Birdinand

This transcript is machine-generated and may contain errors in names, terminology, or attribution.

Hello, welcome, everyone who is listening to this right now. You are about to hear an incredible episode of Frostborn, which is the Dungeons and Randomness Campaign that we have been doing for at least 50 episodes now. But before you listen to that, let me tell you about a little bit more Dungeons and Randomness that you can get.

We have got two. that's right. Yes, two other campaigns that are going on that you can have access to for as little as $5. I'm getting a yes for that. Yes, that's $5.

For a Patreon tier. Let me tell you, if you like what you hear from Frostborn, you are going to love hearing these other groups that are interconnected playing in a world that we all affect. Not only that, but there is cool things like behind the scenes.

There's talks that Jason gives about the world of there and all the cool stuff and lore that is a part of that. And you can be a part of that too. Just go to patreon.com slash d-a-n-r and check that out.

There's a ton of stuff to look at. You can also go to d-a-and-r podcast.com. which is our website that has all the Patreon information, live show information, arc information, character information.

If you're like, hey, I want to jump into Frostborn, I don't have all the time to go all the way back to the beginning, but man, I sure would like to know about some of it, just so I can get some of the references and ha-haz. Then we've got the information there for you as well to check out. So please, also, there's a discord.

You don't even have to be a part of any of that to come in. A lot of us are in there. We like to joke and laugh and talk about the show and talk about a bunch of other stuff there too.

So check our Discord out as well. With all that being said, thank you so much for listening. And please enjoy the episode.

We are just 300 and 45 days away from our biggest dragon con ever.

They say a bird in the hand is worth two in the bush. Today we find out if that saying is true, just replace hand with gear heart. Hey, everybody out there, I'm Jasper and I play Ruby Pedigrew on Dungeons and Randomness's sixth campaign called Frostborn.

Welcome to episode 58. Listen, we've been doing this a long, long time. 15 years, in fact.

To help sift through literally hundreds and hundreds of hours of amazing content, we have recap episodes to catch you up quickly. Scroll down in our feed to find a couple for Frostborn, and a new one is coming up in just a couple of weeks. Even more is being planned to help bring all of our theory and lore to the surface for you.

So stay tuned. Quick shout out to our friends at E.N. Publishing, who make Level Up Advanced Fifth Edition.

That's the system running this whole campaign of ours. It takes everything you already know about Dungeons and Dragons 5th edition, and add so much more around character and storytelling. And honestly, it just works for our world and our play style.

Code D-A-N-D-R gets you a discount. Also, shout-out to GM Assistant. It turns your sessions into organized notes without having to lift a finger other than rolling your dice.

Keep your lore intact and everyone on the same page. The same code D-A-N-D-R works there too. All right, last time on Frostborn, once we got flushed down into the depths of the copper mine, we found an ancient arcane gate that clearly allows for some rapid transportation across all of Theria if we can get it powered up.

We also found something incredibly massive in there, either trapped or in some sort of prison stasis. Hard to tell because of a bunch of collapsed rocks, but when Ruby took a little sample of a claw, the size of her. It twitched.

So, yep, we fired up the gate and got out of there really fast. Good news, it looked like it could take us right back to the entrance of the mine just above, steps away from the gear heart. Good news.

Today, that's where we begin. Logrin gets a new toy, and Ruby makes a new feathered friend, temporarily at least. Take it away, Jason Massey.

Let's do that thing. Where we go around the table and introduce ourselves, I'm Jason, I'm the dungeon master going around the table, start with Ian.

Hello, I'm Ian. My pronouns are he, him, any. And I play chimera in the deep wing warlock.

Keep it a call with. Jameson.

I am Jameson.

Yeah.

I'm going to do.

I love it. Is it that I said your name? Jameson. Like is it, is that?

You didn't have to repeat. Yeah. No.

But I wanted to. No. No.

We're going to talk later about it.

Right.

Right. Yeah.

Honestly.

I'm writing a sternly worded letter. I play Logger and Gregborn. He's a Dwarven Marshall.

And Jasper, I guess if we're not doing that before.

We've lost the... There's not even a bit. There's nothing to do here anymore.

I'm Jasper, everybody. He-him. I play Ruby Pedigrew, the Half-Hork.

Justlinger. Adept.

And last, last certainly not least, the birthday girl, Susan.

Hi. I'm Susan. I can't say my own name.

I'm Susan Spinator. My pronouns she'll be playing night there. Rylith the Elven Rogue Assassin.

And this comes out Monday, right?

Yeah. Yeah.

Okay. Make sure everybody listening, make sure to go to kickstarter.com and check out very big comics because a new Kickstarter will be launching soon by our very own James and Alcorn.

Hey, that is a lot. Yeah. Hell of yours.

Thank you. You. You're giving you.

I thought, didn't you say that. You. You.

You. The owner of that company should like. I did collaborate with your friends.

Nothing if not good business people.

I would have said yes. It's fine.

Happy birthday, Susan.

Happy birthday, Susan. I think you started to say Susan birthday when you stumbled on your name.

Susan Bursnator.

This is a birthday. The drinking a day.

I just keep getting better every year.

That's how you guys celebrate, right?

Every year I get closer. Guys, it's been a little while since we sat down well before DragonCon. And that's good. I like to keep the, I like to keep it simmering that that that that anticipation.

So we're trying to get back to Esther Holt. But first, we get a couple of things to wrap up. One, we got you guys out of that cave. That's pretty cool, huh?

Yes. Yeah.

Yeah. There is a certain form and I know you need to talk to.

Mr. Willick.

Yeah. Stretching the weight out for weeks and weeks and weeks probably wasn't the best way to. I thought Jameson might have cooled down. I don't, I think it had to have the opposite of that.

I've just been taking it on, have it on everybody around me.

Are you a foreman? Are you a foreman?

Praise man strangles foreman. And then another.

So let's paint a little picture. You guys step through this, this portal here, and you are, not roughly, but it could have been more gently, you know, ejected just a foot or so off the ground. And it's kind of like missing that for that last step on a staircase.

You go, oh shit, you thought there was one more. And you just kind of, you know, but you're back outside. You're fine.

You were hundreds of feet underground. You were a little lost. And you were next to something that definitely was alive in some capacity.

And you should. should start looking at comments on the podcast. Because people are mad that you didn't poke and prod that thing, whatever it is, a bit more.

Because everyone has theories. And now we don't know. Well, I know.

There are a couple of things against that. Number one, there were some really poor history roles that we couldn't get beyond. And secondly, as soon as that, as soon as Ruby tried to take a little piece of it, and as soon as it jittered, it was, okay, we got to go.

Go, go, go, go, go, go. This isn't going to go well. We're already in knee-deep and terrible.

This could get way worse. So I'm with you. Ruby wanted to stick around, but also Ruby needed to leave.

We have already awakened one ancient evil in his campaign. I feel like.

That's fair.

Yeah.

I think that was some you're trying for every 50 episodes. Yes.

All right. Release more shadows into the sky. Yeah.

We. All right.

So I would like...

Go ahead.

When we stumble out hitting that, like missing a Sierra, I would like because Camara's holding Ruby's hand, they tumble out and Ruby catches him and dips him. As if they had been dancing.

She does. And then she says, and seen.

I'd like for Logrin to roll a deck save to try to continue that stumble into a walk. Like he meant, like very meant, very much.

