Not a Heist

This transcript is machine-generated and may contain errors in names, terminology, or attribution.

Howdy folks, Jasper here, and welcome back to Frostborn. Before we jump in, just a quick bit of housekeeping. Theriathon is almost here. May 31st, 2025, from noon to midnight Eastern, live on Twitch. It's our 13th anniversary, and we're celebrating with three one-shots. Two new Frostborn casts made up of familiar voices from across the D&R cast, a special guest or two, and a spotlight on resurrection, where the original Group 1 does what they do best, absolute chaos. This episode is brought to you by GM Assistant, basically a second brain for GMs. Jason's using it for Frostborn, and it's genuinely fantastic for staying organized and story-focused.

And thanks to EN Publishing, creators of Level Up Advanced 5th Edition, the deeper, more flexible version of D&D 5e that powers the Frostborn campaign. If you want ad-free episodes, bonus content, early access, behind-the-scenes chaos, full access to resurrection, and even things like the latest Overseer's limited quest, join us on Patreon at patreon.com/dandr. And if you're enjoying the show, a quick rating or comment goes a long way. It seriously helps more people find Dungeons & Randomness. All these links for Theoryathon, our shop, Discord, and more are waiting for you in the episode description.

Now let's head back to Aubrey, where the gang is definitely behaving and not planning anything suspicious. That would just be weird. Take it away, Jason. Oooooooooh, let's do that thing where we go around the table and introduce ourselves up. Jason of the Dungeon Master going around the table, starting with Jameson. Hey, I'm Jameson. I play Lagerin Kragborn, the Dwarven Marshal. And Susan? Hi, I'm Susan. I'm Susan, and I play Nythera Ryle with the Elven Rogue. I lost my voice for a second. I didn't hear that. I thought you forgot your name halfway through saying it.

And I was like, wow, that's crazy. Because Susan just swallowed a bug on camera and like the people in the podcast didn't see that. But it was nuts. She just like called like a fly and it was gone. Yeah. Well, OK, that is where she gets her power. But we try to keep that. She's got a random thing going, you know. Listeners don't need to know that, Ian. Sorry to put you on Front Street. Actually, all people from Florida derive their power from eating in front of a car. There are a lot here. And Ian? Hey, I'm Ian, he/him/any, and I am playing Chimaera, the Tiefling Warlock.

And last and certainly not least, Jasper. Hey, everybody, I'm Jasper. I play Ruby Pettigrew, the half orc gear slinger adept. Aubrey, you're in it so far. So far, it's been I'm so sorry you went to sneeze and I thought you were going. I mean, I did the vampire thing. Maybe there is something to this bug thing. I'd say so far your time in Aubrey has been pretty damn successful. Like you got you got some of the information you needed from a very belligerent drunk. You you got fans. You got you got like that's that does not happen very often when you go to when you go to a city.

So your time here isn't done. I know that there's stuff you want to do. And then there's stuff you might run into along the way because it's a big populated place. So let's let's pick up a few minutes after where we left off, where our dwarven friend was beaten in an alley and taken away. Hopefully, Logran's had a couple of minutes to cool down and you can kind of debrief about what you've what you found in the city. I would say you guys find another bar. I think we're heading to the inn. I think we're going to go to our room. Yeah. Yeah. OK, so we can we could do that.

I there is a quieter bar a few blocks from here, just to let you know. Do we have this is this important is going to influence Logran's decision. Do we have any lecture left from what we bought in in Winter Haven? Well, let's be realistic. Glass bottles add a lot of weight to liquor, and it was a few days there. Few days fixing things up. You had a big party like. I'm OK. I'm going to say if you got any, there's probably like an emergency flask or something like that there. Can I please? I feel like we we got a bottle of the good stuff that we were saving.

And canonically, we've all been dipping into it. Logran could be like, oh, yeah, we'll break out the good stuff. And it's like three quarters of the way already down. Truly, Ruby does have in because she has a lot of pockets and buckles and all sort of thing. She does have a flash that she keeps she keeps stuff in. Sure. If you needed it, if you needed a nip, but I don't know. Well, I mean, here's the thing. Logran wants to drink. If we have stuff on hand, we can go up to the room. If we don't, we're probably going to have to hit a tavern. But then there's the risk of running into people we don't want to run into.

Yeah. Oh, it's Dragon. That's all it is. That's what you're doing. OK, cool. You look at the decompress. You need a few minutes away from people. Let's go up to the room and drink. It's so hot. OK. Well, I. I'm going to make an executive decision. There is a bottle left. Now, this bottle. Is the only one not touched. For this reason, there was a bottle of wine that was kind of kind of found along the way. It's one of those like, oh, these adventures are dead. Wow, this is a good year. Holy shit. Like this is. Wow, this is nice. OK, so you take it in and a certain demon offered to.

Kind of goose it a little bit, it's like, oh, I can improve the quality and like, we can we can bump that alcohol. That's like seven percent alcohol. We can we could do better. Like we can, you know, just to like this is in his mind, it's like, oh, yeah, to get you guys buzzed. Shit. Yeah, that's great. We could do that. Just do that without asking. Yeah, that's come on. Yeah, no, this isn't like, oh, but you have to do something for me. It's like, no, no, no, that's what I live for. I want to feel you get drunk. That'd be great. So we have a bottle of turbo wine.

Yeah, like dire wine, I guess. Yeah, I mean, if it's on the encounter table, we better drink it. So, yeah. Yeah, so if we got if we've got that log, we're going to fish it out of his pack because he's definitely the one carrying and be like, all right, we're going up to the room. We're going to drink this. We're going to talk. OK. Sounds good, boss. As you walk into the inn and you're you're going up the stairs, there's a there's the faintest rumble from next door. But again, there is excellence. There's got to be some kind of spell separating the sound from the inn or no one would sleep.

But like, I imagine it's just like, you know, now what's over there. And I imagine as Logran's walking up the stairs, it's just, you know, he knows what's over there now. So he knows exactly what's causing that sound. Yeah. Ruby Ruby still has no idea. And again, this would be her her most amazing playground. But what was it like over there? Did you go is that where you were? Uh, and kind of look at Khmer. Yeah. Yeah, it was. It was. It certainly was. If we get a chance, I'll take you over there. I think you'll really like it. We'll get nachos. We'll get a couple of drinks.

Do they have when they have like an onion and then they like make it big and you can take it? It's fried. And oh, yes, absolutely. They've got that. Yeah. The exploding onion. Legally distinct. I like it. You've got that four player Simpsons arcade machine. You know the one. That's the dream. Just get successful enough to get a full one of those. Just a big, big version of it. Yeah. And the old cabinet. Yeah. So we'll get into the room and Logran will walk in like he'll just push the door in. He'll walk in, step to the side and immediately start working the cork out of this bottle.

Like uses teeth, you know. I'll take this time too, to like shed this disguise. So that that is gone now. So Khmer is back to tiefling form. I like to imagine that while that is a, it's a natural like thing you can do now because of, you know, it's gotta be a relief to take it off. You know what I mean? Like it's gotta be like when you had to wear a mask in hot weather or something, you're like, like it's not a dire thing to have to wear, but it's like, it is nice to take this off. Holy shit. Like it's like taking off your bra when you get home. Oh God. Exactly.

I imagine. Based on reviews. Yes. I would say it's probably. You know women and it's, it's a relief. I know of them. Yeah. I've heard bad things about bras. Yeah. One of the greatest feelings ever. All right. I'm not about women. I thought that's where you were going. I know of them and I've heard bad things. I tried to steer away, but it was too far. So yeah, Largren's working the cork out of this bottle and he's like, all right, well, we got a whole bunch of information. That's the good news is we got where we're looking to find out sorta. Um, bad news is guys a prick, but we knew that.

Well, he is a stone sander. Exactly. Yeah. Yeah. Ruby will have from wherever, maybe it was already in the room, but she'll just have the glasses ready to go. She'll hand them around. I mean, a bit of head Canon, but I feel like all four of us have like a cup that we just have handy for when a bottle is being entered. Like all four of us. Um, but yeah, he'll, he'll start pouring, pouring the, um, the drinks around everybody. So my fear will take a very small glass cause she still has work to do. It's responsible. We're towards the end of the day, right? Like this is getting closer to the end of the evening.

Right. I'd say between you guys probably like you guys walking around, checking things out, like you got here around like midday ish. It's probably somewhere around three 30 or four. Like it's getting to the point where evening's going to start closing in. And you're not exactly sure what a, what a city like this does with that. Like, are they a little Mormon about it? They close early or like it like, yeah. You're just kind of like, huh? When, when do stores close around here? They closed on Sunday. Like what do we do? Like, you know, Bonzo's is 24 seven.

Oh God, yes. A party like a Bonzo's party. That's why those enchantments are on the walls. Yeah. Um, and I, if you're taking a sip from our glass, cause the criminal element in this town is very lacking, but I was able to get an inside track to the restricted section of the library. She has a fan, a fan, another one. Night there. Uh, she's young. She's young. All over the place. She was cool. I actually really liked her. I think we have a lot in common, but yeah, she was falling in and falling in and falling in and ultimately we got this and then she's going to point at the medallion.

Yeah. She was a cute kid, a little, um, naive, but we got this one like candy too. Yeah. Little hands. Yeah. They're going to creep up on, on chimera shoulder. It sounds like this young lady is a fan of murder. I do know a demon who could help her out if she's bored. No. All right. I'll be here. Just kind of a slink back. And I hear it does what I did. It's point at him very sternly. There is, there's a look that you have given me several times on, on the show and it is stop. Yes. It's like, all right. It just, you just pop what you're doing right now. I'd like to think that like, I'd like to think that like, because Colgoth is a demon, like he's very powerful, more powerful than all of us in this room, but like, he just, just doesn't want to bother with like, I just don't want to even, I'm not, I don't have the energy for this.

After a good time, he doesn't need the three of us being like, no. Yeah. I mean, like it's kind of the wet blanket thing and it's, it's also, it's like, look, I don't know if you've worked out what you can stab, but I don't want to test it. And like, I'm not here for that. What's the medallion for? Oh, I'm sorry. Go ahead. Go ahead. I just wanted to know what it was for. What, what, what, what kind of things is it? A lot of the books in this town, as you can imagine, are under lock and key. This is the key. Oh, well, you said books and I kind of fell asleep, but then you said there are books that people aren't supposed to be looking at.

And now I'm very interested. Well, Ruby and I were given permission to go in and we have a two party system here, so you should probably stay with Logran. Oh, Ruby can go with Logran. I can go with you. It'll be fun. I'm going to give a look to Ruby. Yeah. I mean, Ruby's locking eyes and like, I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. It might be a sneaking situation and I respect your ability, Chimera, but Ruby and I are usually point and sneaking. We may have to get away pretty quickly. And we're supposed to meet up with our friend, the fan, because we didn't tell you this.

Ruby's changing the subject, by the way. By the way, we didn't tell you this. She has friends who are also fans and guess who agreed to meet him? Ruby's going to look down into her drink and take a and finish it. Oh, you're doing a signing? That's incredible. Are you going to wear the mask? Oh, she's better wear the mask. She's going to wear the mask. Oh, there's no way she can't wear the mask. It's going to happen. I'm confused. At what point when I said, keep your noses clean. Did meet murder fans and sneak into a library just become the plan? It's not sneaking.

We have a medallion. That's not. She just said. I said we may have to get out. Why do you what are you going to do there? Hey, we have this list of items we need to find. She's going to pull out that list. And where else are we going to find a leader of vampire blood or 12 boiled werewolf teeth or an orb of chaotic assault? Listen. This may be we may be able to find this information. You got the big plan. We got the little tiny details here. So somebody's got to do some research. He drinks. It feels illegal when you two talk. It just feels illegal. I just I'm going to say it again.

