Darmock is inside of me
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Unleash your senses. Shop now at nerdscandy.com. - Hey everybody. I apologize for this on social media, but I wanted to do so one more time here just in case you don't follow us on any social stuff. I released an episode out of order last week. So for those of you confused, you are not going crazy. That is totally my fault. I've put in a ton of fail safes to make sure that never happens again. And for those of you who are wondering, how could you do something like that? There's a very good reason. If you follow us on GMT, that's posted on Patreon, you know that Bre is basically working outside of the house.
DNR stuff falls on me, and I just got overwhelmed and messed up. It's my fault. It will not happen again. So please enjoy today's episode. If you'd like to swing by our Patreon and throw in a couple of shekels, we do have some open spots for Patreon games. I don't know how long they're gonna stay open, but I figured I'd just throw that in. So thank you all so much. I very much appreciate it. And I hope you enjoyed today's episode. - Hey everybody. Welcome to Dungeons and Randomness. This is Lisa from Group Forsaken. We are currently trying to fight our way out of hell.
If you'd like to help us in doing this, please head on over to our Patreon. That's patreon.com/dandr. I don't care, I'm going with it. If you want, you can come and hang out with us on our Discord. You can find the link on our website. That's dandrpodcast.com. Or again, by finding it through our Patreon. Hit us up on Facebook or Twitter or however you wanna get in touch with us. We'd love to hear from you. - Thanks. (soft music) (soft music) (soft music) (soft music) - Let's do that thing where we go around the table and introduce ourselves. I'm Jason, I'm the Dungeon Master.
Go around the table starting with Zach. - What's up? My name is Zach and I play Blevin Elmar Rutherford on "Groot Forsaken." - And Jamie. - Hello, I'm Jamie. I play Tatiana, the Human Rogue. - And Lisa. - Hey, I'm Lisa and I play Vella, the Minotaur Rogue. - And Karen. - Hi, I'm Karen and I play Joe, the Human Cleric. - And last and certainly not least, James. - Oh, hey, I'm Jameson and I play Larg, the Half-Orc Barbarian. - So let's deal with something before we get into anything else. As you know, this year has been trying, let's call it, for the podcast because since January 1st, everything has been on fire.
So what we've been trying to do is slowly get back to normal here and I feel like for the most part, we're doing great now. Episodes are coming out much more regularly. We're back to D&D, which I love. We gotta get people to realize we're back to D&D because we got a lot of people, it's like, you know, I'd listen to the show if you went back to D&D and it's like, funny you should say that 'cause like in March, you know, so-- - Just hold on a little bit longer. - Yeah, it's like, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, it's fine. But there was a whoopsie doodle because of some corrupted audio.
Your second episode never went out. We all just consciously, unconsciously thought it did and we just worked on that assumption, but it didn't. So everybody out there, essentially, the Forsaken crew were journeying through hell and kind of happened through this doorway that led to a beautiful snowy fantasy village where, you know, people were hanging out and eating and there's like a little festival and then they started getting picked apart. And then that's where you guys jumped back in. There was some role play stuff, but again, whoopsie. So if we can get that audio listenable, we might put it up on Patreon, but yeah, that should be the last time anything like that happens.
Anyway, where we left off last time is I told you guys you were gonna have to solve a puzzle. And I told you that there'd be this fantasy bow that's on the line, right? And if you DM games, it can be tough because you don't wanna be derivative. You don't wanna, you know, take stuff from pop culture and stuff too much, but puzzles are not my strong suit. So I got to thinking I can sit here and waste double the time it would normally take to come up with a puzzle, or we can take classic puzzles from both D&D history and movie history and we can solve some of them.
So this is the first one of those, and many of you will recognize this right away, but let's pick things up. If this is completely optional, you don't have to interact with this at all, but that has never stopped you before. So as you're walking, there's going to be this stony kind of inset where walking around hell, there's lots of little foot paths and things like that. There's your bubbling cauldrons of lava and your endless depths of the pits and stuff like that and you're kind of walking around, but every once in a while, there'll be like broken architecture where you're almost walking through long forgotten castles and stuff like that, and you're just kind of like moving from place to place.
It's almost like these things have just been kind of ramshackled, like slammed together, not that this was a cohesive place. And there's going to be this stony section of wall and it kind of like curls in at one point. And you're gonna see this (soft music) this gorgeous bow. And it's behind this kind of glass, that kind of like cracked glass fixture, but it's clearly enchanted so that you can't just like reach in and grab it, right? And you guys have been around long enough to know that nothing's free here. And sitting under this little display is this tiny fountain of blood.
And it's just a little fountain here. And next to it are two empty containers, a five gallon container and a three gallon container. (laughs) And if this sounds familiar to any of you, golly gee, I hope you watch "Die Hard 3" with a vengeance, the one with Samuel L. Jackson, 'cause what you're gonna have to do, and again, you can walk past this, but it informs you that there's like a little inscription. What you have to do, and no one can Google this, is you have to get four gallons of blood. Four gallons, even. And you're gonna have to set it on this pedestal when you think you have it.
But if it's off by even an ounce, bad things are gonna happen. So first off, I'd like to let the party just talk to each other, 'cause let's be meta for a second here. Is this something you wanna tackle or not? - So first of all, I just wanna say, it's been like five years since I've DMed ever. The last time I DMed, I did this puzzle. (laughs) - Yes! (laughs) - All right, then I say we do it. - I will say this up front, because I know the answer to the puzzle, Lark's too stupid, I'm gonna set it out, but I will put you in if necessary. No, I wanna participate, but I know the answer, so I'm not gonna do it.
- And it's funner if we try to figure it out. - Yeah, and Lark's too dumb. - Does anybody else know what Lark's doing? - He's gonna be off on the side playing with rocks, so that's fine. - Well, Blevins intelligence is eight, so I guess we're just looking at each other. (laughs) - I don't know the answer, so I'll participate. - I don't know the answer either. - So the thing is, it is a timed puzzle, so when you start, there's a time limit, and it's gonna be a real one, like I'm gonna be holding it up. So here's the thing, again, totally optional. Yeah, there's a cool piece of loot, but you don't have to interact with this at all.
The only things you're allowed to use are the two containers. Again, there is an endless stream of blood, so you don't have to worry about running out of liquid. - Okay, for some reason in my mind, I was like, okay, we have to like, I was like, there's not that much blood. - Yeah, no, no, no, you have plenty of blood, yeah. - I'm game to give it a shot, I mean, the worst that can happen. - I wanna do it too, because it sounds like also Jamie is like, oh, but like I like games and things, and I don't have any idea how to solve the puzzle, but I'm wondering what's the consequence though, Jason?
