Grand Theft Aubrey

This transcript is machine-generated and may contain errors in names, terminology, or attribution.

Howdy folks and welcome back to Frostborn! Before we dive in, this is your weekly reminder to mark your calendars for Theriathon! On May 31st, noon to midnight Eastern, we will be playing back-to-back sessions live over on Twitch. This is going to be a delicious resurrection sandwich. If you don't know resurrection, that is a bunch of members from the original group one causing a lot of ruckus in old-school Tharia, with two groups on either side introducing more cast members to Fort Frostborn and their characters, including mine! This episode is brought to you by our friends over at GM Assistant, the ultimate tool for streamlining your tabletop sessions.

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Now back to Theria. Let's do that thing where we go around the table and introduce ourselves. Jason, I'm the Dungeon Master, going around the table. Starting with Ian. That was a good one. Oh man, I am jazzed. I'm fucking feeling it. Now hold on. I want to say, I am not one to pat myself on the back. I am one to pat you guys on the back, and it has been banger after fucking banger. Like I don't think we can make a bad episode of Frostborn. I'm fucking sane. Fuck you. I don't know why I'm so antagonistic. I'm sorry. Don't be mean. He's riled up. I love it. Stop being nice mean.

I'm sorry. You're so fucking good. Hey, I'm Ian. I'm a fan of Frostborn. I'm a fan of Frostborn. I'm a fan of Frostborn. I'm a fan of Frostborn. I'm a fan of Frostborn. I'm a fan of Frostborn. I'm a fan of Frostborn. I'm Ian. I am playing Chimera, the tiefling warlock. And Jameson. Oh, hey, I'm Jameson. I play Logran, the dwarven Marshall. And Susan. Hey, I'm Susan. I'll be playing Nythera, Rylith, the elven rogue. And last and certainly not least, Jasper. I'm Jasper. I play Ruby Pettigrew, the half orc gear slinger adept. Guys, you have reached level three. It is time for some of you to pick archetypes.

It's time for your class to become its class. It's really going to start taking shape. And as is tradition on Frostborn, we are going to roll dice for hit points. We're going to do that. And we're going to just very quickly run over what you guys have selected for your next level up. So. I mean, I know, but only because I have foundry. Like I use foundry in my own games. Yeah. No, I think it won't take but a minute. We'll get there. Oh, dude, it's super quick. We'll start with Susan. How about that? Yeah, perfect. Cool. I think I'm at a d8. I think that's my hit points.

It is. Oh, because I'm taking another level of rogue. It's just getting interesting. Yeah, you got to. Yeah, I'm going to. No, I'm going to skip all the fun stuff about leveling and just do two levels of every. Oh, yeah. Just multi-class forever. Yeah. Yeah. OK. D8. D8 plus one. So five more hit points. OK, perfect. I'll draw. What have you selected for your level three? OK, this is where it's fun, guys. OK, so this is just for the people out there who really care about cohesion and min maxing and stuff like that. And yeah, I'm I'm fascinated. Go. Sorry. OK, so my rogue archetype will be cutthroat.

Yes. So that means I'm a master or I could become a master of subsurfuge and poisons, typically taken on by assassins. So I get a bonus expertise with deception and then a bonus expertise with the poisoners kit. Good God. OK. And then I get master of poisons, which I learned the recipe for black blade, which I can make during any short or long rest. I can make up to two at this point. So it's up to my proficiency bonus. This poison could be applied to any weapon or piece of ammunition and then it deals an additional 3d6 poison damage. Damn. On top of like sneak attack and shit?

Yes. Oh, and let's talk about sneak attack. It goes up 3d6. So potentially if I'm attacking with my dagger and it's coated in poison, that means I do 66 damage with one dagger attack. And the rogue did 66 damage and they didn't even roll a die. And if you crit, that's double whatever you roll on those die. OK. So when you stab something, it stays stabbed like it is good and stabbed. Yeah. And then it's poisoned as well. So if it's a stab, but then on top of that, I get an additional skill trick and I will be taking analysis, which gains me another expertise die on poisoner kit checks.

So, oh, OK. Yeah. So when I'm draft, when I'm creating poisons or doing any poison check, I get enter wisdom bonus plus your proficiency bonus. Then I get six d6 expertise die because it's been upgraded twice. So you're basically seeing what poison would be effective against? Yes. Or when I'm crafting poisons. Yes. Yes. So here's my thought process. I'm just behind the curtain a little bit on this. So Neithira I've established as an older woman and she's she's aging. And I think her leveling is looking like instead of her getting stronger or quicker or just, you know, she's not young anymore.

So she's getting smarter and she's finding ways to get back to the way she used to be by adding things. I love that. It's beautiful. Yeah, that's cool. And a great analogy, if you ever watch Major League, the first one, there's a pitcher who has to rub Vaseline on the ball and do different stuff like that because he's not young anymore. He can't throw fastballs like that anymore. So it's exactly the same thing. Oh, exactly. Exactly. One to one. So as you're dragging a drop in that for the HP at the top, just say custom and then put in five. And that, I believe, gives you 19 hit points total.

That is correct. Which is good because you're not supposed to get hit. Hopefully. None of you are. Hopefully. Ian, how you feeling? You ready for this? Yeah. Oh, yeah, I'm ready. OK, so we're starting off with at level three, we have the Pact Boon. So that's like kind of. Yeah, that's a bit more of like what flavor is your warlock going to be? And I am going to go with the Pact of the Blade. So there's a lot of text here. I'll skip over most of it, but we're all familiar. We're pretty familiar with Pact of the Blade here on Dungeons. It's standard. It's as traditional as Eldritch Blast.

Yes, exactly. So and I am nothing if not a traditionalist. So yeah, it's a pact blade, you know, summon a weapon into your hand, you're proficient with it, can use your spellcasting ability for attacks and damage rolls with it, which I think is really cool. And yeah, a bunch of other stuff. So we're going with that. And then you get an Eldritch Invocation. Yeah, I get to learn Eldritch Invocation. And I am going to go with. See there are a couple here, and I was trying to figure out which one I like. It's neat because if you take a if you take a level, you can swap these out if you need to.

So if I need to swap this out later, go. But again, I think this is going to be like a kolgoth gift as it will like as flavor wise. And I'm going to take fiendish. He's a giver. He is. He's a giver. He's the giver in the relationship. So I'm going to take fiendish vigor, which lets you learn the spell false life. Oh, you can cast it on yourself at first level without spending any spell points or needing any material components. So it kind of it just gives like some backdoor healing, like a little temp hit points, I think. Yeah. Yeah. It's just a it's just a couple of temp hit points.

But but, you know, keep the keep the boy healthy is is what we're trying to do here. Can I get a D8 plus two? Yes. Yes, you can roll for those hit points. Let's go middle of the road. Six. OK. I will remind you, you've done well. Hit points wise, you're up to twenty eight. Nice total. Like that ain't bad. Yeah. Yeah. We're doing OK. We're trying to keep the boy healthy. And then I get I'm I learn one more spell, start using second level spells now. And I'm going to take suggestion because that one seems real fun. Oh, boy. We're getting to a point where there being no banned spell list, we're going to see we're going to see how this goes.

I'm going to test. OK, you go suggestion done. Oh, awesome. Thank you. Of course. And I think that's it for for warlocks level three. OK, Jasper. Yes, sir. Let's get going. One hiccup on the table is that my archetype is not over here. Fantastic. Good start. OK. I just said a link over. So it's on the A5E site, obviously. But. Ah, hell, OK. Well, hmm. I can tell you about it or and we can fix it later because I don't believe any of this is going to necessarily be an issue at the moment unless we get into a huge fight. Honestly, there's a lot of stuff we can just sort of manage.

Otherwise, not a big deal at this level. But it's called Durala. I'm going to call it Caro Durala Caro. It's got a little bit of a weird thing there. It means the way of the gun in the case of Ruby. This is, of course, like her Riz Balista. All of her gadgetry and that kind of thing. What it comes down to is a couple of things. She has proficiency in firearms, which could be, you know, sort of wrapped up into whatever her sort of gadgetry is. What's awesome is being within five feet of a hostile creature doesn't impose disadvantage on ranged attacks for that kind of weapon.

So you can imagine she could have her Riz Balista as part of her melee attack. She could just be like, smack, smack, thunk. Her ranged weapon like that will never misfire. And I don't need any sort of object interaction to draw or stow it, which is fine because that she has it on her on her arm anyway. I've got proficiency with gunsmithing tools, which the way that Ruby would use that is engineering and sort of upgrading her ballista. And I think that's just about it for the archetype. And I'm already making Jason sweat. I'm just trying to figure out.

OK, here's what we're going to do. I'm going to pay for this. I know I'm paying for this. Oh, not at all. I want I want it to be perfect for you. I just didn't know. I didn't know. OK. Oh, and she can reload without having to worry about any sort of actions. Reloading is just immediate. It's part of the action. So I can buy Zeitgeist, but it's not a module. It's just the PDF. So that does me no good. OK, here's what we're going to do. I'm going to earmark a subclass and begin making it, but only so that I can come back and fill it in later. Yeah, yeah. And then we'll worry about the rest of that later.

The details here are are easily managed narratively. Yeah, it's not it's really not much of an issue. I bought it because there may be a point at which you might need more from it as the levels come. Hey, if I know in advance, Jasper, I could totally have that ready on. OK, we'll look into savant. Just that class. Just look into it. OK, honestly, I got someone playing a savant. OK, cool. Yeah, I do recall Jasper this morning in Discord being like, can we talk about our builds? And everybody's like, nah, we'll save it for the show. That's true. I didn't want to bring it up, Jameson.

That is true. You're right. You know, honestly, though, you know, what I what I assumed was the case was, hey, if it's on the A5E site as a it's its own page, it's been converted. That was my assumption. Oh, how I wish. Oh, good to know, because mine's off of the as not in the core book either. And remember how easy we were. It's true. It's true. We had green see through controllers that we were playing with. Those are the halcyon days just five minutes ago. I didn't know there were other books, though. I need to check those out. I know so many other books.

So maybe I might have to check out the A5E website and then start mapping out levels levels and you go down some cool rabbit holes. I didn't know there were so many. There were more options for warlocks. Just going to have to check that out a little bit. Sorry, this is taking a while now. I am the instigator. Yes. I'm amazing. I got it and I'm going to drag it on there. Oh, you're doing it. OK, doing it unless you're doing it. No, go, go, go, go, go. Where do I drag it, though? It's not. Oh, no, it says what? Where is it? I got it. Don't you worry about it, baby.

I got you. Hey, hey, hey. I got you. So focus feature. Which did you pick? Well, that is easy and should exist. No problem. Deflect missiles. So what this is going to mean is that not only is she a ranged attacker, that can also be a ranged attacker in melee, but that she, as a result, is really good at missiles coming at her in any way, shape or form, can grab them, slam it right back in. Yes, she can throw it right back or slam it into her wrist ballista and shoot it right back, like all in one big move. She can range her melee and she can melee the range.

Exactly right. Exactly right. I mean, given the right roles, right? None of that is automatic. Would you do me a favor? Just give me a flat D8. Don't worry about the modifier because I ended up having to take that off. It does that automatically. Oh, my God. That's a true rule. Well, not a crit, but Max. So eight. Awesome. So that gives you twenty nine hit points. Amazing. And while we're here, I'm going to add some inspiration for myself because. Oh, can we just do that? No, because last session, whenever she got her necklace gift, got it. This works more than one hundred gold and she gets it for that, although I can't seem to have myself inspiration.

Maybe you could do that for me. I appreciate that. You already have it. That's why. Well, there you go. I need new glasses. I do, too. Last and certainly not least, Jamison. Not a ton of choices for level three marshals, but obviously the big one being the archetype. So for that, we're going with an archetype called Lionheart. Which is pretty neat. Excuse me for a moment. I'm going I'm going for it. Wow. Jason just muted his mic and he is crashing out on camera. This is crazy. I'm uncomfortable. I'll just change it. It's fine. Violence. I don't know why that was the straw.

But wow. Computer parts just flying everywhere. Keyboard smashing. The keys just flying past the keys. I don't think that's blood, but I don't know what else it could be. I don't know. I know you have an extra tower behind him to break. Yeah, I got it like that. Well tell us about Lionheart. Far from war rooms and strategy tables, some marshals lead by example, inspiring their crew with flashy maneuvers, cutting wordplay and acts of courage. Their commitment to personal excellence compels people to follow them. Because I think flashy maneuvers when I think log-ring.

Setting down a shield. Yeah, he's got one. But he does it very cool. Yeah, the cutting wordplay is like, "Ruby!" All right, so maybe the description doesn't one-to-one match up. Well the good news is this was way faster now that I knew. The ability I get at level three is very cool. It's called Inspiring Leader. At level three, when I make a successful melee attack roll, I can choose a number of creatures equal to half my charisma modifier within my commanding presence range, which is within ten feet of me right now. They get an expertise die on their first attack when it's their turn.

So if I actually swing the weapon myself, whoever's close to me will get a bonus to their attack when they go next. Nice. Wow. Pretty rad. And that's it. The only other thing I get, it's not a decision, I just get it. Mark Foe. So what that is, is as a bonus action, I can choose a creature I see within 30 feet until the start of my next turn. You get an expertise die when you attack that creature. So I'm handing out expertise dies left to right. Oh shit, yeah. Mark Foe putting it on enemies and then the other one puts it on allies. Could you roll a d10 for me please?