If anything happens, we cannot help you. It's over. We just saw that asshole get beat to death in the alley because he was drunk. OK. All right. That's it. Yeah. All right. We're just going to do some research in the library. There's nothing weird going on. That sounds very legal. I approve. OK. Well, if this is the kind of establishment that closes up at sundown, we probably should head out, Ruby. Well, I mean, we can do it now. I just figured Logger would want to get out of town as soon as possible, not wait another day for us to do research. We can do another day.

We have more work to do here. Well. I thought we were going to leave before the day was over with how you were going. I've been thinking. We're here. We left Frost's shit house. I kind of left him with a lot of work in their laps and I almost feel bad about it, but I figure what we can do is we can go around the mercantile district. We can talk people up because Aubrey doesn't trade with Winterhaven. There's no reason they can't trade with us. We can have. Our fort be the middle ground between those two cities that aren't talking to each other. We got to start getting word out about that now.

So tomorrow, two things. One that two, I think if we're going to go on any long trips to. I don't know, Lockford. Then we might want to find a merchant caravan that's going that way. Offer to offer to guard it, do some work, earn some coin, keep them safe, keep ourselves safe. Rubiel, when you say Lockford, it will be so specifically random that she's going to raise an eyebrow and be like, huh? You very much tried to make it like I'm just thinking of something off the top of my head, but it was too pointed for it to be that. Guys, I was thinking we could walk 400 miles to the east.

How about it? Why Lockford? Well, real quick, Stone Sunder told us a lot of information, some other things we need to look into to put a pin in that. I got to ask you a question right there. But turns out he's a huge asshole and no surprises there. He has a sister who doesn't like him, so I automatically like her more. She's in Lockford. So we got to find her. I think we'll get more information because chances are she'll at least be less drunk than he was. Because damn. - Well, there's a lot of land between here and Lockford. She's been sort of just looking over that list.

Of components for this artifact. She just kind of points at it and just kind of taps it with her finger. She's like, it's got to be at least one of these things on the way. So we got to get moving no matter what, one way or the other. - Well, we can hit Fair Bay on the way. Fair Bay is another place we wanted to go. So I think if we can find a caravan, even to Esterholt. You go Esterholt, Fair Bay, Lockford. - There's a start. - Nadera's gonna clock probably when Chimera reacts to Fair Bay. - Fair Bay, we may not want to go there. It's too big. It's huge. It's full of people.

I don't know what we're looking for there or who. But it's going to be difficult to find anyone. And it's going to take us a lot of time. That's all I'm saying. - Right. But there's money in Fair Bay. Which means I bet we can knock some items off our list here. And there's a stone sunder in Fair Bay. Nevermind the sister of Chucklenuts downstairs. - Well, that's what I mean. If we're trying to find one person, rather than dig through a haystack to find a needle, why not have the needle come to us? We can stay outside of Fair Bay and we can have this stone sunder show up where we are.

And if you need money, I can make money. I can do card readings. I can swindle people. I can do all kinds of things. - As you've been talking, Logrin's eyes have been narrowing. He kind of leans forward. - Because it breaks down to it's like, I can do crime. - He's doing that thing where he's sitting in a chair and he leans forward so that his elbows are resting on his knees and he's got his cup in both hands. And his eyes are just kind of narrowing. He's like, what's in Fair Bay that we don't want to encounter? - You're giving me that look. There's nothing in Fair Bay.

It's just traveling around with the circus. We've been through there before. It's great for drawing crowds. And there's just a lot of people there. It's going to be hard to sift through everything and everyone because that's the place everyone wants to be. That's where all the money is. That's where the weather is warm. That's where people want to go. And it's full. It's chock a block. It's going to take us a lot of time to get through everything unless we make a big statement, unless we're the circus, which I guess we could do. - But Nightheera is going to be looking at her copy of the list, be like, lots of people, lots of possible wealth so we could easily steal from someone a large topaz and a large emerald.

Probably maybe someone has a greater demon horn on display. Sounds like a place we want to go. - Well, I mean, you want a topaz, you want an emerald. We can get that. You don't have to go all the way to Fair Bay to do it. - Ruby's going to say just under her breath, but in a loud way, someone's got some big feelings. Let's leave it alone. - We got to go that way anyway. If we decide to skip Fair Bay, we got time to make that decision. But we go south to Esterholt, maybe there's somebody there we can knock over for those gems. If we're going to go through to Lockford, we either go around Fair Bay or through it.

Right now, through seems like a better idea, but we don't have to make that decision right this minute. Meantime, if there are any problems in any of those cities that the rest of us should know about, we can deal with it. And he kind of - and it's not directed at Chimera. He does like look around the room, but - it's not not directed at Chimera. - And to lessen the tension a little bit, when you like look around the room, it's gonna like shrug, I've killed a lot of people. There's probably a problem in every town. - You gotta say that quieter here, please.

He checks the door. - I don't know, I feel like we could do the library first thing in the morning rather than trying to do something towards the end of the day, potentially. If we're going to do some good research and if it sounds like we're going to stay longer or not immediately leave, I guess is my point. - Yeah, I just thought we were heading out as soon as possible. I didn't know that. - Believe me, I'd like to, but if we rush out tonight or tomorrow morning, we won't be ready for a trip like that. - We could even go through to the Bruegall camp, check in on them.

That might be helpful as well. Swing by there, go down, we could hit Lochfort that way. Always good to check on an alliance, especially as one as tenuous as the Bruegall. - I imagine at this point, like one of us has unrolled a map. - Oh yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. That's why I brought it up. Like it's gonna be, yeah. So there are, I'd like to mention this as, just because it might not have occurred to you, but you're in a major city and some of the items like gemstones and things like that, you could probably get some info on, hey, can you give me, you know, spots on the map where we're most likely to find these things.

So you can get little, like picture them as like little bubbles where it's like, hey, you're probably gonna likely find them here and here and here. So we'll give you options to chart a course. - Yeah. - Who has an extensive collection of exotic goods? And i.e. possibly greater demon horn they have on display. - Give me a list of people with more money than sense. - Yes. - That's the kind of - - Like not everybody in the church, but there are some, like the demon horn thing might be. - Do we want to steal from you? - I know someone we could ask. - We'll get there if we have to.

I'd rather go to the library. - I'd like to think you see the little hands come up and then he's like, all right. - Kalgot doesn't have horns, does he? - Well, I, here's, okay, here's the thing. Because most demons do. Most demons do. Just, you know, it's rude to, you know, correlation doesn't equal causation. It's just like, yes. - The rest of he calls for one and if he's got two, I think if he's going to tag along, he might as well share. That's all. - I would imagine he feels differently, but you could always strike up the conversation. - Oh boy, that negotiation would be rough.

- There's always a deal to be made. - Usually removing a piece of a demon means death. Or a weakening of power and... - Maybe he knows a guy. - Or maybe he knows, yeah. - Maybe he has an enemy he wants us to take care of. - He at least knows the demon he was going to sic on that girl. So it's like, hey, murder's not my thing necessarily, but I know a guy who... - One less murder demon. - He collects vintage pornography. - Like just a weird guy. [Laughter] - So at this point, I think we've got not only a map out, but also the list of components, right? - Oh yeah, for sure.

- So I think we're going down the list and be like, all right, Astor Holt or... I don't have the map in front of me, hang on. Astor Holt or Fairbay might be our best bet for these gems. Adam Antine we'll figure out, maybe you can find out in the library. I have no idea what an orb of chaotic assault is. Maybe that we can find out. Greater demon horde, he just looks at Kamira and shrugs. - I hate to say it, boss, this might be the place to steal that too. I don't, I really don't like that idea. Let's wait and see. I'm not going to say no, I'm going to say almost definitely no.

- In Nythea's head, she's going to say to herself, "You have the opportunity to presence itself." [Laughter] And he just goes down there as a vampire blood dragon breath werewolf teeth. Those should be easy, right? - I think I brought it up before and I am going to look into this in the library, but werewolf teeth, doesn't have to be a living one. - We're going to Lockford, we can just dig one up, right? - Maybe there's a famous werewolf that we could find a corpse of buried somewhere. - Does it have to be a werewolf that's been transformed? Is there a werewolf who's, you know, in their human form?

We just knock out a few molars. Does that count? Does anyone know? - I don't know, we didn't ask when we got the list, I have no idea. - Definitely what you want to do is assault someone who has lycanthropy and just bust their teeth out, like definitely. - I do remember there was a mention though that there are other werecreatures besides werewolves we could use. If we find a wererat, we can just bully it for some teeth. - Ooh, or wereshark. They regrow that shit anyways. [Laughter] - I want you to think regular shark. [Laughter] - Like a nurse shark, you know?

- Yeah. - Oh, oh. - A werenurse shark. - She's like the hundred men versus a gorilla thing. You don't get to pick the men, you gotta take an assortment. You'll get time to prepare, you're not Batman, just fucking fight the gorilla, you know? [Laughter] - Does anyone know what dragon breath is or how to obtain it? - And aren't green dragons very rare? - I don't know, that's true. I wouldn't expect it to not be rare though for what we need. - So green dragons, it would be largely known. They... Every bit of news or stories, they're extinct, they're gone. They died out, you know, centuries and centuries ago.

But it's been rumored that they, you know, some people have seen some dragons that have a remarkably green tint, like that's alarming. And the rumors gained a lot of traction because if a dragon is strong enough to change the weather patterns of a continent, it's not a leap to say they can bring back a dragon species or augment dragon species that like, where does that end, right? - Hmm. - Is it... Can I... I want to ask a question to see if this is actually real, but have the ruins of Uminyiro been picked clean or are they just kind of like the weird wizards that are still living there are still hanging out there and that's it?

- So you are not the first person to think, man, bunch of magical shit to loot. Hell, there have been magic users, there have been bandits, there have been... The area around Uminyiro is a death trap for a couple of reasons. One, it's so... There is a line right from the Hezon Mountains to Uminyiro that is just irradiated with magic. So you'd need some way to be able to get past that. And on top of that, there have been people who have delved into Uminyiro but have not come out because the way the city fell, you'd have to descend into it. And the rumor is it is just a labyrinthine like cubish, like the city fell in on itself.

So every bit of the city that wasn't smashed is still there. So there are buildings, there are hallways there, but like who the hell knows what's in there? If anybody is alive, you could bet that they would probably defend it. - Okay, gotcha, gotcha. Well, I don't know if anyone's gonna like this, but there's also Onakal. We could check the eladrin. - I may have a connection there. One of my grandchildren married into eladrin. I can't remember if it was Onakal or the other ones. - The other ones. - Or Odysseus. - All right. - Most people can't. - Jason, can I make a history check?

And it's okay if it's a long shot. - Yeah, for what? - But looking at the, basically, having spent a lot of time in Aubrey, is there any shot that this city that is so anti-vampire and killed so many vampires would have, sitting around, a big bottle of vampire blood? - A bottle? Give me a history check. - Let's do it. - A big old 750 milliliter. - Just a 40 ounce of vampire blood. - Mad dog, vampire, vampire. - History. Yeah, that's not gonna do it. - No. - That's not gonna do it. - Well, for a six, I can give you a rumor you heard from an unreliable source.

- No, I've met that cousin. That's fine. - He's a podcast. - So he's going down the list again. He's like, all right, gems, animantine, anything of value, we could probably find in one of the Southern cities, I think. And if we can't, then maybe you want to call. If we get through all those places and we don't find those things. The vampire blood, the werewolf teeth is neither or. If we don't find the teeth in Lockford, then maybe we can do, well, there's either Aubrey or Doomhurst for vampires. I really don't want to go to Doomhurst. So I hope we find vampire, werewolf teeth.