Oh, like a cat. Yeah,

very much like a like a, like I need to speak to the manager type trudge through the snow.

Oh, God. Okay. I'll tell you what. Give me a deck save. And as long as it's 13 or higher, you're fine.

Okay. 13-9 with my minus one. There it is.

I don't get a proficiency thing. So I got a six, but that's what the proficiency died that I shouldn't have. It should have been a three.

Can Ruby just, can I, can she do a little bit of a, can I, can she grab loggering?

Yeah,

okay, fine, fine, we're done.

I'm sorry, he's going to.

Can I see a real thing?

Grab him?

Give me a dexterity saving throw.

Okay.

I thought you said nice, Thera, and I'm surprised we haven't made a joke yet. Yeah.

Why is that another thing?

Right? Why hasn't that come up yet?

Oh, no.

No.

We won't take it better.

Yeah.

Susan rolled a two out there, everybody. Now, we have a thing. We have a thing where if you're playing the week of your birthday, you get double X-B. And if you're playing on your birthday, I guess we're doing this, you get triple XP. The joke is they're not going to earn any expedited. It's not because of bad roles or poor decisions.

So, starting off.

So the thing is, we know that this isn't combat. So the odds were poor for the beginning that that neither was going to roll well. So you're, honestly, it might help that you kind of step outside this thing.

And you're like, oh. And you ever, when you get mad and let's say your pant loop gets caught on like the stovetop or something and you're extra pissed. You're like, put this stove there.

Like you're just irrationally angry at stuff. It might be that where you stumble and now that's part of it. Fuck you.

I wouldn't have stumbled if not for, you know what I mean?

Like that removed. Yeah, exactly.

I want the ground raised three inches right now. Right. Let's go.

Let's get rid of that fucking door that got caught on my belt.

Stupid archie portals.

I mean, to me, it seems like very much like we all just pile out like a door that suddenly got opened that we were all waiting against or something. Yeah.

It is your first interdimensional portal. Like it's, you know, there's a learning curve.

You know what? Because of Nythera and Logren's roles, maybe he starts to assemble and Nithera like to make it look like that was intentional, but then she starts to fall along. He's going on him as well.

You can do that. Yeah. It's like people who try to stop their bookshelf from falling over and it just falls on them and they die. Yeah.

Or launches itself at them during a recording.

Oh. Yeah.

Isn't that another fear of Ian's? Maybe we shouldn't taunt the fear of him in here. Yeah.

Let's like to be morphoias.

How does you fall on you off from off the walls and slice your face off is another irrational fear.

How should be your books?

It happened to a friend of mine.

It's sliced his face off?

It sliced his nose off. No. No. Wait,

no, no, hold on. The bookshelf? Or like...

It was a pane of glass from a pain, or like a piece of art that was hanging on the wall.

That's a bit different.

Well, it's still horrific though.

I know you get a nasty, nasty paper cut. Sack.

No. Should I add to your phobia? Because I have a really nasty story. Okay.

That's for struggling. Let's not.

For those of you don't know, Ian's appendix just exploded a couple weeks back.

Thankfully, it didn't. It just my body was like, attacking it's my own body.

That is a lesson to everyone out there. Don't do sit-ups. Don't do it. It's not worth the cost.

That would cause.

I'm just saying I didn't do it before. Oh, that's it.

But it did.

Not as bad. I'm just trying to feel better about my decisions. It didn't really feel long. All right.

All right.

So, Foreman is going to see you over there. And so Foreman, Billick, and a few other workers, they were looking at your your vehicle. your vehicle, obviously, there's a, there's a, you have probably unintentionally started the craze of these guys going out and buying, you know, Dodge Rams that they can't afford.

But they're going to, they're going to see this big glowing portal, you stumbling out, and, and they're all going to turn around and look like, holy shit, can you guys just do that? Is that a thing? Oh, my God. How do you?

Because once you see this vehicle, it's like, well, I don't know what they could do, apparently. Like, you know. you know,

James said, is longer and about to trudge straight towards.

Yeah, the only reason he's not there already is because he fell over. So he was trying to get up.

So as we all sort of do that, you're going to go in one direction. Ruby's going to go immediately crossing you straight towards the gear heart. And she's going to do sort of like the animals at a trash can like shoe, shoo, a, a, da, da, do, do.

Just to do. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah, so Lagerin is definitely trudging, uh, stalking towards, towards this form. And he's like, you come here. We got to talk right now.

Can you do me favor? Give me an intimidation check.

Can I assist just by standing there? Do you want to? Yeah. I'm proficient. So I'll just give you an expertise.

Oh, that's right. You don't have to roll. Yeah, then do that.

Yeah, I'm not rolling. Yeah. I'm not rolling.

Okay.

13.

It was with the expertise. That's not bad.

I just fell out of a hole, you know.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I think it's gonna kind of catch him off guard. It's like, why are you angry?

Like, why we expected, you know, you guys to come out of the cave, all triump and everything and that like this is like, oh, I didn't, why are you? So he's going to be a little bit on guard. And I'm not going to do the raspy voice.

So just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, why are you? ride with me. A slight alteration.

What's the problem? Like, his voice is kind of high pitch. Like, why?

Why?

Well, we solved your demon problem. Bad news is the mine's closed. No more mine.

It's all gone. Get out of here. You built a mine under a lake.

And the lake went into the mine. The mine's all gone.

So narrowing in size. It's just like, well, we didn't. Okay, we were just sent here to, we didn't do the initial drilling. And did.

like we're here to just harvest. Okay. When you say a lake, do you mean that one of the tunnels has a leak?

I mean that the entire tunnel is flooded. It's gone. The mine's over. Who sent you here? Who put you out here in the middle of nowhere with this death drop of mine?

I need a name. I don't know if we're allowed to like it's a private contract. I don't If we're got out that we talk about stuff like that, we won't get hired again.

If you prefer to tell them that I'd beat you until you told me.

I didn't know that that was an option two.

That would be option two.

You don't want to know option three.

And you can still.

I was still going to give you that shotgun. Like I'm still like a deal is a deal. I,

yeah, obviously.

Okay, for a split second, your passive, like, insight would catch this. He was going to argue about it, about the job not quite being done right. And then he thinks better of it.

Mid, well, and it just thinks better of it. Because you're a man covered in granite with his fists balled up. So like, it's like, okay, okay, he did just threaten to beat me to death.

So, all right. There's a woman in Esther Holt that hired us. I can tell you where she is, but you have to promise that you won't tell her.

We told you anything about her.

That's fine. I don't go. Okay. Deal.

Oh, okay, then. All right. And he's going to try and shake your hand. It's like, we're good then.

It's like, we haven't. You haven't said that. Okay. And he'll take his hand. And there's a moment where he does. decides how many bones of his hand he wants to powder.

Good thing he doesn't use his hands for work. Right. I mean, he's a foreman.

I think that's what stops him is, is he's like, it's just a good firm handshake. And he's like, okay, so whenever you're ready with that name, and then we'll be out of your hair.

All right, there's a really rim and proper teetling woman. He's Billson and she's, and she's, And she's going to take a little, like, map of Estherhold out and kind of sketch. It's towards the center of the city.

But it's in a building, you like, it's in a part of town. You just haven't visited yet. But there's a merchant district down that way.

And it looks like she's situated yourself in the middle of it. You're not sure if she's like a merchant or just rich or whatever her deal is. But yeah.