I feel a one happening. No way. No way. No way. Oh my god. [Laughter] Well that's for picking a la carte. That's for... Wait, what's your HP at? 21. So I have a constitution of 10, but as a dwarf I get an extra HP so I actually get two hit points. Oh shit! Okay. Well then we've doubled it. So 23 is your total. You still have four more than I knew. Oh well that's something. Oh wait, sorry 22 should be the thing. Yeah should be 22. Yeah, because it... Oh man, okay hold up. Did you do the dwarf thing automatically? Is that why? Yeah, didn't know it was going to do that.

Good. Alright, okay. Bonus HP negative one. Right. Mine says it's you Jameson, you're not alone. It's going to bother me until we level up again. Well when you get to the city there's plenty of people. Like start killing. Start picking fight flips. [Laughter] You go that way, I'll go this way. Nobody survives. I thought you said not to do this. Grand Theft Aubrey. [Laughter] There's the next shirt right there. Yeah. [Laughter] Alright guys, let's pick up after a long rest. Everybody give yourselves a long rest. Now the long rest itself I do want to play out because I want to ask some questions.

Some pretty heavy stuff was tackled during our ghost escapades right? And I would imagine after you guys are done you get the necklace and you do the thing you were trying to do when the ghost thing started which is just find a place to sleep. Hell you might even chose that cave. The ambiance is it leaves some stuff to be desired but at least it's warmer than the outside. But as you guys are doing the long rest thing you got your campfire, your you know, is there any conversation about what just went down? Because. I mean Ruby, Ruby's gonna eventually you know show everybody what the ghost left her and she's gonna actually I say that left them and she is gonna say it whenever they once they're all sort of like whatever making dinner or whatever it is finally calm down everything's okay.

Logran and Ruby aren't fighting anymore about engineering issues or whatever. Look what I found and she's gonna sort of she's already put it on but she's gonna kind of just show it off a little bit. I think he left it. I don't want to make assumptions but I kind of think he left it for me but if anybody else wants it I don't want to you know how this goes right? This is like this has probably been a conversation before where they all sort of split things up and she's you know hedging. Ruby we're not in the orphanage that that was your ghost that's your necklace it looks great on you by the way very rustic.

Love the teeth. Thank you. I'm feeling like I could you know maybe do better with it. I don't know. I got some ideas. I would maybe make it a removable item because I noticed something was different when the ground trembled as you walked up behind me. I thought that was my velocity springs. You think it's this? I didn't notice it until you put it on. Well give it a try. Give us a twirl. Yeah so it'll be like like kids in a in a getting new shoes kind of a thing where it's like just walk up and down walk up and down. How do they feel? Where are your toes? Kind of like that.

The ground is shaking as you're walking. You have to imagine she's not just walking she's walking but now that she's self-conscious of it it's just very awkward like like like this. Yeah it's a light trend like it's yeah it's not boulders coming off of the sides. No but it's like it's like if you guys were. And now for the cave where Campton collapses. Great. Wonderful. Yeah and and and what it does is just enough that it it imposes disadvantage on any sort of stealth check that she might have mechanically. So this is just the way I she probably didn't notice it because she figures her boots are humming anyway because of whatever upgrade she's been making to it.

So she might not even noticed it but it just didn't bother her basically. But yeah she's going to take the necklace off and on and and and just kind of shrug like I don't get it but it's different. Yeah it's haunted. She's going to shoot him a look. You say that about everything. She shoots him a look. She's the guy who's haunted yeah. There's just like a shadowy hand goes. He's like stroking his face. That's what I'm talking about. That's exactly that's exactly what I'm going to go back to cooking breakfast is exactly what I'm talking about. Well I like it.

I think I'm going to I don't know make use of it honestly and honestly mechanically also I think she needs to technically she needs to attune to it. So I think she probably would be sitting with it for a while trying to figure it out not just what button do you push but I think it would warm up to her sort of in an arcane way probably through the night and over you know the next day or so or whatever. Yeah when you get them when you get any kind of artifact like that you got to get a butt groove in it. You know what I mean like you got a it's the Birkenstocks.

Yeah you got it better than Birkenstocks. Okay I'm so low class I don't understand a word of what you just said. Yeah I realize. You realize I'm trash. Do I do I know. They're the leather sandals that you see hippies wear. Yeah they're fancy. They're on the pricey side but you need one for life that's it like you never have to buy another pair. And the reason is that the soles are made of a cork material that over time it molds to your feet and that's a two I mean basically Birkenstocks are attuned they're magical items I never thought about it before.

But attuned. Attuned. Attuned. So that's going to take you know she's very happy with it and I think she's going to be real excited about the fact that she made friends with a ghost. I mean this is I mean she will always think of that as her ghost. Always always always and will think fondly and wonder how the ghost is doing and etc. Totally in hell but like. Thinking of you waiting down to the ground. While Ruby is playing with her new toy Nytheera is going to set up make sure that her bedroll is set up for her near the fire. Honestly until the morning she won't notice it because she'll probably get so exhausted and realize how tired she was that she'll just roll over onto it onto the bedroll and go to sleep and then the next morning she'll kind of piece it together.

What are we looking for in Aubrey? Who are we looking for? And I know we've got a list of things to get. Anything we can sniff around see if we can get there and is this person that we're meeting going to help us with that? Probably not. No. So we're trying to find a stone's hunter. They're hard to find. But I think we can find the one who's there and if not then fine we move on. But there's a lot of people we need to miss in the meantime. As for the list I think almost everything on that list even if it's not illegal to own it's probably too expensive for us right now.

Which means we need to find other ways to get it. Which means we're probably not doing that in Aubrey but we can keep an eye out we'll see maybe. I was thinking while we're in Aubrey while you track down the stone's hunter maybe Ruby and I could hit up a library just see where if there's any ore veins for adamantine around ore. Known areas for jewels. Just an idea. He takes out the list and he's kind of just reading down it. He's like yeah some of this stuff some of it seems obvious jewels fine adamantine fine. We got to get a leader of vampire blood.

That's not going to be an Aubrey. I did have an idea about that because the wizard did say that were werewolf teeth. Right was one of the other. We could find we don't necessarily need to find a living werewolf. You want to dig one up. We could research. If any famous werewolf has died. Exhumacorps. I mean listen right now we've got a list. What we need next is a list with a plan so we could at least get started. That's all. Happy to do it. I want to know who we're trying to avoid. Yeah actually that brings up a good point. Listen and she's going to get she's going to kind of lay in on Lagerin for a second.

Because they're comfortable doing this. You and me we've been around this whole goddamn planet. We've been to all these places we've been to Ebony Harbor we've been to Athias. We've been to the gates of Doomhurst and you almost wanted to knock on the door. But the one place you told me you never wanted to go. Was where we're about to head. So what gives? You're really going to make me talk about it. Alright so he's like he's like rubs his face and like combs his fingers through his beard and like pinches his nose. It's like alright. Listen my whole family is an Aubrey.

We're not supposed to be. How much do you know about the Great Forge? Not a lot. Yeah it's in Stonesunder. It's this great thing that when the long winter started. They decided to build it to keep warm to keep industrious all these things. And there were a lot of different clans that were tapped. To take part in it my clan was part of it. Cragborns or Masons were stone cutters or carvers. And so we were going to shape the mountain. To make room for the forge. Long story short something happened. Something got cracked and split and the whole project almost fell apart.

Sabotage basically but we can never prove anything. We got blamed for it. And we got thrown out. I was a kid I was maybe five so I don't remember it much. But we grew up in Aubrey we moved next door. And we helped with the church. You're going to see the church there. We helped build that. It's fine. It's probably like a beautiful church right? It's amazing. Yeah it's fine. It's whatever. It's the centerpiece of the entire city. Yeah and so the Cragborns probably had played a huge part in that. But he's like it's not Dwarven though. We had to make it in the human style.

But I grew up with my uncle and my father. In a haze in a stupor. I don't know what it was. The shame of it. The disgrace. They just tried to forget about it. They didn't talk about it. And when they weren't drunk they were angry. And I tried to get him to change. I tried to get him to ask to go back. See what needed to happen. You know as soon as I was old enough to understand. They wouldn't talk about it. So when my uncle died 20 years ago. I just left. I just went back. I went to Stonesunder and I knocked on the gate. And I asked for my clan to be reinstated.

And they said no. And I did not go back to Arbour. And I told myself I would not go back into this town. Until the answer was yes. So I went to Overdale. Went to Brightport. Trained myself. Took work as a mercenary. Found you three. Made a plan. So we're going into Arbury. When I didn't want to be there because I'm not ready. Because the answer isn't yes yet. So I don't want them to see me. Because what they'll see is somebody who failed and disappeared for 20 years. And that's not what I am. I'm somebody who's got a plan. And who's going to come back in 21 years.

And the answer is going to be yes. So when we're there, I'm not a Kragborn. Because I don't need to have that conversation. When I come back with the right answer, I'll be a Kragborn. And I'll welcome them home. And he looks at Ruby. He's like, "You happy?" She looks a little bit like she maybe shouldn't have pushed so hard. But then she'll say... She's going to... whatever. She'll stand up and get her bedroll ready or whatever and sort of move away. But as she finishes it up, she just says, "I don't care what you call yourself when you're in there. You're the most Kragborn, Kragborn that's going to be in that city.

Probably anywhere." I think you're probably right. I know we've brought this up before. But how different do you look now than you did 20 years ago? I don't think very. Hairs a little longer. I'm not dyeing my beard. My beard is a sidelong glance at Chimeric. I was just going to say he just looks at her like, "Okay." He's all ready. He's got his stuff. Just puts it down. I thought you could do magic for that. You don't have to dye it. Well, it will be magic, but it's probably going to involve a wig. Wigs are fine. I can do a wig. Wigs? Great. We'll take a few years off your face.

Maybe change the braids around in your beard. What we want to go for is completely uninteresting, right? I can do that. Yes, making no impression whatsoever. A dwarf. You look around in a crowd, you see a dwarf. And that's it. That's all they're going to see. I hate to say it, but that armor's got to go. And the shield, probably. Giant Kragborn sigil on it. You're probably right. Are we close enough that it makes sense to do this makeover now? Are we near enough to the gates? I would maybe get a couple of more miles of hiking in before you take off your armor.

But, you know, just in case there's a bad roll. Because I need one more from you. That's fine. So we can say that we're probably getting on the road as they're going through. Like, "Well, you've got to change your armor. We're going to braids and all that." Yeah, okay. Kogoth would definitely be like, "We could shave him." If you shaved him, he would be like the angry guy in Inside Out. The Lewis Black character. Just a brick of a person. When Chimera whispers under his breath, he's like, "Maybe just my initials." "I see." But peek through the curtain in the middle of the night, as the scene, to justify the leveling up for Nythera.

After she's done meditating for four hours, she spends the rest of the evening reading her poisoner's almanac. Of course. I assume she did that anyway. One day, we're going to circle back to this "none of us need to sleep ever" thing. We're going to circle back to that. Because I feel like there's a gross misunderstanding and I need to look into it to make sure. But I feel like you've got to sleep eventually, but we'll see. I don't know. We'll see. I mean, the elf thing's been around since like at least third edition D&D. Yeah. Yeah, but like everyone all of a sudden just doesn't need to sleep.

Like you can just whittle all night and it's like, "Oh yeah, that's just like sleeping." Yeah. I'll cite my source if you want. No, I know. I know. It's not worth picking a fight over. Oh, he just doesn't like it, that's all. It's just, it feels wrong and maybe I just need to adapt. I don't know, but it feels wrong. I like it. It doesn't feel human. It feels, you know, other, which is nice. Mm-hmm. Ruby sleeps enough for everybody here. Yeah, exactly. Two of us don't stop sleeping and then... Yeah. I need a travel die roll and it's the last one. No matter what.

But to get to the city, not the last one. Right. Maybe. Maybe. Depends on how bad it is. I think we need to put it on Susan. Okay. Okay. Okay. Just a quick little D100. Nothing huge, nothing crazy. Just the biggest dice we got access to. How about a 19? 19? Interesting. The blow equal bad? It doesn't really, no, it's just a, yeah, it's a real mixed bag. Oh no. You guys are going to get close enough to the city that you can see wagons both leaving and going in. Right. And it's like they're off in a distance, but it's close enough that I think it would be safe to start.

Whatever you're going to do to Logran, do it. Like, you know what I mean? Strip them down, shave them, like whatever you do. Die them, whatever. No, no, no. Make all those kneads. Yeah, we're going to, there's an old drag queen trick where you put something tight around the top of the head to pull the skin back. Yeah. So we're going to do that and put like a wig cap on and just put like a different kind of wig. And then we're just going to like, we're going to do a very masculine paint on the face, but just to like highlight some of the features to make them look a little bit younger, a little bit more chiseled.

But we're going to stipple on that so there's just like a little bit of dirt. Because again, we're like going for not to be seen. Like this is just a face in the crowd. You've been on the road, you know, like, yeah. Yeah. And then, and then does he have, does Logran have braids in his beard? He does, yeah. I think if he'll allow, I think, and please tell me if this is wrong, but I feel like the braids in dwarven culture are like tied to either like a family thing or a status thing. Like they maybe tell you information about something like maybe what you do or who you are.