- Oh, well, that wouldn't be any fun if I told you the consequence before you started. - So, okay, may I ask that we then, like what's the scene, are these instructions on what we need to do and why written somewhere? How do we know we need these four? - Four gallons, if you're in the UK, use liters in your head, that's fine. And then like, yeah, whatever, it's basically the same. So again, there's a little inscription here that tells you what you need to do. And again, the only rules are, you can only use these two containers. And other than that, you guys can chat amongst yourselves.
And here's the thing with puzzles in D&D, the entire time you're playing D&D, you're trying to separate yourself from the character you're playing, but you can't really do that in a puzzle like this because of babies and they'll scream and you're fine. So you can't help it, there's too much of a blend. So I don't mind you guys metagaming here, go for it, talk amongst yourselves, solve the puzzle. And I think if it gets to the point where you guys have like two minutes left and you still can't solve this, I think it's okay if Jameson gives you a hint.
I mean, I'm fine with that, whatever. - Like in an escape room when they're like, "Okay, you get three clues guys." - I'm trying to think of some sort of like teeter totter or like lever scenario where we can- - I just want a mental image of Larks standing on the side with a scholarly cap, just being like, I know. - Nope, they need to figure it out for themselves, bootstraps. - Bootstraps. - No one told me when I went to hell the first time. - Nobody helps me, so nobody should get help. I have any ways. Yeah, so I'm fine with that. I will absolutely help if you guys wanna use a lifeline, but otherwise I'm not gonna get hurt.
- Okay, but again, just to be clear, it doesn't say why we need to do this or what the consequence will be. It's complete mystery to us. - Yes. - Got it, okay. - Like a lot of things here, you feel like this is just set up to fuck with you. - Right, it's torture. - It's kind of, it's like, yay, here's a glimmer of hope. Fuck you, like it's kind of, you know. Darmok, by the way, the entire time is just, he's just kind of eyeballing you waiting to see if, 'cause he knows you're a person who uses a weapon like this. So he's just kind of like watching you, seeing if you're gonna go for it or not.
- I'm watching him watch me. - Oh my goodness. - Oh, he'll watch you watch him watch you. - Does he look excited that I'm like thinking about it? - He- - Does he want us to do it, 'cause then maybe Tati's out. - I think, yeah, like he's definitely like, he's like, go on, touch it. Like just kind of, you know what I mean? - Ew. (all laughing) - He grows. - That's what I thought you meant, like, is he excited? I was like, oh, probably. - Okay, well- - I didn't know it was gonna be that kind of a session. Jesus. - There's a lot of blood around here and he's looking at Tatiana like, yes.
- Well, if we're being met at Jamie's game, let's do it. - Let's give it a whirl. - Yay. - All right, so you guys are gonna get 10 minutes to figure this out. The only rules here, metal-wise, are you gotta keep talking. Like everybody just come up. So there is a correct way to do it. Obviously, Jameson did this puzzle a little while back. And if you've seen the movie, you kind of get a vague sense of what you're supposed to do. But yeah. I'm gonna start the timer now. 10 minutes on the clock, everybody. - Oh my goodness. - Okay, so we need four gallons. Does anyone have a measuring cup?
(laughs) No, really. - I'm sure. - I'm looking. - The buckets themselves are conveniently measured. 'Cause you know, it's hell. They're not savages. - I mean, here's the thing. You know that they're not lying to you. You know that one's a five gallon container, one's a three gallon container. You know that. So filled to the brim, each one is that exact measurement. You don't have to worry about anybody fucking with you there. - Okay. - How much water would a water skin hold? Just curious. - Ah, but here's the thing. You can only use the containers. - But I was thinking like, if we use that to measure out one gallon and then- - I don't think you hear me.
You can only- - Really? - Only use the containers. There is a way to do it with the containers. - What's stopping us from... So it's a three gallon container and a five gallon container. Why don't we gently pour... We need four, right? - Yes. - We just gently pour the five gallon container into the three one until we know that one gallon has been filled and we put them both on the teeter totter thing, right? - I don't, that's what I'm saying. - You can put the five in the three without letting it overfill. Then you've got two left in the five, split that in half.
So pour out half of that, put the three back in the five, then you've got four. - Shut the fuck up. That's amazing. (all laughing) - I don't know if that'll work. - How do you know that will work? - But I was like trying to- - You have to measure exactly half of that remaining amount though. That's perfect. - Right, you have to measure exactly half of the remainder in the five. - Wait, is there some sort of scales or balance system? - Yes, there is. - Okay, 'cause that's what I was trying to figure out. I was like, how do we rig up like a board and a rock?
- So basically you set it up on this pedestal when you think you have it. And again, it has to be within an ounce. And if you're correct, then nothing bad happens. - Okay. - I think we could get to half within an ounce, right? - Okay. I think so. - I don't know. - I was gonna say something super meta. - The look on Jameson's face is telling me this isn't the answer, we should move on. Let's not waste any more time. Different ideas. - I'm gonna allow that by the way. Keep making faces Jameson, it's fine. - Different ideas, let's move on. Something else. - Hey, you know what's crazy?
Three minutes have gone by. - Oh shit. (all laughing) - Okay, so if that's not it, then maybe, if we fill up both and we have eight, no, that's not gonna be helpful. If we fill up, if we pour the three and the five, then we can, no, that doesn't do anything. Wait, okay, if we pour in the three and the five, then we've got three and then you can pour three and the three again, and that way it's equal. Okay, this seems right based on faces. - So now we have an equal amount 'cause we have three in the five bucket and we have three in the three bucket. So that's definitive that that is those amounts.
So now. - Profit. - Step three, profit. - I don't know. I really liked your first idea where it's like, you take the five gallon, you pour it into the three. There has to be only two remaining. You pour out the three, but then they're not, nevermind, 'cause the buckets are not the same width, nevermind. I figured it out, I logic myself out of that. - This is physically killing me, I'm sorry. I'm not like, 'cause I'm not. - This is even better. - I'm really bad with puzzles, so I'm actually, like I'm not trying to be smug that I know this one. I'm just very proud.
Also "Die Hard 3" is a really good movie, so I just watched a lot. - It's so good. - Wish I could remember. - Oh man, it's so good. It's worth rewatching after this, by the way. If it's please-- - It was the last good "Die Hard" movie. - It was like, yeah, hands down the best one. The first one's good, this one's good. But anyway, I'm gonna-- - Yeah. - I don't even remember a bucket scene or a scene like this. - Yeah, so in the movie there was a bomb in a neighborhood with like in a public park with kids and shit playing, so they had to, yeah. - Oh, wait. Oh, I think I remember that scene.