She's a bit uptight. But, you know, if you're just straight with her, she'll answer questions, probably. She was pretty open with us.

They didn't know about the demons.

Did she know about the lake? Did you know about the lake that she put you under?

I was not aware of any wetness.

Do you want to try again on that phrasing?

I don't. My cave was dry when I was in there.

Nope. Don't say something else.

It was a real gusher when we... When we...

Season with a stop sign came up again.

Coward, Susan? We don't...

It was a real squirder.

There we go. See, she could make that joke. We can. We come off like perverts. Yes.

Yes.

Yes.

He is going to very quickly get that box from one of the guys. And he is going to. hand it over to you.

We'll give the cavern a bit of time to dry out, and then we'll see what the damage is. Thank you for going in there. We couldn't have gotten rid of those demons.

So again, whatever collateral damage was done, I'm sure it was necessary.

Yes, I was obviously necessary. Listen, we killed all the demons. And we unfluttered your lake for you.

But it's still pretty dangerous. I don't think I would continue operations here. And he's saying it a little bit on purpose loud enough so that the men can hear it in addition, it is not safe.

And it would be unresponsible if you were to send people in there to continue operations.

Worse things than bone demons in there, actually, we found.

What did you find?

Well, it's lucky you were only here for copper. because if you were going to stick your picks into anything else, I mean, it would have, just, you would have not have survived. Oh.

Also, the gas pockets in there are out of this world. You did not prepare us sufficiently for the amount of gas in there.

Oh.

And there's like a whole bunch of other demon-y things. So who knows, who knows what will come out of those.

It's demons, I bet.

Yeah. If I were a bed, man.

It's a Thursday session. God damn it.

I mean, he's not wrong. I can't even marry him.

It's probably in your best interest not to explore that tunnel. That tunnel at the very least. Like we said, the methane levels for two, the extremes where we could barely breathe.

and then the lake. We don't know if that was just one pocket. Probably you would not want to expand that direction if you are going to continue.

Mm-hmm.

All right.

It killed my dog.

What?

We had a dog. It killed my dog. You.

Wait, I didn't see a dog when you went in. Where was the dog? What kind of dog?

Someomable dog. You know, magic dog. That kind of thing. Oh, so not.

Not a real dog.

I'm sorry.

I'm sorry.

I just lost my dog. Can you believe this guy? You get back at an hour, right? It's like a good.

I'm like,

I'm sorry. I'm sorry.

I'm not at the desk as I'll do it.

I'll hit him in the mouth.

He's going to hold his hands up. Okay. I mean, and he's going to talk to what is. It's not a real doll.

Point is, don't go in there anymore, okay? Take the copper that you have. Go, keep your lives, and you're good.

All right. I'm going to send a Raven back to back to Miss Bilsen and see what we could do here. I just thank you for the warning.

Yeah. There's kind of a far away look. Like it's like, what the fuck am I going to do here?

Like this sucks. Like, she's going to yell at me.

I'm so much trouble.

Via raven. She's going to yell at me.

And then he does grabby hands for the shotgun.

Do you want to tell you about the shotgun?

Yes.

I have been waiting. To tell you about this shotgun. I almost mess.

message to you. But everything is content. James.

We talked about how you aren't allowed to do that anymore. So.

Lindsay was getting real weirded out.

I thought that picture we said, we had to put some rules down.

Assuming, by the way, that there's nothing weird with a gear heart and that nobody's been touching anything, right?

No, they're not. They're not. They're not. They're not.

No. But Ruby was off on her own doing a little bit of a just making sure everything was cool. This is her baby. So she's making sure.

All of that Ruby missed. But as soon as the grabby hands are happening, she will have picked up on it and she will be line back over to see what Logren's new shiny toy is all about. She's going to be over his shoulder.

And he won't even realize that she's going to bathe him, basically.

He loves that. Okay. The overkill shotgun is a four-barreled monstrosity that should not be.

This thing, its basic functionality, fires two barrels at once. Now, right off the bat, this is a bit more stable than your current shotgun. Right?

So when you just use. the basic. It's like, hey, I'm firing the shotgun.

That's two, two barrels, unless you say otherwise. That fires at a 20-foot cone in front of you. You're not picking a target anymore.

You're picking a general area to vaporize. Now, it is a ranged weapon attack that rolls four D-6s in a cone, and the dice explode one time, which means if you roll a six on one of the damage die, it just rolls. another D6.

And it does that for any of them. It just does it one time, though, right? You have to roll a saving throw.

Mm-hmm.

And if you should fail that saving throw, you are not prone and half of that damage is done to you.

Okay. Okay.

But the check is much lower than what you're used to. Okay.

Okay.

Now, I love a good risk reward. Three barrels. Same thing, basically.

It's a 20-foot cone in front of you. You're just saying, I don't want that thing to live anymore. 66, right?

The attack gets a negative two because it is just like you're just, like you're just, but. Same thing with the save. And, you know, the dice explode one time.

But there's one more thing you could do, which is say, fuck it and fire all four barrels. Now, all four barrels, 20 foot comb. Same strength check and everything.

It's a little higher because it's, you know, it's a bazooka at that point. 10D6 in a cone in front of you. And the dice infinitely explode.

So every time you roll a sick on a D6, it just keeps rolling another die. And if that rolls a six, you just keep going. Would you like to try it just to say you did it?

I think that there's no way logging gets into the gear heart without just removing a tree from the landscape. Yeah. I point it in a direction and I remove that direction.

You? Now, I thought about this a lot because you, sir, I fucked with you a lot. The last couple of sessions, I did. The overkill shotgun is in your inventory.

It sure is.

It's already coded for you.

Oh, my gosh.

Chut it, chew it, too, too.

And it is called...

You got to use the four-barrel.

Yeah, we're rolling fuck it here.

It's called fuck it.

It's called fuck it. Okay. So he will, for this test shot, not do the whole thing with, like, posting it up on his shield. He will put the shield down, and he will look in a direction where there is nobody. and he will make sure that there is nobody.

And if there wasn't, there isn't now.

Whole years. She said to chimera and 190.

There's our sixes.

Yeah, that keeps going.

It just keeps exploding. It just keeps exploding. 62 of thunder damage.

I've rolled an 11 for the attack. I roll an 18 for the strength throw. So my luck with the strength save continues.

So you didn't roll. You have to roll the strength show after. It's telling you what the DC is 18.

I see.

Oh.

Yeah.

It's telling me no token selected. Let me just roll. Oh,

yeah. You can just roll here. Yeah.

This is just a test roll. Oh, well, okay. So.

Never mind. I spoke too soon. My strength, save throw, luck has ended.

So this is just a pretend for funzies thing. But if this were combat, that would probably crack a rib or two. Just to plan.

It would do half damage. It would have done 31 damage to me.

Yes.

Okay.

How many hit points do you have?

At this moment, 46.

So that would have hurt.

So fuck it mode is is emergencies only, I think.

I think that's what it was coded for, right? Like if you're saying fuck it, it means, fuck it.

I'm going to do it.

I'm going to be consequences.

I'm more careful shower. We're going to roll with advantage and use the shield here. Not the attack with advantage.

I don't want that. I'm going to roll the save with advantage. Two barrels.

Here we go.

Oh.

Exploding,

guys.

Okay, so it's a 24 for the attack and 17 damage on two barrels and then we'll roll the strength save with the damage.