So he will, Kamira will take those braids out and put new braids in that sort of look like, who was the guy we met in Winter Haven? Sin. Sin, yes. We'll put braids in that look like sin or that were like sins, braids in his beard. Yeah. And that's the only part where he sort of flinches is when you go to like comb his braids out of his beard. And he's like, let me do this part. So he has to brush it out himself. And then he'll like, if he can, he'll help with redoing it to look like like cinnamon's too, because like he's obviously, that's the part he can do.

Yeah. And I think and I think Kamira is like holding, he's either holding a mirror or he's like helping you do this part with with your braids. And he's like, you know, I know you have a certain thing in mind for returning to Opry, but failure and success often don't look like how we imagine they are from where we're standing. You're could be walking in there, you know, you've got a plan and you've got a team, you're on your way to what you're trying to get. That's that's a success in a lot of people's book. Yeah, but you haven't met my family. Oh, but I'm excited to know.

Well, next time we'll give him a miss. Like he's holding his head very still because he's getting his beard done, but he gives him like a little little head shake like. Well, who's the stone sunder then? What can you tell me about him? Anything so I can get to know him a little more. Yeah, that's an excellent question. Jason, which stone sunder is here? Do I know that? I don't think you do know which. Okay. You don't know which is where. You just know that there is a stone sunder here. Okay, so do I know? Yeah, sorry. Good. I was just going to ask, are there like any clues as to like what part of town they're in, what they're up to?

Are they behind like closed locked doors or like do I have anything? Do we have anything to go on? Well, there's kind of one or two paths. Either they are very loud about being a stone sunder and, you know, proud of it and angry, or they're living in disgrace and they changed their name to just like you did. So you'll find out very quickly if it's the former. Like it will not take long. Don't forget Ruby's got she can tap into her street network to to get a pulse on that. Yeah, I mean, Ruby and night there right away. Both of you have networks we can hit immediately, right?

Yeah. So, so, but to answer the question, he'll be like, to be honest, I don't know. All I know is that there's somebody here. I hope it's one of the easier ones to get along with between you and me. None of them are easy to get along with. That's what I've heard. Well, I'm very easy to get along with. So That's right. That's why you're here. I'll keep it smooth for us. Why are they here? Why are the stone sunders here? I understand why you're all here. But what about them? That's part of what I want to know. So all I know is the only stone sunder that didn't kick out was the queen.

She's there and she's in a coma. The one sleeping, right? Okay. Right. So the rest of them got thrown out and I want to know as much as I can about that. I want to know why she's still there. I want to know what they know about her coma. I want to know what they know about the regent sitting on the throne. I'm sure they've got all kinds of information. It's just a matter of getting them to give it to us. Okay. Well, you are looking great and younger. In fact, you could take on this look permanently, I think. It looks real good on you. Yeah. He'll look in the mirror and be like, "Wow.

You do good work." Thank you. Hey, Chimera, who's your friend? Ruby, it's me. Oh, you're joking. Okay. He's single. Yeah. There's reasons for that. My laugh was ninth year's laugh. That was out loud for next year. On the way, there's a few roads that lead in and out of the city, but you'll get a clear view. For those of you who have not visited Aubrey before, it has undergone massive changes in over a century. One, it is essentially this huge circular city. There are rings to it. There are walls that are a little like Winterhaven, but there's no... To everyone's knowledge, there's no arcane reason as to why the city is warmer within the threshold of the walls.

The clergy of the city are, it's like, well, it's our faith that keeps us warm. And everyone's like, "Okay, yeah, that's okay. Right. But like, how? Like, how does that work?" And so within the walls, it is just common knowledge. It is just taken as it's like, "Yeah, that's, that's, that just is, you know, don't question it. It's fine." And the closer you get to the center of the city is the closer you get to, like the highest of high holies like the the upper clergymen, the, that is where the massive church is in the center of Aubrey. And it is so large that nearly everyone in the city can fit within it at one time.

And they hold a monthly mass that is mandatory. Everyone has to go. Look, it is, yeah, it is. I hate that. I lived here for so long. It was terrible. Yeah. So boring. And me, just. So there is, again, a safe, a safe place, but a safe place in a, there's a very strict HOA way. You know what I'm saying? Like, you. It's a safe place, but it's not necessarily a free place. Exactly. Yeah. So just for clarity, Lagram is not wearing his armor. His shield and his armor are bundled up on the sled that has all of our equipment. He's just dressed in regular civilian clothing.

I imagine that we did his hair and beard up to look more like probably a merchant, somebody of that, of that type of class. And as soon as we get past customs to get in here, he'll kind of nod to Nythera and to Ruby and say, "Go see what you can find out." We'll meet you in the center of town. Well, let's, let's get, let's get through a few things first. Let's, let's back up a sec. I apologize. Yeah, we got customs. No, nice try, James. It didn't work. Describing the center of town, I thought we were already in, so I apologize. Well, I'm just, cause you've been there.

Like you've been around. Like you've been to church. No, no, no. You're fine. You're fine. We got to go back to that 19. We got to, we got to. Oh yeah. Oh. So three dragons. No, right. I thought the 19 meant you had a nice walk. Pleasant day. There is someone stuck on the side of the road. It appears to be one female trying desperately to push a cart out of a mud hole, but it, it, it is. It looks like it was frozen over just enough that when her cart went through, it crashed. And now just, there's no traction just stuck in there. And she is just cursing and pushing.

And when she sees you coming down the road, she'll, she'll kind of like, like kind of wave. Hey, hey, can I get some help just for a minute, please? Ruby looks at Lager. It's real tough to be walking and ignore like it's very difficult. I've been parked with those red lights. All right. Ruby looks at Lagerin. Yeah. She's like, I don't know the skeptical look, but she's like, you know, like, I can go. Is there, does this woman look like she's got money? She's got a whole wagon. I mean, it looks like, it looks like she might be a merchant. There's, there's a kind of a covered portion of the wagon in the back that think like a mid-grade SUV type of thing.

Like she's doing well enough that she's invested in her transport, but not so well that she can afford to have people go with her and protect her. Like if something happens, you know what I mean? So there is. There's no ambush plots around here, are there? It's pretty, it's, it's pretty wide open. Like it is, you know, there's a couple of shrubs and trees and stuff like that. You can always give me a perception if you'd like, if you're untrustworthy or untrusting that is. You're untrustworthy, but like she doesn't know that. I would rather roll an insight on her if I could.

I was just going to ask. Sure. Yeah. On her help, help, help. Yes. Yes. Sure. That's a 15. 15. She sounds frustrated. She sounds like she's maybe been stuck here for, for a little bit now. And there is a, as you get a little bit closer, there's some fancy kind of embroidering on the back of the, there's like a little tarp on her wagon that says Megan's masks. Ruby will say, whisper under her breath to everybody, cover me. And then she'll walk up, little show, showmanship of it. And she'll be like, I gotcha. Let me help you out here. And then she'll kind of really just honestly try to help the lady basically trying to buy you time to see if there's anything else nefarious here while she does it.

Can you give me an athletics? I sure can. It won't even be that much. Like it's just, it's getting up under it and just pushing it out a little. Well, there's a 13. 13 is fine. 13 along with her, like it'll just muscle it out. Would have been easier if the rest of you helped, but that's fine. That's, that's fine. So I imagined you're kind of putting your back into it and just, you know, and it'll lurch forward and everything will kind of shake for a second as it rights itself. And then like, she'll run forward and kind of like stop the horses. Like it's like, okay, it's okay.

It's okay. She will instantly whip around and, and give you a big old hug. Oh, God. Thank you. She'll be taken aback, but then Ruby will just give it, she's just like, Ooh, free hug. And she'll just take the hug. And she'll, when she's done, she'll, she'll pat the wagon here and she'll say, what you, uh, what you got in here? In a very kind way. Like just like, what are you up to kind of a way? Not like what's in here. Yeah. Yeah. So she's a halfling when she hugs you, her, her head is like chest level with you basically just, you know, big old, but like she's got some oomph.

Like she, she kind of squeezes just, just to skosh too hard, you know? Yeah. And she's, you know, you guys are standing by the back of the cart, everything. She's just going to kind of go. Masks. And just like point at the embroidery. Like it's, I, I, I make masks. You make masks and sell masks? Like, yeah. For parties or for celebrations or? It started as a local thing really, but I, you know, I've, I've, I've done custom jobs for clergy and everything before too. Ruby's going to just put her head around the side. Hey, Blackbird, come check this out. She's talking to Nythera.

Nythera will walk out. What's up? She makes masks. She's going to, she's grinning. I already got what I need. She kind of looks a little disappointed. She's just, I, I just, I just, I knew you like masks, so I thought you might like masks, but. And then Nythera's going to walk back. I mean, yeah. Yes. What type of masks do you have trying to appease Ruby? I guess I'm looking for masks. Well, how about, how about you guys just jump in the back and I can give you a ride to the rest of the way here and you can peruse my wares. Walker's already climbing in the back.

He already was doing it when she was like, dragging the shield up into the right. Anything in a hard case is premium. And I got some stuff in the dark aside. If you, you know, you, you, you, you seem like a, like a lady who, um, it has things against colors. It's easier if you keep your wardrobe in one color. Black goes with everything. I get it. I get it. And women of my age makes me, it always looks good. I lean into Ruby and it's harder to see the blood. She stifles whatever she can. She's going to while, like, she'll keep hollering back into, into the wagon here, but like, she'll jump up onto the, the cart and just like, it's like, you know, let's go.

Like, just take you guys the rest of the way. They're probably like, you know, like half a mile, something like that, but it's nice. Cool. Bouncing in the back at some point, Ruby's going to realize and say, wait, what's your name? Oh, Megan. Like again, almost like if there were two words, one of them's a name. Well, I didn't, maybe Megan's your grandmother. I don't know. Oh no, my grandmother was a bitch. No, no, no, no. Megan Fields, if it helps. If you've met a bunch of Megan's. Nice to meet you, Megan. What you guys going to the city for? To see the cathedral.

I hear it's lovely. And big. Oh, it's big. Honestly, I look, it's, it's a lovely building, stained glass, everything like that. I would have made a few decoration changes and maybe the shape, just the general sculpting. It's, it's fine. It's fine. Ruby, Ruby puts a hand on Logger's mouth. He's doing nothing. He's like shifting to sit forward in his chair to be like, all right, listen. It takes two people to put their hands on him to get them to stop. My dear is probably sitting up front with Megan and she says, I heard it was built by fine dwarven craftsmanship.

I'm sure I got nothing against it. They were told what to build, right? Like it, you know, it's a construction gig. I'm just saying, if you've ever gone in for mass, the seating, if you're in the back, the seats aren't elevated enough. So if a Goliath sits in front of you, you can't see. So maybe that's a me problem. Need a booster. Do you sound like you're either from Aubrey or you've been here plenty of times. We've never been. Is there something besides the cathedral that we just absolutely shouldn't miss? Like, like tourist trap things? Oh, not the tourist stuff.

Like places you would go, you know, maybe somewhere that you like to eat or somewhere you like to visit or something you like to see. Well, I could tell you where I would go, but I've, I've, I've been here a bunch of times just to, I've outfitted all the Templars. I've outfitted clergymen. They've had big masquerade balls, so I've done masks for that. They always have a theme. So one time it was just birds, which is a little boring and you know, it is, do you have any feathers I had to go get? But just, it is so vague. It's just birds. This woman's going to insult every member of our party.

She's like, you know what I hate? Gears. I hate gears. Like she doesn't have anything against birds. It was just, that's the meant birds. Like that's fucking vague. Like what do I like? What kind of birds? Like, you know. Next she's going to say she hates cabals and circus folk. That's okay. I'd understand. Yeah, Camaro's the only one who's like, yeah, no, you're not wrong. I get it. I've never been on this end of it, but I imagine getting vague commission work is frustrating. Right? Like it's like, Oh, here's my D and D character. They're an elf. Make them cool.

Like it's like, what? Like that's nothing. Like that's, you know, I don't know. Have you ever made a mask or sold a mask to anyone super important here in Aubrey? They're, they're, they're a loud thinker. So like while they're thinking, it's like, like making noises, just kind of like, you know, just, well, I, I don't think so, but I always had an inkling that I made one for the high chancellor once, but I, I can't think of one. I, I can't, I can't prove it. I didn't get to meet him. How do you, how did you know though? It was just 10 times more expensive than anything I've ever made before.

And it had an enchantment in it, which took a little longer, but you know. That's amazing. I wish we could afford something like that. Just humble travelers. I don't even know if we'll be able to stay very long in Aubrey. What with what we've got. But you must make a ton. You must make a ton with, with these amazing masks and the amount of bird masks that you've made. It's just incredible. I'm sure you, you live a very easy life. I'm traveling alone in a cart. No, not really. It costs a lot to make them. So, you know, when I sell them, the commission's usually just enough to get me down the road a little bit.

I would stay in Aubrey if there was enough business. But the problem is I make such good shit. It never breaks. It never wears out. The enchantments always stay. So there's no need. Oh, oh, that's so interesting. What kind of enchantment? Is it a family secret? No, no, I can tell you, I don't care. Mostly just protection stuff, but sometimes transmogrifying and zipping through walls, that kind of stuff. That's why they're so damn expensive. Oh, I see. Oh, gotcha. And you're not charging for your labor and expertise? As much as I can, but it's hard to tell the church, you know, I have to charge for my labor and they go, well, we're doing work of gods.