Anything blows up in there? - What'd they do? (laughs) - Oh shit, when did we get our clue? When did we get our clue? - Well, you got five minutes left, so you got three more to work this out. - And should I give you, so the first step you said, Jamie, is correct. Do you want me to give you the next step? - Yes. - Okay. - Is that allowed? - So you've got three gallons in the five gallon jug and three gallons in the three gallon jug. - And the three. - If you fill the five gallon jug, you now have five gallons in the five gallon jug and one gallon in the three gallon jug.
- Yes. - Oh, we were thinking about it backwards. - Then you can dump what's in the, no. Then you can dump what's in the five, four in the one, get the three, put the three in the five. - Nice. - Nice, nice, nice. - Okay, that was more giving them the answer, but like, yes, no, that was- - No, I just gave them the next step. That was all. I just gave them the next step. - Come on, give me a little credit, man. - Just one step. - I'm gonna also, it was supposed to be the two minute mark. You guys are terrible at following those, but you know what? - I'm gonna be useless for the next one without even pretending.
- That's fine. (laughing) - They're all based off Die Hard. That's the crazy thing. So- - Oh, we're good then, we're fine. - Everyone take off your shoes. That is our next puzzle. - You make fists with your toes. (laughing) - Okay. - Son of a bitch. (laughing) Here's the thing. We don't usually do puzzles on this show. So the first one, kind of loosey goosey. Also, we walked into this one with me just having to pick the puzzle. Problem is I hang out with all of you too much, especially like Jameson, Susan, stuff like that. So of course, paths were gonna get crossed on this one.
So we're gonna give you this bow. But statistically speaking, the next one will not be that easy because he can't know them all. So- (laughing) - He's gotta watch more obscure movies, like mix up with like dramas, like K-pop or something. Something you'd never expect. - There you go. - Oh man. This next puzzle is based on Stomp the Yard. - That's even better. (laughing) I don't know. Jameson on a bad Saturday might watch that. - My other favorite movie. - Damn it. I forgot, he's always stomping the yard. - That's the best of the Stomp movies is Stomp the Yard.
(laughing) - Does everyone remember the weird mid 2000s, like saves the last dance, Stomp the Yard, like hustle and slow. Like a lot of them. - Tough musical trope. Yeah. It was a thing. - Remix. - Came after the acapella ones. - Anywho, let's get you a fancy bow. (soft music) - Does anyone else use bows? - Bella does, but I think she's way more proficient with her rapier and you were way more, you were way better with the short bow in that battle. So she'd be like, eh. - Are you sure? - Yeah. - Do you use a short bow or a long bow? - I shrink the short bow. - Okay, I got you.
- Yay. - Yay. - I haven't had a fancy bow since Cory. - She had that cool water bow. I'd never remembered the name of it. - Oh, I wanna say it was like Aljuna. - It was pretty. - Something like that. - Here, you should see. Oh, it'd help if I dropped it in inventory. That'd be good. That'd be good. So you're gonna notice a running theme here because there's a set of weaponry and even cooler, there's a set of armor down here somewhere for each one of you. Like tailor-made, like somewhere in here. So after you, so that is the hellfire short bow. And that it's pretty nifty.
We're gonna have to get you guys into some combat to really test up these things here. So Darmach's gonna look pretty disappointed. Like, "I know." - It's bullshit. - They've seen Die Hard. Like just kind of like walk away. - A bucket of blood. - Sheffles away and gives Larg a dirty look. - Yeah. - That's about it. - In my mind, Larg was just sitting over there and he's just like, all of a sudden he's like, "You fucking idiots, come here." He just like grabbed the bucket and poured it. He's like, "Here, fuck off." - He's just like lying on the ground and had like a sparking inspiration.
- It's the one thing he just did a lot of Sudoku when he was in the orphanage. - He's like, "I hit a whole lot of rocks, let's go." - I should have taken from Die Hard 5. No one's seen that. - I saw it exactly once in the theater and never thought about it afterwards. - Fucking garbage. That was before Bruce Willis just stopped being in Good Stuff. Like we weren't ready to hear that yet, but it's like, "Oh yeah, he stopped trying." Anyway. I'm gonna give you guys a choice of things today. Everyone give me a perception check because there are three paths you can go down.
- Well, that's better. Oh wait, nevermind. It's not, I was looking at somebody else's. I looked at Largestar and thought it was mine 'cause it rolled right after I clicked and I was like, "Oh, there we go." So apparently this is not gonna be Vella's night just putting that up there. - You can't base that off of two rolls. - Yep. - Not great. - Watch me. - So as you guys are leaving this little area, you got your fancy bone. Again, it's a lot of like shattered old architecture and construction, and you're kind of like stepping out of like a hole in the wall where like a castle is.
And you're standing on this hilltop and you're able to see quite a distance. In front of you are three distinct paths. Now, I wouldn't say any of them look inviting, but here's what you see in order of right to left. On the right side, you're gonna see an area that skirts this huge lava pond, basically. And you're gonna see these leathery bat-winged flier things kind of hovering around, think gremlins too, like the gargoyle gremlin. And it's gonna land near the lava and something is going to reach out and grab it. Kind of the best way I could describe it is tentacle claw.
And it's going to snap this thing up and just drag it under as it's screaming. And there's gonna be a lot of like movement and then nothing. In the center, you have a path that sort of balloons outward and it almost looks like an arena of sorts. And then it narrows and continues through a gateway and you can't really see what's on the other side of it. But there's a faint glow coming from the other side. And then on the left-hand side, you are going to be going up a set of mountains, essentially. It is a steep climb, but at the top of it, you're gonna notice, it looks like someone's standing there with a bag of feathers in front of a big fan.
So like looking up at this mountain, it's gonna be like raining, like it's gonna be raining feathers. It's a weird looking thing. And you're gonna see something hanging over the side that looks like this shiny red scale mail. - That's on the feather side? - And before you, it's on the feather side. So let's label these paths one, two, and three. One being a lava pond, two being the big arena, and three being Mount feather. Before you make your decision, so as you go, I imagine you're standing there, you're looking out over this and you're kind of choosing which way to go.
Darmok has been no help. And considering his fate is tied to yours, you would think that he's pretty anxious to kind of get out of here. But you also know that the longer he's down here, the longer he gets to recharge. So he might be on the other side of the mountain, so he might be up for taking the scenic route just based on your last conversation. So he's watching, he's kind of watching all of you kind of silently mulling this over just okay, all right. And then suddenly, can I get everyone to give me a constitution saving throw, please? - Hey, there we go.