We got to find out about that orb library, demon horn. Looks at Khmer again. - Pin in that. - And then for green dragon breath, listen, and he starts to trace his finger on the map. So for those of you who don't have the visual aid, because you're listening to a podcast, he traces his finger from Aubrey, the path down South to Esterholt, across to the East to Fair Bay and Lockford, and then back up to Brightport. This is the closest anybody gets to the dragons. This is where a lot of the wizards went. As far as I know, maybe our best shot at the dragon breath.

We got to go there anyway, because this is our lead on finding somebody who can build this damn thing. And then he looks to Khmer again, then, and he draws a line across to the Brugal camp. That's when we check in. That's when we ask our favor. - Gotcha. - That, for anybody counting, is a very long walk. - Yes. - It's a journey. - That is definitely a... - Almost like a whole arc. - Yeah. - Arc worth of stuff. - Yeah. - Look at the line he drew. - It very much looks like an arc. - Yeah. - So rough estimate, you're looking at probably 650 miles total of... - Easy.

- Ah, depending on what routes you take. - Yeah. - So... - Well, you know what you should also check out while you're in the library, sneaking around. See if there's any information about portals as well. There used to be some here in these lands. Don't know if they're still active, don't know what's up with them, but if we find them, they could be very useful. - Jason. - Mm-hmm? - Nyphira was very active in the Evergreen. Probably helped the White Ravens during the war because anything Carter, she was like, fuck that guy. - Sure. - So... - Especially right around a third of the forest burned down.

Yeah, sure. - Yeah. - No, I get that. Yeah, yeah, yeah. - So she may know about that gate in the Evergreen. - I think, give me a history check. I think this would be like, how Forrest Gump are we gonna do this? Like how, 'cause like you've had a century to like be, you know what I mean? So let's do it. That is not a far stretch. - Jesus Christ. - Yes, yes, yes. - Chris. - You tell me, I don't fucking know. - She lived in a portal for a few years. - She used it to get the groceries. - Yes. - I mean, she probably like, everyone does some dirty things in war, even how clean they are.

So White Ravens maybe had some dealings with her just for like information. So she was like the part no one wanted to talk about that was happening during the Xanden War, but they still needed information about like where to get weapons. Okay, maybe some poison antidotes. So she probably met them in the White Raven headquarters at some point and saw the gate there. - Here's the thing. There's obviously, group one is heavily like featured in that, but there are a hundred different parties doing things. It's a whole war, right? There are tens of thousands of people on both sides.

So it's definitely not a stretch. Also, you would know eventually that that gate does get powered up. And I think with the 20, I can give you some skinny on that if you'd like. - And it's in the Evergreen and she spent the last hundred years in the Evergreen. - Yes. So the gates did get powered up. And even though they're largely secret, you know, people in the know and have to make a big journey like you guys know that there are, there's a fast travel way to do that. A lot of people are untrusting of it. A lot of regular people. It's tough to get a farmer to like sign up for like, and you travel here and you just get taken apart and boom.

It's like, yeah. So it's obviously mostly adventures did. After the long roar, it started having an effect on those gates. There's a bit of magical tomfoolery going on. So the desired gate you are after, you may not be zapped to, you may be zapped to another one or, and this is a worst case scenario, you may come out in pieces. Very rare. It only happened one time, but it was enough for people to go, I don't know. You have to weigh your pros and cons because if the objective was to cross the divide, it might be a good idea to start weighing out. You know what I mean?

Start doing math. But if you have a relatively safe but long journey, then it might not be worth it. But it is an option. So Nigeria is going to refill her glass to the brim now because she's not going out tonight so she could drink as much as you want. I'm just going to say that, Chimera, this is one area that I may have a little bit more information than you. I highly doubt it, but please go on. In the Evergreen, there is a gate and that's what they call them. These portals that connect to other portions of the world and it was heavily used for many years.

Since the long roar though, magic's gotten weird. And the portals, the gates have gotten unreliable. People generally only use them if the need is very high. There's one guy who used it came out in pieces. There's a table. It's almost like you have to leave it up to chance when using them. It's real dumb. Do you want to roll on that crit table to see what historical cool thing? Yes. Five. Five. Oh wow. Read that. Give it to him. Ancestral lines. You trace a person's lineage back through time and find important connections. You uncover something important or potentially scandalous in the family tree of a person you are familiar with.

So I guess it'd have to be someone tied to the gates because that's what I'm thinking about. Yeah, or at least the Evergreen. Yeah. You want to put that in your pocket? Yeah. [Laughter] It's just something that occurs to me while I'm saying this out loud. It's like, "Oh, that has nothing to do with this, but I have gossip." Like just later. Now that I've been drinking. Let me tell you about this messy bitch. And just... Elf gossip's got to be awesome, man. You get a century's worth of shit on somebody. Man. I wonder if it gets worse the older you get. Like if you're 126 and it's like, remember that thing you did in third grade?

It's like, "Man, fuck." Like does the shame, the cringiness get worse? I hope not. I would like to think that you would be like, "Ah, whatever." The more though. Maybe. Yeah. So then that would mean in relativity, because it's so insignificant, those things that we normally gossip about, anything that we do gossip about has to be so horrendous. Got to be monumental. Yeah. Elf cringes. Real cringe. This guy started in a site. Yeah. It'd have to be something like earth shattering. Like, you know what I mean? Like, look, it wasn't the dragon that burned down the forest.

It was a gender reveal party. We don't tell anybody that though, because you know what I mean? Like it had to be something that big. We're like... We told everyone it was a dragon. And that boy didn't grow into anything special. He's just like, runs the grocery store. No! He's had the same job for 58 years. Like just... (laughter) Well, it's an option. The gates. And I do know their location. So if it ever comes to it. If we have to travel far quickly, that's something we can do. And, you know, a guy may have flown into pieces, but did he have a pact with a demon?

I don't know. Look, the more puzzle pieces we have... I'd watch out for your pieces. He just gestures. Come here. Just gestures to the shadowy hand on his shoulder. Listen, the more puzzle pieces we have for all of this, the better off we'll be, right? So let's go get some, you know, tomorrow. We'll go to the library. We'll figure out as much as we can, and we'll figure out what we can do. And we can find out some merchants or something. That's a great idea. That's perfect. And while we're looking up the harder to look up items in the library, you guys just get general information on who's rich and who possibly has large gems.

Lots of big gems here. So... You got any rich friends? Actually, do I? Can I roll on that? [Laughter] I mean... You want to steal from him? You know what? Yeah, let's... Here's... I'm not gonna steal from the Kragborn, but if there's somebody else... Oh, you just know... You want to know if you know any rich people? Do I know any rich people who would have something like that? Because shit, I would have led with that. Give me history. I feel like you would have led with that, but like it'd have to be high, but... Yeah, maybe on the off chance, it's like, now that I'm here, holy shit.

Wow. Now that you've had enough booze... He's in the middle of taking a sip, he's like, wait a minute, holy shit. Topaz McGillicuddy, he's full covered in Topaz. Got his teeth replaced. Too bad it's not Topaz McDemonhorn. Topaz McEmerald Nuts. [Laughter] Clickety clacking all over town. Thinks he's better than me. He might have a point, that's pretty rad. It's a big flex actually. Yeah, side note, did you know emeralds are more rare than diamonds? Oh yeah. They're actually one of the more rare gemstones. Yeah. Minecraft, they're the rarest one. Are they? From my kid, yeah.

Hey. Because he found one and lost his fucking mind, yeah. [Laughter] You can pretend to be a soldier. That's a core memory for him. Trade that for eight different crypto coins probably or NFTs or something. No son of mine. I invested in double doge, father. And then, you know, you get to retire. Sips and strangle. [Laughter] So yeah, that was in that 20 on the who do I know who is rich and expendable. OK, do you know what a fantastic business to open in a city with the tightest security is? A high end jewelry store. And there's a guy named G'nor. G'nor's Galore.

It is epically tight security, but he's got like, you know, like uncut gems, something like that, where you have to get buzzed in through three doors and then you can look like it's like that, like bracelets coated and whatever. And they have raw gemstones there to make you custom things. It is an option. It is a dangerous option, but G'nor. I'm going to think about it. So do you bring it up to the group? Yeah. OK. He's like he's like literally like making thinking faces in front of the whole group for like a full five minutes. You stopped drinking, Logran.

That doesn't happen. Mid drink. What's up? All right. Before I say anything else, I'm not planning a heist. And he looks at all four of them, like in all three of them, not smiling, just smiling. Ruby puts down whatever she was, whatever tools she was using. No. There's a jewelry store in G'nor. Was it G'nor Galore? Was that was G'nor Galore? I don't like saying it. Can I tell you, I made the name that just so you'd have to say it. And I just think it's everything I ever wanted. I like that I can have these small effects on this shared world that we have. Very high security, very bad idea.

Almost guaranteed he has the gems that we need. Let's put some thought into it. Maybe instead of knocking the place over, we can find a way to make a deal. I don't know. I don't know what that looks like yet. Just thinking. While you're at the library, me and Kamara will go shopping. We'll take a look. If it does become a heist, do not do that without us. We're not doing a heist. No, no, no, no. One extra no to call God. And you tell your friend no. I have heard this exact conversation and it goes, we are not buying Warhammer today. And then it's like, no, we're not.

But if we were to. Yeah, if we were to. Just check the site real quick. Yeah. If you were to assemble a crew, who would be great for a heist? We're not doing hypotheticals right now. No, no, no, no. He's drinking. No, no, no. All right. Something to think about. Something to think about. And if there I have a question for you. Shoot. One of the things the drunk asshole told us. Is that. Namera Stonecinder was definitely poisoned. Drunk asshole, take it with a grain of salt. He thinks that. Oh shit, what was the other clan's name? I'm still. Shatterstone? Was it Shatterstone?

Yeah, the Shatterstone. Grimhorn. He thinks that the Grimhorns have been slowly poisoning her for years. And he gave us a name of this woman named Shatterstone. Who he thinks provided whatever it was that they used. But either you or your book have any information. If we can't figure it out, we might have to find this woman. OK, I've been doing research every night, so. Well, I'll look specifically for something that could keep someone in a coma. OK, so terrified to ask for a role. Do you want to roll on the crit table, Logger? Yes, that's right. OK, I was just a D6.

Let's see what hot sauce you get. Chat, yeah. Oh shit. Three. Three. Oh, tell the people what you've won. Well, some study specific periods of history. You study a little bit of everything. You gain an expertise die in a history skills specialty relevant to the topic for the next 24 hours. Shit. So I am going to be thinking a lot about jewel heists. Now I can't stop thinking about it. You come in, you come in on him and he's drawn a map of the building. No, it's nothing. Never mind. Are those all the entrances and exits? No, I don't have the guards work schedules in rotation.

I'd watch Loggrins 4. Just reluctant planning a heist the whole time just that I can't stop myself. Of all the places to do a heist. I know. I know. Wow. That's why it's such a good location for it's like, yeah, yeah. Please try to steal, please. Now, maybe we don't steal, but maybe if we had something of equal value or that was perceived to be of equal value, it's worth thinking about. Oh, I think, sorry, the necklace that Ruby just got is very excited about is worth 7,000. You, you, okay. So no, no, no, I was just thinking about expensive things. But we also have a bunch of expensive potions too.

Oh, that's true. True. While all of this conversation has been taking place, you know, Ruby's Ruby is multitasker like extraordinaire. So whatever she's working on her boots, she's been working on her gloves, she's been working on whatever she can manage while all of this is going down. And at some point she is working on her gloves and she'll at least, at least tonight there, just whoever happens to be looking at some point, she'll be like, check it out. And she's going to lift up her gloves. These are, remember, they're fingerless gloves. They've got like brass bits all over the leather and all sorts of things going over her knuckles.