So it, you know, it's the low boy. It's reliable work, but they're cheap. Cheap pricks, most of them. I understand. I understand that. You know, they don't even pay taxes. Mostly considering they own the city so that it's a, you know, they don't have to, they just, they just, you know, so if you're staying in the outer ring, which is where a lot of working class people check out Bonzo's. Bonzo's. Oh my God. Best dive bar. Gotcha. Bonzo's. Lovely. Just good atmosphere or good food, good drinks? Great food, great drinks. Theming's a little dumb, mostly gears and steampunky stuff, but like...

Fine. I thought we were getting away from it, but no, no, you had to punch. Megan. She means well. She's just, she's opinionated. Oh, how gauche. Chimaera just turns around and winks at Ruby. But it sounds fun. It's warm. It's just loud. So it's just like tick, tick, grind, grind, bing, bing. Like there's always something making noises. You just can't like... Overstimulation. Yes. You ever like, and okay, the owner's great. Bonzo's a great guy. He'll make you anything you want. Talk, talk, talk, talk, talk, talk. Real talker. You know, you ever sit with somebody, just talk, talk, talk, talk, talk, squawk, squawk, squawk.

Can't let empty air just fill a conversation. Ruby is going to be leaning forward. Like she wants to get into it. Just a little bit. You can see her squirming and slithing. Now she's gotten all of us. Check, check, check, check. Now let me tell you about demons. Wait a second. Yeah, Koga. Hey. Yeah, I'm just, Chimera is just enjoying the conversation and as we go, just trying to learn some stuff about Aubrey. Oh, you know what he does ask though? He does bring up, he tries to drop in like Stone Sunder though, just casually, like just to see if it, if she's heard or if she knows anything about Stone Sunder in Aubrey.

Probably something like, oh, I, you know, I don't know if any Stone Saunders have been to Bonzo's or anything like that. Do you think that they would show up there? I don't know. And there's gonna be like, there's, there's almost going to be a beat. Like she thinks she, she almost thinks you're messing with her a little bit. Why are you asking that? It's just a name I heard. I heard it's pretty, you know, famous here in Aubrey and we've never been. So we're just kind of going off of the things that we've heard about. The exciting stuff. It's the cathedral.

It's the, it's the, in the center, right? Right. That's it. That's it. That's where we heard about it. Yes. What? You guys aren't debt collectors, are you? Oh my goodness. No, no. Do we look at, we're just travelers like you. We're, we're, we've got no cart. I collect debt. I do collect debt. I can tell you that much. All right. Okay. Okay. You, you, you, you guys seem, seem all right. So you guys are talking about Arbeck? Arbeck? That sounds familiar. Yeah. Yeah. Arbeck. Stone Sonder. Yeah. He basically lives in Bonzos. He's got a running tab that I don't think he's ever going to pay, but Bonzo is just too nice to kick him out.

Sad to hear he's fallen on hard times. Tragic. Well, I think he's drank every meal since, I've known about him. Sounds like a dwarf to me. Well, I mean, usually there's some kind of, you know, open mouth chewing thing. Dwarves, you know, they tend to enjoy their food and do it loud. I don't think I've ever seen him eat. We joke around and say he's on a liquid diet. Hmm. I've known a couple of people like that. It's usually something, something awful that they just can't get over. Do you know what, do you know what caused him to change his dietary needs? I mean, I don't know that much about him.

Kind of a rowdy drunk, you know, real braggadocious. But like, everyone who knows him says he's a nice guy, like Winnie Sober, but... That's kind of the problem, isn't it? Well, shame, dang shame. You know, I've seen it 100 times, unfortunately. Not in Aubrey, but in other places. Well, the good news is it's in the outer ring, so the heralds don't get out there too much. He doesn't really cause a big fuss. He just doesn't want to go home, you know? I don't know if he has a home. He's got to have somewhere. But not in the outer ring, huh? Oh, I don't know. Again, I don't know him that much.

He's like a landmark, you know? He's like a fixture of the bar. Instant, yes. I gotcha. Yeah, he makes as much noise as all the clicking and whistling and grinding, you know? Drown his sorrows, drown out his brain and noise. Yeah, I get it. I understand. Well, maybe we'll run into him. You guys are going to pull up to the gate and there is a have you ever OK, I have traveled to damn near every state. California is the only place where I had to stop for a customs check for fruits and vegetables, because that makes sense reasons. But like, yeah, no. Yeah. And it scared the shit out of me.

Like, do I have any untoward fruits or vegetables? Like, I don't. I don't know. So when I came through with a moving truck, they had to check the truck like they had to check. It was crazy. But this is pretty much what's going to happen. You guys are going to pull up and they're going to like halt. And there are two burly looking paladins, fully covered white cloaks, white hoods, like, you know, their face completely, completely concealed. And they're going to walk around just kind of inspecting the cart, checking things out, open the back, open, you know, a couple of cases and stuff like that, and then just kind of wave you in, just allow you to go by.

The entire thing takes maybe a minute and a half, but it's it's one of those things. They don't say anything. They don't say stop, they don't say have a good day, they don't say anything, they just hold up their hand and everybody knows just to stop and then they move through and wave them on in. I don't think we got anything to hide. No, I mean, like, again, it's not a problem that you're a tiefling. It is a problem that, you know, so there are spot checks where they just randomly. Like double investigate stuff, and they have they have seals and stuff they use to check to see if anyone has possessed gear on them.

Oh, that's not good. Yeah, or let's say what is a possessed gear? The demon hosts, all kinds of stuff. So like that's there's like a one in 10 chance for that. And the 19 you guys rolled, you're fine. Well, don't I hope they don't profile the tiefling in our group because that's going to look real bad on them. Yes, yes, but. It is also going to set back tiefling relations a few years. Yeah. So you've had the chattiest Uber driver, right? And once you guys are into the city, can I can I drop you guys off anywhere or are you just you're just going to take the foot tool?

Just we'll drop out any time, honestly. Ruby's thinking of like, remember, she's with her street smarts. She knows how to keep everybody from being in the middle of anything. Right. So she's really thinking about Lagerin. So she's like, drop us off as soon as she can. We'll be we'll drop it right here is fine. And she'll she'll stop everything. All right. You guys enjoy the city cathedral. You can't miss it. It's that thing. And like she's just going to point to the sky that it like that dominates the fucking like. That's fine. And Ruby shakes her hand and oh, yeah, it was such a pleasure.

Thanks, Megan. Hope we see you again. Thank you guys for helping me again. I really appreciate it. I don't think I could have got out of the ditch myself. Any time. Hey, charge charging more for your masks. He's right. If I see you somewhere in the city during my stay, I might have a business proposition for you, but I have to see how things go the next two days. OK, that sounds real good. If you need an advocate for your pricing to let us know, I think we can help. I've never been good at telling people how much stuff is. I almost want to sell it for cost because, you know, it just feels weird.

I like doing the mask thing and I like making them so it feels weird charging for that, you know. That's ridiculous. You charge what you're worth. I don't know what I'm worth. Like she's going to like whisper a little bit like she doesn't say it loud and proud in the city where she's about to charge something. But like, I have no idea what I'm worth. Megan, that's what we're good at. We'll help you figure it out. All right. Well, if I do see you in Bonzo's, I'm going to buy the first round of drinks. And depending on how well I do, you can buy every round after that.

A good start to our business proposition. I hope we see you again, Megan. She'll let everybody go and just venture on into the city. You're going to notice that indeed. After you cross the threshold. You know, there's these big circular walls over everything and you can see the next set of circular walls further into the city. It's kind of sectioned off that way. When you walk through, there's no magic dome. You can see the sky clear as crystal. It is like lightly flurrying, but none of it's reaching the ground. It is a good 30 or 40 degrees warmer in Aubrey than it is out there.

No wind, no nothing. It's fucking weird. It's almost like you guys are in a different dimension, but can see out of it. Like, do they have like God favor or something? It's one of those things where even the people who wholly believe something's fucking weird or wrong or something like that on the off chance, they are favored by the gods and they're wrong. They don't want to call them out. It's like, wow, I better get proof first. Like it's one of those things that, you know, comfortable here. Don't even need a jacket. Yeah. Ruby's taken her during any sort of outside of the town.

She's always wearing this leathery. It's got straps and buckles all over it with like with with fur on the inside. She's sweating and she's like, she was already taking it off. She's like, I'm boiling. I'm dying. Yeah. And Lager became visibly more tense as we got further and further into the town. So he's like, he's just like a knot of tension right now. And he's just kind of sitting there and he's like, he's like wringing his hands almost. He's like, well, don't get too comfortable. We've got to lead. As soon as we get what we need, we're getting the hell out of here.

What time of day are we coming in through the gates, Jason? It's just afternoon, I would say. So, you know, it's it's as warm as it's going to get outside, basically. The streets of the city are immaculate, right? It's almost polished stone like it's cobblestone streets and everything. But these are very well maintained and cleaned. No litter, no nothing. You'll see probably every block there's probably like a light city guard type of thing. But they're barely armed and their job is to alert heralds if things get real bad. Heralds are almost literally the judge dreads of Albury.

They have trained so extensively and it's rumored that they have been favored by the gods so much that they are extensions of the gods will so they can literally judge someone on the spot and execute them if need be. If the crime is severe enough or if they've resisted it like it is. And they don't speak. They don't. They they they speak here and there, but very rarely, very British guard. They just stand there stoically. So they have a great sword drawn planted in front of them and they're just holding it. And they'll watch you go by like sometimes they'll focus on a certain person and like I hate to say it, they're going to focus on Chimera, not because he's a tiefling.

He's got an aura about him of like trouble. Like I'm going not only am I going to cause trouble, I'm going to make it a production. I'm going to make sure like there's just something about. Yeah, like yeah, no. These guys are anti swag. Yeah. And as you walk in, there is this this this kind of main square, almost like an amusement park when you walk in where all of the gods are depicted. There's a big friggin like bronze statue of each one of them kind of surrounding the one of the main gates. And there is a big stone tablet right in the center of it. And it says, let others be frozen and fearful.

Our faith warms our souls. From the jump from like it could not be clear what these people are about and what this city is about, and it's a friendly way of threatening people almost like it's like, don't fuck up. Like just it's like, hey, welcome to the city. Please visit all the shops. Check out mass. Maybe you maybe you join. I don't know. Well, I can check it out. It's very friendly. If I see you drop that fucking candy wrapper, I will cut your fingers off right here in the city square like it is. There's an underlying like Disney security. This is Disney World.

You're describing Disney World. So and I think it's very much like visiting Disney World with somebody who used to work there. Right. They're just kind of looking around like that's fake. That's fake. That's that's all just a facade. That guy's drunk. Yeah, that's like that guy makes three dollars an hour, you know, that type of thing. So, yeah. Palamids don't get paid like their service to God. But that's the payment. And he's looking at the brass statues. It's like we didn't do the brass. The brass is tacky. We did that, though. And he's like asleep. Just pointing to the sky where the fuck?

He's like crawling out of his skin, though, right now. He's like this is way too central for him. And this is where he'll turn to. Let's see what you can find out. We'll meet you at Bango's or Bonzo's or whatever. Was the place there when I used to live here 20 years ago? Because he would know what it is if that's the case. It was there, but it wasn't like a landmark. It was, you know what I mean? Well, yeah. So we'll say I'll say he knows it then, because that's most of what his family did in exile, too, is get smashed. So, hey, that's great, because there's a good chance that there's also a Kragborn.

Yeah. Hooray. Yeah, we'll find out what we can. Thing is, I'm not sure I'm going to see a whole lot of urchins here, to be honest. I don't even know if there's a Pettigrew anywhere close. And honestly, I have a feeling I'm not going to see that much of what I usually see either. Yeah, this is interesting. This place is like anti-Petticoat to both of you. So like the outreach programs in this city are fucking phenomenal. There's there's home placement for well, I mean, the term orphan is very rarely used because kids get adopted like they, you know, some some join the church, some you know, some, you know, are interested in helping others and stuff.

I'm wording it like the threat is there because Logran knows about it. If you guys were walking into the city blind, I would present it a little differently. But again, you have someone who used to work at Blockbuster, the you know what I mean? Like that, you know, that that that shine of you watch all the movies you want. It's like, yeah, I'm fucking dead inside. Like, you know what I mean? So you know about that. But there there are good things. Crime exists in every city. The stricter the laws are, the harder criminals will have to work. Which means you're shaving off, you know, lazy criminals or.

So the only thing left is like the thieves guild. You know what I mean? Like they would have to be underground. They would have to be. So sorry. We all had someone in our lives that I had a friend who worked there and every time I saw them like they were so dead behind the eyes. There's something about that job that just like Shang Tsung's your soul out of you. I don't. Yeah. Yeah. John, John worked there until we were there when it closed. We got all the DVDs that they didn't sell. And like, yeah. Oh, that's sweet. OK. You had to have the blockbuster jewel cases.

You didn't get the happy ones. OK, that's sweet. That's sweet. That's still free DVDs. Yeah. But yeah, OK, so Nytheera would would in her experience, knowing that even the cleanest of cities are a little dirty, would scope that out. So. This this is so tricky because like, OK, thieves can't is a thing. It's used exceptionally sparingly because the more of a footprint you leave, the easier it is to track. And I want you to do me a favor and give me a perception check. So you and Ruby are kind of splitting off and exploring the city and you're just kind of ducking down some back alleys, looking around, just like you're you're you're exploring, trying to look nonchalant.