Which is only 13. And we can Chop of 1 to take a 13. That's a 17 total. See, that's way more reasonable.

That's what Logger and says, oh, that's way more reasonable. Okay.

I'm going to tuck my rib back.

We'll cough out this blood into a handkerchief.

But again, that's a 20-foot. cone, you're doing 17 damage too. That's uh,

effective.

Here's seeing this in action. Here's what I'll do for you. If you want. For fuck it mode, I'll make it a 30 foot cone if I could have four more D6s in there for the damage. Remembering that if you fail, half that damage gets done to you.

Can I make a counter offer?

Always.

Rather than making an attack roll, can it be that everything in that ring? has to make a deck save.

I can code that. Does that include you?

If I fail the strength check, yeah.

Okay, no, no, no, no. You don't get two saves. Never mind.

I don't keep my strength save. Thank you.

I was picturing it Looney Tune style where the gun was stationary, you hit and then you try to dodge the gun for some reason? I don't know why.

I mean, have you seen how people hold guns sometimes? They do have to be.

All right. I can do that. I'll change that for you. Okay. Get on that stat.

Yeah. We can wait. It's fine. Everybody just sit tight.

And not trying to break the system, but when it makes sense for half damage, on a successful save. Because if they're still in the cone, I don't know.

Oh.

Like fireball smell?

Yeah, yeah, yeah. We could do that. If it's a save instead of an attack, fine. We can do that. And then, yeah.

Because they're like, they're in the cone and if it's just like shrapnel coming at them.

Yeah.

And because. Yeah. And because Logren's so armored, the strength saving throw is just to make sure that it's kind of like tight to him instead of it.

Capow. Like, if there's an inch or so, that's going to powder his joints. So he won't take half damage if he succeeds.

He'll take no damage. Obviously. But just to make sure.

It's understood. Okay.

Okay.

Well, that's a gross little weapon. I can't wait in an actual fight.

Farron already has ideas for different ammunition for this thing. So we'll have something to talk to review about.

Can I hold it? She's vibrating. Yeah,

I took all the shells out, but you can hold it.

That's okay. I just want to see how it works. And she's going to go crisscross applesauce on the ground, like tearing it up. not literally, but like looking in every bit and piece.

Just that she broke it. God damn.

Do you have another one? She's not taking anything actually apart, but she's looking in every, she's going to understand how this thing works. She's falling it away.

Yeah, this is kind of a, this is something I'd classify as an artifact or like experimental weaponry.

Yeah, for sure.

You know, just once guns, became a thing. It's like, well, how big can we make them? Where's the limit?

Five barrels, six barrels, let's go.

We couldn't figure out if a barrel, man. They just were like, what is it about?

I think once people start hurting themselves, firing the weapon that there's, but I think then it's like, man, okay. But different ammo has got to be a thing, right? Like, either it's out there already or it's something you can make or

That would be cool.

Can't wait to use that.

Yeah, that would be really cool.

All right. Are we piling in the gear hearts and heading north?

Yes.

I think we have to.

All right.

And marking this place on a map. Though, I think, I can sense this place. If we get within a mile of it, I will automatically know where it is.

because of portals. So you're our living map. But yeah, this is marked in everybody's map wherever any place in a notebook, everything.

I do have a question.

I don't see you guys coming back down south ever, but, you know, maybe.

If there's a portal to anywhere, it might be worth the trip.

I think this is more of a home base than we realize. Not home base, but a...

Let's move the fort. Yeah.

Come on, everybody.

My question is, since the road to Odysia is basically non-existent, because nobody goes to Odysia.

Sure.

We are about a third of the way. Two-thirds of the way back to Esterhol, a third of the way south from Asterohold. Is this a road here? Like, do people travel this far down often enough that there's actually a road here? Or is this still like nobody comes out here?

More of a road.

There's more of a road. Yeah,

no, it's more of a road. Like, you could see that there's a crew here mining. and stuff like that. And you'll have hunters and stuff like that. So it's not unheard of that people go this far south.

Okay.

Further than this. And you've already seen it's like, oh, boy, okay, this is.

So this mining operation is basically why there's a road currently. It sounds like.

Yeah. Yeah.

Or at least why it's, you know, as worn as it is right now.

Yeah.

Okay.

Exactly.

Okay. So that'll help us find it too. right? Like the fact that the road basically ends past this mind.

I don't see you guys losing it. I really don't. But like, I imagine it's marked in your maps. And if you get within a mile of it, you can, you get a little ping.

So like, you're fine. Yeah, you're fine. I wouldn't pull that shit on you guys.

Don't worry. I would pull a lot of other shit. But like that one?

That one, you know better. It's fine.

No.

You're never going to make it back. Don't worry. I have plans for you guys.

Go back to Asterole. There's a lot.

Yuck yucks.

Yeah. There's a lot to do there.

Well, I'm scared to ask. Susan, can I get a travel die, please?

Yeah. Give me something with a lot of experience, guys. I know how much we love random battles. But...

I'm so scared you're going to roll a random battle. I've tweaked the table and I'm still scared to you're going to roll. Oh, God.

Yeah. Okay.

It's kind of low, guys.

Triple the experience, guys. If there is a random battle, be sure to blame it on me, guys, because I paid Jason for it.

Let them a little, little something.

It was a note that said you better fucking keep me.

There's a crew drawing on it. So the stick finger stabbing another stick figure.

Wait, what did, I love that picture that Ryan posted.

I saw that.

That's too much effort for that gag.

So you guys are going to be making a stop at some point. stretch your legs. And we're going to move you two spaces closer.

We're doing it day by day, unless I hear differently. And you're making good time. And it's, it is, it just ticked over into the 28th.

And you guys are, you're, you're, you're kind of doing these shifts in a way that, You get to kind of camp and break and stuff like that, but you're driving kind of late. Because you just want to get back to Asterole, right? And I need a perception check from everybody, please.

All right.

Oh, hey, I just want to say to, too, that our next orb appearance is on the 29th, so it's the next day. It is coming out on the box.

Jesus, Susan. Oh, okay.

Hey, Jameson.

Nice. You're sleeping in the gear. I just kind of rolled you to sleep, like white noise. Oh, object, object.

I'm frightened.

Oh, actually, that plays into what I was just about to do. Jameson, would you roll on the table for the perception?

Please roll a tooth.

Hey, folks, Jasper here. Sorry to interrupt everything. Listen, we want to connect with you.

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Thank you.

This works out great. Oh, my gosh. It's really cool.

Mom and dad are scared.

Wow.

You guys are dozed off and just like, hurrah. What? Something's going to perch on the front of the gear hunt.

I'm drawn to the warmth. Something like that. And the two of you who are not frightened, give me a nature check, please.

Oh, fuck it, hell. Okay.

Nobody was ready.

I'm here with two. Ruby with a 10.

This is like late night driving, right? I really is.

Speaking of someone who did the 21 hour drive, one shot down to DragonCon, this is indicative. This is it fits perfect. By the time we got there was just we aren't the same people. We're forever changed.

Kimer is just smoking some of that Fay Wyatt, fay wild grass in a seat next to Ruby. Like,

Ruby is not. She's like, I'm driving, but she keeps going, Like second hand smoke.

It's a pop box.

I can't lift the roof anymore. It's too heavy. So I don't know. We'll have to figure nothing out.

This is like the Scooby. This is the mystery machine.

Yeah. What the fuck is that?