- Oh, wow, okay. - Oh, oh, oh, there we go. There they are. Well, look. - Oh, it's fine. It's just, you know. - Two of you are supposed to be squat and sturdy. Like that's that those are the two that made it out of this, that's fine. But Josephine Levens and I must just say Jamie, because that was, but Tatiana are all going to keel over here as the ground just like shakes beneath them. In fact, everything around you is going to be violently jostled. Like you're gonna notice, like again, that stone architecture is gonna start tumbling over behind you. There's gonna be just like, you're gonna witness like small avalanches, and clifftops just breaking apart and from that center path, you're gonna see a column of light shine down.
And hell kinda has a ceiling, like you can sort of see all the way up. And from that column of light, a tower is going to start to erupt from the ground and just continue up into the sky. And it's not going to stop until it slams through that rocky rooftop. And Darmok's gonna react very negatively to this. Like he's gonna stiffen up, he's gonna start to back away. And that's the first thing you've seen him react that way to so far. - Seems like a really good way to get out of here. - That's what I've seen him take you back. - Two of you guys, you're all about the gods, kinda.
Can I get a religion check from specifically Karen and Jameson? Anybody else who thinks that it relates to them, go for it. (clock ticking) - Rolling hot, 17. - So both of you are gonna get this feeling wash over you. And it's definitely the first time it's happened down here. For Josephine, this may be the first time in a long time that she's felt that, but for Jameson, the last time he probably had this feeling is back in Donhurst before all the unpleasantness. So it's kind of this feeling of like hope that there's something bigger than you and it's tagging in to help out.
This is divine intervention. That's what this feels like. Like you may not be able to prove it, but just it's gonna kind of like almost radiate out from this tower and wash over you. (chuckles) - So Larg and Josephine haven't really had too much of a chance to talk throughout this thing. So we don't really know what each other's deal is fully, but I think it's pretty clear at least to Larg that she is a cleric. It probably doesn't look like he's much of a ballad anymore, but he would absolutely, like he would feel that, see what's happening, feel what he feels, and then basically turn and look at her and say, and just sort of, I don't even know if he would say anything, just sort of like, just kind of share a look as though to say like, you feel it too, don't you?
- Yeah, and I think like when she feels it, she's gonna kind of be like that thing where when people like put their faces up towards the sun and they're like, oh yes, basking in the warmth or whatever, she's like, that is a feeling that I haven't, like you said, like it hadn't felt in a while and it's like, we should definitely go that way. Like that's, she almost maybe takes a step towards it and then like realizes where she is and kind of look back at you and like confirm like, yes, this is something like maybe we should go towards. - Now for everyone else, how would you react to seeing this?
And I'm guessing you're not getting that same like, that deep connection that like, oh, this is a sign, boom. But what would be going through your head? - May I have a question? The only way Tatiana would feel that is if it were specifically Vecna, but I know that that is, he's not, you know? - It is, hmm. Okay, let's put it like this. It's a different dish, but a lot of the same seasonings were used. - Okay, so she might feel a little, but it's probably not like to the level that you are feeling it, you know? She maybe is like, oh, that's weird. I've never felt that before.
- Right, but like, you're also, it's like, oh, someone's using cumin. Like you still get, you know what I mean? - That's not the regular hell that I've been tasting. (laughing) - It's reminiscent. - Yeah. - I imagine hell tastes like the first three seconds of an atomic warhead all the time. - Nice. - I just got a taste of my mouth. Oh my God, stop. - Yeah, there you go. It's called the 90s, Karen. - You said it, and I confused it. - Okay, so one of my coworkers got those headbands. They're like the, they kind of look like the chokers, like the squiggly line or whatever.
And she like put it on, and she's like, how do you wear this? And like with the bangs, and I was like, well, in the early 2000s, we used to gel our hair, and that kept the fly away. - Jinko jeans are coming back. - Just throw it away, 'cause it's gonna hurt your head. - Jinko jeans, do we have that much denim? I thought we were in a denim shortage. - Apparently, well, we know why now. - Oh. - Yeah. - Like the company Jinko's back? - That style of pants is coming back. I don't know if it's specifically Jinko. Apparently, they're coming back. I was informed. I was like, good, this is why I don't change my style.
So every 20 years, I'm fashionable again. Not that I wear Jinko, but like loose pants. - Man, do you think we can get them as a sponsor? That'd be great. Like. - That'd be great. That would be fantastic. I liked back in the day when you couldn't see people's feet. That was fun, right? Just what kind of shoes did they have on? I don't know. I can't see. - Everyone dressed like a little homies figure, like everyone, like every single person did. (laughing) - That was a buried memory. - From just a generation of, thank you. Just a generation of cartoonists. It's like, ah, I can't draw shoes.
Like just sad clothes poking out from under pants. - I don't know why, but I hated those little things. I hated them. I'd see them in every like little convenience store. I'm like, I'm not paying 25 cents for this. Not even like a dime if it was worth it. It's just so ridiculous. What do you even do with them? Like you sit them down in your house and just stare back at it like, what? It's like, ah, it's so terrible. - I bet a complete set is worth a jillion dollars today. But like that was- - It's a hard box. You're supposed to put a piece of your soul in it.
And then- - There you go. Yeah. - Yeah. - The one with the beanies specifically, the one with the beanie down. - It's like our version of those little Russian dolls that like go inside each other. That's like our version, but like really Americanized. So that was just the late nineties version of Ultimate Muscle figures, which were these little pink eraser looking guys that were like wrestling-esque. It's weird. They made a couple of Wii games and then like a cartoon on it. One of the characters names was Dick Dick Von Dick. So just- - Laying it on thick.
- Yeah. - Just on thick and you raise it on thick. - So much nuance there. (all laughing) - That's good actually. - All right. So I think we've sufficiently derailed it. (all laughing) - There was a writer who wrote that name down and everybody was like, "Are you good, man?" Like, "Are you?" (all laughing) Is that okay? - They said, "Have it done by Thursday. It's done, right?" Like they don't just fucking- - Where's my check? (all laughing) - It's an inside joke for the true fans. - All right, I'm done. - So I can't wait to see the chat and like these three people who are really into Ultimate Muscle's like, "Oh shit." Like, I love that moment.
- Oh man. So anyway, yeah, I think after Larg and Josephine share that moment, I think that they'll sort of just turn to the rest of the group and just be like, if I feel like we should go this way, this feels like the correct, this feels like the right way to go. - Yeah, you know, Blevins, 'cause you said we kind of killed over, Blevins could tell you weren't reacting 'cause he was screaming Larg when he was on the ground, like he was on life alert. "Hey, Larg, Larg, please!" Everyone on the ground was, "Everything's shaking. Hello, Larg." And you say, "I mean, we all finally stand up." - Yeah.