But at the same time, it's like, OK, where's the telltale signs of like, you know, you know, for a fact that there are no pickpockets. There are no because that's that's a one way ticket to death. Right. So there has to be. Even if it's like two or three people, there has to be some contingent of, you know what I mean? People like you who, if they're staying in Aubrey, don't want to stay in the local motel. Yeah. Could I argue because I am using like I am proficient in thieves can't. Can I argue in expertise? Yes. Yes, actually. That's perfectly that's totally fine.

Nice. OK. Oh, how about a 19? Oh, OK. It's going to take you an hour of just walking down. And when I say bad alleyways, I just mean they don't have quite as much natural light. There's nothing terrible about it. Again, there's some really good outreach programs, so you're not going to see any turned over hovels or people sleeping in the streets. They they are placed somewhere. And most of the time it's like, well, look, man, you can clean up in the church. You can serve. You could do something like that until you're able to get back on your feet. Get back out there.

That's fine. Like no one's enslaved to the church. It's just. It's that or die. Yes, exactly. Like when someone you know, it's like if you're working on the Death Star and has a great 401K and dental, like it's like, oh, man, you know. Yeah. Yeah. OK. Vader walks through every once in a while. But like, you know, just don't make fun of them. Yeah. Don't catch his eye. It's fine. Yeah. Maybe that guy who stood up and like called his religion fake. Don't do that. What a ballsy play by the way. Your whole religion's fake. Like just in a board meeting. Like, what the fuck?

Like, man. Anyway. Sorry. Have you met me? I'm sorry. You know who I am, right? How do you imagine this playing? OK, you're going to get to a point where there is the smallest symbol on someone's door and and it's almost like an old hobo thing where it's like, hey, this place is fairly safe to stop if you're looking for something, which means they might know somebody or connected to somebody or they have more information about almost like a brochure. It's like, oh, what's to steal in town? That type of thing, you know? And it's just a nondescript closed wooden door.

It looks like someone's house. I'm so bored. I'm so bored. Yeah, this town is pretty clean, but you see that there and she's going to point out the mark. Yeah. That means this could be our kind of people. So this is Bonzo's. She's being snarky too. She's been doing this for an hour. You've had to look behind you and she's doing something else and like you're having to drag her around. It's like bringing your kid clothes shopping. Exactly. I sympathize like I am bored. Either we can make note of this as being a place where we could use it for future use as a possible sympathetic ear.

Or do you want to talk to whoever's here, Ruby? There's nobody else to talk to. She's going to look like, oh, yeah, let's talk to everybody else around here. Let's just go on in. I don't care. She's not mad. She's just bored out of her mind. Yeah. Night the Air is going to knock. Because this looks like someone's home. I'm not going to walk in. Yeah, that's I was okay. Breaking and entering might not be a first impression you'd want to make, but like, you know. After a few moments, this not just slightly older woman, probably in her 50s, is going to answer the door and kind of like peek out like.

I'm not expecting anyone who, you know, and she's dressed like a nun, like she's like head to toe. She's. Can I help you? Yeah, I think it's going to take a moment to because remember the Mass Effect thing I mentioned earlier, like the BioWare choose the right dialogue options? Night the Air is going to think for a moment if perhaps this woman moved in after that symbol had already been there. I thought maybe a friend lived here but I may have been mistaken. Well, who are you looking for? I'd be happy to help you find them. Okay, so my theories, former alias is not well known to the general public, but it is well known in certain circles.

Sure. This might be one of those circles so Nicira is going to go, or is going to say to this woman. They used to go by the name Raven's Breath. This woman's just gonna look perplexed. Like, like she'll, she'll, she'll think about it. I don't know anyone by that moniker, are they with, do they live in the city? They used to come into town every once in a while. You're gonna hear. It sounds like someone's falling down a set of stairs, wooden stairs from within the house. And these tiny hands are going to rip the door open the rest of the way. And there is a, there is a, I also okay.

Definitely a teenage girl tiefling. And is going to just like, it's fine. It's I got this. I'll show them around. I got nothing to do this afternoon. Anyway, you got hymns and stuff to memorize. Thank you. Thank you so much. And she'll kind of like push her back into the house and then pull the door shut behind her and get right in your face. And just kind of like examine. Oh my God. Oh my God. Oh my God. Oh my God. Oh my God. You're her. You're her. You're her. Like there's gonna like, as you look at her with narrowed eyes, she's going to look at you with narrowed eyes and she comes up to like your chin.

So just say it. You're her. No one else knows that name. No one. I've. Oh my God. I studied so hard about. Do you know how hard it is to get books about. And just like motioning to do you know how hard. I'm guessing you're the one that made that symbol gesturing to the one. Oh, yeah. No one knows what that means. It's fine. Kind of. Nonchalantly in referencing something that could get her killed like. No one knows what that means. It's fine. What are you doing here? Are you going to assassinate someone? Are you speaking in a whispered tone, but way too fucking loud to be saying the things she's saying.

Nightdear is going to put a hand on her mouth. Which does nothing to dampen her enthusiasm. Ruby's going to when you put the hand on her mouth, Ruby's going to put her arm in her arm and she's going to start moving like we're going to walk down the street. And hey, I'm Ruby. What's your name? Wait, is this like an initiation thing? If I tell you my name, you were to kill me. Nobody's going to kill anybody. That's not what this is all about. I'm Ruby. What's yours? And just keep moving. Just basically trying to just change that person's mind. Get it off. Hyper focus.

Yvette, Yvette, but just Betty people call me. OK, are you like are you like her understudy because she's getting a little older and like you're young and like she's going to treat you like she's going to teach you all of her like. Oh, my God, are you here to assassinate someone in the clergy? Behind the two of them, Nightdear rolls her eyes and lets out a sigh. There's nothing like that is going on. This is all in your head. I promise. Look, we're just here. I am kind of a little bit of an apprentice to her. She's kind of an apprentice to me in a way, too.

But that's neither here nor there. The whole deal is we're in town and we're just looking for, you know. Bonzo's, do you know anything about Bonzo's? Just trying to change the subject until they could get somewhere else. Shut up. Yeah, it's a shitty old bar. Yeah, I'm not I mean, I can't. I can't go in there yet. Like I got it. Too bad. Yeah. Well, listen, we've got to go meet some friends. And I was wondering if maybe we could catch up with you another time. We know where you are and that's perfect. And she's looking back at Nightdear like, I don't know. You said you had access to books.

Yeah. Well, OK. Yeah. Like my my my grams has access to it. And so I just borrow her medallion whenever I need access to stuff. And like I. Yeah. I've been in the library a bunch. Oh, so there's a library. Number one, that's good. She's looking back at Nightdear like just kind of nodding. What's this about a medallion? Well, it's it's like the vault of knowledge. You need clearance to get to some of the stuff in there because, like, you know, they don't want just anyone learning about like demons and and stuff. All the cool stuff that you'd actually want to know about.

You're not allowed to know about it unless, you know. You have one of these and she will take the fucking medallion out of her pocket and just dangle it like this right here. Sneak attack. Stab. Would you mind if I borrowed that? I'm afraid to say no. OK, OK, OK, OK, OK, OK. And then she'll kind of like get serious. OK. You can borrow it. OK. And you just say it's it's it's Navi's and they'll they'll they'll kind of turn an eye. But you got to do something for me. Nightdear is going to raise an eyebrow, but smile because she likes this kid's moxie. OK, whenever you guys are done doing whatever it is you're going to do it, it just just OK.

You got to let me show you off to my friends. Smile drops. We have a whole underground society. You don't even know it's so cool. Do you know how cool it would be if I brought you there? You're like living history. Ruby turns around and said, that actually would be really cool. You've even got to kill nobody or anything. Nobody's killing anybody. She's stopping. Like eight heralds are walking towards you with swords drawn. Just like. I said you don't have to if you react, it's like you don't have to kill anybody. Don't. I appreciate your enthusiasm. I will visit.

Your friends. After I use this and she takes the very quickly and kind of showing off a little bit because this kid's excited by her, like takes it very quickly, like using her expertise in sleight of hand. That was so cool. Oh, my God. OK, OK, OK, OK, OK. If you need anything else in the city, you just come to me. You know where I live. It's back that way. And look, you come get me. And if you're taking any more apprentices, please, you have no idea how badly I want to be you. Just like. I OK. I've never killed anybody before, and I think I could work my way up to it, but it's going to you know, you just got to be patient because like.

I punched a guy one time that was as far as I got. Did he deserve it? Yeah. Then you're doing good. And she's going to look at Ruby, it's like, oh, my God, how many people have you killed so far? How far have you longed? You're going to have to put the volume down just a little bit. And we got to talk about one thing. But change the subject a little bit, talk about one thing you cannot mention. That you have seen us today to anyone. Do you understand? Not even like. So, OK, if I go back and I can't tell my friends, no, because that's the surprise, remember, imagine what it's going to be like for you to bring in, you know who.

OK, OK, you're right. OK, so. We just we need your candor here. Just what that means. Zip it, just zip it. OK, OK, this is like my first mission. I will not fail you. It's I'm going to go back to the house now and because. OK, just OK, let's just just good luck. Oh, and kid, the name's Nythera. It's going to be this squeal like like we're on a first name basis now, like that's so fucking cool, like. It's better than calling her Raven's Breath. Murder queen. But like to her, it's like being friends with Schwarzenegger in the 80s, like it's like, oh, my God, I know the Terminator.

Like it's fucking like, you know. Oh, living history, that hurt. I know, I'm sorry, I know. And let's hang out with Logran and Chimera a bit. So Ruby and Nythera got their own thing going on. They've already met some of the locals and now it's it's your guys turn. What how do you want to go about this? Do you want to go straight for Bonzo's or do you want to kind of like scope the place out a bit more, like get the vibe? What do you want to do with what I know about Bonzo's? Is there is it just a bar or a place to stay there? I want to I want to secure. There's an inn next door, like they're linked.

Yeah, I want to go to that and I want to check in because I want to be dragging my sled full of my armor and my giant shield into Bonzo's. But we don't have to you know, we can we can hand wave that unless there's anything special going on there. Once we check in at the end, then I think we're ready to go. Yeah. Get a room, put things down. What are we trying to get out of the Stone Thunder again? It was like why you got kicked out and some other stuff. And I forgot. Yeah. So basically what we're trying to find out, we're trying to ask the Stone Thunder why they were and why they were exiled.

But the other woman whose name is Nythira? No, you're Nythira. I've got it. I've got it. I've got it. Namaara. Why Namaara Stone Thunder is still in the city and all the other Stone Sunders were kicked out. Why, you know, any information on what Namaara Stone Thunder is stricken with that has her Hanukkoma? And then whatever information we have on this Nokell Grimhorn, who is apparently in the throne right now. The three main things I think we're looking to find out. Gotcha. OK. Yeah. And Lagram's being even for him, sort of really, really quiet and kind of.

Well, I'll just say it. He's kind of grumpy while we're on our way over to this place and while we're checking into the end. He's very like kind of curt with whoever. Just kind of in his own head the whole time. Yeah, I noticed you were a little bit short with the innkeeper and I just want to say they're just doing their best. They're just doing their job. Well, she should know we want soap with the bath. I think that comes with it. So I don't know why she asked. It doesn't matter. Whatever. That's true. I don't care what it smells like. Don't give me options.

Just give me soap. I don't care. This is someone you know or someone you've met before. Do you want to do the talking or do you want me to facilitate? Well, I don't know personally. I know that he knows the clan, though. Your clan, right? Yeah, he knows. He knows the and he doesn't even want to say it. He's like, you know, it's a crack point. He's like, he's constantly like looking around to like he doesn't want to see. I mean, I live in my hometown, so it's a little different. But like if you ever go back to your hometown and you don't want to see family or people you went to high school with, you're like looking around constantly.

That's a little bit of what it feels like. Yeah. So he's like he knows the kragworns, but he doesn't know me. The problem is, stone sunders are assholes and he's going to have a problem with you just because of your face. Oh, I see. Well, I can change that. He like takes a step back. He's like, you can. All right. Like how? Like I can be anybody. I could be a dwarf. I could be a stone sunder if you know one. Would you put a wig on me if you can just turn into a dwarf? Well, there are some things I can only do to myself. There are limits. But yeah, I mean, unless, you know, you want some of Kolgoth's power, maybe that could be on the table, then that could be something you could do.

All right. All right. All right. I'm sorry. I just, you know. Can I just say how cruel you like? OK, it is steak in front of a hungry dog. It's like, oh, if you want some of the kolkoth would be here in a minute. But him revealing himself in this city right this minute, he knows instant death sentence. So it's kind of like it's like, oh, I got a pitch for you later, though. Like just outside the city, baby. I could help there. It seems like, all right, let's get in there. Let's see who we see and we can make up a plan. Worst case scenario. Well, worst case, he's not there, but there's a good chance he's already pissed drunk, which is gonna be a problem because we're not going to get a lot of good information out of him.

So let's get in there. Let's see who's around. Let's make sure there's nobody I know in there. OK. And then we'll come up with something. Gotcha. Gotcha. Yeah. Why don't I just you know, why don't I just step into something more comfortable? And yeah, I'm going to turn into a dwarf. I was like, pull him into an alley first. Like, don't just do that shit. Oh, yeah. No, I assumed we're in like the room or something, but that's funnier. Yes, I'm going to use a little ability that I can just as part of being a warlock, I think I can just do disguise self on myself once per day.

