucking eyes. Oh, God. OK, hold on. OK. We're going to roll on the incurable madness chart. This is just a new facet of Linda.

So you're going to get these weirdo dragon eyes. These roots have entangled you and they've lifted you up. Really think like the craft, like the 90s version, like you're like it. Shut up. Don't worry about if I know what that is. Don't worry about. You're lucky you didn't get the Evil Dead reference earlier. You don't know what the 90s are. I'm so sorry. You said it without thinking. Like so you're going to be like propelled like like Linda is being sorry. Not Linda. Martha's being pulled apart while this is happening. These fights are just getting bigger and bigger.

And her arms are going to be torn from the sockets as she's elongated. And she just keeps being elevated and pulled away from Linda. Can I get a D 100 from you, Linda? I got a D 100. 31. I think that's a low. Are we were we going for a high number? Or was this like another like, you know, it doesn't matter. We were going for this one specifically, I think. Oh, my God. So some of these are things that happened to you. Others are trails of thought that are in your head. This is very much along these lines. This thought is running through Linda's head at all times now.

Oh, my God. There's a secret person controlling me. There are people controlling us all. Our lives are just a game. Can't you see that? Oh, my God. Linda's workplace environment is about to get real toxic. I think that's a good time for us to stop for the night. This was not the expectation. Nope. Nope, nope, nope. Oh, my God. Hey, good news, though. I didn't chop off arms and legs from all of you. Oh, good news. Great news. Great news, Xavier. Absolutely great. Good job, everybody. No one's dead. You know, it's fair enough. She's very dead. We'll be right back after these words from our sponsors.

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