And she will have somehow taken those teeth from the necklace and she will have embedded them right over her knuckles just, or before her knuckles. So now that they, now they are part of her gloves in such a way that they've been, I don't want to say like, you know, welded to them. I mean, that's not possible, but, but somehow fastened in some sort of very, very intricate way. Let's put it that way. So normally that's not how it works, but I think we'll just say, no, no, no. I think we'll just say now your gloves gain that, you know what I mean? Instead of, you know what I mean?

I'm fine with that. Flavor that with a lot of ruby flavor here. I'm on board. That does mean that necklace is now useless and worthless, not useless, but worthless. So as a necklace. Right, right, right, right. Oh, okay. Yeah. You've destroyed the magic. Yeah. That's how it works in D and D. I don't, I think that's silly, but yes, no, I, I, yeah. You cannot sell it as the necklace of when, you know. She could sell it as the gloves of the, but I don't think she would ever want to do that. Yeah. Doesn't have to be anything of real value. Yeah. We could always pretend it's of real value.

You've conned us that way before. Sounds like a heist. Not a heist. It's not a heist. It's a transaction. Legal. So jumping, jumping ahead to long rest. I did a little digging and there are some misinterpretations of the rules for sleep and those who need it and don't. Uh, cause it was eaten at me. I just had to, I just had to look into it. So a lot of these things like, Oh, I'm going to whittle for four hours. And that's my, you know, a lot of that stuff can be used once per week in a Haven, that type of thing. I'll send you the thing. But the basic thing is it's, it's a bit more restrictive than every night, but it's still a cool thing to be able to do in say dungeons or well, dungeons aren't a Haven.

You know what I mean? I'll send you the thing. I'll uh, yeah, just to prove I'm not making it up, but yeah. I know my trance stands. Yes, I know elves, elves are elves. Like what are you going to do? You know? And there are some things that are extenuating circumstances to it, but yeah, it's in the 57 books that have been published for A5E so far, there have been slight updates to it because I'm not the only one who was like, what the fuck? Like no one sleeps anymore. I want that power, but yes, we'll get into it. As long as it's canon that Ruby sleeps way more than she should and snores terribly.

I'm okay. Yes. Obviously you're fine. You're in a rented room. Everything's nice. It's the safe that you could leave your door open all night. Everything's fine. So, uh, I imagine you got, well, I imagine you, you guys get some sleep. You wake up the next day. What's the battle plan? What are we doing? It is the 13th of Ulta Orn. If you're, if you know, you're out there and curious. I think we're going to have to go ahead and bite the bullet and take Ruby over to the, to the, the theme restaurant for breakfast. Oh God. Yes. What a terrible way to wake up in a bad mood.

Cause he knows he's going to offer. It's like, uh, all right, get dressed. We're going to the place. You'll love it. This is okay. I cannot like, okay. This is to Ruby. What a, what a bar to an eighties guy called titties and cocaine would be like, this is so your thing that it's like, wow, this is, this is great. Like bunch ticking clocks and stuff. And you know, there's just like, yeah, no cocaine. No, no, no, no, thanks. But yes, I mean, if there's stuff to look at it, I mean, like it's like the hard rock cafe of, of right for her brain, right? She would, if, if logger and suggested that that was possible, she would be dressed in no time and ready to go way before everybody else was.

Can I, can I just meet you there? I can go get a table. Can you just wait like five minutes to five minutes? I don't know if I can. It was rhetorical question, but I accept that as an answer. All right. He just like pulls on whatever he has and he held, he'll like, I'm coming with you. Let's go. What do you do down there? This is bliss for her. This is a dad and a Chuck E Cheese is what this is. Yeah. So they do have a breakfast menu here, right? Cause it is 24 seven and yeah, but all the breakfast items are real man versus food shit. Yeah. You know what I mean?

Like French toast sticks drenched in our own syrup sauce that it, you know what I mean? That kind of shit. Like, I mean, just like basically as soon as long as I, all right, let's go. We'll meet you down there. Scene cuts to immediately she's like dipping in like French toast sticks in design. She's wearing like a seemed hat or something. That's where you dip it in. Is that the dominant French tester around the ground? Fucking train going around it or something like there's something crazy. There's so it's, it's, it's, it's so miserable for someone like a dad or a mom taking their kid.

It's like, can I just get a coffee? Oh, you'll get a coffee. Like it's just, it's like, Jesus, I just want just to, it's like, we don't have that. We have the coffee. Like it's all caps. Like they just come out and blow grounds in your face or something. Nice here as she steps through with chimera a few minutes later and is assaulted, but just like her she's assaulted basically is to stop and then look over to come here and go, why didn't you warn me? It's good, right? She's gonna pinch the bridge of her nose and just like walk in the direction of the log around and movies are waving and having to move plates so that you'll have a space in front of wherever you're going to sit because she's already had, she's already ordered so much.

Yeah. Kybira's brought over like they're like huge Mason jars full of mimosas with like cake and chicken and waffles stacked on top of like a straw through it. He just like brings like four of those over and sets them down. You get to keep the glass. That's the, uh, that's all right then. All right. I can deal with that. It dumps it all in. The only thing you don't want to do is disrespect the staff because you're like, they man value. There's probably a look exchanged between Logran and night era that is full of understanding and equal hatred. And like, what the hell are we doing here?

It's for Ruby. We both understand that, but let's get out of here as soon as we can. All of that's conveyed in a look. Yeah. There's, there's definitely a look of, there is a timer on my patience for this and it's already like, I'm stressing it as far as I can because look at how good a time she's having. She uses burning. I think Ruby would also be very familiar with that. And it's at some point without you saying anything, she'd be like, I'm hurrying, I'm hurrying, I'm hurrying. Just every once in a while she'd be like, I'm sorry. No, it makes the dad in me feel bad because it's like, shit, I shouldn't have been projecting that, but yeah.

Night there is like scraping the foam off of her coffee. She ordered. She's like, no, it's fine. That's the best part. Night era. What are you doing? That's the film that makes your tongue numb. It's got the pop box in it. I like to imagine just one more thing for flavor that chimera gets a buzz off this place because of all the excess and the overdoing it. And like, Calgots in heaven, like it's not like it is a type of gluttony and like overdoing it and loud and just like, so even you getting annoyed by this, it's like, oh, like it's like, yes, like it's the experience of it.

Like he's just kind of like, you know what I mean? Like it's, it's like wireless charging. Like he's just like, oh yeah, that's the stuff. Yeah. Yeah. Chimera is trying to take care of you even when you can't come out here in Aubrey trying to take care of you. Uh, one thing that Logger and does while they're waiting, cause he does want to like, not just sit there and stare at Ruby until she's done. But, um, he, he actually leans over to either night there or camera or both. And he's like, is this all right? Like the way is the wig. All right. Like can we fix it up?

Make sure. Cause he like rushed down here. So he's like getting touched up. Am I generic enough? Am I memorable in any way? No, you, you're completely forgettable. You look great. Perfect. Thank you. But your hair is, and she's going to like pull your wig forward a little bit. So it's like covering up your hairline that was showing. There you go. Yeah. All right. That's my best wig. It's good. It's good. Better than this coffee. She looks down with a little bit of foam that's still left on it. There's somehow always a bit more foam, even if you just keep sk- it's like, yeah, it's just like an iceberg.

Your phone came off here. You can have some of mine and just like super foam. Ruby will be, you know, again, not, she's not trying to make you longer and feel bad, but she just, she's aware. She's like, I know I'm going, I'm going. I'm almost done. She's got powdered sugar everywhere. And from all I can probably describe it as is probably some sort of like creme brulee type custard of some sort. And she's just like almost done. Okay. Okay. Okay. I'm done. I'm done. I'm done. She's drinking whatever coffee she's trying to hurry it up. And she knows that they got to go to the library.

So she's just, she's. Mike Darrow will hand you a handkerchief. Thank you. Thank you. Okay. Well, that was amazing. I wish that I had been here last night because I bet it is something else in the evening. But this will do. I guess we got library stuff to do. We got some high stand or something. Oh, she'll zip her mouth. She zips her mouth. She's like, sorry. Sorry. That thing where he like looks around to see who heard that. No one is the answer. Yes. But he's still, he's like, no, you're going to the library. We're going to the market. That's it. That is it. That's it.

Well, except for one other thing. And that's, you got to meet your friend. I don't want to miss that. I think we should all go. No. Yes. Logger, we'll find you later. Either you're coming up to the room and staying by yourself or you're coming with us. It's going to be fun. Her name's Betty. She's so sweet. We'll see. I don't know. I don't think anybody should be off on their own. So you all stay behind. That's you being off on your own. I will go with Betty. Well, all right. We got work to do before we do visits and signings. So he's like, waves his hands, like, get up, let's go.

Let's pay the bill. Ruby, Ruby, don't forget to get your free t-shirt for finishing the breakfast bonanza. She, she, she looks confused and then she points down and she actually already has it. You've got it on. Oh, great. Yeah. Yeah. Looks good on you. Yeah. There's only one of these. Yeah. There's only one of these, but it's like Aubrey. Like it's the, it's a real hard rock thing of like, oh, we will open more of these some somewhere, but like all of the, all of the stuff you ordered had this mining theme because, you know, back in the day, Aubrey used to have like active mines and they were, they were buried at one point, but the reason they stopped mining was vampires.

So like, it's kind of like a, Ooh, you know. But yeah, they used to mine like orange gemstones and stuff. Oh, interesting. Wait a minute. Is that a business taking advantage of a location's history while ignoring the dark parts of it? Wow. Yes. Yes. That never happens in Boston. Or the south. Oh, the state of Virginia was founded some years past and then we, anyway. All right. So let's get, let's get out of here. I want to get out of here please. Let's go. So again, we got two groups. Mm-hmm. Susan Jamison, give me a D 20. Nothing on the line. Except our dignity. 18.

Whoa. 16. You guys got hot hands tonight. That's going to make the combat I have planned terrible. In Aubrey? Oh no. No, no, no. I'm joking. Unless you guys do a heist. What if, oh, I just had an idea, but I don't want to say it out of character. So nevermind. Go. Oh, okay. Okay. Well, we're gonna, we're gonna start with Logran and Chimera. Walk me through it. Where do you guys want to go here? You're going shopping. Yeah. So we probably don't have to play by play all of it, but basically the gist is there's three things. And in addition to any actual like supplies we need to get, but there's three, three goals that Larkin has.

One is case this place, the jewelry store, which I've already forgotten the name of. Jewelry store. Yeah. The galore, whatever. Get in the horse galore. Yeah. She's all right. I liked it by forgetting it. You were penalized by hearing it multiple times. Yeah. My goal was to get it into my ears multiple times in a row. Anyway. So we're going to case that place not for a heist, and then we're going to. We want to go around to all the different market stalls or stores or whatever it is here. And basically pitch the idea of, Hey, you guys can't trade with Winterhaven because these cities have beef, but what if you traded with an outpost just outside of Winterhaven and you get access to that market again, essentially is the pitch.

I don't feel like it's a tough pitch, but you tell me like what the reaction to that would be in general, or we can go through it. Well, it's okay. Give me okay. Here's the thing. Give me a persuasion check and then I'll tell you what the pros and cons of that are and how well you pitched it. Camaro is probably helping. Yeah. I was going to say, can I assist Camaro in that? Because I think that he, I mean, this is Camaro's wheelhouse and Lagren would let him. His thing, right? Yeah. Persuasion is actually not my thing. Oh, really? Okay. Yeah. Oh, so if it's honest, we can't have you do it.