Your type of warlock. I think you're a sexy trickster. I don't I don't remember what the exact archetype is, but you get it. Describe to us what you look like right now. Well, it's it's just like it's kind of it's kind of like what we did with Logran. Like it's just like when you think dwarf in your head, like that's kind of what shows up. And it's just kind of like really generic and not like there's nothing special about it, you know. And in fact, it probably like probably has similar features, like dark hair, like Chimera has and and maybe even like the the same colored eyes or something.

But yeah, just like the most like when you open up the player's handbook and it's got a picture of a dwarf, like that's what it's like. Oh, yeah. Right. Yeah. Yeah. OK. Got it. OK. So real like any any shooter you've ever played, it's like generic male number four. Like it's it's just that like the default skin. It's like it's like a white guy, short hair. Like it's that like, you know. OK, sweet. Yeah. Oh, pretty much. Yeah. OK. Yes. And looks like them. All right. All right. This could be yours. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. Well, if you're in the room, then there's no reason why.

Like, you know, you see the little hands that come up over his shoulders. You know. It doesn't have to be permanent. We could come up with some sort of temporary arrangement, make you safer in the city. Thank you so much. And I am so glad that you are here for your guidance and your power and that thing that you do with the thing. But now is not the time. All right, fine. And he'll he'll get ready and recede, but he'll just go like a quick kiss on the cheek and like. Come here. It does blush. Lagerin does see that. That won't happen. Yeah. Take a minute. Do what you got to do.

Splash some water in your face. We got to go. Yeah. Yep. Yep. All right. So, yeah, we'll we'll trundle downstairs and out and over to the over to the bonzo. Right. Yeah. So the two places are kind of they're connected. There's even a catwalk on the second story that links up with it because it's it's it's such a good business arrangement. Right. When you're too drunk to go home or you're it's a pop on over, you don't want to get pop for being drunk, walk in the streets. You don't want that. Right. So you just pop on over. And Bonzo's is loud. So the there's obviously either incredible insulation between the two places or some sort of magic barrier or something that someone paid for.

Because the second you walk in, it's it's like a TGI Fridays on crack. Like it is good times. People yelling. I don't know why TGI Fridays came. Are they still around? Hard rocket Dragon Con. I mean, come on. Hard rocket Dragon Con is it's not quite that loud. Oh, you literally have to scream. But it is. There's all kinds of bits and bobs in the place, like mechanical what's it's inside. So it's it's very like there's crazy shit on the walls. Welcome to a shenanigans. Like it's, you know, that kind of that kind of vibe. But everyone there, it like there's two stories to this place.

So there's the second you walk through the door, there's going to be servers to greet you and stuff. It's like, do you do you want a table or do you want to sit at the bar? What do you want to do? Very welcoming. Very nice. Nice. Yeah. Logran leaves Camaro to answer because he's already like craning his neck looking around like he's not. He's he's already mad about having to deal with the innkeeper. He's not dealing with the hostess now. I will say this might be the cleanest tavern you've ever been to. And the construction is immaculate. Like money must flow in and out of this place because it's it's serviced very well.

A lot of polished brass and things. A lot of crazy mechanical cuckoo clock stuff on the walls to like there's gears for the sake of being gear, steam pipes running through the place. Like it's it's very much to think restaurant. Yeah. Yeah. It's it's it's the first restaurant. And they're like closed on Sundays or something. Oh, don't put that on them. Don't know. I'm sorry. I didn't do nothing to the gays. Don't don't. They'll never franchise with that kind of rep. Don't. I kind of come here, kind of takes a look around and he's like, oh, thanks, water clock.

And he's just kind of like scoping for for this guy. He's looking for like a dwarf in his cups. I think that matches the description of the stone sunder. And if there is any table around him, like where is he and where can we sit nearby? Would you do me a favor and give me a perception? Try and do that. Sure. Because eventually there have to be rolls. Do one to. It's happening again. No happening again. There we go. He rolled an eight. Here's what happened. Oh, we're still in the same session. That's why it doesn't matter that the days later like it's we're still.

So you so this place is two stories, right? But you can walk over to the guardrail of the second story and have a look around. So you just kind of like scope in the place out. So they ask, it's like, oh, do you want to table? You want to sit at the bar? It's like, oh, first time here. Give us a minute. Like, this is a lot like it's, you know, whistles and steam coming out the wall. It is flinching every time something buzzes. Yeah. Yeah. Like someone tips or something like that. They have like a Flintstone steam whistle thing going on over there. Like definitely like it's like, oh, we got a birthday.

Like it's going to be like, come on, cowboy hats and do a choreographed dance. Yes. Sparklers in desserts and shit. This place is ridiculous. It wasn't this bad when I was here. I love it. I love it. I remember as I'm from. So he got an eight on perception, but logging at a 16, he's looking not only for this stone center, but he's looking for any Kragborns too. You're not going to see any Kragborns. They may have the same attitude as you when it comes to this place. It's like a two theme park, two and there's like some dive bar. They hang out. You know, it's one of those like, I know the owner.

We go back 50 years like that kind of shit. You're also not going to see a dwarf that fits the description of drunk office tits. Like, you know, I mean, like you're not going to like so you will see a messy table and a server is going over to it. And it looks like just drink after drink after drink. So your natural instinct would be like, oh, a party of people were there. But all the drinks are lined up on one side of the table and they're just kind of like shoved over like this person was plowing through. So they may have been sitting there like that's like, I think you knowing how a dwarf can put away booze.

Yeah. Yeah. Well, looks like somebody motivated was over there. Could be that. Hmm. Could be upstairs, though, too, because there's a second floor to this place, too. Yeah. And I mean, I imagine you're checking out the second floor while you're on the second floor. Oh, yeah. Yeah. We're looking for the hostess. We're going to take a look around first. This place is really neat. That's how I heard the venom. This is best attempt at being like personal about it. Like it's so cool. It's real different. So you just listen, people listen to you play podcast. Right in the pride.

Yeah. So we'll take a look around. And if it does, if there's no other. If there's nobody actively at a table that meets that description even a little bit, then and then I guess we'll go kind of explore the one that looks like a crime scene. Yeah. I mean, if you put away that many drinks, you probably have to piss like a racehorse. He might be out back. Either that or check the floor. Yeah. So you're going to make your way down the stairs and stuff. And several times you're probably going to have to stop while a server races by with a platter of food. And have you ever.

OK, let's do the millennial thing and make the substance reference. It's most million dollar birthday fries. It is. Do you remember most family feedback? Yeah. It is that it is like fireworks going up, like sparklers going off or someone who has a special meal or dessert or something like that. It is everything about this place is sensory overload. It is. But in a weird way, it's kind of comforting because you can definitely have a discussion and no one's no one can pay attention because there's no way that they could be picking up your conversation across the bar.

So that's a problem in regular taverns. Not here because I guarantee you in a hard rock situation, me, Bree and Jasper were literally screaming at each other and could barely hear. I think I shut down. I just got my sensory shut down. But it's tradition and there's only four restaurants in the area. Yeah, yeah. There next year, everybody. I like that he came here to drink alone like this is where he goes to relax. Crazy bastard is what he is. There's so many better bars in town. I'm going to one after this. This is great. I'll join you. I can't wait to see what he does for the free.

Make sure you can hear our voices. I don't want it to actually sound like the. Here's lots of whistling pipe organ in the back. Yeah. Clattering glasses. Like three ragtime piano players all going at once playing different songs. Please don't. It's all a camp town races, but three different versions and different speeds like. Causing you physical distress. OK, well, my brain keeps kind of trying to go to like the college bars that I went to when I was of that age and the descriptions keep dragging me back into chaotic theme restaurant. And it makes me more so much.

I you know what? You might have to take some strife before we get out of this. So what you're going to make your way over there. And by that time, like the server's picking up the seventh mug and they're putting it all on the thing. Just give me one second and I'll have this mopped up and you can you can have a seat. Oh, actually, no worries. We're looking for the person who was just here. They dropped this and I like pull something out of my pocket and I just wanted to make sure that they got it back. Do you know where they went or or what direction they left in?

It was a dwarf. Yeah. No, I know. I know. You know him. You're friends with him. Not not friends so much. We just saw that he dropped something. I want to make sure that it was returned to him. Oh, OK. Yeah. He probably just remember dropping. OK. I'm getting I'm getting that not so friendly to the to the serving staff, though. That's what that's what I'm getting from this, which is really unfortunate because, you know, you don't have a place. I know they're the backbone of this whole industry. Thank you. I absolutely am is comfortable with the staff. Probably too comfortable is how I would put it.

So pending lawsuit kind of way that. No, no, no. More in. He kind of whistles for us or. Oh, this is that he lives here almost that kind of way. And I understand he has a strict no tipping policy. And yes. So anywho, he's in the back alley, probably throwing up and he'll be back in in an hour. If you want to wait, if you want to go find him, I wouldn't. But, you know, I braced you for what you're going to find. I kind of I kind of look over. Oh, sorry. Go ahead. No, please go. Go, go. I just kind of look over a log and like, what's what's the play here? Like, what do you want to do?

Do you want to go in? Do you want to wait for him here or do you want to go get him in the alley where he's vulnerable? He goes to answer and then double takes to look at you and then you think we're about to go to. Yeah, that sounds like a what? Yeah, he'll he'll actually he'll he'll press a silver coin into this person's hand to be like, well, well, we'll cover his tips and we'll be back. We're going to go talk to this guy. Good luck. If you guys do want to eat or drink here later, let me know and we'll we'll take care of you. Actually, you know what?

Couple thirsty dwarves. He's out there. He's going to want something to refill with. You want to bring us around out back? Sure. Yeah. OK. Yeah. That's not the weirdest thing you've been asked to do. No, no, no, no, no, no. He's he could look. Two things you need to know. Eb gets grouchy when he's reached his limit and he's been cut off and. He holds more liquid than you think he would. So the alleyways probably. Filthy by now, just just be careful when you step out, just watch your feet. Understood. Thank you for the heads up. It's gross, but thanks. I wish I didn't know that.

She's got that thousand yard service industry stare. I know it. Yes. She's been here three years and it feels like lifetimes. It's like, wait, that YouTube video was 10 years ago. It's like, oh, man. Wow. OK. Yeah, we'll go we'll go out the back door and. And see who's who's who's retching, who's out there. Retching her piss and do we want to grab some drinks? I think that's smart. Like if we just had. She's going to bring about out to the back. Oh, she'll bring. OK, gotcha. OK. Yes. Cool. Yeah. Honestly, she feels kind of bad for you guys. It's like, look, you're trying to do a nice thing and man, you're going to be disappointed.

But OK, like, you know, just. You're going to walk through this bar, it's packed like it's very, you know, it's a good it's crazy because. If this bar existed in any other town or city like at this were bright port pickpockets would have a field day, right? People are bumping into each other all the time. It's too loud to like, you know, but since you get murdered, if you pickpocket, probably that's not really a problem. It's not worth the risk. As you make your way to the very back here, there's going to be a hallway and there'll be bathrooms and stuff.

And then as you get to the back door, you're going to hear retching like loud, forceful. Like dragon shouts like like Fus Ro Dah's into trash cans, like it is almost impressive, like you would think the abandoned alley behind Bonzo's would be quieter than Bonzo's, but in a way it's not. He has his own entertainment. Yeah, so the other girl just kind of look and be like, oh, I think we found our guy. As you guys open the door to go to the back, right, and you're stepping out into this alley. Which is in between two like big streets, but like the alley itself is pretty much like just probably like 100 yards in between big streets.

So it's just kind of for, you know, trash and stuff like that. So not like a threatening back alley. It's not dark or oppressive. It's just not very populated. And this guy is going to pull his head out of a trash can to see who's coming out the door. And in doing so, he's going to step back and accidentally fall into a large garbage pile. And there is vomit all in his beard like. Yeah, yeah, and he's just kind of on his back, just. Always a good position to be when you're vomiting is on your back. Now, hand dress time. You've lost so many good ones that way.

So at a glance, can I tell if this is a stone sunder, like, does he look like one or is he too covered in puke to. Kinda. Yeah, it's like so stone sunders back in the day, more so than now, had a lot of BDE, you know, like just big dick energy. They'll tell you how great they are. So they would have certain tailors. They would have ways of dressing that it wasn't fully armored or anything like that. But it's a way to send a message. It's like I'm better than you. Like just, you know. So he's still wearing that stuff, but it's filthy and kind of tattered and stuff like that.

Like it's like it's there. But, oh, you have seen better days. It's like someone telling you there's still TGI Fridays and you're like, wow, really? Like staffed like you're just kind of like shocked. Do we know this guy's name, too, or do we just know stone sunder? I can't remember. So the mask lady said the name RBEC. RBEC. That's right. Thank you. But the waitress just called him Ebb. Ebb. Oh, right. Yeah. Not Arby's. Not Arby's. No, not Arby's. This whole situation does remind me of an Arby's. It does. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Would you rather go to a populated chain bar or an Arby's to eat?