Well, sorry. Like too late get to come help you and like brush off your shoulder. Yeah, well, hey, you wanna go that way? - It seems like you had an epiphany there. Is everything all right? Both of you. - Well, yeah, I mean, that was pretty much just an act of the gods that we just saw. - What? The gods here? We're in hell, dear boy. - Yeah, that's the staircase, stairway to heaven. Sorry. - Nice. - I, sorry. - I'm gonna cut to the sign. You're not allowed. No, no, no. - We'll obviously look up together. - Copyright strike in a second. You don't even get to play three bars of that.
Like that's- - That's expensive, yeah. (laughing) - This is just a reference night. Fuck me, okay. - And this is, yeah, we are on a roll. Yeah, he'll just look at me like, that's help is what that is. - Quick question, does it look like there's any sort of entrance near us or is it like a big cylinder type massive tower with like just a block? - This is like a perfect cylindrical tower that is going to stretch into the sky. Now, from outside, it's gonna have a very interesting look because instead of it being one uniform piece of architecture, what it looks like is slabs.
Every floor seems to have this different theme and it seems to stretch just into the heavens forever. So this, like one will be, it's like marble columns and beautiful and all that. And one will be just like rusted metal and like very, very Silent Hill-esque. And then the next one's very like floral and green and like covered, like it's on and on and on like that into the sky. - Not to make another 90s reference, but I'm getting a very Mortal Kombat tower vibe. - Ah, yes, there you go. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. And then fucking Shao Kahn stand at the top and you don't want any of that.
- Then you gotta do the mirror match at one point and that's it. - Yep. - That's, yeah. Everyone remember Mataro? Fuck that guy. Like that just- - That was the one with the tiger stripes, right? - Yeah, like- - Yeah, screw that guy. - No, that was Kintaro? - Kintaro, yep. - Mataro was the centaur. - Oh yeah, he was even worse. Yeah, screw him. - Yeah, sorry. Anyway, okay. - Yeah, so just to kind of drive the point home, Kintaro's gonna look at Feather Mountain and he's gonna look at Tati and be like, I don't do mountains anymore, I'm sorry. I never mentioned that.
(laughing) - I just imagine the guy with the feather pillow just at the top like, it's the weather's nice up here. - Yeah, he's like, oh man, the tower's gonna be up. I thought I had one. - This is the safest way. - Like he has a lot of competition all of a sudden. - It's so soft. - Like just triangle. - You won't believe these feathers. - It was a good sell up until the tower from heaven showed up, yeah. - That's why I was thinking, that's scale mill, I'm intrigued. I don't think I can wear it, but I'm like. - We can rule out the last. - Just one last desperate throw.
- I'm lonely. - Yeah, he's just using what he's got. - I can't set up smoke signals, that's never gonna get seen here, but like I got these pillows. - Like my pillow guy in hell. - Oh God. - Right next to the fan guy. - Oh no. - I have proof. - Like that's gonna be him, sorry, I'm sorry. - That's just. - We go that way just to shove him off the side and then go back. - Right now, he got no easy deal now. Hey, you wanna go in this tower with this guy? - What's his deal? How do you get all these feathers? (laughing) - Climb off the top of the tower, what the hell man.
(laughing) - Darmok is going to almost shove you in the direction of the mountain. We're going up the mountain. Just almost like insistent, like he's telling you, like assertive. - Does he? - I think. - Sorry, go ahead. - Oh, sorry. - No, no. - I was gonna say, 'cause usually like when Darmok is being weird or wonky or whatever, Joe's just like whatever, he's just like this crazy coup or whatever and when he pushes like Larg towards the mountain she's gonna be like, why would we go that way when this is a direct route up? Like it goes straight up, that has a winding path.
Who knows what's over there, this is going right up and it feels not like hell. I don't understand why you wanna go that way. (laughing) So almost as if just the rest of his time with you has been an act, like he is stone cold lucid, perfectly like perfectly fine. And he is very calmly, but like very, very pointed very pointedly going to tell you, I know the other way. I am not setting foot in that tower. - Right, so to be clear, if we take this tower, we can be assured to lose your assistance or even have you as an enemy. Is what you're saying. - You're going to need me.
I assure you there is nothing free in that tower. However, if you're absolutely dead set on going there, I'll need to inhabit one of your bodies. - Ew, in character, ew, not in. - Yeah, no. - In character, not in, no. (laughing) - He's going to, no one piped up and said, we're not gonna need you. So he's like, okay, I'm gonna need you. - Okay. - I'm gonna need you. - Okay, I'm gonna need you. So he's like, okay, we're bartering now. And he's going to move forward and kind of put a hand on Larg's shoulder as he like circles around the back of him. It does come with perks.
- So Larg's gonna do one of those things. He's gonna sort of like collect his lapel here and just kind of arms length him, like just return him to arms length. Be like. - Okay. - Need to know more about why you said the thing you said. Why did you say that? (laughing) - I don't think I'd make it very far in that tower. It wasn't, it doesn't belong here, but I can still go with you if you allow me to hitch a ride as it were. I can give you some amount of power if that's a tantalizing offer. - Larg's gonna look, turn and look at the group and just kind of shake his head and be like, if he doesn't wanna go, he doesn't have to go, but I don't think that he should.
- Inhabit any of us. - Yeah, and if I'm honest, you haven't really helped much yet. So I don't know what we're gonna need you for anyway. - The last one that was your idea was really bad actually, so. - Well, I had fun. I thought we were all going to enjoy ourselves a bit. I understand I haven't endeared myself to you all, but I do want to remember that you started this partnership out with violence. I'm still recovering. Acting almost like offended like you struck me, sir. (laughing) - It's like, yeah, I mean, I will keep doing violence if I feel like it, so.
- I mean, somebody clearly wants to help us, so maybe we don't need your help anymore. Once we go in that tower, that could be our way out without you. - Everyone roll an insight check for me, please. - Me. (laughing) - Yeah, this is all Vella. So, okay, you ever watch Goodfellas or Blow or any of those types of movies where you've got a character that's really powerful and has a bunch of buddies and they all earn a bunch of money and then by the end of it, they have no friends and they're all afraid of them stabbing each other in the back and stuff like that?
That's kind of the Darmok story right now where that dude had tons and tons of power and now he's right smack dab in the middle of a place where he betrayed everyone and he is not welcome here. So tagging along with you is probably his best shot to not only get the hell out of here, but have a little protection as well. And you can kind of see that written on his face, like he's looking around like, "I think that you need us more than we need you." - That's gonna get under his skin a bit. - Good. - He's... (laughing) And he's going to move toward Vella.