So whatever's happening. So that's what chimera is doing very slowly. Like, hey, what the fuck is that?

But Ruby is already slammed on the brakes. And it's hard. The gear's already stopped.

And then you're like, what the fuck is that?

Slam on the brakes. You hear Ninth year and go, Ah!

That's got to be what does it because you're going to. So you're going to hear something just kind of like, boom. And it's kind of a big thump.

And there is a massive bloodhulk. It is a, it is a giant bird. It is blood red.

It almost glows in the night air. And it's going to land and then just kind of like look in the windshield, like doing bird shit, just kind of like, and I says.

Let's do a bird shit, get it off.

We're the listener. Jason moved his head in a very birdlike manner around the mic.

Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah.

I'm working on it.

Good body work.

Yeah.

Thank you. I owned a chicken. once upon a time. That's deep j's lore.

We need to talk about that later.

Okay. Yeah, we can. So this thing is huge.

And it's looking in and I think that's what, I think that's what Nythera and and Lagerd wake up to. And it's like, like, like, you know, any time you see a creature that isn't one of you for, it's never good. So I think it's like, so.

With a 10, Ruby's going to be the closest to knowing any lore about bloodhawks, right? So bloodhawks are rare birds that tend to travel in packs, flocks, whatever they are. We need to go.

What's a hawk formation? What is that called? I don't know.

I don't even know. Yeah. I don't even think hawks. do together.

They probably don't. These ones do. So their feathers are prized in the magic community because they are used to spell components for some high level shit. That is nothing who someone wants to go out and collect. It is a chore. So there's more, but with a 10, you're not going to know.

Mm-hmm. Ruby. So everybody, she's going to slam on the brakes.

Everybody else is going to scream. Camera is totally cool about it. What is that?

You see that, right? You see it too?

She's going to take a beach. She's thinking. Yeah, I see it.

Um, nobody moved for just a second. This could be kind of cool. is does anybody else see any others?

Or is this the only one? She's staring at it. She's like locked in with this thing.

She doesn't want it to leave, but she doesn't want to not know where and win if she does.

A four-barrel shotgun slide. I'm going to give this car.

I'm going to give this car wings. Just give me one second.

She waves him away. No, no, no, no, no, no. Is it looking like it's menacing? Is it looking?

Is this the kind of creature with a 10? Would she know? Are they in danger or is this just a rare sighting?

Ah. You know what? Actually, the two people woke up. Give me a nature check. Let's, let's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's.

She's going to flip a couple of switches. She's going to flip a couple of switches. And so maybe not bright lights are going to happen. But there'll be some lights that come up a little bit enough to light this thing up a little bit. We're going to see it.

Jameson, this is not. You guys are.

I don't think I should shoot this gun tonight. I don't think it's a team.

It's a four.

I got a four total.

And the ninth area of 13, which is the highest I think you've rolled tonight. So.

I think it's a high. We're rusty.

Yeah, we're rusty. Okay. So with a 13, there's just a little bit more lore.

It is considered good luck to have one of these land near you. And it is considered a blessing if they fly away and drop a feather. It's considered like a fortune cookie type of thing.

It's like, oh, great fortune. will come your way because, you know, because even if nothing else good happens, you get this feather, which is probably worth a handful of cash to someone, you know. That being said, these are not birds that can't defend themselves.

They are, they can be pretty nasty. But that's only if they're provoked, usually, they don't attack out of nowhere, right? They are drawn to warmth.

So that's probably, again, why it landed on. on the gear heart. But while you're looking at it is definitely scoping you guys out too.

It's doing that urge shit of like. Ruby's doing it back.

Yeah, Ruby's, they're locked in with one another. It's kind of beautiful.

Yeah.

But, God, one of these. Oh, God, that really startled me, Ruby. War me next time.

Yeah, I'll warn you next time. Yeah, I'll warn you next time something lands on the hood, I have to slim on the brakes. Don't worry.

Thank you. But this thing, hippies in the forest, the druids, they say it's a good luck if it shows up. And then if it flies away and leaves a feather, it's like extra good luck.

Okay.

It won't generally attack. So I guess just wait for it to leave.

Check this out. I'm going to attempt to cast charm person on the bird.

Jesus.

It's not a person.

Yeah, no, I found the flaw too. Let's see if we can. Okay.

Do this for me. Paint a picture for everybody, right? Like, what is true?

charm person look like when you cast it.

When you're high and cast it.

Yeah.

Right.

Yeah. Like,

okay. Well, what I want to know is what does it look like in your head? Because what's happening externally is never what's happening internally when you're high.

So like, you've probably, you've definitely charmed people before, right? This is a spell you've used. What does it look like under the best possible conditions?

So I think, um, you've definitely charmed people before, right? This is a spell you've used. I think what this looks like is Chimera puts his finger out.

And they're sort of like, it's not flame, but it's sort of like flame-e, wispy, kind of like purple miasma, sort of like coming off his fingers. And it wisps off of his fingers and off of his eyes. And so he just kind of like wiggles his fingers.

And here's the thing that nobody knows. knows he doesn't have to wiggle his fingers, but he does it anyway.

That's how it works is you have to wiggle your fingers.

You have to wiggle your fingers. Yeah. And it becomes like really intense and the can't like if this were a camera, the lens would be sort of like an extra wide lens and it would be sort of like zooming in and dolling at the same time just really slowly on chimera's face into a close-up. and then on the bird's face, and then on chimera's face, and then on the bird's face, and like, we're building connection that way, you know, and like slowly, the background, like, falls away into this blur, and it's just their faces. And both of their eyes are sort of like widening their pupils are getting larger and larger.

But what's really happening, James.

Right.

That's what chimera thinks is going on.

Yes,

that's what chimera thinks is going on. Cut two. What's actually happening.

It's a deep in the way.

The higher you roll, the closer your vision matches. The lower you roll more. I'm just going to go nuts in a description. Yeah.

Oh, yeah, I've ever been more excited to roll what you did.

Yay!

Yeah,

that's two. Okay. Yeah.

Okay. Here's the thing. What's actually going to happen?

And we know this spell would work on a fucking bird anyway. But Kimer had a plan. What's actually going to happen is Kamiro's going to say, check this out.

Lean forward and just kind of go, like he's straining. Like he's trying to mentally bring the bird in. So it's just this weird grunting kegles thing he's doing.

Like his bottom half is like trying to propel the spell for it. It's like, like he's just going like this. Yeah.

Like it's just, you know, there's a lot of hand wiggles. A lot of hand wiggles. Like it's like that must be where, you know, and the bird's going to like get closer.

But it has nothing to do with the spell. It's going to see little wiggling fingers. It's like, yeah.

It's going to kind of get a little. little closer. So Kimeir is thinking, I'm nailing this right now.

This is so into me. Like it's... To everyone else, what? What?

I think we just see how long he does it for. Yeah.

At some point, Ruby's gonna... Nice job, Fireball. And she's going to...

I'm charming it. You can touch it. It's fine. It's fine. You can.

Thank you. She's going to unstrap herself from the whatever she's hooked herself into. That's the makeshift seatbelt.

And she's going to grab a couple of things from the dashboard, I guess. This is where she keeps some jerky. And she's going to flip a couple of switches.

And she's just going to stand up. And she's going to push open the hatch on the top because she just unlocked it. And she's not doing this.

Yeah.

Did you give me an athletic check?