Listen, I'm from an area where we have actual roast beef sandwiches. I've never actually set foot in an Arby's in my life. So he stopped recently on a road trip and it was the biggest mistake of our lives. Every bad thing you've ever heard about an Arby's is true. So don't roll your eyes at me when I say we have better food here. We don't need it. I know. It's just I know. I know. I'm sure. All right. I don't want to get into a fast food debate in the middle of the episode. God. You're right. You're right. Yeah. Thanks. You're right. Yeah. Loggering is going to basically like pull up like a crate or something and be like, we might be here a while.

That's OK. I I actually pull out like a little handkerchief or something and I go over to Ebb and I just kind of like pat him on the back and say, get it all out. Get it all out, big guy. Get it all out. And I offer him something to wipe his mouth with. You can have the handkerchief back, but it'll be forever changed. It wasn't intended. It was a gift. It was intended as a gift. So he'll just kind of like a like a like a clumsy animal with no thumbs, just like paw at his face with this handkerchief. Thank you. Thank you. You can put him away. Are you still thirsty?

Are you buying? Yeah. We heard you maybe got cut off. So between me and my friend here, we got another round. Just a couple of friendly dwarves having a drink in an alley filled with vomit. It's not full yet. Right. But it feels like home and and that's why it's nice. What are you saying? Feels like home. Just feels familiar is all. Just that drop of a dime getting that that that that drunk mentality of like, now we're fighting like it's like just yeah. He's going to calm down and like, fine. OK, where is it? It's coming. We're having it. We're having it come right out here.

You just got to make sure you get all the big chunks out and you're OK. Yeah, I'm good. And he's going to try to stand up and it. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. Just gently down to the trash pile. You don't need no need to leave. Just just get comfortable. Just get I pull up and I pull up a box. Yeah. You're right. You're right. And he's going to like, OK, it's the saddest fucking thing you've ever seen as a dwarf, as the logron in the trash pile. He is going to like wiggle in a butt groove. Right. And then kind of make a makeshift throne as the like.

Like he's got high like it's so sad. It's so sad. It's like watching a punch drunk old boxer. I used to be the captain of the football team. Four touchdowns in a single game like it's like he's sitting there in this. I get it. Yeah. Oh, wow. What a well, what do you want? Well, yeah. We're just looking to talk a little bit, and as long as you feel like talking to us, I'm fine with buying you a couple of drinks. OK. All right. You're going to get like that higher pitch drunk voice. Now we're friends. Just until you raise my ire at all. Like just. All right. OK. What?

Hey, brothers, what clan you with? Grimble, huff. And I'm stone son. He's going to tilt his head like. Can you give me a deception check, please? Sure. I can. Oh, God, I mean, I know this particular episode, your roles have not been incredible, but I feel I feel a good one coming. Can you write? Can I argue that this is a cooperative deception check that we're both performing and give him a goddamn expertise? Die. Yes. You know what? Yes. And my teamwork thing means you get an additional plus one to. That's awesome. Hopefully that'll do some heavy lifting and we'll it'll be fine.

There's no way he'll roll on both dice. Stop, stop, stop, stop. You are a shit. Come on. This is got to be good. Christ. Even still, though, even still. Yes. OK. You rolled a three, but got a 16. Thank you, expertise die. All right. So. OK. All right. Even at his worst, he is a very good liar. That is what I built this character for. If nothing else. If nothing else, he is not good at anything else. But this. So like, there'll be a second where there's like, like static, like he's like, well, that's almost my name. Like, but like, I don't remember that. Yeah. But like, he's just going to like go by like, it's just like, oh, OK.

Yeah. You make it fun of me. Yeah. What? Well, we're just a couple of historians, actually, and we've been trying to get an account, a true account. See, that's the problem. It was it was Arbeck, right? Arbeck, can I call you, Ebb? Is that OK? Yes, fine. You're friends. All right, Ebb. We've been trying to get a true accounting of some of the things that have happened in Stone Thunder Mountain and some of the historical things that happened. And we cannot get anyone to tell us the truth or give us an actual account of it. Not one that that, you know, sounds like it's credible.

We heard about you and we heard about your history and we thought that's a guy that can help us out. That is a guy who we should talk to. He can give us the information he can he can set the history right. So that's what we want to know. We just got a few questions and we'd love to hear your actual historical perspective on it. If you don't mind, we'll share a few drinks, we'll share a few stories, maybe a few laughs. If we got to throw up, we'll do that, too. Just about the time you're finishing up, this poor server is going to pop out into the alley tentatively.

Like, first of all, checking the ground. Am I going to slip into a pile of something, a puddle of something? You know what I mean? Logger will way better be like, no, just follow this path here. Step on the empty trash. Step on the pallet boards we laid out. And this, OK, servers come in ranks in my head, right? You've been there long enough that you've you've you've seen a little bit of everything, right? Steadfast and ready. Like she comes out there and the smell of vomit hits her. Vomit and garbage. And you're just you're going to see like the tiniest micro expression of like, hmm, and then just muscle through it.

And just it's like, here you guys go. All right. I give her another coin, another silver coin. If you need anything, just bang on this door and I'll I'll come running out. And she's kind of giving a wide berth a little bit. Yeah. So he'll just kind of lean over because Kamara is doing most of the talking right now with that. So Logger will lean over and be like, just come back in 10 minutes with another round, please. Did you give her money? Yeah. Why? Because I bought the drinks. But that's that's wait. But that's money on top of drink money. You just given her money.

She's just doing her job. Listen. Hey, he's loud about it. Like he's like, yeah, yeah. Yeah. It's like, listen, you need to focus. We got some important things to talk about. This douchebag saw Reservoir Dogs one time. And he's oh, no. Yeah. Yeah. He's got a thing about Fight Club, too. And oh, no. He only watched three quarters of Scarface like, man, he's he's he lives an amazing life. Yeah. On his throne. No consequences can touch this guy. You're a watchman. Yeah. Yeah, exactly. Remember when he said I'm not locked in here with you, you're locked in here with me.

Fucking. Yeah, I loved that part. That was the best. So close to losing his wallet chain. It's caught on the garbage. But like he's telling them, I, I just want to offend Susan now. Now it's just I just want to be nails in a chalkboard. Anywho, that's every Floridian. I think we're just describing every Floridian. Florida man. Maybe not your neighborhood. Way less clothing. They got it. Yeah. No shirts, jagged pants, but they cut off. Not short level, but above the knees that that's flops. That's Floridian, man. Yeah, there we go, man. Yeah, so we we get we get we make sure he's comfortable and we get drinks in and come here is kind of like pulls out maybe like a piece of paper or something and just to like look official, like he's taking notes.

And he's like, yeah. So we've heard so many stories, but about what happened to your clan, why they left the mountain. And frankly, I don't believe any of the things that I've heard. I wanted to hear it straight from the actual source. Would you mind letting would you mind telling us what how did you leave the mountain? OK, well, what did you hear? Because it's probably bullshit. It is bullshit. I know that whatever I heard was was complete garbage and not from a stone sunder. That's why it's important that we're talking with you today. Don't skimp on any of the details.

You know what dates are names, right? If you don't have them, don't worry about it, but it'll be very helpful. Well. You're going to make a powerful enemy. I actually know someone and he's creating a very, very detailed timeline, so if you could give names and dates. Incredibly helpful. No. So Largren is just going to throw it out there to be like, listen, what we heard and what we know isn't true. We're hoping you can clear it up. Is that no, no girl. Grimhorn outsmarted the entire stone sunder clan. There it is. Oh, boy. OK, well, he's going to try to stand up once again.

Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh. And he's going to like bang on his throne and like trash is going to shift and kind of tumble over his shoulder. But no one outsmarted us. They can't be smart. Me. No. So look. The only stone sunder in the mountain now, they poisoned her. Like that's why that's it. She's not she's basically dead, probably, and they're just keeping her around as like some kind of credibility. But they didn't. That's fucking no. No, it was a coup, but it was just bloodless. What kind of poison could keep somebody in a state like that? That sounds crazy to me, but I don't know anything about poison.

You know, you must know. I don't I'm not a poison doctor. I just I look you want you want a pointy ear or something like that to get you to just you want like someone. Forget I asked. It's fine. No, I got opinions. I got hold on. It's like fast food discussions or food discussions in any group for DNR. It's like, well, time out. Let's get back on track like every time. It's like I got opinions on this. Like, you know, yeah, we put a quarter in the box. We got to let the song. Yeah. So, yeah, he'll like you'll be like, I just got to you want someone who fights like a bitch.

Which isn't you, obviously know, but if OK, if you're going to take over the whole mountain, there should have been a fight. And all they did was turn everybody against us because they it things hadn't been going well. And the the furnace thing almost fell through and that was blamed. I mean, well, OK, you're going to love this. OK, I know. So I'm here. You see just kind of mere tensing powder keg right now between two dwarves. So some dickhead middle tier clan. Right. They're they're basically they're basically servants. Lucky enough to to to get yes. To get like a carving job, fucked it up and then blamed blamed us for it.

And all we did was test it. And, you know, we tested it with some explosives, but it should have if it were good dwarven craftsmanship, it would have stood up your flimble wolves. Right. Grimble, grimble. Close. Right. So if you guys you guys made something, you stand up to any scrutiny to testing. All we did was test it and it fell through. And then once we got rid of them. They used that as a way to shake everything up. The stone sunders would take it over for too long. We were running things into the ground. We're reckless drunks and just a bunch of bullshit.

And so why, why, why, Grimhorn, why, why did he why did he suddenly turn on you because of that, just because of that? I think it was to get I. I liked I liked them, but I think it was. I think it was just to take over, like I think so they have they were caring for. What's her face, and then all of a sudden she's real sick and then just comified. And then. Wait, hold on, what? And he's going to reach for his drink and then like like he ran out of gas. Halfway through the thought, and he's going to in one gulp, just it streaming down his face into his beard.

And then like the elixir of life, it just regenerated temporary hit points to his brain. And he's going to just continue the thought. I think. They just did it to take over and they did it in a way where they just waited for us to do something that. Was unpopular. Like excessive testing. Was that the unpopular thing or was it something else? Well, that was one of the things I had. Drank. And. That's OK, don't blame yourself, that's that's not you, that's a. That's an addiction. Well. I think. I think they'd been planning it for a while. And I think they just took over and it kind of kept.

Nirvana, whatever her name is, hostage. And yeah, we just we we had to go and we just got outvoted. Every other clan wanted us gone. Wait, are you guys not allowed there? Are you visiting or like what? Well, eventually we'll go there with this, you know, detailed history to sort of set things right and make sure that it's, you know. That people know the people know. You know what I mean? Mm hmm. And you're going to be instrumental in that. Well, OK. What do you. I like. Are we taking it back? Is that what you're saying? Like, we're going to get this out and. We're going to get a stone sunder back on the throne.

Is that like because I've been waiting like they must be shitting themselves without us, like it's got it like the whole backbone is gone. I kind of I kind of look over at Largren when I say this, but I'm like, we are planning on getting a stone sunder back on the throne. Nomara. Largren has been like he's got like a stone in his hands and it's like been working it between this. Like that tension's got to go somewhere and he's like almost working like a groove, like one of the round stones that he uses to carve into. This is a blank one. And he's just like rubbing it really hard.

And he goes. There's a plan to get the truth back out there. And there's a plan to take the throne away from. That one shit, what a grim horn, grim horn away from the grim horns. What else can you tell us if we could change it? What else can you tell us? Is there anybody there who's still sympathetic to your clan? I mean, I think they were strong armed into it. We were friends with a lot of the you know, most clans, like, you know, the the Shatterstones and the Cragborns were pussies, but like most of the other ones were cool. A lot of liquid in his burping, but most of the other ones were cool.

I think it was just a political thing, you know, like sometimes people can't hear the truth and like they can't handle it, you know. If this guy had a podcast, it would be just dude wipes as sponsors and like just off market Viagra like it just those two things under experience. Welcome to the mind dojo. Now, I know that you're this character. I just want you to know I hate this character now. I know that you aren't a bitch and you wouldn't fight with poisons, but do you know, I mean, is there any is there any way to pin it on somebody that we could like point and say that person did this with this kind of poison?

And the more we know about that, the easier it will be to bring justice back to the mountain, even if it's just an inkling, a suspicion you have. I got I got a list. I got I'm sure you do. OK, without God. Half the servers who cut him off. OK, so the only thing really wrong with the crack boards where their work was shit so that that but the shatter stones. Half of them were herbalists, and I think if anybody could if anybody knew how to make a poison that could like incapacitate without killing. Michaela Michaela shatterstone. OK, the shatterstone, are they still in the mountain or are they somewhere else?

Here's the other thing. They didn't even live in the mountain. Most of the time they'd venture out because they needed rare herbs and shit. So like they would they they they would be away half the year and then they'd come back and just jump to their place in line and just bullshit. Hmm. They're basically immigrants. And while we're on the topic. I just I give him my drink. There we go. Look, look. Yeah, I kind of looked at Logran and like just kind of raise an eyebrow like, is there anything else we need to get out of this dude? Logran's having a hard time focusing on Kamira right now.

He's kind of just like staring through this guy while he like, you know, drinks, both drinks. Insult your family lineage. Yeah, sure. Sure, sure, sure. How long you been here in? Bonzo's. What day is it? It's the 12th of all to Orin 1378. It's like 15 years. 15 or years. That's what I'm saying. They got to be like shit in themselves by now. Right. Like everything's got to be falling apart. And right. Yeah. The next generation is too soft without us. And they'll come crying to you. Right. Soon as they screwed up bad enough, they'll come find you. Not a hero. One of us.