Vella, by the way, probably towers over him. Like he's, like, he's, he's going to move towards him. Like, he's a fairly tall dude. He's like, you know, six, three, six, four, somewhere in there, but like lanky kind of like, kind of hunches over a lot. - Yeah, they're probably about even then. - Not in stature, I'm guessing. Like you're probably... - Yeah, she's, no pun intended. - Not to pun, but you got a bit more beef. - Yeah. (laughing) - We both win or lose depending on how you look at it. - So she'd square up. - But he's, yeah. Have you ever escaped from a place like this before?
Because I have, and I know what it takes, and you don't have it. - So far, I haven't seen anything that you actually have, or have to contribute. - So you remember when I said you guys are on this, kind of a, you know, this plateau looking over, you know, all these. He's going to hold his hand out, and a bridge is going to start to form from discarded bits and pieces of the environment. And it's going to form this almost like a nice little wheelchair ramp all the way down into that valley and right to the front door of this tower. I may have been holding back a little.
You let me merge with you. And I promise that I will do everything in my power to make sure you all get out. I can be a very good friend to have. - Largest behind you going. - Yeah, no. - Don't do it. - I'm good, no. - Blevins, he's going to sigh, he's going to say, "Unfortunately, lads and Lattes, I believe him, but you all have so much to live for. You're all so young compared to my old soul. So it is my duty to don this devil. Come, I say, inhabit this old man and let's be on our way." And Blevins will kind of straighten up and be ready to embrace him.
- Hot, so. You've made a very wise choice. I assure you, by the way, while I can observe all of your thoughts and feelings, they'll still be your own. I'm just along for the ride. - Oh, I'm not worried about you invading my thoughts. Maybe you'll learn something useful. - He's going to get this, how the Grinch stole Christmas smile, basically kind of creeping over him. You remind me of a former servant of mine, very loyal. Maybe this is the beginning of a long partnership. - Unfortunately, again, Darmok, I believe you are right. - He is going to, leap right at you and kind of, like you're going to feel his hands on your chest and then just sort of go incorporeal, just like phase in.
- Oh Nelly, here comes the glory. (laughing) - Cheese and crackers. - Does everything better than I'm coming, Elizabeth. Like just kind of a, just. (laughing) - He ends up on the ground convulsing. (laughing) - Turns out this was all a fever dream. This was just, we're at a Denny's, this, what do you, hell, I mean, only kinda like just, you know. And, Zach, you're going to level up one time. And we'll get into the rest of that later. The papers were signed, we'll get into the fine print at some other point, but that bridge is still there guys, still leading right to the front door of that temple.
Hey, what's everyone's thoughts and feelings on Blevins being two people now? - Yeah, Larg is immediately going to drop out. I'm going to drop back to where Tati is and just kind of lean over and be like, listen, if this gets weird, I might have to throw them off the tower. - Well, I mean, he said it, he's old. He lived a long life. - Yeah, I'd feel really bad, but you know, it's making it really weird. (laughing) - Okay, I guess we'll keep going. - No, just keep talking about how weird it is. (laughing) - Nobody there to like touch her shoulders anymore.
- Oh no, no more, just relieved. - None of that. - Unless Blevins starts doing it. - Yeah. - Were you going to say, how does it? - Nothing, nevermind. We'll figure it out in the game, I guess. - Yes, you will. (laughing) - Sometimes soon though, like Blevins, he stops moving completely and his tongue's out. Like, then he just gets up, like pure silence. He just stands up, like sits up, then gets up, dust himself off and he walks forward towards the, towards the tower and the door and he stops and turns back to the group and he says, all right, Tally Ho, young group, off we go.
- He gets more and more British as time goes on. Tally Ho is amazing, more of that. Tally Ho. - What ho? - Man. How about we take a break for just a second and come on back and then we're gonna dig into this tower. - Okay. - Yeah. - Can I ask though, mechanically, how it works? Like, is it like werewolves where like constitution, maybe Dharmak will pop out? - Oh. - Or is it like totally random? 'Cause we're dungeons are random. - No, no, no. Well, okay, not totally random. - But there is a- - So there is a mechanic, let me give you one of the mechanics. The worse Zach is doing, character sheet wise, like the worst things are, the greater the chance that Dharmak is gonna come forward and offer some sort of deal to get him out of a situation.
- Oh, I love it. - Okay, I thought, okay, I love it. That's dope. - It's stuff that's within his power to like grant, but yeah. - So sort of like what happened with Marek and- - Ooh, that's exactly what I was thinking. - A little bit. - It started with a beep, but the beep, but beep, but beep. - Barack. - Barack. - Thank y'all. - Sort of like that, but like it's, you'll see. Different flavor, but yeah, still cumin. So we're, you're gonna get to this tower here and there are these big double doors on the outside of it. And it doesn't look like there's any handles or anything like that, but it also doesn't look like they're locked.
So it looks like they may just like swing inward. - What would you guys like to do? - I think Blevin's leading, right? - He was walking forward. So I guess he'll just try to brazenly push the doors inward. Like he's welcome home. - You know what? I like your chutzpah. That's what we need. We need a pot stirrer. - That's what alien intelligence will do. It'll stir a pot. - I like that. Yes, and that's what we're doing here. We're not worried about consequences. Let me throw you on a map. (soft music) So a map should be loading up for you guys. - Hey, there it is.
- Yes, sirree. - And you should be seeing like an archway you're standing in. Yeah, kind of kind of dimly lit. So let's open the door in front of you. And it's pretty dark in here. There's going to be, if we walk on in, there's going to be some light, but it's very dim, very dim and blue. And essentially, once you get in here, the door is going to shut behind you. And yeah, you guys got torches and stuff. See, you can do that. And as you are standing here, those lights are going to come up like very slowly, but they're going to start to come up and kind of illuminate the place a bit.
And all around the circular room, there are going to be these large symbols evenly spaced. And they're in sort of the same style as the old gods, like symbols and stuff were in temples, but these are completely different symbols. Like it's all very alien and new. And does anyone want to poke around this room? Yeah. Heck yeah. Maybe we all spread out. I have a quick question. Hit me. So the last time before hell that we interacted with Vella, she was kind of in like a, I don't want to say purgatory, but in some sort of like in-between realm when, oh my gosh, Corvus was talking to her and she was like going to be escorted or whatever with some of the gods.
Were those the new ones or still the old ones before everything, like the change happened? At the time it was old gods, but like- I just didn't know if she might recognize some of these symbols, like if she had interacted with them in between then and waking up in hell. Like for a long time, it was almost like a site under construction, pardon our mess, that type of thing. Like where they're just dealing with, it's like, we're getting our shit sorted, we don't know. But the grand opening, it's like a ramen 101 is coming to your town. So here's, as you guys are looking around, sidling up right behind you, is going to be this rogue figure.