Sure, yeah, yeah, yeah. I mean, she knows she's going to have to go for it.

Yeah.

She is.

The way the roles have been going, I'm curious.

Yeah, I agree.

How many fingers get smashed?

We're not there. She's not going to, she's not done.

Has not the deal with being dumb.

I've done that's fun.

Yeah, totally.

Yeah, 20, 20 athletes. So, yeah.

She's not like desperately jumping down and pushing the thing open. She's just like, nice job, fireball. Okay, click, click.

And then she's going to open that hatch off. And she's going to, you know, gently step onto the seat. She's going to get up out of that kind of like, you know, hand solo, opening the top of the Millennium Falcon for Luke to fall in it.

And she's going to, she's going to hold out her hand with some jerky in it. And she's going to go. And she's going to go.

Chip, chip, chip, chip. She's being gentle.

Give me. Give me an animal handling.

All right.

Now, I'm not trained in animal handling, but can I assist because I am technically...

Charming.

Charming is a generous way of saying it, but you know what I mean? Like, I'm distracting it.

You're being not threatening.

Yes. There we go.

I'll tell you what. You give me a D20, right? An 11 through 20 and the wiggling is going to be enticing.

It's going to be like, like tiny little animal's worm, something like that, right? A 1 through 10 and it's threatening. Something about it is like, oh, that's a predator.

You know what I mean? So you're going to sue that or rile it up. Don't ask me, it's bird stuff.

I don't make the rules.

Just how birds are.

Just birds, baby.

Are shooting 11 or higher, 11 or higher. That's what I want. That's what I want. That's what I want.

We can't play on Thursdays anymore, guys. There's a reason we play on Sundays or Wednesdays. That's it. That's it.

With this carefully crafted team of experts that Loggerin is constructed. He has no healers. And nobody who knows a fucking thing about wilderness.

Just none of them. Four city kids on a road trip. He has no idea what to do.

Nobody can change.

I would be a bird and raised in a forest.

It's like a bird has derailed you and the concept of having to eat. Like those two things have to eat. What do you think?

We're out of food. Yeah, that's our biggest enemy so far. We might start taking applications when we get to.

We need a healer.

We need a healer.

You need a vet or something. Like, you need something. A vet who can cook. That's what you eat.

Who can we scalp from another team?

So it's going to be very threatening to this bird. So I want an animal handling with disadvantage, please.

I'm sorry. I'm sorry, Jasper.

It's okay. It's okay.

It's okay. It's going to be really funny. Like,

I'm going to do a little bit of extra. I'm going to give my once a day oomph that I can add an expertise die on to or something just to give me a little something, but it's going to still be disadvantage.

That does give an expertise die to both of those roles. So that's pretty cool.

Oh, okay. Great. Here we go. Yeah.

And a plus one because LagerN's team work thing.

Okay.

Hey.

That's an 11.

So, okay. So this Hawk is going to kind of like get closer. Now the thing is, in the passenger seat is doing this shit.

And you're offering your hand, which is five stationery. You know what I mean? It's like, oh, it's more.

those. These are just, these are just braver. Like, you know what I mean? So it will see the jerky.

And what I'm going to do is because that's an 11, I'm going to roll a D20. As long as I don't roll a one through five, it's going to take the jerky and you're going to be fine.

Let me guess. One, two, three, four, five. Which one's the thumb? That's all I got to know.

Now, I'm going to ask you guys, should it be a 1 through 5 or a 15 through 20 or 16 through 20?

Yeah.

1 through 5? Okay.

Yeah.

I don't know which is more likely. I don't know if I'm rolling like crap tonight. But I do know how all of you were rolling.

So I'm going to just. All right. Here we go.

Great.

You are.

Hey. Hey. You're cute.

You're beautiful. Look at you. your feathers.

Holy shit.

You lost your sixth finger.

Oh no. Ruby's classic sixth finger we never talking about. It is going to take. It is going to take this jerky after like kind of getting in there.

And it'll probably, it'll probably end up kind of like pecking at your hand, your palm to. So that it's kind of like a fool. Oh, wow.

Can I get a constitution saving there please?

Sure. She is not expecting to be like a cat. You know, like a house cat. She's like, yeah, no, I get it.

No, because it's a bird. That's good.

Oh, no. It has a bird flu.

Susan, no.

Okay. So 13, you're not going to pull back too much. It's going to be like, so you'll flinch a little bit.

It's okay.

And the bird will like.

I got you. You're good.

So the person has a jerky in its mouth and it's going to look up at you because you kind of flinch. It's like, it's like, it's like.

Yeah.

Longer and it's like. After it bites you and he goes, careful, those are dangerous.

That's bad advice. Holy shit. I don't do that.

And while that's happening and time here is like, the wiggling's not working, Nithear is just going to take the joint from his hand. That's not longer wiggling and just sit back in the chair, for all this to wrap up.

Oh, no, it is working by the way. Go ahead, Ruby. He's a friend.

It's really majestic. What's your name? You don't have a name. We need to give it a name.

No fucking idea how to deal with animals.

That's a terrible name.

He asked its name.

Ferdinand.

Yeah. It's good man.

What about burden and?

Burden and.

Burden and.

Stay out of it. But your name is Burden and. Oh, my God.

You're beautiful. Here, she's going to try to give a little bit more. She's like some crumbs of whatever she's got left.

And at that point, she's going to be, she's going to realize she shouldn't know what else to do. Like,

didn't plan this far ahead.

That's exactly.

She's like, I think I'd get here.

It's Bird and where'd you come from? Do you have any friends? He's just talking to it looking around.

Is it with anybody else? Is it with anything else? Is there anything else around?

Well, there's Greg, but we don't have to talk about him.

Greg's always there, though. It's always been. Greg has always been there.

So this bird, it's going to take the rest of you know, after the jerky goes down somewhere. It's like, oh, damn, okay, neat. And then some crumbs and stuff.

It is going to feel the extra warmth coming from inside. And it is going to hop up and kind of start squeezing its upper body into. Like now it's, now it's like doing bird ship and it's inside.

So like half of its body,

it's just going to kind of like squeeze past you. It's like, mm-mm-mm-mm-mm-mm-.

Camera, can you get it?

It's going to get real close to chimera. Just like, mm-hmm.

Oh. Hey, hi. Hello, Bird and Ann.

Are you still doing this? I need to know if you're still doing the wiggling fingers. Are you still casting?

Hang on. One sec.

No, that's fair.

How long can you keep it up?

Ignore that. There we go. Oh, yeah. I am. I definitely still am.

Fantastic.

Yeah.

Oh, shit. Okay. Can All right.

I'm going to roll another die. 1 through 10, this thing is going to chomp down on your fingers. 11 through 20, it's going to think the risk isn't worth it.

It's like, oh, those things can do anything. They're crazy. Yeah.

Fucking wild cards. So here we go. Three.

Oh. Oh. God.

So this bird is now squeezed. This is great. I didn't think this was going to be the episode tonight.

Totally. Here we go.

Does this count as a random encounter? It wasn't supposed to be. It was supposed to be like a fun bit of lore.

But so this, this big fucking bird, its upper half is in, is in the gear heart now. And so the thing's mouth is like this big. It's big.

So it's just come. Like it is going to be able to take like two of your into its mouth and it is sharp. I need a constitution saving throw.

If you roll a one, you might lose some fingers here, ma.