Yeah. Why not you? You've been on me. Yeah. You've been taking great care of yourself this whole time. He's going to say the words, but like not he's just parroting them. He's not thinking about like, why not me? He's like, why not me? Like, just. You peak, you peak, you peak, my guy. You've been doing great. You make your ancestors proud. I bet. He's not picking up on any of that sarcasm at all. Like not like it's beyond him. Nuance? Nah, let's get that out of there. There is a point at about this point. So this is a little bit of the hold me back moment. He's he's getting pretty close to like leaning into it.

Get a little tight lift like. Like you're doing that. Yeah. Yeah. Like he's like he's yeah he's he's gripping his his cup now. But like gotcha. Yeah. Taking a single sip out of it type thing. Oh, so come here. Picks up on this. And he's like he's like Eb. He he slowly reaches over to Logran's cup and just like puts a hand on your hand just to like take it out from away from you, you know, just to like and give you like just give you a little like, hey, we're leaving kind of thing. Take the cup and be like, Eb. It's been an absolute pleasure. Here you go. Last drink on us.

You've been more than helpful. You have been amazing. And if we need to fill in any more details, I'm hoping we can find you here. Is that OK? First of all, thank you. It's. I don't get to talk about this stuff enough because no one wants to listen anymore. But like this is this is good. I'm glad someone's going to get the record out. And I'm glad that you came to find me and like not my sister like that means a lot because that stuck up bitch doesn't know anything and never knew nothing. And it's good. This is good. Yeah, I'm glad that I'm glad we found you, too.

We you know, we had heard about your sister and we were going to go see her in. Where was it? Where was it? Lockford. Lockford. We were going to go see her there. But, you know, the opportunity to meet you came up and that made us very excited. Why would you go see the rest when you could see the best? Like, you know, it's just why? So it's been great. And I hope you have a wonderful day. Do you want any help getting back in or are you good out here? Do you need a little fresh air? And I'm on nap. OK. Yep. That sounds good. All right. I just like pull some trash over him.

In a modern setting, Lagrun would take a couple of pictures on his phone. But he does take a moment to kind of just like burn this image into his memory, because despite everything that he heard, this is good for him. And he doesn't say a word. He has to stand up and walk away. Otherwise he will assault somebody. So that is fair. You don't want to do that in this town. Honestly, the public drunkenness is probably not going to be good for him. Yeah. So you're saying if somebody found out about that, I was going to say thank you for covering him up with trash because he'll be dead.

If he gets found out there. Oh God. Yeah. Just a little trash blanket. Yeah, I guess we just walk out. I guess we just walk out the alley. I sort of like turn the log and I'm like, did we get everything we needed to? Are you satisfied? Come here. I'm not going to be satisfied for a long time. But we got what we needed. Now we need to go somewhere else. And I need to drink a lot. I'm right there with you. Let's go. So I guess we'll wait out front for the rest of our group to join us before we go find a not themed bar to drink. What's wrong with bonzos? Ruby, Nythira.

OK, what's the aim now? Because I know you have that medallion. I know the vault was a place you wanted to visit, but there's a lot in between that. And are you like what? Is there anything else on your radar, I guess? A quick conversation with Ruby and then had two bonzos to check in. All right. So Nythira with medallion hand and Vetti running off. Nythira is going to turn to Ruby and go, so besides researching gems or and whatever else is on our list, I have something else in mind to look up. Ruby. Is it? She's going to look confused for a second. Is it? It's about your family tree, right?

Because it's probably stacks and stacks of books to even cover all that. I mean, it is about family. Our family. I'm just going to lay it out for you. I want to look up about Koldath and how we could possibly separate him from Tamira. Before you even got to separate, she had already rolled her eyes like, "Ugh, Koldath." It's like a reflex. It is. It really is. She probably rolled her eyes whenever Koldath was talking to them in the room. Yeah, without knowing. I feel icky. She will roll her eyes. As soon as you bring up Koldath, she is going to have a little reaction like, "Ugh," and then kind of feel a little shock about like, "Oh, oh, you mean, oh, you want to look up how to," and then she's kind of calculating it all in her head.

How would that even work? How could that work? Wait, what he would know if he knew. Oh, well, that's interesting. Yeah. So, Aubrey, before it became a religious police state, even then it was a place where you could research anything religious and the opposite of religious, demons. So they have to have something here, and it's probably, and she holds up the medallion in this vault. So to recall, Ruby, the whole walk around has been completely, you've had to go back and get her because she's just not paying attention, but now she is absolutely present like, "Oh, okay, we got lots to do then.

We got to go." Yeah, I think we should check in first just to see, just so we all know where we're going because they've been there for a while, and then just let them know we're doing some research on the list. I don't want to tell Chimera what we're researching. No, no, no, no. You could never say that to him because as soon as you would tell him that, Kolgoth would know about that. I'll be honest with you, I don't even know that Chimera would ever want to do that, but not terrible to know how. Yeah, and to be clear, I don't want to force this on him, but we both know Kolgoth isn't good for him.

He's terrible. He's the worst. The absolute worst. Literally the worst. But if he ever changes his mind, I want him to have options. Well, you're a good mom, and then she's just going to put her arm around you. The world's greatest. Come on. How would they find out where Bonzo's is? Would they just walk around and ask somebody? Would it be that kind of thing? It ain't hard. So every street is laid out with signs, and it's very orderly, so it would not be hard. It's the biggest chain restaurant in the property. Very popular. You'd probably hear the place. From all the way.

And you would see a very disappointed dwarf standing near it, and a second dwarf you don't recognize. Ruby would actually then, at that point, if she saw Logran, if they came around the corner and saw Logran from a distance, she'd probably prep her wrist ballista just in case there was something going on. She's only thinking about Logran. Right. So she would just simply discreetly... That's the stone sunder. Get him! She would be very calculated. The point is that she's got Logran's back, and she would just be like, "Okay, what's going on here?" until she knew better.

Yeah, and Nythera would subtly have her hand closer to Hidden Daggers. He looks like he's under duress, too. Probably we're standing on the corner, and Logran, since we ended the meeting out in the alley, Logran's been standing there basically just flexing his hands and working his jaw. You ever see somebody just tighten their jaw over and over? And I don't know if Khaymira would be trying to talk him down or whatever. "No, that was good. We got all that information." Yeah, he's doing a lot of these gestures. A lot of aggressive pointing and yelling about that alley back there.

A one-two punch of you having to endure that restaurant and then have some drunk piece of shit call your entire lineage bitches. And let's walk through my personal hell before I meet my worst enemy. Exactly. That was the worst of it, too. It's not the reputation of whatever happened, but the reputation of their shitty craftsmen, too. He's like, "Motherfucker, I will bury you." That's what he's mad about. That's what Khaymira's probably talking him down about right now. There's no way he's just making things up. He's just making it up. There's zero foundation for him.

He is, and it's all just bravado. Look how terrible he's doing, Logran. You've got to take some solace in that. It's goddamn embarrassing to live his whole life thinking he's right. It is every time I read a review or a comment that calls me a piece of shit hack and then Bre's like, "Yeah, but look at them. You can click on their thing and see what else they've done. That's all they rate things." It's like, "No, how dare that motherfucker. You can't do what I do." You want to yell at that person, but it's not the way that works. You will get no satisfaction.

Just got to let them be wrong. But Logran doesn't think that. Logran wants to go strangle them. You can get real easy right now, too. Khaymira just kind of goes, "Well..." Ruby would pick up on whatever is tense, and she would not like to see Logran that way because that means something didn't go right. So she's going to assume something not good is happening. Probably she's wondering if this is the person. She doesn't know. From a distance, it might look like I'm mad at this fourth action. He's probably arguing with you because he couldn't argue with him.

Oh, that's the worst. When you're a sounding board for, "Here's what I should have said." He's just got to go, "Mm-hmm." And it's just like... Exactly. It's like, "I can make fun of my sibling, but if you make fun of my sibling, I'm going to..." Yeah, exactly. I can talk down my own shit constantly, but as soon as he says it... You had such great restraint. That was such a good performance. You did great. You're doing fine. You're doing good. Let it out. We'll go have some fun. I'll settle for a drink. I think we probably approached this like an attack. Ruby and I, so there might be like a pincer.

Like we split off it all. Absolutely. And this has probably happened a thousand times for no reason, but just in case. And this was just par for the course. But Camara is in actual danger right now because right there is a system. Can I roll stealth? Because I want to approach them stealthily. I'm passive perceptions 10. Honestly, we'd cut that in half with how driven he is and how blinders on he is. Oh my god! Wow, yes! Crit. I got a crit. Which makes it a 28. Do you want to roll on the little skill table to see what happens? Like, why not? Roll on the table, you take Camara's hands off.

You kill the stranger dwarf immediately. Just a knife at his throat. Like, oh god. Oh, hey. Quick camouflage. Like it's tough to do in the city, but I almost imagine like the like the Metal Gear Solid 3, like paint yourself like brick almost. Like you're just so like you're just like you're so good at slinking around alleys and stuff like that. Like finding slightly shadowed places and stuff. Yeah. So you do not see that. You got one of the robes from one of the local clergy because speaking of assassins. Assassin's Creed. Exactly. Also probably made better only because Ruby having split off slightly to be on the other side of the road has a little bit more of a...

Oh yeah. I mean, we're just able to walk up in the middle of us basically like Lagram's not arguing with Camara, but he's arguing at Camara. Yeah, 100 percent. And just go, oh, Ruby. Good to see you. This has probably again happened before in some way, shape or form. Oh my god. Thank God. And she'll sort of stand down on her ballista, put everything back. It's me. It's me. Yeah. And then Nightheera pulls back from right behind you. Yeah, Ruby will be like, it's all good. I didn't hear you coming. Of course. Obviously, naturally. So? I've never been so close to just hiring Nightheera.

Ruby will look at Camara and just say, so it went well. We got a lot of good information at the cost of some infuriating ego. That was going to happen no matter what he said. I know. But yes, it went very well. Well, best case scenario, did you punch him? Would I had to pull him out of the trash to do it? He's asleep back there if you want to see him. No, no, thank you. If you want to go punch him, he's a free shot. You're actually going to hear a commotion from the alleyway. Like it sounds violent. Oh, oh, oh, no. Is there a voice involved? Does it sound like him or is it just rustling?

There's a voice. It sounds authoritative and stern. Like it is like you're hearing it because of the the echo of the alley. It's kind of tough to like you hear the words under arrest and then you hear grumbling. And then a tussle. And then repeated blows. And it's what sounds like a dwarf in agony, like he is getting tuned up. So the Heralds of the city have been nicknamed the White Hoods because they actually. That's a bad name. It's a bad name here, but it's because they literally have these hooded cloaks that they wear. They're very easily identifiable.

It's in. They're not pointy. They are rounded, form fitting hoods. Gotcha. We got to work on this. I came up with the name. I knew I would get this pushback and I understand. Maybe we should do some polling and workshop it. We'll workshop it. We'll take it. We'll take it to whatever the Therian equivalent of a Jasper is and we'll we'll we'll we'll get some audience feedback. But anyway, as you can see, these guys are big, covered head to toe and you can't even see their eyes within that. So it's just this booming like these things. Oh, yeah. It's a man in uniform for sure.

But be it, you know, judge me, male, female, whatever. Oh, yeah. Little bit dark. Judge Dredd, you know? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. It goes every way. But as long as it doesn't sound like he was going at the waitress, I don't care. Yeah. Yeah. No, no, no, no. This was that he was being arrested, fought back and then got stumped like these guys. Yeah. Intervening in his bath. It's still even even chimera winces, though. He's like, oh, ah, like this. Like, OK, these guys would be a fight for like you guys, like if you were to challenge one of these guys, they're there. They're whatever they are.

They're. They're otherworldly at this point. There are a lot of it. Yeah. They do not fuck around. And they like the training they undergo. It's rumored that they're not mortal anymore, almost like they they they are. So they don't they're never not this like they they're like, you know, Master Chief or something like they the training that they have been altered in some way. For you to fight back against them is truly stupid, like that. They they will subdue you one way or the other. So, yeah, he probably got he probably stood up, tried to push back or something like that and then just got thumped.

So, yeah. Who is that? Your friend? Yeah, actually feel a lot better now. Looks like you need a drink. Need a couple. Do you guys figure anything out? Let's get up to the room. I don't want to talk on here. Oh, we got a room. We got a room. Got a room. As we as we leave the street, I turned in. I there and go, just how close was I to, you know? Get killed. And you started speaking. Hmm. Good to know. Good to know. Feel my breath on your neck. Night there. Do me a favor. If you ever do do it, surprise me. I don't think there's any other way for her to do it. Like it's just she's rolling 28.

That's not up to you. Guys, I think it's a good time for us to stop for the night. That's awesome. Yeah. So good. And we'll continue our adventures in Aubrey next time. Next week, I guess. Very cool. Don't let me forget that I get an expertise time for the next 24 hours in this city. As if you need it. But yes, that's a good thing. I know anything about Minecraft. That's a big space. That's at least a thousand blocks from here. That's Aubrey, I guess, is the vibe. We could narrow it down like you are very stealthy in Bonzo. Tundra, I think, is cheating. That's a good thing.

It's.