Got it. Okay. Do you want to assist me then? Yes. Yes, I do. Perfect. All right. So, I'm just rolling it and we'll see. Yeah. All right. 16, 17. 17. Yeah. Shit. Wow. Hell yeah. Your modifier is great. Yeah. I got a plus four and then my lessons of war gives me a plus one because he's helping me in addition to the 1D4. So, it's good. Nice. Yeah. So, you - okay. So, here's the pros and cons. Obviously, the pro is they're in a very secure city, right? They know they're not going to get robbed. They know that their stalls are relatively safe. It does mean, as a con, new business is they have to rely on travelers, which I mean, there are travelers, but it's not like the old days where people just come in all the time.

So, getting new business and clientele could be a potentially big windfall for them. It's - your fort's not that far away, which is a good thing, right? It's like 35, 35 miles away, somewhere there through the ice and snow. That's a bit of a hike, but if you're telling them we have multiple people there and we're growing more and, you know, like you're evaluating it at a slightly higher level, then it is with that persuasion. You know what I mean? It's like, oh yeah, we've got blacksmiths and stuff. We got - so, not only will they be able to sell goods, but they could pick goods up for a portion of the cost.

Yeah, because the idea is that Winterhaven is trading with us too, which we haven't worked out yet, but that's the goal and then they will be able to get goods from Winterhaven through the fort. An intermediary. Yeah, exactly. They don't even know we're not trading with Winterhaven yet. They don't need to know that part. Yeah, well, here's the thing. Some of the citizens wouldn't care. Like they're running a store. They know that they can't trade with Winterhaven, so if they know that they can get those things as though they were trading through Winterhaven, then fine, you know.

It's like, OK, it's like being told you're running a podcast, but you can only pick one platform to upload to. It's got to be Spotify or iTunes or Google or something like that. You can't do all of them, which is like, oh shit, OK. Like it would be nice to be able to get all of that stuff. So they're not going to keep it on the down low, but they're definitely not worried about the fact that, you know. So you got a few, few different vendors who are interested, but their main concern is leaving, leaving their shops, right? Do they not trade with anybody?

Because we dealt with a traveling trader literally on the way here with the Mask merchant, right? So I assume they were like traveling to maybe even Stonesunder, but certainly to like Esterholt, right? Or Overdale or something. - So usually what people do is they hire someone to do that. That lovely woman is running her own business and just doing it. Like it's like, hey, I'm cutting out the middleman and I'm just traveling from town to town. But when you have lots of goods, you load up a wagon and then you send somebody out. Usually there's someone that works for multiple vendors.

They give you the name of somebody, Raffin. - Raffin. - And Raffin, Raffin has a slight problem in that every time he leaves the city or comes into the city, a chunk of his time is taken out while they go through all the goods to make sure everything's legal. You're not breaking in contraband, right? It would be super easy. So Raffin is essentially looking for somebody to help him get around that or cut that time down or something. And if not that, then make it more worth his while. Is there a way to make more money going out and doing these runs without smuggling in contraband because they'll kill him.

But you know. - That's less worth it actually. - That's less worth it, yes. - Yeah. Okay. Well, that's not a bad get because we can also talk to this Raffin guy about the second item on our list, which is finding a trade caravan that's going to be leaving south. Right? - Mm-hmm. - Okay. So generally it's, oh man, that would be nice if only we could make it work type deal. That seems to be what the reaction is for most people. - I think they're gung ho for it. They're like, hey, if Raffin makes more money and it's more worth it for him, we're going to make more money and you guys get to build up your trading post and you know that everybody wins here.

I'm game. Let's do it. Like that's basically. And the more, once you get that first card to tumble over, you got two or three vendors who are like, yeah, shit. So you got fur trappers, you have, you know, blacksmiths and things like that who are just like, hey, I have ready-made stuff, but people don't buy a lot of swords and armor in town. I end up making custom decorative pieces and stuff because you know, carrying a sword in the city isn't, you know, they'll keep an extra eye on you basically. Okay. It's not illegal. It's just like, okay. - Yeah. But why do you have that?

Yeah. Okay. Yeah. So I think that, man, I guess it would just be responsible to go to the jeweler with the same offer, right? - Well, we will be playing that one out. - Okay. If we spend a couple of hours in the morning, we'll start with this conversation with as many merchants as we can. - Sure. - And then we'll, you know, maybe after we cut over to the other guys, but we'll do raffin and then we'll do the jewelry store. - Okay. Got to mentally prepare for it. - I got to work my way up. I mean, we can do it now too. - You understand. But I was thinking this would take a couple of hours.

So I just didn't want to jump too far. - Oh yeah, yeah, yeah. No, no, no, no. I'm letting you know that I'm the NPC, Ganor. It's going to be excruciating for you. I just want you to know. And it's not because it's you. You just happen to be the one going to do this, but just because it is you, it is going to be excruciating. I just, yeah. - Okay, fair. - Okay. Just, but I love you. I'm not doing this to hurt you. - All right, it's for my own good. I'll be strong. - It'll make you... Well, let's cut over to Ruby and Nithyra. So you're making your way much more toward the center of the city.

Vast library. Now you do the big like New York library, like the one that's in Ghostbusters and shit. Like it's cavernous, it's massive, right? And there are all kinds of rooms and stuff that you'd be lucky to find one other person in, right? But where you're going, there are multiple entrances. And that basically, that talisman there gets you into one of those. So you'd probably have to look for an entrance that no one's around. They don't guard them because you can only get in with one of those. - Can I get, before we even go forward, I need perception.

I need a perception check from one of you. - I think Ruby's is better. - Yeah. - I'll assist Ruby. - Okay, sounds good. Roll perception check. 22. - Nice. - Very nice, very nice. So there is one note. You are going to notice someone use one of those to go into the stacks, the back forbidden stuff. And you're going to watch them insert this into a slot on the wall and turn it. That door is going to go transparent. And you're going to notice that that talisman kind of gets pinged. So that they do know someone is in there, right? And then take it out, go in, door goes opaque again.

So it's not 100% anonymous. - Yeah, yeah. So yeah, Ruby will point that out, right? She'll be like, let's watch, let's see how this works. And I don't know, I guess they're just going to sort of whisper about it, just sort of figure out what to do next. I mean, it's not illegal to borrow somebody's thing if they gave it to you, right? I mean, it's not like we're doing something wrong. Ruby's nervous. She's like freaked out about this place because she was probably going to try to steal something if, you know, just instinctively. - I mean, that girl that he uses it all the time.

- I mean, and that is our friend. And believe me, she'd vouch for you if not both of us. - As long as we don't take anything from, I think I heard them call it the stacks, we won't be getting our friend in trouble. - Okay, well, I don't want to get in trouble. I don't want you in trouble. I don't want Betty in trouble. All right, are we heading in or where do we go even? She's looking around at this place. This is not normally where she goes. This is not her place. - I'm pretty sure there's like placards or something to find where. - So this is the quote unquote forbidden knowledge, just forbidden to the general public, right?

Because it's so vast, it's not like this everything's under lock and key because people would want to go look. If you're looking for something specific, it's probably something that could be hurtful. It's like Googling, it's like, hey, how do you make a bomb? Like, it's like, why do you want to know that? Like, you know, that type of thing. So you've got like demonology and metallurgy and family histories and stuff like that. So you have Aubrey history. So like, here's what we're going to do. Let's do it like this. You know that the longer you're here, the more attention it draws, right?

It's like, why have those guys been in there for four hours? Like, you know, it's one of those, you know, so you kind of want to get in, kind of get the information, get out. - And we're probably not looking up all the information in there too, because we like, we could probably find some mention to Orb of Chaotic Assault or something out in the general library, specifically in the restricted section, it would be kulgoth and demons. - Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. So like, if it's so like, they would probably have the information segmented, right? If they could like take a biography or something like that, it's like, okay, this bit goes in the forbidden, but the rest of it.

So it's like, hey, what is an Orb of Chaotic Assault? Where were that? Where's that made? Blah, blah, blah. And then once you get to the point where it's, how do I get one? It's like, and we're going back to the, you know, that type of thing. It's the bomb thing again. - Right. Yeah. What is a bomb? - Easy. - Sure. - How do you make a bomb? - Oh, today. - Well, come with me. - Right. - Yeah, I mean, looking at this list, I think there's just general stuff around like topazes and emeralds and, you know, even just the idea that there needs to be a lot of gold. It's boring and maybe obvious stuff, but just doing a little bit of like homework, maybe circling some stuff on a map, just like, this is kind of where things are probably going to be found, would just be good to know, right?

- Right. Like where has Adamantine ore been mined before or who's known to have it? - Mm-hmm. - I'll make this offer. Would you like an updated map notated for everything on that list with the likelihood of finding it on the map on the continent? - Yeah. - Yeah. - Okay. - Hell yeah. - Then I will do that. It'll be ready for, it'll probably be ready by Tuesday. So I'll just hand it over. - Damn. - Give it to those listeners too. - That's perfect. - Yay. - Okay, great. - That's who we're doing it for. - Well, that's nice. - And then there's... - You're the real heroes.

- And then there's the other stuff. Then there's like the green dragon breath, orb of chaotic assault, a little bit more of that detail, greater demon horn. I feel like we're getting into medallion opening a door territory. - Yeah. - Definitely, yeah. Demons specifically, yeah. - Mm-hmm. - Aubrey's pretty much of the notion that one of the reasons things got so bad was because people who shouldn't have been trusted with that kind of knowledge had free use of it. And they didn't tear out the how to make a bomb part. They just had it all in a book and yeah, it led to what they thought was the downfall of their city for a while.

- So we're going into the stacks I hear. - Mm-hmm. - I think so. I think it's probably, I mean, the greater demon horn is kind of the, probably the biggest specific thing in there. - Sure. - But I think since they talked about it, if they're looking in different places, there's probably a little bit of that warlocky, patrony type, just glancing through the index to see if there's anything in these books. - Yeah, like history of separating oneself from a demon pack. - (laughs) - A list of demons in hell. - That's a big Rolodex, but we can get to it. So let's do it like this.

Oh, baby, I love this. Okay. We're gonna give you 20 time hit points. Every time you wanna research something, I'm gonna ask you for a research role. And every time you research something, we're going to roll a D4 and shave that many off of your time hit points. - Mm-hmm. - When you run out of time hit points, someone is going to come into this room and just kind of ask you what's going on. Not necessarily combative, but it does mean your face gets out there and they, you know, that type of thing. Does that sound fair? - Absolutely. - Yes. It's research roles investigation.

- Sometimes. - Okay. - It depends. So all right, so let's start with general demonology, right? You're looking for a specific name. So there is reels of this stuff. So let's roll a D4. - Okay. - Two hours off. So 18. This time, give me an investigation. Yes. You guys could take turns. It'll be great. - I have a plus three in investigation. - Me too. So I think we're in equal waters. - Just cut to the part where you roll a 28 or something. - So we're each rolling or? - No, no, no, no. One at a time. You could assist each other though. - Okay. - All right. You go first, I'll assist.

- Okay. Oh, well 15. - Still 15. - I have to say still, you rolled a nine, got a 15. You're doing fine. So it does take a bit to find the demon you're after 'cause they have a list of named demons. Then they have entries for just the type of demon they are. Right? There are suffering demons. There are demons tied specifically to certain weather patterns and nature and things like that. So then they get into the names and you're flipping through. There's a lot about this guy, Darmok. Like you just, it's like a bunch of fucking pages about that. - Get over yourself.

- So you're gonna get to Kolgoth. Kolgoth has a big section, like bigger than you'd think. And there are several... There are several people he's been tied to over the years. And it does have a listing of different people. And I'm gonna need a perception check for something here. This time let's do Ruby. - Yeah, good. She has a better one. - Perception with help or just with assistance? - Yeah. Oh, no, no, no. With assistance, you guys are... - Oh, we're in the nether. - Oh shit. - 14. - Oh shit. You rolled a five, I got a 14. Holy hell. Okay. So what's interesting about Kolgoth is a lot of demons are on the DL.