I feel like Ruby is, while this is all happening, she's basically, she's like, no, no, no, no, no, no, for it. Okay, all right, that was not good. And she's basically trying to hold an ostrich from getting into a, until like a big hole. Yeah. Okay, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.

It's like stretching its neck towards.

I'm just to sit the joint from my theater.

It's like a huge dog trying to get on the couch when you're in on your lap and you're like, no, no, come, no.

Just trying to push it and you think it's going to go. But it's like, oh, shit, you're way more solid than I thought. Man, you're a thick-ass bird.

So 17, that's great. It is going to hurt a good. It's a real good.

Motherfiel, though.

Oh, a bird in the end. Burn in the head. Burn it.

Okay.

So it's good. going to start trying to pull. Like, it expects those to come off.

Like, it's like, hmm. So it's doing the bird neck thing. But like, like he's reeling in a fish.

Like he's just trying to, yeah.

Jerky, jerky, jerky, jerky,

jerky, the spell isn't working. It's not working anymore.

Is there still getting glaze? Like, it's this like a thing.

No, I just starts laughing. Okay.

Okay. Do you want to try animal handling again with this jerky, I guess?

I mean, she's trying to get it away from chimera and to get it out as much as possible.

I'm going to level with you guys. I didn't plan this far ahead either. I didn't think this was going to happen.

This is why we play D&D.

I would like to, if I can do something. I'm going to cast press a digitation. and make my fingers taste and smell awful to this bird. Like, terrible.

See, that's interesting. I feel like the constant pain you're under would make casting a spell harder because that's got a, you got to have a little concentration, right? So maybe it is just 20.

It is just a can trip, though. It's not like a hard spell. Totally.

No, but like, okay, you were having the pendicite of stuff. Imagine trying to do another task while. that kind of pain is happening to you.

Oh, baby, let me tell you. I did.

It's like, hey, you want to jump in Premiere and cut this up for me? I mean, it's a thing you've done a thousand times, but it's like, fuck. The spurts got your fingers.

So on a, give me a G20, 11 through 20. Yeah, no problem. One through 10.

One through five, you lose a finger.

Oh, my God, there was a two. It rolled over to an 18. Okay.

Wonderful.

So the taste is going to. to deter it a bit. I want that animal handling, please.

Can I make a quick argument for using my decks as the base for the animal handling rather than wisdom? She is trying to, she's dealing with this thing and trying to physically handle that animal.

Well, that's not going to make it want to eat the thing you're offering anymore. It is a distraction,

I guess. She's saying, jerky. She's trying to push it out. She's pushing it out and trying to get it.

Your hand motions, I thought it was like, she's, like, I thought you're trying to milk it. And I'm like, okay. Okay.

Whatever works.

That's going to get it to come in more. We don't want that.

She's halfway out already herself, Ruby is. And so this bird has kind of come down in. And so she's trying to keep it forwarding further in.

It's still grabbing. And so I feel like, I don't know. I'm just arguing for some decks.

Animal handling with decks. Go right ahead.

All right. All right.

That's a crit. A roll on that One.

You're hoping that you aren't a threat at least for now. You have advantage on the next animal handling check against the target creature.

Here's the thing. You were already cool in this hawk's book. It's like, well, you check out. This wiggling motherfucker I don't like. He's been giving me weird eyes the entire time.

It's weird.

Birding in, stay with me. Stay with me. Stay with me. Stay with me. Not with the bad man.

It will let go.

It'll let go, but it's kind of got to give a like a like a nasty little like fuck you in bird. Like you don't speak it, but it's like, hey, like you definitely call it.

It gave me sad.

It's a loud in here too. Bird in there.

Like the biting hurt. That hurt a little more. Like that's also in a different way.

Yeah. Ouch.

So she's pushing this thing out, getting its attention, distracting in and coaxing it out so that it's back up onto the top of the curve. All right.

Sure. I got to do one more thing.

I imagine a bunch of feathers pull on this thing, too, just all over inside the gear heart.

I, we're getting there. I wouldn't have mentioned it without. I need to know. If this bird has a taste for weed.

I care.

For a wild weed.

Yeah, just the stickiest of the icky this bird is into. I don't know, but let's see. One through 10, yes, 11 through 20.

No, it's repelled by the set. Of course it is. Two, it is going to shove its way fully into the car.

now. And it is going to climb in between the driver and passenger and perch on that little console that kids like to perch on to and get in between like mom and dad while they're, you know, and it is going to be face to face with Nythera. And it is going to be face to face with Nythera.

And it is going to gently try to like, like, try to take the blunt out of her hand as it goes up to her mouth. Let me get that. Very gentle.

This makes her start laughing again. Because now it's just, okay, it's a bird that likes to get high to. And it's like, okay, bird and then.

And then she's going to like get out of the seat, hold it up to it. And then like lead it out of the vehicle. Like, come on.

You can hand it to it. I mean, Ruby's still standing halfway. She's looking down at all in this. So you could pass it to Ruby as a. as a way to coax it out. If you wanted to do that.

Nighttheir fights is hilarious. I told and she's laughing. I told you guys just to let it go.

It's just gonna fly off. Come on, Bird and Ann. If you want this, it's really good.

And like lead it towards the exit.

Pips-ps-ps-ps-ps.

Give me a dexterity saving through, please.

Okay, how about it? 24.

24 is great. So it's gonna keep trying to try. to like, Mr. Miyagi with the fucking, like, it's going to try and catch the fly with the chopsticks.

So it's trying to like, like, and you're just like, you're, you're, you're, serpentine. Like, you're trying to get this blunt out and Ruby's going to take it. And the second it leaves the vehicle, uh, Bird Nand is going to shove its big bird ass through that, just kind of like, so there's going to be a bunch of. So there's going to be a bunch of, of feathers because it's going to have to hop and take flight.

So as it goes up, it's just going to hit kind of a two or three times like, like just up.

Oh. Oh. Oh.

And then grab this thing and fly off.

Bye burning and. Oh, God. I miss you. It's been 30 seconds this whole thing.

And then I hear it's going to grab some of the feathers and be like, well, these are worth a lot, Logrin. So I guess this was worth it.

I'm trying to understand what just happened. Because Logrin was actually laughing until it got in the car. And then he immediately stopped laughing.

But he's relaxed now that it's back out of the car. And it's like, let's not. Ruby, let's not lure giant animals.

into the card.

It usually goes pretty well.

No, it has never once gone well.

It could.

No.

Before she closes the hat, she's going to look around for whatever other feathers that might have been in that area. Grab them all up. She's going to put them in her hand.

She's going to hand them over to Nithera, not to Chimera. Because who knows what he may need them? I don't know.

I don't know.

Could you each do me, favor? We're going to be the amount of feathers you guys get.

What? I love how we stumbled into this and it's not exactly a blessing. We're going to tell everyone it was though. That's the day.

That's the thing. This is a story no one would believe. Like not a single person. It's like, yeah, then it took it and flew away.

Like that's what I think of this group and Lagerin putting all of us to I think that that is a common thread throughout our entire time together is if it weren't us, nobody would believe. I'm glad you're all here. So this is reflected in someone else's eyes because hell if this is...

If I told this story in a bar, someone would try to pee me up. 100%. Yeah.

Imagine getting together a legendary assassin and a genius engineer, the best con man in the world. And somehow a bird enters and then it's like,

Here's the thing. You guys are all good at one thing.

And it's in first.