And they're just like, you can, this is a stone floor and kind of an echoey like antechamber type thing. And this person looks like a man, like looks masculine and is going to take this rogue down and kind of picture looks kind of orcish, but with elven-esque features like pointed ears, but like sort of looks mild-mannered, but like large. And is going to give a long beat, like looking at all of you. Welcome to the tower. And he's kind of gauging you for a response before he continues, just kind of like looking at you all. - He doesn't look familiar or anything.
- No, like again, kind of alien kind of just, everything's got this weird, it's like when you go to a friend's house and they make tacos and it's like, that's not how I make tacos. Like it's all very, it's like, well, you're making the same thing, but wrong. Like you're doing it wrong. - And the tower is? - I'm guessing you say that in character. - Yeah. - He's going to just kind of like nod and say, all right, that's fine, we don't have to do pleasantries, it's cool. The tower would be your second chance. My name is Serat and he's going to give this deep bow.
- Tati and she'll try to bow, but probably isn't exactly as flourished. - Yeah, Blevins will introduce himself. Blevins, Elmar Ruftefor at your service. I see there aren't any amenities or refreshments in this said tower. I believe we're here for a reason. (clears throat) I'm giving you five, a chance to right a wrong. Almost all of you were sent here, let's say undeservingly. And he's going to gesture to the far side of the wall and out of the wall is going to be this staircase that sort of slides outward. And it's going to go up into the tower like these large vaulted ceilings, like 20 feet high.
If you choose to undertake this challenge and you make it to the top of the tower, all of your sins will be resolved and you will be allowed to rejoin the land of the living. This is the fairest way that we could decide to deal with you all. I assure you, it is perfectly balanced. However, if you'd rather take your chances and the door is going to reopen and you'll see the outside again, you're more than welcome to leave this place. - So when the door back to hell opens up, Largo sort of nod in that direction and say, is this something that will be offered to everybody else who is here wrongly?
These four, and he doesn't count himself among them 'cause he came down here alive. And so he's like, these four aren't supposed to be here, but they're the only ones who are awake because of weird circumstances, but there's so many others. - And they'll be dealt with when the time comes. We have much work to do, but I assure you they will be dealt with and one way or the other, everyone will be judged. The challenge ahead of you, and he's going to kind of like gesture to the stairs, will be many and varied. It will not be pleasant and will be difficult.
But if you are truly worthy of leaving this place, then you'll all make it out. And he's going to look at Blevins. You will have a decision to make before the end. You are carrying a uncleanliness with you. - Well, I take offense to that, sir, but I'll pay it no mind. He'll kind of shift around uncomfortably. - I want you to make no mistake. I have no vested interest in whether you make it to the top or not. All I'm here to do is give you the chance and I'm making myself clear. - Very. - I think we understand the task and the opportunity we've been given, but I'm still confused as to who you are and who sent you here.
Why disappeared here? Is this just a matter of time? Why disappeared here? Is this just to right the wrongs of these people down here and we just happen to be the first ones awake? - There's going to be just a beat. Like, it's like, oh, that was rude. You're right, I'm sorry. And again, I apologize. I like to get straight to the task at hand. My name is Sarad and he's going to give a deep bow. - Order. My job is to balance the scales. And for quite a long time, things have been quite unbalanced. Again, going to look at Blevins. - And Blevins, he kind of looks back shocked and he just says, did you say the God of order?
- Indeed. - Well, I can see why you would take a shining to me. I'm a beacon of order and respect and cleanliness, usually things may not be as they seem now, but I promise you, I am a champion of order and I can show this through this trial and I can show I can be triumphant. (gentle music) We shall see. Every time you ascend a floor, you'll be allowed to wager. The larger the wager, the more floors you will go up. However, should you fail a task or be deemed unworthy at any time, you will be punished. And the greater the wager, the greater the punishment.
There are 100 floors to this structure. Good luck. And again, the good luck is kind of cold. Like he's not actually wishing you luck, it's more, it's like, and we're done here, stamp, stamp, okay. Like, well, depending on your activity, you may meet some of the other gods if they choose to make themselves known. 100 floors, that's gonna take us a lifetime. One per session. So to be clear, let's talk about, let's talk about the game mechanics of this. You guys remember travel die, right? Oh, yeah. We're basically using travel die rules here. Now, depending on your role, that's going to dictate what floor you land on, basically.
And that's your wager. So if you roll high, it's gonna be something, you know, truly like rewarding or simple or whatever, depending. If you roll negatively, it could be a deadly puzzle. It could be something not die hard this time. It could be combat. It could be traps. It could be anything. So. Cool. I'm here for it. Yeah, me too, I'm excited. Yeah. He's going to wave his hand and there's going to be a door that opens in this wall and he's going to open it. There's just kind of this mist pouring out of it, but like dark, just kind of a void on the other side.
And he's going to, he's going to walk through it and it's going to close behind him and that door is going to vanish. And it's up to you if you want to walk up those stairs and make your first wager, or if you want to leave. To understand the stakes. If you make it through this challenge and make it to the final floor and succeed, you all get to be brought back clean slate, completely forgiven newborn babes. If you don't. You're trapped in hell. OK, I think after this guy vanishes, Tatiana is going to look at Blubbons and say, look him up and down. So I guess we didn't need any help.
This seems pretty straightforward. Well, I wouldn't be so sure we don't know what we'd encounter. But well. Go ahead. Oh, I just did you see the way he looked at me? It was amazing. It was exhilarating. I could tell. It's just like a fanboy moment where you just that's what it seems like. Oh, no, we can't hear you. Oh, sorry, I don't know how I muted there, sorry. Blubbons grabs Tatiana by the shoulders and he says, don't you see? This is a sign for old man like me. I was chosen. You saw the twinkle in his eye. You saw it, didn't you? He knows the sacrifice, the plight I just went through, and he wants to reward me.
I mean, it's all this is my chance Tatiana, our chance. That's something grand. We've been servants. Oh, I've been a servant all our lives. This is our chance. That's something great. OK, sure. OK, yeah. And she's very visibly awkward by being like this close and being shaken by this old man. You he leans in. He leans in when you're trying to back away and says, he said I was unclean. This is our chance to make me right to make this whole. I think there's something grand in this for all of us. What do you think? I think maybe you should back up until you get a little cleaner, like the guy said.