You know what I mean? But the nature of this specific demon is kind of investing in people. Like the more people he gets a chance to like drain from and the better. So in the short time we've been playing this campaign, how many times has he offered to like, it's like, ooh, what if it... You know, he's constantly doing that. That is not a new thing. He didn't just get comfortable. So there are decades upon decades upon decades and you're going back. And there's stories going back to like the early 900s. This guy's gotten around. I don't want to call him a slut, but this demon got around, you know?

- We don't slut shame here. - No. And every demon has a classification. And the classification is to denote two things. One, how much power does this demon have? And two, how difficult would it be to, you know, combat this presence or, you know what I mean? In case of like an exorcism situation. Kolkoth has one of the highest rankings. This is a grand demon. This is a demon that's basically slumming it in Theria. Instead of ruling in hell, he is hanging out. You know, he's a ride or die bitch. There is one more thing I want you to roll to see if you notice.

And this time we're going to bounce back to Nahira. I want an insight check. - Not my best. Plus one. - With assistance and yeah, you're gonna, yeah, you're gonna nail it. It's fine. - 18. - 18. There you go. So while Kolkoth has been tied to dozens of people over the years, there's a last name that keeps popping up. And some of the, like you're looking into it and it's not always cat. Like it's categorized by rough timeframe, but they obviously don't necessarily have, you know, like a year to year thing. They just kind of have what they've, you know, but a demon this powerful, they're keeping tabs on.

They were, you know, and the entries stop a little while ago. Like it doesn't look like this has been updated a bit, but the last name Mundan keeps coming up over and over again. Like at least a few generations. Going all the way back to a guy named Silas. - Silas Mundan, M-U-N-D-A-N. - Yep. - Hmm. You know anybody by this name? Mundan? - Do I? - I don't think so, probably not. - Don't roll for it. No, this is not a heist. - Yeah, right. - Let's just see. (laughter) - You related to one of these? - Not that I know of. - It's a big family. I didn't see it on the tree.

But my processor almost melted trying to load it all. - I mean, it sounds like, like it or not, it's not like we could just get him out of there. If we tried. This, he's way too powerful for anything like that. We'd have to ask him to leave if that was the case. I don't think we could force it. It's my point. - We don't have that information yet, but I feel a little bad looking into this now, seeing that Koga was tied to one family. I feel like we may have learned something about Khaimir he didn't want us to know. - Hmm. Well, listen, if he doesn't want us to know it, we don't know it.

Let's just tell you what, she's gonna take whatever that book is, she's gonna just close it up gently and say, look, we need to get out of here as soon as we can. I think we got a lot of what we needed. We're in the demon section. Why don't we just see if we can find something about demon horns? Just let this be for now. - I understand where you're coming from, Ruby, I don't want to learn any more about Kogoth, but I do want to look up possibly disconnecting from a grand demon. This was just a history of demons. This wasn't what I was specifically after.

- I don't know. You say, do you feel bad finding out something about his past or maybe something he's connected to? I'll be honest with you, I feel bad thinking about taking something away from him that feels more like him than anything. - This was never about taking away from him and just giving him an option should he ever want to leave. I want to be able to offer that instead of him feeling stuck. I've been in a place where I couldn't, there felt like there was no light, there was no other option, but what I was doing. And someday maybe he'll want to come out the other side.

We both know Kogoth is no good for Chimaera and I'm not going to force him to separate. But if Chimaera ever comes to us looking for help, I'd love to have that help ready. - You're a good mama. She's going to squeeze her hand a little bit. I know that feeling too. I feel like I needed to come out the other side of a tunnel. For me, that was Lagerin. It's always been that way. He saw something in me that I never even feel like I had, but he saw it. So I guess if he needs to get out of a tunnel, I'd be there for him too. - So, and then she's going to finish shoving the book away, like back into its lot.

We've learned more about him. Now let's see if we can learn about just how to separate from demons. - Well, let's roll another d4. - Oof. - Ooh, that's a four. Okay, that's fine. You got plenty of time. - We're getting a ton. - Yeah, there's still 14. So, oh boy. Give me an investigation. I believe we're to Ruby again. - Yeah, my turn. Actually, I tell you what, because of one of my background's features, I can add an expertise die on top of one roll a day, whatever it might be. So I'm going to add this on top of... - So a d6 instead of a d4? - D6, and we'll see what happens.

We're in a rush is why Ruby's like, let me put all my effort into this. - Oh, yeah. Whoa, shit, 22. Oh boy, you are going to hit the jackpot. There's several rituals for de-binding someone, which is essentially breaking a contract with a demon. And obviously the weaker the demon, the easier it is to do. The stronger the demon, the less they're going to want, they're going to go kicking and screaming. So there's a couple of different options. One, it very much depends on if the host wants to sever the binding, because if they don't, oh boy, it makes it a lot tougher.

But if they are on board, you can essentially re-summon the demon and make them completely corporeal and bind them with the host inside that circle. At that point, it's a fight to the death. A demon that strong, you're going to have to kill it. Now, if they if they aren't willing. Oh boy. So you're not going to like this, but you can knock Chimera out and over a agonizingly slow amount of time, you can douse him in holy water. It will burn. And you can weaken the demon enough that the host can't put up much of a fight. But there is the chance that the host can give the demon enough power that the demon can take over the host for a short amount of time and essentially make him corporeal again.

But the host and Kogoth will have joined. So it's both of them and their power. We just glance over that part. There's like a 10 percent chance you got to kill your friend after that. So like it's like, oh, yeah. So they're kind of reading over each other's shoulders, sort of like pouring down. And at some point it's probably like long silences, reading all of this complicated, like, oh my God, oh my God. And Ruby just says, I mean, it seems simple. (laughter) Nighthear is just going to look at Ruby. I mean, it's straightforward. I mean, it's terrible, but it's, you know, it could be done.

Let's just take down the ritual circle, have it, any chance or anything necessary and just have it. So Nighthear starts copying it to make sure that we have everything that we need. Should our friend Chimaera ever want out of his abusive relationship? Well, while she is doing the copying of that, because we got that information, we got what we needed from about the Kolegoth stuff. Ruby's just going to, while we're in there, she's going to be looking for any sort of information about greater demon horn type stuff. She's going, well, I'm going to look for the stupid component stuff.

Yeah. As if this were easy to find. Just to look and see what she can find. I'll help in just a second. As she's like finishing up, making sure the symbols match up perfectly and don't want to mess that up. She'll be pulling out random books and sort of making a stack on a table to sort of quickly go through. Let's jump back over to Loggern and Chimaera. Where are we off to next? I think we're going to go see... I think we're going to go see... Loggern pulls Chimaera into an alley real quick. Okay. Listen, you can forge. Like he looks around and he says all kinds of things, right?

Hypothetically, if you knew somebody in Fair Bay who had money and a reputation for spending money, do you think you could maybe forge up a, just a bill of sale of a couple of important gemstones to be charged to that person and any accounts they may hold? You mean like this? He pulls one out. Shit, that's exactly what I was talking about. Holy shit. Do you want me to roll for that or do something for the next? Not now. In the moment, yes. Okay, gotcha. It would be easy to roll now. Loggern, we're of the same mind. Of the same mind because if we can just walk out with those gems, like because we've bought them, then that would be so much easier.

I mean, don't call it a heist, but it's a heist. It's a purchase. It's just a purchase. Legal and on top of the table. All above board, exactly. Documentation, it's all in order. Yeah. Now, Jason, what I don't want to do is walk in. Yeah, I don't want to do a heist. I don't know if I've been clear about that. I've been picking it up on it. I'm good at reading people. All right. Subtlety is out the window. So what I don't want to do is go in and be surprised by how well forged these documents are. Can he can he roll them against me? You know, I mean, like if Loggern scrutinizes these documents, be like, come here, you used crayon for this.

Like, I don't want to go in the store. OK, no, no, no. This isn't OK. I guarantee you this is something and this goes for all of you, all of your skill sets. You're never going to be in a position where the thing you do the best is done so shittily that someone else in the party could have done it. That is not the problem. In this specific instance, you're trying to forge papers for someone who. Their job is to check the authenticity of things. Sure. Is this gemstone real? So you're you're you're you're going against that. It could be almost perfect, but it's like it's it's like printing money, right?

It's got to be on the right paper. It's got to have the right like hologram, the holographic mark, and it has to be making fake licenses, anything like that. It could look perfect to me, but like even a bouncer who knows what to look for or someone who works a register all day, they can hold it up. They got, you know, there's ways of testing that that the regular person just wouldn't notice. Sure, in the modern world. But I'm wondering, like, what's the magic? With magic. So here's OK, I will say. It it requires a role on my part as well. Sure. Yeah, no, that's fine.

I just, you know, Logrin just wants to see it first, I guess is what I'm saying. Before we walk into the store with it, I don't want to be surprised. Absolutely. Yeah, no, this again, everything I just said, it'll look it's like, no, and depending on how well you talk might not even check. Yeah. OK. There's got to be some risk involved in this very. Sure. Yeah, I'm not I'm not trying to just win without having to roll. I'm just saying, like Logrin, you know, if we're going to do this because it's not a heist, you've got to you know, he needs to be feel sure.

That's all. OK, so. He yeah, he'll take a look at the whatever it is you produce and like flip it over. He's like, Holy shit, you just have these. Well, I was thinking ahead last night, I, you know, like there would even be a monogram stamp of that family seal, like like it's notarized, like he knows a guy like it's it's wow, OK, shit, shit. You should have led with this. This is pretty good. I've even got a little seal here and I go and I do a little press digitization and there's a like a small like gold looking seal of the of that family like in my hand.

Sure. Yeah. And that's the thing in a world with magic, you are not the first people to think about this. You're not the first players to think of like it's like, well, just and you know, so if there have to be they you know, there have to be circumstances where it's like, well, let me check this. I mean, I'm going to give you fifty thousand dollars in gemstones and you walk away like it's. Yeah. I mean, according to the shopping list, it's like six thousand dollars in gemstones. But yeah, well, there's a markup like you're in a like, you know, hell of a markup.

Yeah, we're getting ripped off here. We're going somewhere else. Hey, you want to go mine them yourself? You can go. It might be diamond markup is what it is. Yeah. Might come to that when we're in the labor camps for getting caught doing this. Yeah, it's not a heist. It's a different felony, but it's not a heist. Like, yeah, specifically it's forgery. This this this feels like a fun way to potentially end a campaign. Let's do it. Let's let's get in there. And Larkin just takes a deep breath and kind of pinches his nose and goes. All right, we're doing it last.

And so everybody knows. So if we need to leave. We can leave. It's crazy. All right. We got to go talk to a car driver. He's like, we're on our way to go talk to this guy, Raffin and like Larkin just couldn't not be like, I need to know what you have on hand for. Or what you can make quickly. Yeah, just like, yeah, hypothetically, if we were going to do a heist, what would you be ready for? All right. So we're going to go find this dude, Raffin. And I think the the pitch for him is going to be, hey, did you know we just spent the morning getting the OK from basically every merchant in town that they would like to start doing business with the Frostborn fort?

And they want they all elected you to be the driver for that. And hey, wouldn't that turn a nice profit for you specifically? You can even maybe hire some help. Yeah. Up and coming. Big new thing. Big latest thing out there in the in the waste. It's Fort Frostborn. Not a shithole sometimes. Not a shit hole. Definitely not a shit hole. So you're going to find Raffin. There's there's a very large stable section of the city and there are places where people have their carts parked and everything. And Raffin is underneath of of his cart. You're going to see some human legs stick.