I really like this. Me and Susan were talking about system stuff and this. This solidifies so many things.

I'm talking about. It's like, damn, this is such a good example of some of the things. But, oh, let me see.

Ruby, the hero. Oh, Kimmer. Can I get 2D4, please?

And these are all just. on your face.

I'm trying. I'm having some like the tables like so good. Connect connection issues. Oh.

Someone would roll for.

Yeah. I'm not seeing any rolls or anything like that. It's all good.

Yeah. So all good.

Who's going to do it?

Uh, I'll roll one.

Okay.

Someone else roll one. James and roll the other.

Okay.

Go ahead. We're splitting this up now.

Three.

All right. Let's see.

17. 19.

14. 14. So 19, right?

Wow. Nice.

Plus eight.

Plus a D-21.

So many turds you left.

The Gearheart is not going to be in great shape.

This is starting to feel a little planes trains and automobiles with the Gear Heart. Like, it left pristine. And this thing is pretty fucked up. Yeah.

There's a lot of noises that should not be happening.

So the street value of these feathers is 35 gold per feather.

How many did we get?

19.

We're all doing the math.

Yeah, it's easy math. Everybody knows 38.

16665.

It's a good day's work. Get a couple more hours. There's birds in there.

Exactly,

exactly.

I told you.

Loggerins out the top, waving jerky. your own.

no, give it a joint. Give it a joint.

I don't have much of that left.

We might lose money on that.

Someone out there is going to be mad you gave it the weed. And it got him like, someone's going to be mad at that. I don't know who.

It gave her nature.

I think it's a fair trade.

What type of bird was that again?

A bloodhawk.

Blood hawk. Bloodhawk.

When you first said it, I heard bloodhulk.

That's what I heard.

I heard that's a very different thing.

I know I did pronounce it that way a little bit. I am sorry. A blood Hulk would be perching way more interesting. I feel yeah.

I felt much more threatened to begin with. And then we were describing it doing bird shit and I was like, what the fuck kind of creature? It's going to say.

Red Hulk is.

It's right. It's right.

Ruby will close the the latch. lock it up, flip the switch. She's going to get back into the seat.

Strap herself in. She's going to look. Before she does anything, she's going to look and make sure that there's nothing about to land.

Burden ends not coming back. And then she's going to.

I like that you were going to make camp and you're like, let's just drive another hour.

Get out of the way. There's a lot of bird shit here.

You know what we're going to do? One. Technically, you did solve that problem, so there is some XP.

So we're going to give you guys 3,000 XP. It was going to be 1,000. But let's split that three ways.

Three, one, two.

Four ways. Sorry, why did I say three ways?

Three ways. Because we're going to be a.

I can be a. I just go.

I caused the least amount of problems in that encounter.

That's true. You can't. So 7.50, yeah. So instead of rolling on the table again, we're going to have you guys get ready to coast in to Estherhold.

But first, there's the matter of this box. You crammed an orb into that box, and it's coming out today. So we're advancing the time to the 29th.

It's the end of the 29th, technically. So this orb is going to be visibly changed. It is going to appear slightly larger, about 25% larger, you'd say.

And when you open the box, if something doesn't fit into it, like as you lift the lid, That space will be taken up by the object as if you sat it on top of it instead of inside of it. If it's too big, right? If that makes any sense, because the lid opens all the way.

And you're going to see a bit of a red shimmer for a couple of seconds after it leaves the box. And as we discussed, it doubles in strength or devastation or whatever the thing is. if you guys put a walnut inside, the walnut will either get bigger or there'll be two walnuts.

It's true. The nuttiness will be.

It's often the nudiest nut.

The nutty is nut.

Big nut is the name of this episode.

It must be burden and. It must be burden and.

Charm Poultry is also very good.

Do we put it back in?

Yeah, what are you doing with this?

Can I do a, can I, can I, can I sense this red shimmer? Like, I'm assuming I can sense that it's more powerful. We know that without having to like do a check or anything. But can I understand this red shimmer at all?

Well, we already knew it was a little unstable. Like it was, you know, definitely explained. But that instability is doubled.

So every time you put it in, the characteristics of it, so the power of it doubles. And the instability doubles. So it will eventually get to the point where if you jostle it too hard or you just like it's made of paper machet, but filled with a nuke.

Do you know what I mean? Like, cool.

So that's what it is. It's a visible representation of it being more unstable. Okay. Gotcha.

Yes, it is a warning sign. It's like, hey, don't drop me. Don't drop me before, but really don't drop me now.

Does it still have the safety rubber band?

The band is doubled in strength. Yes. It is two rubber bands now.

Looks fine. Ruby says.

How far do we have to take this thing again?

The entire trip.

Well, don't have to carry it every day if it's someplace safe. A box is not the place. I agree. But maybe we can find a place for it where we know it's not going to be touched, won't be stolen, and nobody else knows it's there.

What time of day did we roll into town? Is it still like daytime? Or is it?

Like dusk.

It's dusk. Okay.

Yeah.

First thing tomorrow, we got to go. We got some things to do. First thing I'm doing is going down to talk to the Smith. We're going to make a new box out of Adamanty.

Oh, God.

We have plenty. That makes sense.

I think we should start using it.

I think we should start using it too. And there's no better reason than to keep something real safe. You realize we've been carrying a bomb inside a bomb. for the past, you know, a couple weeks.

Well, you're the one. Yes, you put it there. We know.

I'm just now realizing that we could have died a lot. A few times over, in fact. But we're here. It will keep it safe. And I'm with you.

Kind of exciting.

No, Camara, no. It's not exciting. It's deadly. No, you can help it. So we put it in code check at the hotel.

They do give you little saves in the motels or something. I don't like this up.

Can we loggering into the silk sheets again?

Well, after that trip, we're going to silk sheets. Immediately. We're assuming.

We're selling feathers and we're going to stay in the silk sheets. Yeah.

Nice.

Do we know we're just on those, by the way?

No, but we can go to our... We have an apothecary we need to go to because I'm sure...

Oh, yeah.

Chimera needs to look at Ruby's tattoo, make sure we understand what the discounts are right now. If there's any coupons, there's any specials.

You guys were also heading to the Merchant District anyway, so if you didn't, you're going to find one.

True.

And that sounds like it's a good time for us to stop for the night, so we can get ready and do all this. And kick off the next session. Session with it.

I run some errands.

I like coming to Esther Holt with our list. Rather than Estherhold having given it its list. I've given us its list. That's what we did for a real.

I have to talk to any of the people. We're not going to. We're.

We're blinders. No. No, it's crazy.

They're all birds. Everyone's birds.

We don't have to deal with that.

We're so bad at birds, guys. We're terrible at birds.

I decided I'm not going in any longer. The mirror is good out here, I think.

A second thought, Camelot is a silly place.

Yeah.

It's pulled up to the gates and it's just a flock of like, who? Oh, do this shit?

Like, he told his friends. This is what happens when you feed like a crow, right? Oh, yeah.

Oh, yeah, Crow Army.

But it brings us shinies.

Yeah.

Oh, shit. Are we training birds now?

I don't know if hawks do that. Guys, I don't like,

hey, hawks are pretty famously trainable, right?

Oh, yeah.

Well, you're not to a good start. That's a falcon.

Yeah.

Hunkers. You know.

Yeah.

Raptors. Raptors. They're all the same. Yeah.

Rampures. You know.