Understood. And she's going to sort of brush off her clothes, so are we going up or are we going down? Well, I was looking at these 12. Was it 12 the sigils around the room? So if you like, I could tell you what each one of them say. There's like a little little placard next to each one of the plaque next to it. Oh, that's helpful. I wasn't expecting that. OK. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. You guys are taking notes. Yeah, yeah. And now's the time to take them. So do you want them? You know what? Let's do them in alphabetical order so that there's no there's you know, there's no order of importance.
We got all wrong. Doing the wiki right now. Make sure whoever's whoever's doing the wiki makes sure you're taking. Pan, please. So all Ron is the God of Wisdom. And Ambry is the God of Merriment and Celebration. I asked he is the God of Chaos, Entropy and Randomness. He Ross is the God of. Is the God of Knowledge. Yeah, so, OK, sorry, willpower, not wisdom for for all run. My bad. Ashira is the God of Affection and Acrimony. La Nica is the God of Nature. I'll give you a proper spellings for all of these, don't worry. Phalous is the God of Fear, Confusion and Ignorance.
Rick, this is the God of Life and Death. Surat is Balance and Order. Tersir is the God of the Beasts and the Untamed. T'er is the God of Aggression, Violence and Conflict. Umaag is the God of Corruption and Mortality. Morality, Mortality. What? Ashira, you said God of something and acrimony. I didn't catch that first word. Affection, affection and acrimony. Thank you. I remembered acrimony. I don't know why. The bad one. Just that. Just that. Just what I want to hear. And Vatar is the last God, and that is the God of Change and Renewal. There will be a doc posted in the basement.
Listeners, don't worry, you'll get one too. It may not be appearing in a certain book that's coming out at some point, too. Could be. Could be. And what book is that? Well, a little kickstarter that got funded. Code the Adventurous Guide to Theria Volume 2. That takes place in Talor. We are working on it, despite this year being this year and just just dandy, but we're still working on it. So I got a question for you guys, two questions, really. Are you are you going up the stairs? Are you doing the tower or are you are you booking out of here? Are the stakes?
Yeah. Tower, tower. I have a question. Hit me. Maybe I didn't hear it. When we're if we complete the tower. Sure. And you said everything's washed away and we're like newborn babes. Are we actually newborn babies? No, we ourselves. This isn't a monkey paw wish thing. No, no, no, no, no, no, no. This isn't like, where are you? DNR babies. And I was like, what? I was like, oh, I'd be like, you know, we're reborn. And then I'm like, that's the end of the arc or whatever. That's the catch is that all of our kids have to play for us. Oh, my gosh. Right. We finally get through the 100 levels and all of our kids take over our characters.
Well, you'll be aging out by that time. Yeah, that would. Yeah. Well, we were in retirement, so. Yeah. OK. Oh, sorry. OK. Sounds like the towers. So that front door is going to vanish as you guys start to go up these stairs. And then when you when you reach this, you know, essentially that was the foyer. This is like the first floor. Those stairs are going to recede into the floor and just it's going to be a flat plane. One by one, I'm going to call on you every time it's time to go up. And you have to tell me what your wager is. The four, the six, the eight, the 10, the 12.
And if you're feeling spicy, you can roll a 20. Now, remember, if you roll poorly, that floor is just going to be fucking garbage. If you if you roll well, then it's going to be it could be anything. It could be a reward. It could be a curio. It could be a bit of respite. It could be it could be anything. It could be just free level ups. It could be weapons. It could be armor. It could be anything. But whatever you roll is the amount of floors you're going to go up and you're starting on floor one. And Lisa, I'm going to call on you for our first role. The entire group can talk about it.
Like, how do you want to kick things off? Why? I'm I'm feeling salty, not spicy. So I don't think I'm going to go with the D20. Just putting that out there, because my last 20 roll was not very successful. OK. Oh. I'm kind of feeling like a 10. That's a good middle one. Yeah, I like that. Yeah. We'll say eight or 10. Do it. Are you guys willing to risk a d10? Absolutely. So out of all the gods, Sarada is the one that gave us the mission. Yeah. OK. Not even a mission. It's more just like and this is your opportunity. I know. Yeah. OK. Here we go. Do we have any clerics in this group?
Just curious. Yes. OK. We got it. We got a Karen. We got a joke. Me. OK. OK, hold on one second. Oh, OK. First round. OK, here we go. Here it is. Drum roll. Let's do it. Please be decent. Oh, six. It is just beside of good. Not terrible. I'll take it. Not not terrible at all. So that's going to that's going to put you at floor seven. And all this means is that it's a straight shot, essentially, instead of the regular staircase. It is just going to lift you up. There's a center pedestal and kind of a column light. It is you're going to be able to see floors as you go by.
And like you're already going to see it's like floor three. That's the demon dog floor. We don't want to go there. Like, you know, like you can see that like, oh, that and like you may even see it's like, oh, man, that one had a gun. We could have used that like weird like stuff on the walls that like as you're going up. And floor number six is our seven. Sorry. As you come up is just going to be this calm, kind of quiet place. There are benches lined up, kind of staggered about three feet apart from each other. There are there are bowls of like fresh fruit and things like that.
And essentially, by spending time here, you all get a long rest. Yay. It's not bad. Stuff like hungry. Yeah. This is more like so while you're in the tower, like you can actually enjoy food and enjoy stuff like that, like that taste of mortality alive again. Oh, yeah. Yeah. That taste. It's like, hey, this is it's like like you're like gladiators, right? It's like, hey, man, you're probably going to die any minute. But like, here's some grapes, like, you know what I mean? Like it's they're very sweet, seedless. So. I think we need one more role to close this out for the day.
How about it be the new Sera worshipper? Yes, if you'd like. Hey, I love a volunteer. What are you feeling? I'm I kind of want to go with the D20. Just put all my faith in Sera. Want to talk it over the team? Ah, I defer. Yeah, go for it. I mean, you're feeling it. Yeah, I appreciate that. You know what? Quick prayer to Sera. Lord and savior of order. And they're going to go for it. It's the start of a great relationship. Oh, my God, that was almost a one. Yeah, you know, Sera would not have what that is. My life flashed before my eyes. Pretty great. Yeah. Do you know that puts you on floor 20 already?
There we go. You just, you know, got to risk it for the biscuit. Sorry. I think that is a good time for us to stop for the evening and we'll continue this tower trial next time we sit down. See what the hell did I tell you guys? More ensemble hell. Darmach is inside me. That's how close we are now after this session. Beautiful. If the name of this episode isn't Darmach is inside me. Yeah, please. Believe. Yeah. What are we even doing here? You're right. You're right. What was the point? That'll get some attention right there. Engagement. Darmach is inside. What? Oh, Darmach finally went too far.
Let's see what happens. Another fan fiction episode. Oh. (laughing)