Just he's a human. So you're looking for regular sized legs, just average legs. So you're going to see some legs down here. OK, so Raffin's underneath that and you're going to hear him like hammering at something and just like it's like bam, bam, bam. And then just like every second, like every every like there be a pause for a few seconds, like like just like gasping for air under there. Is this a bad time? And like, stop. You're going to see his little legs. Who's that? Hi, what are you doing down there? I'm working on my car. Who sent you? Very conspicuous, like it's like, hey, people with a lot of money who would like to hire you.

He's going to start like inching his legs out and just like, like pop under there and like, his eyes are adjusting to the light and everything. And you're he was expecting someone else. You can tell. So he just kind of like squint. Oh, OK. Oh, my God. OK, OK. Hi, Raffin. How are you? You said money. I sure did. Yeah. So we've been we've been doing a little bit of shopping around the area, trying to stir up some trade. And every single person we talked to gave us your name is somebody who would be able to facilitate that. So no, that sounds right. Sure. Yeah. OK, before you say anything else, this would be outside the city.

Yeah, that's fine. I'll do that. That's fine. How much? How much we talking? Oh, that's well, so here's the thing. I'm just trying to set up the trade route. I'm not actually you're not trading for me, right? This is between a fort that's been put up halfway between here and and Winterhaven. In order to trade with Winterhaven, which you're not allowed to trade with, not you, but them, the merchants. Oh, yeah, OK. Yeah. Yeah. Aubrey's got a thing about. Yeah, they've got a they've got a thing. Yeah. How much is however much you can make? The sky's the limit. You can do it all.

Picture me in MLM. OK, I thought I thought there was going to be look, OK, your own. Stop. Come here. He's like, too far now. I shouldn't have gone with the boss. What we do is we give you the tools to make your own. Yeah, just. I understand that scares people that they can have their own agency and be their own person. I get that, but no, you're paying me an exposure. I know what I know with this. I look, I have driven a lot of routes for for potential growth and all that. I I get it back to you. And he's going to point to Logran. I like your pitch better. I need money now ish because there are some people who I owe money to and they.

Their interest rate is surprisingly violent. So what I'd like is leaving the city's fine, actually. And maybe I stay out there for a little bit till this trade gets going. Come on back and I'll be able to pay them off and we can keep this thing going. You got a timeline in mind now tomorrow? Yeah, probably immediately. I love immediately. All right, great. So and like, I'll literally hand him a list of all the merchants who said they want to do this. And like, I mean, here's the thing is like, here's where the fort is. Here's all the merchants who want to trade with that for knock yourself out.

How you can stay out there as long as you want. Here's the road we took. You know. All right. Give me what are what's a list of the merchants you already got? What's the list of the merchants you already got in? What's this place called? Fort Frostborn. Cute. I love it. OK, so what? Give me a list of those vendors so I can get the trade going back and forth and I can come back with money instead of just leaving with goods. Well, they're going to have the yeah, they're going to have that. 100 percent. One second. I got. Just had some of these names. Oh yeah, I. Well, you're rolling stuff.

I quickly write down. Who the fuck is it? We got some of these names. Doxa and Aris? Yeah, Doxa. Oh, there's Doxa. Yeah, Aris. Yeah. There's a lot of names. Yeah, I write down Doxa, Aris. Hell, I write down the names of some of the just like some of the. Holy shit. Brukall. Yeah. Yeah, right. Grimble. Yeah, 100 percent. Yeah, so there you know. I need like five references. I need. Exactly. Yeah, yeah, yeah. OK, so he wrote a crit on his insight check and as you're kind of like faffing about about the like, his eyes are going to start to narrow. You don't have anything official yet, do you?

Well, listen, it's a three way transaction and I had to start at one end of that. This is where we're starting the forts there. We we set it up last week. All right. There's a whole group of people there now. There's a whole group of people there now. It's all getting what? Establishing the fort. It sounds like you established it. You did it. It is a fort. There's people now that need trade. So are we going to do this or no fucking yowza? OK, look, OK. You want me to venture out to a fort that's barely on the map? It's on your map. That's it. With some goods from some vendors who you lied to better than you lied to me just now to potentially get money from potential vendors that may appear in your fort at some time.

Yes. Here's the thing, if you're not interested, that's fine. You look, no, no, I still got to leave the city anyway if I don't have the money. So this at least maybe there's money out there. Fine, fine, fine. I'll give it two weeks. And then I got to start heading back because I do have a job while I'm still alive. Right. And they, you know, and they say the richest man is the one with the most opportunity. You got to stop letting him do the pitch. This is terrible. This is am I am I having an off day? I look at Logram. I'm like, it's just he's far too squirrely.

You're doing fine. Listen, is it something like my own boss? Huh? Just from your little side hustle. Wow. So he's like, listen, obviously there's risk involved, but it sounds like there's risk involved here, too. So maybe you're the perfect guy for the job. If nothing else, even if there's not a single person in there, you can make coin off of in the fort. You can fence it to Winterhaven from there. That's the point. It's a midpoint between the town you're not allowed to trade to in this town. Yeah, OK. Yeah, I'll get the yeah. Look, the stuff will sell no matter what.

People need it out there. Fine. It's it's fine. Do you guys want to play some cards? Oh, absolutely. OK, great. Small pots to start. And then we'll I imagine I've established a line of credit doing this for you so we can start and we'll just see where it goes. Insight. It's not a high check. Yeah, I don't trust this for a second. Our first crit won! Yeah, legit. The hell? Yeah. I haven't played cards in a while. What do you got? Do you want to roll on these shirts? I'll play a couple of hands with them at least. I was not going to, but. I see what the old crit table says, because there is a crit table for fails, too.

Yeah, I mean, I assume Camara is playing, too, right? Like we're both going to sit down and like what's he got? Like a friggin poker table at his in his garage. No, he's just like he's playing for like it's desperation, right? It's like he's in the corner. So, yeah, he's like win, lose or draw. He's just a degenerate gambler like he is like if he wins, he'll play long enough to lose like he does not. What I was referring to is the the crit table in the chat. Oh, yes. A one. Oh, one. Oh, good. Reverse insight. What does that do? Then by trying to read the target, you instead gave away more about yourself.

The target creature identifies one thing that you're trying to conceal. This may be a secret, a truth or a personal failing. I am wearing a disguise. Yeah, I was going to say, no, he knows you're wearing a wig and makeup. If he starts losing cards, which he will eventually, he's terrible at it. I'm going to I'm going to roll a die because he's either going to bring it up in conversation as like, why are you wearing a disguise or like who are you hiding from? Maybe I could leverage that for you know what I mean? Like, you know, I got to roll one through ten.

It's going to be the latter and. God damn it. So he might he might as he's losing at cards and he's probably going to lose to Chimera and just lose and lose and he's in the hole more and more. So. Who are you hiding from? Big guy who's looking for you? Nobody. And that's why I want to keep it right now. You dressed up because no one's looking for you. Exactly. I know a lot of people in this town and I don't want to see a single one of them. Oh, OK. He's going to think about he's going to think about. Using that to make some money, but he doesn't know who's looking for you, and he figures he can make a steady income by doing this thing if he doesn't get murdered on the road first, and he's so desperate that you may have found the only person willing to do this for you on credit.

So congratulations. I feel like he's a good fit. He's a good fit for desperation. Like it is. We're not going to start with a listers. It's just not going to happen. Oh, no, no, no. Let's jump back. Let's jump back to my theory and Ruby. Is there anything else you need from this library or are you wrapping it up? I think we were just going to look up. Possibly who would have a greater demon horn? Not demons, but like a collector or something. OK, let's let's do that. Let's let's. And then I think that was it, right, Jasper? Yeah, I mean, that's we were just trying to get this list taken care of.

And the rest of it, you said you were just going to like Marko for us because it's general research anyways. Yeah, this is just general. Like if you're looking for or and stuff like that. Well, it's like, well, OK, you know, and I'm just going to give you. Yeah, yeah. So you're doing great on time. You still have 12 time hit points left. Give me an investigation, please. I forget who's turned it is. I think it's night there is. I think so, too. I think it's mine, yeah. Oh, wow, 12. That's that's the lowest roll, I think. So what we're going to do, because that took a little longer, we're just going to shave one more time.

It die off. That's OK. So now we're down to eight. Now it's getting a little OK. So you are going to OK. Like everything, there are strings attached, but. The church, like the church in the city, has things like that on display. Like within the church, like it is like like there are vampiric trophies, there are, you know, demon hunting trophies. They are there. They were crusades, basically, of Aubrey striking out to, you know, there were young paladins looking to prove themselves. And yeah, there's even a story that goes, they summoned a greater demon in the church to slay it as like some sort of like it.

They whether it's true or not, like it's, you know, like they got some shit on display. So I imagine in one of these books, there's, you know, that kind of engraved engraving illustration of the church. And Ruby's going to sort of push it over towards Nightheera and point out and be like, look what's right there. In the in the in the illustration, there's going to be sort of like a horn sort of on a on some sort of platform or or something like that, like a trophy. I think that's what we're looking for. At least it's one of them. Logran's not going to like it.

Well, would he like not to know it, but to have it? Yeah. We probably have a moment where we're weighing, like having a look like, how much do we want to do against Logran's disapproval? There's a lot of just a long silence of just thinking things through, playing things out. OK, well, I think we got everything we needed here. We should probably get out of here before we get, you know, shook down. Yeah, I think the only thing we didn't look up was that orb, but. You had eight hit points left. Give it a shot. Nightheera is going to look to Ruby. Do you think we're pushing our luck?

I mean, how many times we've been in Aubrey? How many times we've been in the vault stacks, whatever this place is called? Yeah. She's going to head to the section that's like greater artifacts. Orbs and pondering of. So we're going to roll a D4. This will see how much time you guys. That's a one. So you got seven left. All right. So you'd have to roll real bad to like, you know. OK. Gaming investigation. This time it's Ruby. All right. As long as you don't roll a one for great. OK. Look at that. 15. 15. You are going to find this. It's not a great answer, but. You could make one, and this is very give a mouse a cookie.

It's another list of things you're going to need and a skilled arcane, you know, some sort of artifice or something like that to make. So it would basically be it's like, well, shit. OK, yeah. You know, it's the difference between like buying drugs and it's like, well, I guess we could make meth. Like it's you know what I mean? Like I imagine. I don't do meth. Like that wasn't. But there are two places. On the continent that have had them. You're not going to like it. One is Uminiro. But who the hell knows what's in there? The others of Dicia. I got to figure out where my great great grandchild lives.

Which one which which one did she marry? The real ones or the fake ones? Like I imagine that there's kind of a thing with the elves where this is like. It's already complicated because it's the drow part of my family. So there's already like a disconnect there. Oh, man. All right, well, yeah, Rubio, just say all right. Well, it looks like I mean, I could probably make one. It would. It probably wouldn't work, but I could make it. I think we need it to work. Then we'd have to probably go to some places we probably don't really like going or I don't know. Maybe it's not so bad.

The weather's probably nice in Odysseus. I might have family there. Uminiro is a given, but. People don't come back from there sometimes. At least that's what I heard. Who knows, maybe you'll learn how to make it and know it will work. Let's take the ingredient list. Yeah. So again, writing down all of the if it were to be made list, maybe we can get that another time, too. Anybody's ever played like like an open world survival craft game, even even like your Minecraft and stuff like that, it is it's like, oh, God, now I got to forge all these things to make this thing and it's Jesus.

It is about killing as many birds with one stone as possible. So far, you guys have done really well. You've planted seeds that are going to, you know, not bad. Yeah. All right. But with this, I think it's about time for us to head out of here. Yeah, I feel like people are starting to circle. We need to get out of here. Yeah. We need to get out of here. Let's cut back one more time. To Khaimira and Logran. We're going to Gennoors. I sure are. So you cannot miss this place, right? It is this big, resplendent shop. Now, the thing is, the building is very large, but everything's on the second floor.

The first floor is just. It's almost just hype, like there are banners and stuff like that. It's like, oh, here's what we have upstairs. If you're interested, go through the security gates. And like there are Goliath bodyguards that are just like chilling. And if you approach the door like you'll hear like a clean and it'll unlock and they'll open it for you and let you go in. But there are two doors like that. And these are big reinforced bastards. Like it would take a while to blast through them like you could tell. Solid construction. But if you go through those two doors, there is a very portly halfling man.

And he is coated head to toe in jewelry. This is a real pinky ring kind of guy. Like he's just, you know, he's got like several earrings on each ear and like he jingles and jangles when he walks. And as soon as he sees you two walk in, he is he is instantly going to be like full barrage of charm, like, oh, welcome. Well, he's he's going to walk up to Logrin first. Good day. I am so happy to see you. And he's going to grab your hand and like kiss it like just. And he's going to he's going to reach over to come here. Welcome. I am going to. You are free to peruse any of my wares.

Please let me know if you'd like a fitting or you looking for something special, something for your significant other. Something for each other. Oh, you never give me gifts anymore. Logrin. You don't say Logrin, do you? No, I don't. But I forget what the name we're calling you is. Didn't we just go full on like impersonating sin or were we doing something else? I forget what name you gave us. I was murky on that, too. I'll be honest. Yeah. Well, you see, we gave the name Gremblehuff to to stand up. Not that we have to copy that exactly with this guy, but he's a drunk and probably dead.

So like we don't. He's definitely got a skull fracture. I mean, whatever name you use, I just don't use the name. I just say, oh, you never give us anymore. Yeah. Well, maybe when we're done here. And do a little wink. I would love to have a fitting. This looks amazing. You have some exquisite pieces here. Very exciting. I love hearing that. I can't hear it often enough. Thank you. I very much appreciate it. I do custom engravings, too. If you're looking for something a bit more personalized, I do custom work in general. If you don't see something you like, I can make something you love.

Oh, my God. You should have that up on the store somewhere. I love that. That's amazing. Just off the top of my head. Brilliant genius. Well, unfortunately, very unfortunately, we're just here to pick up some gems that were sold. That's it. Just to pick up some raw gems. A small shipment here. I'm sure you know about this, and he'll give him the documents. I just realized this plan also requires him to have Alzheimer's or something. He has to not remember making a purchase or selling something. But we'll see. We'll see. Depending on the role, there might be a great.

Yeah, we'll see. Yeah. If the order is made from... So my theory, just to kind of step outside of it for a second, right? The logic behind the heist. Is that it's yeah, there's an account for this, this, this, whoever it is who's extremely wealthy down in this other town. So it's like this family requires these gems. Put it on our tab, essentially. Yeah, sure. Yeah. So the thing to know about Fairbay is on its face, any listeners who've been listening for years and years, it's like, oh, it's a huge city. It's, you know, imagine almost overnight. Fairbay becomes like waterfront property.

It already was. But now that it's got a nice climate, like it's like 45, 50 degrees year round. Like it's like, holy shit. Like that would be a tropical destination to everybody else who's freezing their ass off on the continent. So like, yes, it is in demand all of a sudden. That tiny little town grew and grew like over the last century. Holy shit. Like, you know, so there are very, you know, very rich people who live in Fairbay. So first of all, may I have a deception check, please? Yes. I'll assist with that. And you do get an additional plus one because of my lesson before.

This is your shit, right? That like this is this is why you were built. Yes. It's a lie. Plus one. OK, let's go. Please come on. Yes. It was almost a two and I was going to crash out. One bad roll does not a failure make. We could, you know, that's true. I imagine if it were, it'd be like the total recall thing of like the guy sweating and just trying to convince him that like. So, OK, 25 is is great, even for somebody who professionally sees through bullshit. So he's he's going to like, oh, of course, I'm always where's it from? For a client in Fairbay. I can I is there a name that I can know?

Is there like a family in Fairbay or is there like a company in Fairbay? Bog Bottom. Oh, perfect. Bog Bottom. Yeah. Oh, Hog Bottom. OK, got it. No, Bog Bottom. Like, no, no, no, no, no. We're going full. Yeah. Bog. Thank you. Perfect. It's the alliteration. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Bog Bottom. Yeah. I don't remember where I heard that idea, but it just came to me right now. So I'm just going to. The Bog Bottom naturally will go on on their line of credit. And yeah, it's just a just a couple of gems this time around. Nothing, nothing overburdening or anything. We have a long way to travel.

Of course, I'm I'm always are you are you delivering this for them personally? That's a long track. You you you don't look if you don't mind me saying you don't look too weathered. Thank you. Marry me. I can ditch this one and get with a real one. I'm not a homewrecker. I am just a purveyor of goods. I just the cold weather does things to the skin. That's true. That's true. Logrin holds Khaimera's hand. He gets possessive. Sorry, purchase order. He's got to notice and it's like, OK, no, what? No, we we weather the storms together. That's how we make it through.

Oh, that should be on some piece of jewelry I sell you one day. Yes. I look at my look over at Logrin. Yes, it should. Just not. And he's going to take the purchase order and. Oh, what? No offense to the bulk bottoms. What do they need raw gems for? I'm not sure exactly, but I think they have a specific cut in mind for them. One that that they they want done by someone specific. You know how these clients are, but it has to be the very thing. So if I can convince them, maybe we can bring these gems back and have them set in something exquisite from here. I hope you're getting paid extra for all this extra legwork you're doing.

I hope so, too. All right, fine. I will try not to be personally hurt that they didn't have me cut their gems for them, but I'm sure some local fraud can do it for them. And when they're displeased with that work, they can come back to me. He's going to kind of tunnel behind his his counter here and go back. There are two Goliath bodyguards, just arms crossed, just kind of like in here, look just hanging out like they're, you know, they see you guys are vibe and they're fine. But like, you know. They're just decked out in gold chains. Oh. And after I'd say like four or five minutes.

He's going to come back out and these are boxed up like these are in tiny wooden crates. And he's going to take those wooden crates and then put them in a tiny chest, lock it. And then bring the key in the chest over here. All right. Now, obviously, I'm sure you know what you're doing. These are stuffed with some some paper and cloth to make sure that nothing happens to them. You'd have to drop them quite a long ways to to do anything to them. But you don't want to be on the hook for fifty thousand dollars in gems, I would imagine so. No, I do not. This job pays well, but not that well.

Mm hmm. I I hear it. Well, maybe one day this one will get a job and you can be a house husband. That's what he told me when he asked me to marry him. They all do get arrangement so far. It has been it. It has been. It has been. Can I tell you how awkward it is for someone to start a conversation like it's the 50s and you're like, I've had people do that with me and Elle and like they'll talk to me. It's like, don't worry, she won't spend all your money. It's like, motherfucker, what decade is this? We both earn money. It's a shared account like weird and it happens very rarely.

But it's like, oh, like I hate any comment that's like women be shopping, right? It's like everybody be shopping. See me at a hobby shop, please. No one's laughing at that joke. Shut the hell up. It's just so weird. Nobody be shopping. Yeah, nobody be shopping. Maybe. Motherfucker eggs are $12. Shut up. Anywho. Thank you so much. This is this is incredible. And I love your store. I love everything about here. And by the way, I will try and put a good word in for you so that they can bring some more business here. We'll get these gems set into something that you arrange.

Well, at the very least, tell them next time, if they're just going to buy raw gems, I will mark up prices just to spite them. I do not mind losing business at the cost of getting to perfect my art. If I could suggest something a little bit bold. And he's going to be like, hmm. Do you have perhaps do you have perhaps a sample of the type of cut you might recommend for these? If they like it. It was it is well within our means to make the journey back here to have you cut the gems if you can convince them. I would have to give you a smaller gemstone. Of course.

And it would be alone, obviously. Of course, I am fine. Honestly, it's within your best interest to get back to me because you're getting paid for both trips. I'll tell you what else. If you can convince them to come back back here, I'll make it worth your while. Hmm. Shh. Shh. That sounds good. Don't worry, I have my lips in their ears. Stop putting your things in things. I have I have their ears. I I have a line of communication. Well, this is a formality, but I just need a deception check from Logrin and we can get this going. Sounds good. I'm helping. I'm helping.

That's a 14. I if not for the baller role earlier and the way you've hit it off with this guy, I would say he'd suspect more. He's not crazy about doing this, but he's going to give you like a smaller like a like, you know, one sixteenth the size, something like that. It's like this is the this is the cut. But because you're dealing with the rich, the rich get way more courtesy than, say, a poor like myself would get. So this is kind of standard. Like rich people are allowed to just loan cars like they could just drive them for a couple of weeks to see if they like it and they might buy four like it's.

That's the that's the privilege that they get. So he will get you like it's like, here's a smaller emerald. Obviously, this is just to show off the cut, but this catches the light from any angle, even in the dark. This is actually really nice. This is this is good. This is good. I'm like I'm almost dropping it like just looking at Logan like, yeah, this is this is good. This is real good. Yeah, that's good. But this is really good. Yeah. In fact, you have a bag of these. No, not a heist. Not a heist. The sack with dollar signs on it, please. Are you sure I can't convince you two to get anything today?

Not to be pushy. I know you're on a salary. Not today, but we will be back. Mm hmm. What are you into? Maybe I could come up with a custom piece that you just couldn't say no to on your return. Oh, well, I think something out of Adamantine would be pretty good. Pretty amazing. That's kind of what that was. That's kind of what we're into. Yeah. That's very, very manly working class type of thing. But there's some elegance to it, I suppose. He's recommending it because of my ancestry. It's very thoughtful of him. In fact, I don't know how much you have lying around, but while we're on our on the road, we might be able to source some for you if you have an idea where we might find it.

Oh, well, I don't get much call for something like that, but it's always nice to have specialty goods on hand. I do know this hot little metal worker. You know what? Let's do this. Do you have a map? Something I can use? Of course. Thank you. I'm going to mark a couple of places I know about and I'll just mark them by likelihood. I don't want to waste your time, but you have quite the road to travel anyway. So if you could pick up a few things home from the store. And he's going to kind of etch in. He's going to give you the likelihood of each thing. He's like, well, there might even be mining operations in the area.

You can make a deal with them, but there will be a markup. Getting it yourself is always the cheapest route. That's understood. I really appreciate this. I think that this is going to work out great for everybody. And hey, and he'll put out his hand to shake it. And this is not deception. I will come back and you and I will do business again for sure. He'll like like surprisingly like like manly like he like he likes you guys. He likes you like he's just like, man, it is not every day you get to meet like two people so simpatico, you know, like it's just man.

I honestly, that means the world to me. And it just it's so heartwarming to see two people. Who are willing to go through so much, just the travel alone, the mind boggles. It sure does. Well, we have each other and that's what matters. Well, safe travels to you to hurry back. Do do do your thing. Get in there. Here you said a thing. I didn't track it all, but get in there. Ears. It's the most popular saying in Fairbay. I don't think it's gotten up here yet, but I will be using it as soon as it's. A lot. Yeah, definitely. Use it a lot. Yeah. Guys, I think that's a good time for us to stop for the night.

Good job, guys. Oh, my God. I love Log Mera. Yeah, well done. Well, well done. Getting us just a little bit, little bit extra. If this episode is not titled, this is not a heist. It's not a heist. That was great. Good job, guys. God damn. Again, banger after banger. Can't make a bad episode. You guys are too good. So, Jasper, we're going to steal that horn. I don't know. I think Ruby would want to entertain the idea, but she would not do that without Logren's consent. When we come back with what we stole. I would love for both the groups to meet up and you guys have the jewels and we have the horn.

That'd be very funny. I make everybody promise not to steal anything. And we get everybody come back and like, look what we stole.